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By the time AJ set foot back into Basketon the moon hung low and dawn was beginning its slow march on the eastern horizon. The drunken haze had long subsided from the death mage’s mind and a familiar irritation had settled itself back into place. It could be seen in the way she dug her muddied heel just a little too firmly into the treehouse ladder and the impatience with which she hoisted herself upwards along its ropes. She cursed under her breath at the way her magic had slowly sapped her of feeling as one leg threatened to give way under her weight. The treehouse did nothing to dampen the noise of a late night intruder and AJ attempted to convince herself that she didn’t care if her fumbling woke anyone. Being as she was currently — quite unfortunately — sober, said attempt was unsuccessful. At the top of the ladder, she found the dwelling was dark and quiet with no signs of life. Occasionally, the tree swayed at the mercy of a strong sea breeze, but the furniture somehow remained unmoved, unfaltering. AJ took a deep breath and began shedding off all her excess gear.
When she was finally down to just a tank top and pants she flopped like a dead fish onto the couch. Her bones screamed something fierce in response and she was, yet again, too sober to forget her magic’s burden. Flick soared somewhere nearby, AJ could recognize the nervous beating of her familiar’s wings, flying close to the canopy. I need a drink.
But fatigue held too strong to her skin and the decay mage found herself turning on her side, facing the opening in the treehouse’s leafy exterior, eyes tracing the sky, looking at the constellations. AJ had always liked shelters like this, high, secluded, ample view of the stars. She remembered when it was simply her and Flick, listening to the branches sway and watching the moon rise. Thinking about food. Thinking about gold. Thinking about both food and gold.
That was the reason AJ found herself back here in Basketon night after night. Nostalgia, familiarity.
That was the only reason.
She was just about to settle into sleep when she felt something poking her side.
“Flick, not now.”
The prodding continued and AJ sat up with a loud, exasperated groan. Her godforsaken crow was now perched on the couch’s armrest, wings flapping with urgency.
“This better be good, I was almost about to fall asleep and dream about a world where I don’t get nagged by a nosy little bird all day long.”
Flick seemed currently impervious to the dry humor, simply beating her wings louder, and AJ knew whatever had happened was serious.
She shot up off the couch and her fingers twitched reflexively for the dagger she always kept sheathed in her pocket.
But there was no noise, commotion, or fire. Just a dragon standing in the room’s entryway, shadowed in the foliage.
“Glyph? You’re back? What’s got Flick so worked up?”
Glyph simply nodded his head in the direction of the top canopy. Now fully awake, AJ could hear the shuffle of leaves above and the sound of movement. Magpie is here? How long has she been here?
Exhaustion hung to her frame but AJ fought past it, following the two animals as they led her to the treehouse’s top floor. AJ hadn’t even known there was a top floor to begin with, the ladder shielded by leaves and branches that seemed to thin out as the decay mage hoisted herself higher. As she got closer, the sound of the coughing grew louder, and there was definitely murmuring, a fast, frantic speech. Though AJ could not make it out.
AJ felt like a true intruder now and every fiber was screaming at her to descend, but Flick nipped at her heel with that annoying tenacity that meant there was no backing down now.
“Magpie? Are you alright? I’m coming in.”
The talking suddenly stopped, and when AJ finally made it to the top and her eyes settled on the redhead, her stomach twisted.
It was just Magpie, as AJ had suspected. And with the lamplight shining nearby the decay mage could see blood scattered about the flattened canopy floor. Bottles reflected the light’s glow, strewn about the scene with abandon.
‘I know a wounded animal when I see one.’
Flick settled on a nearby branch, an unspoken question, Will you run?
Glyph made his way back to his rider and attempted to comfort her with a rub of his head.
AJ looked at her familiar, then back to her friend, and sighed deep, as if being held down by a heavy weight.
“Oh, Magpie.”
“I-” the fellow mage doubled over as another cough sent blood scattering on the leaves.
AJ said nothing, she was far too tired for lectures, banter, or retorts. She simply walked over, crouched down nearby and watched, a hairs breadth away from touch she stopped herself from trying to rub Magpie’s back, stiffening with realization.
It was a habit so deeply engrained, a simple gesture of good will to the sick, but Magpie was different, not privy to those unspoken social rules of touch or comfort. AJ moved her hand back down to her side.
Magpie watched the aborted gesture as she wiped a streak of blood from her mouth. Her mismatched eyes looked focused. The smell of booze had long abated. She’s not drunk anymore, is she? When did she drink all of this shit? This morning? Did she come back right after our conversation and do this? Fuck. Fuck!
