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It was something Gabriel had never thought would ever have to do again.
What? You think he’s never done something like this before? He’s almost middle-aged, with many years of colorful experiences under his belt. So yeah, he had done this before.
It had been straight out of college. Gabriel had found him outside a coffee shop and they’d gone for a walk in the park. Gabriel had bought them something to eat and they’d bonded. He took him home that day and he could have sworn he was in love when he woke up the next morning and he was still there.
Gabriel had done it right. He’d introduced him to all his friends and they all loved him. Gabriel had given him a piece of his home for him and he had welcomed it. They lived together for six months and just when Gabriel was starting to think that this was going to last, that they would grow old together—he had run off and Gabriel never heard from him again.
So, yeah. Gabriel had done this before and he had no intentions of doing it again.
But it was so clear that Sam wanted it, that he pined for it, and Gabriel wasn’t sure what to do.
They’d been living together long enough for it to not be a surprise. No one would be shocked if one day they just announced that they were doing this. They were pretty much a married couple already. It’s not like it would come out of the blue.
But still, Gabriel was wary. He didn’t want to be heartbroken again.
Sam never said it out loud, but he dropped hints here and there and Gabriel knew him well enough to catch them. It’s not like Gabriel didn’t know this was something Sam had always wanted. From day one, Gabriel had pegged him as a picket fence, two point five kids and a happy dog in the yard kinda guy. It was what Sam wanted, it was where he belonged. They just needed to take the second step towards that goal. Moving in together was the first, now it was up to Gabriel to take it further.
It had been in his mind for a while, but it was never an actual concrete thought until they went to the mall one day and Sam noticeably slowed down as they passed by the jewelry store next to the pet shop, with all the thick, shiny gold bands in the window and a large sign that read ‘FOR HIM’, which Gabriel thought was kind of an eyesore. Sam tried to act like he hadn’t practically broken his neck trying to get a second look as they rounded the corner, but Gabriel noticed. Of course Gabriel noticed.
After that, it was definitely a firm possibility in his mind, something that he decided to give serious consideration.
He did so. Gabriel thought about it night and day for weeks. Then one day, Sam came home from work, practically vibrating from excitement, all his teeth glinting as he chattered through a wide grin,
“So, Chuck…you know my friend Chuck? He works at the firm? Really cool? Kinda squirrely? With the hobo beard? Yeah, him. Well, he has this girlfriend, Becky, they’ve been living together for like, three years now or something? Yeah….yeah, Becky. The one who was in love with me till I introduced her to Chuck? Yeah, you’ve met her. Well, anyways, he came to work today and he would not stop smiling and it turns out that last night he took her out to dinner and he proposed! He asked her to marry him and obviously, she said yes. So now they’re engaged and everyone was freaking out and we had this kind of party at the office. Like, we went and bought pizza and everything, it was kind of crazy.”
Gabriel smiled and nodded along as he listened to the story, feeling like his heart was racing too fast.
“And Chuck is just so excited and he’s so happy and he invited us to the wedding. You and me, you know. And I know you’re not a big fan of weddings, but he’s my friend so I’m hoping you’ll come with me.” Sam laughed a bit. “Man, Chuck is just freaking out. He’s just so in love with Becky, it’s ridiculous. You know, he’s getting her a dog? She’s been asking forever if they can get a dog, but Chuck’s always been kinda iffy about it, because he has allergies, but he’s getting it for her as a wedding present. I mean, what kind of groom gets the bride a wedding present? He’s just head over heels for her and they’re gonna make the most amazing married couple, I can feel it.”
Sam laughed again, breathless. “Sorry,” he muttered, in that cute shy way of his. “I just got overexcited.”
Gabriel swallowed thickly.
“So, yeah, we’re invited to the wedding.” Sam pushed his hair out of his face, a nervous habit of his. “They still don’t have a date yet…but…y’know.”
Gabriel nodded. “I’ll make sure to keep my calendar open for…whenever.”
Sam rolled his eyes and kissed him. Then they went about the rest of their day as if nothing was different, but Gabriel could tell there was something different, something was tense. As if Sam was thinking about something and Gabriel knew exactly what Sam was thinking and Sam knew that too and neither of them would talk about it. Gabriel’s head hurt from trying to figure it out.
That night, Gabriel lay in bed, unable to sleep. He looked over at Sam, peaceful and warm next to him. He thought that he could do this again. He could do this for Sam, with Sam and it would work out this time. Because it was with Sam this time.
Even after making up his mind, it wasn’t a week later until Gabriel asked. He took that week to think about how he was going to ask. In the end, he decided not to make a big deal about it. To just casually pop it on a normal day, during a normal activity. Because even though Sam was a giant girl and a huge softy, big declarations of romance and such made him a bit uncomfortable, which Gabriel was just fine with.
They were watching TV, sharing space, shoulder-to-shoulder and during a commercial, Gabriel took Sam’s left hand in his. He traced the knuckles carefully with his finger and took a deep breath.
“Gabe?” Sam said quietly, as if he could feel something coming. “You okay?”
“Yeah,” Gabriel replied, but it came out choked. He didn’t look up at Sam, didn’t meet his eyes, didn’t think he could. He just stared at Sam’s hand, focusing on his third finger and keeping his eyes glued there. “I’ve just been thinking…”
Next to him, Gabriel felt Sam swallow too. Felt Sam’s whole body go tense and Gabriel knew that Sam already knew what was coming. He had already dipped his toes in the water, there was no backing out. Might was well swan dive into it.
“Yeah?” Sam breathed, and Gabriel could feel Sam’s heart racing. It was almost as fast as his own.
“I was thinking….would you….?”
Sam’s hand tightened in his and Gabriel took another deep breath, forced himself to meet Sam’s eyes.
“Would you….like to get a dog?”
There was only a moment of silence and suddenly, Sam was laughing brightly and happily, wrapping his arms around Gabriel and picking him up, getting them both on their feet and twirling Gabriel around.
“Yes!”