Chapter Text
"You're pining," Lee muttered, sweeping the floor around where Mara was sitting by the window, watching the port.
"Excuse me?"
"Pining. Yearning. You miss her."
It had been three weeks since Chase had gotten on a ship, six months since Jackson died. Mara had chosen to stay back, Chase had promised she'd return.
"And you don't?"
Lee shrugged. "Can't get attached to sailors. They'll chose the ocean over you every time."
"Are you saying she isn't coming back?"
"Everyone knows a sailor has a girl at every port, lass. Don't expect different, you'll end up broken-hearted. Even if she does come back, the ocean's huge. It could be years."
She huffed and turned back to the window, as if wanting could make Chase come home.
But as the weeks wore on, she found she needed something to do. She didn't like cooking, and Lee was territorial over his kitchen anyway.
Chase had gotten hurt trying to protect her. More than once, now. She needed to make sure she could hold her own.
Lee begrudgingly enrolled in swordfighting classes, then taught her what he'd learned. As it turned out, she had a knack for it, and when Lee got tired of the classes, said his body had had enough fighting for a lifetime, she went and demanded her own enrollment.
To her surprise, they allowed it. She assumed they were amused, but they were willing to teach her, and that was all she wanted.
She could finally strike back.
For once, the bruises she carried were worth it.
She was no master, but the stronger she grew, the safer she felt. The safer she felt, the more she explored.
She tried her hand at archery, and found herself to still be a fair shot, but she discovered she preferred a blade. (Letting go always felt too risky.)
Time wore on. Lee taught her how to repair fishing nets, and she made herself useful at the docks for coin, then put that towards convincing a smith to teach her how to make.
That, she wasn't terribly skilled at, but he helped, and she could at least properly maintain the blades she'd collected.
Lee tolerated her growing collection with the same gruff fondness as everything else she did.
Chase returned on a different ship than she'd left on. Mara didn't see it dock, didn't pay it any mind.
It had been five months since she'd left.
Mara returned home late one evening, saw two people instead of one, and immediately pulled a blade on Chase.
Lee didn't have people over. He'd been courting a lady he'd met, Ruthie, but they tended to go to her place, or out together. Lee didn't like people knowing where he slept, he always said.
"Mara?"
"…Chase?"
Lee chuckled. "Don't tell me you don't recognize the woman you've been pinin' after. C'mon now, put the sword down."
Mara studied her for a long moment. She looked… exhausted. She'd lost weight, her hair was shaggy and far longer than she tended to keep it. Her clothes were tattered. She had new scars, which was never a surprise, but…
She finally put the sword away. "What the hell happened out there?"
Chase groaned and slumped onto the couch.
"It's been five months, Chase."
"Don't remind me," she muttered, face in her hands.
"You said, you said that they said it would be a short trip, you'd return soon. A couple months, at most."
"I know," she snapped. "Woulda been, but the ship was captured. So you'll have to forgive me for being delayed."
"Oh." That… Mara had seen that happen a few times, but she'd always been traded away in exchange for the ship.
"Some fools trying to build their own navy, only reason they didn't sink us."
Lee's face scrunched up. "Why?"
"Hell if I know. I don't think they knew. Captain though he could talk his way out of it, they gutted him right there on the deck. Then some other member of their crew killed their own captain," she rubbed her hands over her face.
"That's enough, Chase," Lee cut in. "You go get some sleep."
She nodded. "Thanks, Lee."
She stumbled a bit, but used the wall for support and made her way to her room.
As soon as the door closed, Lee leveled Mara with a glare. "You owe her a mighty apology."
"What!? Why?"
"Demanding an explanation instead of welcoming her home?"
"I was worried!"
"You were angry. And I'm not saying—"
"You're the one going on about how a sailor has a girl at every port, how she wasn't coming back, and—"
"She came back," he snapped. "You know how rare that is? I ain't saying you don't have a right to be angry. But she came back, and you greeted her with a sword and an interrogation."
Mara gritted her teeth, hurt and anger and fear and heartache all warring for their place in the forefront. "What was I supposed to do, Lee? Act like I wasn't terrified? Act like it's all fine?"
"Yes, for god's sake. You were worried. She nearly died. She came back, for you. You could've given her a hug, at least. Told her you were glad she's home and safe."
"She knows that, I'm sure."
"Does she? I'd be goin' up to be sure, if I was you." He huffed and went to the kitchen to do dishes, effectively ending the conversation, leaving her to sit and think.
She didn't appreciate being left to sit and think. The more she thought, the more guilt started to gnaw at her, the more the memory of the hurt in Chase's eyes haunted her, and soon enough, she was knocking lightly on her door.
"Mm? Come in."
Mara hesitated a moment before pushing the door open. Chase was sitting in bed, wrapped in a blanket, her bedside lamp still lit.
"Ah, Mara. I know you must've worried, I—"
Mara cut her off. "No, hush." Chase looked like a puppy that had just been found in the street, and it broke her heart. "I was worried. But you didn't deserve that."
Chase shrugged. "I wasn't home when I said I'd be."
"You couldn't control that."
She shook her head and sighed. "I tried, Mara. I did."
"I know." Mara moved to sit on the bed next to her. "You're home now. That's what matters."
Chase took a shuddering breath. She'd seemed so imposing when they'd first met. Now, she seemed more like a kitten fished from a river.
She started to say something, then shook her head to stop herself. Gods, she looked like she hadn't slept in days.
"Chase? What were you gonna say?"
She clenched and unclenched her jaw. "Can I… can I have a hug? Please?"
Mara held her arms open, and Chase slumped against her chest. Mara carefully maneuvered them both to lie down, so that she was holding Chase, who curled into her with a shuddering sob.
"I've got you, Chase. You made it home."
"I didn't think I would," she whispered. "Thought I was gonna die."
Mara ran a hand through her scruffy hair.
And Chase flinched.
"Oh, Chase," she murmured, pulling her hand away.
"No, please. I'm sorry. I know it's you. Please?"
She ran her fingers through her hair again, more gently this time, watched the way she shivered at her touch. Her scalp was bruised, she realized, and her heart ached.
"Oh Chase," she said again, softer this time. "Sleep. You're safe, just rest now."
"Can you… can we leave the lamp lit? I don't wanna be in the dark."
"Of course," she agreed, pulling another blanket over herself. "I'll leave it as it is. I've got you."
One thing was for sure. Chase wouldn't be leaving without her again.