“I thought you’d be asleep by the time I came in,” the woodland mage’s voice was barely a whisper. Her eyes darted between her friend and the bloodied floor in that characteristic, nervous Megii way. AJ let out an exasperated puff of air and Magpie took note, eyes refusing to look away from the decay mage as she cast her own gaze to the side.
“You’ve been drinking, Magpie.”
Megii’s eyes hardened, “Is that so bad?”
AJ sighed again and stood up, pinching her brow and refusing to dignify that deflection with an answer. She made her way down the ladder and after a beat, Magpie came trailing behind.
A beat. “Are you going back to bed?”
“No, I’m going to get some water.”
I’m going to get some water for you.
“Oh, I can make you something to drink, AJ. Do you want coffee?”
They made it to the bottom level and AJ let out a languid yawn as she made for the kitchen. “I’m all coffeed out at the moment, I’m just going to get some water,” a moment of hesitation, “I’m assuming you want a cup.”
Magpie froze for a moment in that specific way which told AJ that the Smart One’s gears were turning. The Smart One’s gears turning usually meant bad news for AJ.
“You’re getting me water.”
“I’m getting the both of us water.”
AJ let the sound of water moving from the storage keg into a glass bottle distract her from her friend’s unabating gaze.
AJ poured two glass bottles, and let one sit untouched on the wooden counter, by the time she made her way back over to Magpie the retching had returned. Bile rose in her own throat at the sound.
“Drink this,” she hated her own voice in this moment, soft. Raw, exposed like a live wire.
Another beat. “Thanks.”
Blood ran a gnarled streak down Magpie’s face, from the side of her lips down to the end of her chin. AJ picked up a cloth she’d grabbed from the kitchen and prepared to hand it to the other mage when she suddenly felt warm fingers gently clasp around her own, moving her hand up to Megii’s face, the cloth now brushing against her cheek. AJ inhaled sharply.
“I just thought-“ Magpie seemed to be faltering now, embarrassed by her impulse, “you can see where it is better than I can, so if you wanted to-“
“No, it’s okay. I can do it, Magpie.”
I just thought you were still afraid of touch, went unspoken.
AJ realized quickly that Megii’s hands weren’t burning hot, her own were simply achingly cold as she slowly brushed the cloth across her friend’s cheek. Two eyes stared into hers, wide, focused. AJ fought the urge to break her gaze.
There was something so natural about the touch, Magpie’s hand in hers at the beach, AJ’s hands around her neck as she demonstrated something for Megii’s book. It didn’t feel frightening, and somewhere deep down, under all the layers of her own bullshit, AJ secretly hoped it wasn’t frightening for Magpie either.
The blood flaked off like bits of fallen ash and AJ found her gaze naturally falling to the spiral which snaked on the woodland mage’s neck. Coughing up blood was definitely a side effect of some kind. AJ tried to keep her thoughts clinical, at a distance from her own emotions as she wondered if this had anything to do with the phrase she had uttered down at the beach. Magpie seemed to have read the question on the tip of AJ’s tongue somehow and AJ could almost recall why exactly she started calling her Smart One.
“The coughing, the blood, is a side effect of the curse. It hasn’t stopped—“
“—since I used your phrase down at the beach,” AJ quickly completed the sentence.
“AJ, don’t do that.”
“Do what?” AJ moved the cloth away, her voice still rang with the hollowness of a person who was still far too sober to be here.
“I don’t know,” Megii wrung her hands, trying to collect her words, an ‘I don’t know’ from Megii-Magpie always meant ‘I do in fact know, I’m just not sure if what I know will be received well’, “That thing you do where you feel bad but then pretend you don’t. I don’t want you to feel bad.”
“I don’t feel bad.”
Magpie dug a fang into her lower lip, finally growing irritated herself. For what reason AJ just couldn’t quite understand.
“I mean it, okay? I don’t feel bad! I didn’t know that’s what saying that phrase would do to you. Honest.”
Magpie nodded, not quite accepting that for a response but deciding to store it away for a later date. Her symptoms seemed to have eased off for now and AJ let herself sprawl out on Magpie’s couch, the woodland mage resting in a seated position next to her head.
Another beat of silence. though without the sound of retching AJ finally found her heart rate had slowed. The leaves rustled with the taking of a gentle night breeze.
Magpie still sat next to her, characteristically stiffened. Even with her eyes closed AJ could tell she was being stared at. Maybe it was because she was sober, maybe she was just too tired to care, maybe it was the disturbing amount of empty wine bottles that now lay around this place, but AJ found herself unable to refuse the utterance of a simple phrase.
