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Asuka continues to walk down the road, never looking back, as she fears the sight of her poufy-haired Kohai will trigger the tears she’d been holding back. She’s never been very good with goodbyes, which is why she’d hoped to avoid them all together, but leave it to Kumiko to leave an impression without even trying. “What a cute little lamb she is,” Asuka says with a chuckle. Somehow, Kumiko always managed to find herself in the middle of all the drama, playing the mediator in situations time and time again. She’s nosey, and awkward and could do with a filter, yet Asuka finds herself smiling from ear to ear as she thinks of her. “There must be something wrong with me, surely something for being so forthcoming with her. Why did I?”
Asuka thinks back to all the times she was so open with Kumiko. She’d made it her mission to remain as neutral as possible in every situation. It’s always been about nothing more than the Euphonium for her, that’s all that’s ever mattered for her, her true love. As long as she could play and devote herself to practicing it, she was happy. She could be free from all her problems, even for just a little while. She did her best to keep her personal life private, including the situation with her mother, but with such a public scene, it would’ve been impossible to hide any longer. However, she still did her best, refusing to open up to anyone, even to Kaori and Haruka, her closest friends. This was a situation that she couldn’t discuss even with them.
So why then? Why would she share such a private issue with Kumiko of all people? It seems almost like a sin that she’d speak of her past and her father to her Kohai and not the friends she’s been with since the beginning, yet she did. Why did she feel so inclined to share such things with Kumiko, without her even having to ask? “Just what is it about that girl?” she wonders to herself. Why has she always had such a soft spot for this doe-eyed little lamb?
She may have only been pushing so hard into Asuka’s life due to the pressure of the other band members, but that by no means made Asuka obligated to let her in. She could have easily refused her and shut her down, just as she did everyone else, but even when she tried, Kumiko refused to give in and eventually it was Asuka herself that surrendered. No one has ever been able to do such a thing. “That girl snuck right past my defenses, that sly little thing,” she says.
Asuka has always kept such a mature air to herself, it was all intentional of course, as she couldn’t let anything distract her from her goals, but thinking back now, it was always Kumiko that brought out her childish side. She may have used humor as her shield, but it was always a mature humor, one that was passive enough to not hurt anyone, while still getting the message across. However, with Kumiko, Asuka was playful just to be playful. In fact, she just couldn’t help but tease Kumiko, and she gave the best reactions in return. “She never minced her words or held back either. She never seemed to think of her words before speaking,” she says amused.
She thinks back, to the very first time she laid eyes on Kumiko. She saw her and somehow could just feel that she was made for playing the Euphonium. She could never explain it, but she somehow felt a kinship to her, and wanted to recruit her desperately. So, when she said she’d never played the Euphonium or had any interest, Asuka was disheartened because she was so sure, but then to find out later that not only had she played it, but was amazing at it, Asuka felt a connection even stronger than before. It was from that day forward that she found herself quite interested in Kumiko, wanting to take her under her wing and nurture her. She wanted her to think of her like a sister and after finding out about how Mamiko had been Kumiko’s inspiration, she even more so wanted to be that kind of figure to her. “That hasn’t changed, right?” she asks herself out loud. However, she thinks of the times she joked about love and relationships and even how she told Kumiko she loved her after that encounter with Shuichi. It’s almost as if….
Suddenly, Asuka stops dead in her tracks. She finally allows herself to think about what just happened. Kumiko’s confession, their sentimental exchange and the promise of meeting again. She had no intention of taking Kumiko seriously, figuring it was all just the usual Kohai to Senpai love, but now she wonders. She recalls her father’s book, her most precious memory of her father and of her past. Something she’d never think of parting with, yet she gave it to Kumiko so readily. Walking away from her after that, was one of the most difficult things Asuka’s ever had to do. She suddenly becomes conscious of the heaviness in her chest and in response, the tears she’d been holding slowly pool in her eyes and streak down her face. Everything becomes clear in such an instant, she lets out and audible gasp. “I really….”
She quickly turns around, having made up her mind and wanting to see Kumiko right away, but when she does, she comes face to face with the exact person she was on her way to see. “Kumiko…why are you here? Aren’t your sectional practices soon? If you slack off I-.”
“I’m sorry Asuka Senpai, but I just couldn’t end things that way. I was so happy to receive your father’s book and I will take great care of it and be sure it gets heard by my future Kohai, but I couldn’t let you walk away without making sure you really understood my feelings. My confession to you was one of admiration, as I do want to play like you because you are amazing and I really look up to you, just as I do my sister. However, my feelings for you are more than just that of admiration. I didn’t realize it before, but I realized it soon after nationals. I realized how happy I was to share in your excitement, over your father’s praise of your performance. The third years retired from club after that and it was only after not having you around all the time like usual that I started to realize, having you around was some of my most enjoyable moments and I started to miss that. I felt so empty with you gone and lonely, I found myself missing you so much, and feeling sad when I would see you briefly and then you were gone again, like that time after seeing Shuichi, when you told me you loved me. I was so sure it was just your usual jesting, but I realized later that I didn’t want it to be just that. I realized I desperately wanted you to be serious. I realized that the regret I was feeling, was from not having told you how I felt. So, that’s why I told you just now, that I loved you. I could never understand you in the beginning, your mask was so thick, I could never see through it, but over time it got easier and although others may think I’ve just become good at breaking through it, I disagree. I think that you loosened it for me, because you wanted someone to break it and I really hope that someone was me. I don’t want to say goodbye, but I don’t want to leave it at see you either. I want us to be together, even now that you’ve graduated. No matter where you end up, I want to be with you. I told you before Asuka Senpai, that I wanted to hear your sound forever, for the rest of my life, do you remember? I meant that, because now I know that I want to be with you for the rest of my life. I love you Asuka, I really love you. Please say you love me too.” Kumiko takes a deep breath, her frenzied speech finally coming to an end, as her rosy cheeks deepen and fresh tears fall from her face. She has no idea what’s going to happen next, but she made a promise to herself that no matter what, she’d make sure Asuka understood her feelings, so that she would have no regrets. She looks down at her feet, unable to look up, due to embarrassment.
