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Dazai woke up to pain shooting though his leg. His answering scream was abruptly cut off by a stern voice echoing from near the source of the pain.
"Quiet you waste of bandages! Any noise too loud could bring the ceiling down on us!"
Dazai stifled his scream down to a drawn out groan as the pain continued to abuse his nerves.
"Kunikida, why are you so mean to me?"
"I'm realistic. There's a difference. Hold still, your leg broke in the collapse and I need to stop the bleeding."
"Collapse?"
"Yes," The former math teacher squinted up from where he was positioned at Dazai's calf, "don't you remember?"
He closed his eyes for a moment, reaching back into his mind and only finding only blankness until he recalled going to bed the night before. Why couldn't he remember?
"No …"
"Hmm … You may have hit your head. I'll check for a concussion once I finish wrapping up your leg."
Dazai continued to search his memories in the following silence, staring up at the low rock ceiling above him, lit only by the light of Kunikida's phone flashlight.
Rock.
Collapse.
Rock.
Collapse.
Nothing.
"Remind me." He finally murmured.
Kunikida was still wrapping his leg, using strips of what Dazai recognized as his tan trench coat. He filtered the pain, pushing it to the back of his mind in favor of listening to Kunikida's words and allowing them to dredge up his fuzzy recollections.
"We were on a joint mission with the Port Mafia. Three of them, two of us."
…
"Great I'm stuck with this asshole for the millionth time."
…
"Chuuya." Dazai muttered.
Kunikida raised an eyebrow in his direction. "That's right, Executive Nakahara and two members of the Black Lizard. Hirotsu and the quiet one.
"Gin." Dazai supplied.
"Right, them. I really don't know why the President and Mafia Boss insisted on pairing the Executive with us again. They do so every time, and every time the two of you cause more trouble than it's worth." Kunikida shook his head as he continued recounting the events of the past few hours.
"Anyway, the group we were after had taken shelter in an old cave system on the far outskirts of the city."
…
"Hey Chuuya, good thing you're so short! You should have no trouble fitting into a bunch of tiny mining tunnels!"
"Who the hell are you calling tiny you asshole!?"
…
"Mining tunnels."
Another nod. "That's right. We all went in together, but they were prepared for us. They set off a trap to separate us and then detonated the tunnels." Another glare directed at Dazai. "Actually, if you and Executive Nakahara hadn't been fighting with each other at the top of your lungs, we probably could've snuck in with them none the wiser."
Dazai hummed in reply. Probably not. He and Chuuya didn't argue when they believed it would jeopardize a mission. Their group would've been watched from the moment they approached the tunnels and the cave collapse would've happened either way. This group was clever enough that even Dazai hadn't expected them to go so far as bringing the entire cave system though. He had expected nothing more than an ambush.
A miscalculation on his part.
None of which he was going to share with Kunikida though. He was in enough pain as it was and didn't feel like getting shook around as if he were a rag doll.
He tilted his head around to take in their surroundings, being careful of the pain he could now feel at the back of his skull, probably the cause of his momentary memory loss. They were in a small pocket of rubble, the ceiling of debris only slightly higher than Kunikida's head with him kneeling as he was. Dazai's right side was pressed up against the wall while there was only about a foot or two of space on his left where Kunikida was situated.
The space overall was barely bigger than a coffin.
Kunikida finished wrapping Dazai's leg and slowly reclined against the wall with a grunt. Dazai narrowed his gaze at the blonde.
"Kunikida?"
"Hmm?"
"That didn't sound good."
"It's nothing."
Dazai glared. Why was it the partners he chose always had to have a hero complex?
"You're injured. Tell me."
Maybe it was the firmness in his voice, a bit of the old Demon Prodigy leaking into the tone. Or maybe it was the fatigue and hopelessness of their situation, but Kunikida gave in quickly.
"Ribs. Unsure if they're broken or just cracked. A gash on my back, but the bleeding is sluggish, I don't believe it's deep. And a twisted ankle.
"Your leg is very broken, the bone is coming through the skin, but it looked like a clean break. I'm pretty sure you acquired a concussion, but besides the memory loss, you seem lucid enough."
He paused.
"That's it for the physical damage as far as I can tell."
Dazai latched onto that wording.
"Physical damage?"
"Yes."
"Would you like to clarify that at all?"
"Not particularly."
"Oh come on Kunikida!" Dazai whined. "It's boring in here! Tell me what's on your mind! What dark thoughts are torturing you here in the dark with me?"
Kunikida sighed in exasperation. "You'll pester me until I do, won't you."
"Yup!"
"Fine." The other man growled.
Wow. Kunikida was giving in so easily, it made it almost no fun!
… Almost.
The blonde hesitated one more time before finally confessing what was on his mind.
"I … I don't want to die."
Dazai blinked. That … was not what he had been expecting. He wasn't even sure what he had expected to be on his partner's mind, but that was not it.
"Why would you think something so silly?"
Kunikida scowled at the brunette on the floor.
"Look, just because you're ok with dying as soon as possible, doesn't mean everyone else is looking forward to such a prospect."
"No, no, no." Dazai interrupted, groaning as he levered himself into a sitting position so he could be on the same level as the other man.
"I mean why would you even be worried about death in this situation?"
"Because, Dazai," the blonde clenched his jaw as he spoke, trying not to snap too much at the concussed detective before him, "we are both heavily injured, bleeding, buried beneath who knows how much rubble, I lost my notebook, and you ability is useless in this situation."
Dazai tilted his head. "I still don't see the problem. The others-"
"The others were caught in the exact same explosion that we were. They're all probably in the same situation as us, or dead."
Dazai just continued to stare.
"How the hell are you so calm right now? What if we're the only ones? What if there's no survivors?"
A slow smile spread across the former Mafioso's face.
"Because my dear Kunikida, I never walk into a situation like this without a contingency plan."
"What kind of contingency plan accounts for a situation like this!?"
As if on cue, the rubble above them began to rumble. Kunikida flinched and moved to cover his head, only to freeze and stare incredulously at his partner.
Dazai was laughing.
Barely more than a giggle, but as the shaking above grew, so did the laughter until it was a full blown cackle.
The rubble above their heads began to glow red, shaking and shifting upwards. It was if the universe itself wanted to laugh along with Dazai and his ridiculous mind as Kunikida watched the tons of rock that had been threatening to crush them lift skyward, reveling the blue sky and allowing sunlight to stream into the deep dark hole that the two men had found themselves in.
Kunikida could just barely make out a figure above leaning over the hole as they called down to its occupants.
"Is the fucking mackerel dead or not?"
Kunikida tilted his head back down to look wide-eyed at Dazai's shit-eating grin.
"Told you I always have a contingency plan."