“You’re really angry with me aren’t you.”
Magpie shifted, head turning fully towards AJ and when the decay mage opened her eyes she found a shocked gaze meeting her own.
“I’m not angry with you about using my phrase, AJ. Come on—“
“Not about that. About what I said in my dorm this morning.”
Magpie averted her eyes, “Oh, that.”
“Yeah,” AJ closed her eyes again. She told herself it was only because she was tired and had nothing to do with trying to avoid her friend’s pained expression.
“Angry isn’t the word I’d use to describe how I feel, I don’t know, AJ. I have a lot going on right now.”
“Stop deflecting, Smart One, it’s a bad look on you.”
“Says you!” Magpie seemed to practically bristle and a sly smirk crawled its way onto AJ’s face, it faded as quickly as it came. “It’s not—I’m not deflecting. Or well, I’m not trying to. It’s true, I’m not angry at you, AJ. I just—“
AJ opened her eyes again and found Magpie looking between her and a point somewhere far in the distance. “—I think I’m just sad, AJ. And that’s not on you, you’re not obligated to say it back to me. I told you I’d love you enough for the both of us, and I meant it.”
“I know you mean it,” that infuriatingly soft, live-wire voice was back and AJ silently cursed herself into a sure oblivion. “I just—“
Another beat. The quiet rustling of leaves, the sound of Flick grooming her wings nearby.
“I can see I’m hurting you Magpie. Can’t you tell by now that’s just what I do?”
AJ could swear her life flashed before her eyes as Magpie stood up and unceremoniously flipped her out of her nice sleeping position and onto the floor. “Oy?! What the hell Magpie?!”
“You think you’re hurting me, AJ? You think I want you here in Basketon, with me, for what? To torture myself?”
A sly smirk returns, I have a death wish, “Maybe.”
“Ugh,” Megii pinched her brow, “I told you I loved you and you still think you’re some sort of negative force in my life,” AJ scooted back onto the couch, legs crossed, dark eyes fixed on the woodland mage. Magpie began pacing the room.
She came back and faced AJ head on, her hair picked up in the wind like leaves in a storm, “You don’t hurt me, AJ. I hurt me. Me and this curse and all the other fucking bullshit I can’t do anything about. I know you think you’re the center of torment in my world, but you’re not. I said I would love you unconditionally and that’s flaws and all. I’m not some scared little animal that needs you—“
Another beat, a realization.
“Ugh,” Magpie sat back down on the couch, arms crossed.
Why do things always end up this way with us?
“No, you’re not. The wounded animal is me, right Magpie?”
A sigh, one wrought with exhaustion.
AJ couldn’t keep the pain from twisting her own expression. Magpie sat by her side and they now found themselves quite close to each other again.
“I don’t think you’re weak, AJ.”
“And I don’t think you’re weak either, Megii-Magpie.”
“Wounded doesn’t have to mean weak.”
A brief stare down.
The tension seemed to dissipate as quickly as it came. An agreement between two who would normally resort to baring teeth at the slightest provocation.
AJ sucked in another sharp breath as Magpie suddenly reached for her hand, taking it in her own and looking down at it pensively.
She met the decay mage’s gaze and her eyes widened a fraction, she was about to pull away, when AJ found herself interjecting:
“No, it’s okay. I just thought you hated touch.”
Magpie turned over AJ’s hand in her own, eyeing it again. AJ felt the room heat up a fraction of a degree.
“I’m trying to become more comfortable with it, with the people I care about.”
“Oh,” AJ said stupidly.
“You know, for someone who always tries to push people away, you don’t seem that touch averse.”
AJ regarded Magpie thoughtfully, “Yeah, I guess you’re right. It depends on the person, though, for me. And the kind of touch.”
Magpie tilted her head, here comes the curious bird, “What do you mean by kind of touch?”
AJ looked to Magpie, fingers suspended in the air near the mage’s other hand, who nodded with permission as she took her left hand in her own and brought it up to her scalp. “Well, I’ve always liked people combing through my hair. Well, ‘people’ is a generalized statement. I mean people who aren’t men, and also Flick.”
She released her friend’s hand and found herself suppressing a shudder as Megii ran a gentle hand down her dark strands. “Just, combing it? Like a brush?”
“Yeah, pretty much. It can be soothing.”
Magpie seemed careful to avoid AJ’s tangles (which there were plenty of), and AJ could not suppress the shiver which took hold at the gentle caress.
“Are you okay?”
“Um, yeah,” Am I embarrassed? Why am I fucking embarrassed? “It was just a shiver.”
“Like, you’re cold?”