Asuka looks at her daring Kohai standing before her, her legs trembling. She laughs out loud and walks over to her, patting her head. “You really are a little lamb, saying all of that first and only afterwards thinking about what you’ve said and being embarrassed. I’m so happy to hear your feelings, but first, do you remember that time I said the Euphonium is the only thing I truly love?” Kumiko nods, ready to be rejected. “That’s still true, but I also said before, on that day I played my father’s song on the river bank for you, that you truly are a Euphonium Kumiko, do you remember?” Kumiko nods again, wishing that she’d just reject her already and free her.
“I think I understand now, why I seemed to be so drawn to you from the day we met, why I wanted you to play the Eupho so badly, why I kept harassing you and wouldn’t let up until you agreed. It was because I saw that potential in you Kumiko, I saw your Euphonium soul shining through and thinking back now, I realize that it had captured me from that very day. I became smitten with it and while unrefined, rusty and a bit crass, it was a beautiful soul and it yielded such a beautiful sound. Hearing that sound become refined and shape into something worthy of respect and praise, has been the highlight of my year. I think I realized that you are the only one who can truly understand me Kumiko. You are the only one who can share in my passion for the Euphonium because we are cut from the same cloth. Playing with you was such joy, because I could feel the resonation of our Euphonium souls with every note. It was always you and I from the beginning. That’s why I knew that only you could be the one to pass on my father’s song to others in a way worthy of its genius. I’ve finally come to see Kumiko, that it can only be you, it’s always been you. You are a Euphonium Kumiko, as am I; therefore, only you can be my true love. It’s always been you Kumiko, it’s always been you right from the start. So, I love you too.”
Kumiko finally looks up, her teary eyes wide and trembling as she stares into the deep blue pools of Asuka’s. “You, you really mean it? You really love me Asuka Senpai?” she asks.
“I do Kumiko, I love you very much, I always have. I can see that now.” She wipes Kumiko’s tears. “We’ll be together from now on, just as you wished, so no more crying ok?”
Kumiko smiles widely, excitement filling her voice as she says, “we’ll really be together from now on, just you and me? Do you really mean it, like really?!” Kumiko is ecstatic.
“Yes, yes, I really mean it my little lamb. We will be together so much, you’ll be sick of me. But for now, you should get back to practice, or I shall punish you!” She tickles her.
Kumiko laughs out loud as she shouts, “ok, ok, I’ll go now Asuka Senpai, please don’t punish me!” She turns to run back, but before she gets away, Asuka grabs her arm. “Senpai?”
Asuka ruffles Kumiko’s poufy hair and takes her face into her hands. She pulls her closer, their foreheads and noses touching, as Asuka silently smiles with closed eyes. Kumiko can hardly believe they’re in such close proximity and turns red accordingly, but doesn’t dare pull away. Instead, she closes her eyes and takes her Senpai’s face in her hands too. Finally, Asuka whispers, “shine bright my precious Euphonium, make me proud. I’ll see you soon.” She pulls back and smiles at Kumiko once again, before finally releasing her. “Go on now.”
Kumiko blushes heavily, but still smiles through it all as she nods and says, “I will Asuka Senpai. I’ll make you proud by helping us win that gold. I swear I’ll do it, just watch me!” Kumiko waves and then runs off happily, having successfully conveyed her feelings to the girl she loved and getting a favorable response. “I have a girlfriend now.” She whispers to herself in glee as she makes her way back to the club room, feeling like she can conquer the world.
Asuka watches as her docile little lamb returns, missing her already. She’s not sure where things will go next, as despite always knowing she had an interest, she’s never actually dated another girl before. Surely Kumiko as well, has felt very confused to her own orientation and Asuka must admit that she’s surprised it was her Kumiko chose, considering the obvious chemistry she had with Kousaka-san. However, she knows better than anyone that love is a fleeting thing and there can be many kinds of love, even platonic, as such is the one between the two compared to her and Kumiko. Surely, they will face many obstacles and opposition in their lives, but none of that matters right now. She’s finally found her truth and is prepared to see it through to the very end. She continues walking forward as she smiles to herself and says, “yes indeed, you are a true Euphonium Kumiko. My precious little Euphonium, it’s always been you.”