“No, no.” Magpie moved closer, now a hairs breadth from her face, “Sometimes people can shiver because touch feels, well, good. It’s hard to explain.”
Megii blinked, AJ added, “are you really going to go pull out that book right now.”
“No, not right now. I will pencil that in later, though.”
“Of course you will.”
Magpie tilted her head again, eyes focused on AJ with growing intensity. “I want to experience that too.”
“What, touch feeling good?”
“Well yeah, that. But also, the shivering, I think.”
AJ’s eyes widened a fraction, “Well, pencil it in and I’m sure someone would offer to help you with it.”
“Well, you seem to experience it, so I kind of want you to show me. If you want to.”
Jesus, Magpie, going straight for it, huh?
“Well, usually it involves gentle touch along the neck, and scalp. I could try something, if you want.”
It was Magpie’s turn to blink stupidly, “Sure.”
AJ moved closer and silently cursed herself for being sober enough to agree to something intimate with one of the people she specifically wanted to keep at arm’s length at the moment. But the magnetism to Magpie was growing stronger and stronger by the minute and AJ managed to convince herself that this was fine, totally fine.
“Well,” cold fingers danced close to the woodland mage’s neck, AJ watched with fascination as heat rose quickly to Megii’s face from the contact, “You can softly touch the neck, like this,” she was now truly a hairs breadth away from her friend’s lips and she was not sure quite how to process that information. Magpie’s eyes were wide and AJ quickly realized the palm currently being held in her own was beginning to sweat, “And again, stop me at any time if you need to,” the fingers traveled up and through the mage’s thick hair, glossy strands that fell through the decay mage’s hand softly. She traced Magpie’s scalp until she reached the back of her head, and stroked her fingers down gently until they emerged from one long strand, slowly releasing it over her friend’s shoulder.
“Wow,” Megii’s eyes were wide.
“Did you feel it?”
“Well, not quite like you described, but that felt, well—“ Magpie wrung her hands, embarrassed.
“It’s okay to admit it, I’ve been told by many women that I’m excellent at what I do,” another smug grin.
AJ received a light punch to the shoulder for her efforts, “Yeah, yeah.”
“But seriously, did the touch, well…hurt?” Did it hurt coming from me? Went unspoken. There was a knot in AJ’s stomach.
“No, it didn’t hurt at all,” Magpie’s voice was soft, contemplative, “You don’t hurt me, AJ. It was…I have a lot of feelings about it, all of them positive.”
“Well, I hope that helped with your writings, Smart One.”
A chuckle, “Yeah, it did.”
The moon was now but a faded wisp on the horizon, the sky had begun to lighten signaling the beginning of another Summer Kingdom morning.
AJ laid back, eyes closed, arms rested behind her head. Magpie finally stood up.
Was there a possibility of us kissing, just then? Me and Magpie?
The thought made AJ feel as though she were plummeting head first into freezing water.
She shoved the thought aside for another day, hopefully a day where there was more drink at hand and less depressing conversation.
Well, the night was not quite over yet, and in the morning, when AJ drank again, she would pretend none of this ever happened.
“I have a hard time saying it.”
“Saying…what exactly?”
“You know what I’m saying.”
“I don’t know and you are the most stubborn little bug I’ve ever met.”
AJ groaned dramatically and flopped herself out like a fish on the beach, “Magpie, come on!”
“You have a hard time saying ‘I love you’. That’s what you mean.”
“Quick thinking, you’re well worthy of your nickname.”
“So that means…” Magpie adjusted herself, “I thought you didn’t love me.”
AJ said nothing, simply curled up and let her hand rest under her head, eyes closed.
A beat passed, Megii’s statement hanging in the air like a heavy weight.
“Hm,” was all that came from the (supposedly) now sleepy decay mage. Magpie sighed and stood up.
AJ had perfectly mastered a fake snoring routine by the time Megii returned, a blanket was draped carefully over her sleeping form and a pillow placed under her weary head.
She’s tucking me in again. And something about the action sent the knot from her stomach up into her throat.
“Good night, AJ.” Came a faint voice, and AJ wanted to scream out.
Don’t go, don’t go. Just please stay here with me.
There was a gentle squeeze of her hand and then the sound of her friend heading up the ladder to her bed.
AJ pulled the blanket up to her face.
Tomorrow, she would go on some new misadventure.
But tonight AJ was content with the gentle call of the sea, the rustle of the leaves, and the memory of Magpie’s hair, her warm skin, the feeling of her touch.
The words left unsaid.
There was another beat of silence, and AJ drifted off into sleep.