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"Fucking cold as shit down here," Axton chatters out, viciously trying to wrench his tomahawk free of a Rat's skull. "Why's it gotta be so cold? Between this place and Liar's Berg, my nuts are probably going blue."
"So... no different than their usual color," Maya snarks.
Gaige makes a terribly executed whip-smack noise.
"That doesn't even-- you use the whip noise when-- you guys suck," Axton snaps, and finally pulls his axe free with a loud squelch . "Where are the other three?" he asks.
"Uhhh," Maya says, squinting. "There's Zer0," she says, pointing to a pile of corpses.
"I don't--" Axton starts, and then cuts himself off when he sees the Assassin slowly emerge from the murder-pile, absolutely drenched in blood. "Right then," he says, going a little pale. "What about Sal and-- what'd you say its name was?"
"His name," Maya says, pointedly, "Is Krieg. They went that way," she adds on, and gestures all the way across the other side of the ice with her Maliwan. "Somewhere."
"Somewhere," Axton mutters, under his breath. "Helpful."
"We'll jog while we search," Maya says, sweetly. "Maybe it'll make your balls a little less frosty."
"Wa-pssh," Gaige says, again.
"Stop that!" Axton growls.
They find Salvador sitting on a pile of garbage, looking positively captivated. When they approach him, he hisses, "Shhhshh," and then says, "You'll mess up his concentration."
"Whose concentration?" Maya says. Her head swivels. "...Is that Krieg?"
"Is he sitting on a slot machine? " Gaige asks.
"Correction," Axton says, "He's sitting on a Goliath, which so happens to have a slot machine attached to its back."
"A One-Armed Bandit," Zer0 observes. "Carrying a machine known / as the same. How quaint."
Salvador waves at them impatiently, jerking his head back towards the front. They all watch as Krieg's twitching head cranes towards the slots, inspecting the rusty, blood-spattered wheels with keen interest. The hand that isn't clutching his buzz-axe reaches out and skitters uncertainly over the gears.
"...So wait," Axton says. "While we were busy trying not to get our arms bitten off and our gear snagged by Rats, you've been here, watching Krieg sit on a dead Goliath, trying to figure out how to gamble."
He's rewarded with a look that very plainly says, are you saying you wouldn't have? and has to grimace back.
"Fair enough."
"You guys don't think this is weird?" Gaige asks, her tone a little dubious.
"I think it's cute," Maya says.
"If by cute you meant creepy," Axton mutters. "Then yeah, it's kinda cute."
"It's boring," Zer0 says, flatly. "Can we leave?"
Salvador, with his eyes still fixed forward, waves the assassin off. "If you wanna go, you can go," he says. "I wanna watch this."
Zer0 stands his ground and absolutely does not sulk.
"Look--" Maya says, almost disbelievingly. "He's putting his buzz-axe down. Has he ever done that?"
"Well, he sure as fuck is doin' it now," Salvador says, looking fucking delighted.
"Uh, d'you think maybe we should stop him?" Gaige suggests, taking a step forward. "A fascination with gambling could land him in trouble."
"Gambling," Axton repeats. He stretches one of his hands out, wordlessly pointing out the various hills of looted corpses littering their current surroundings. "Out of everything else we do on a daily basis, you're saying gambling is the one that'll land him in trouble."
"Yes, gambling," Gaige reiterates, and sticks her tongue out. Axton looks as if he has to forcibly resist the urge to stick his own out in kind.
"Axton," Maya says, warningly, but she's not looking at him, she's looking at Krieg, who's learned how to pull the slot machine's lever.
"I didn't even do anything," he says, sputtering indignantly. "You're not even looking at me!"
Zer0's helmet flashes a brief LOL before flickering blank again. Axton sputters at that, too.
The Siren glares, rolls her eyes, and redirects her attention back to their preoccupied 'friend'.
"Krieg?" she calls out. Her tone is wary.
Krieg's head slowly swivels over, the first sign of acknowledgement he's granted any of them since they found him. He maintains eye contact with Maya for a few moments before turning back and pulling the lever again without a single word.
"Oookay," Maya says, blinking. "Maybe it's a little creepy."
"Oh, I dunno," Axton quips, smirking. "I think it's kinda cute."
"Don't be a dick."
"I'm not being a dick," Axton says, clearly being a dick. "Yo, Krieg," he calls out, "You know you have to put money in it, right?"
Krieg doesn't look up. He pulls the lever again, the worn metal creaking in protest.
"Maybe I can hack it for him," Gaige suggests, her eyes glinting. "Even the oldest slot machines nowadays have some sort of basic--"
"--Why not just show him how to use it?" Axton interrupts, taking a few careful steps forward, still being ignored."Instead of, you know, just rewarding him for nothing."
"The house shouldn't win in the end!" Gaige yells at his back. "Anarchy wins all hands!!"
"For fuck's sake," Axton grumbles, as he makes his way over. "Hey, buddy."
Krieg continues to ignore him. His visible eye is wide open, staring intently into the faint sheen of the symbols inside.
"You uh, you like those?" Axton says, cautiously. "Here, you wanna see something cool?"
"Ten bucks says he gets his hand sliced off," Maya mutters.
"Cabroni ain't that stupid," Salvador whispers back, watching Axton start to reach for his back pocket.
Axton curses when Krieg's head whips up at his unfamiliar motions-- takes an alarmed step back when the Psycho snaps his buzz-axe back up and makes to throw it at him. "Jeez, stop, I'm not even--!" he snaps, holding his other arm out in a gesture of surrender. "Look, I'm getting money out, okay? You like money, right?"
Krieg growls at him, his weapon still raised.
"Twenty," Maya amends. "I bet you twenty."
"Thirty," Salvador says, out of the corner of his mouth.
"--No throwing!" Axton shrieks, his voice cracking as Krieg snarls and winds his arm up.
"...Thirty-five," Maya says. Salvador grins.
"Oh my god, do you think he'll have to get a cybernetic prosthetic like Hammerlock?" Gaige whispers a little too loudly, her eyes sparkling. "That would be so hot."
Zer0's helmet turns to focus on the teenager, the display flashing :V and WTFBRO in alternating patterns.
"Gaige!" Axton says. "Not helping!"
"I'll build it for you!"
"Really not helping !" he grits out, glancing at the hungry look in Krieg's eye and sweating a little bit-- for a couple more reasons than he should be, if he's being completely honest. "Money?" Axton asks, and waves a couple fives in his direction. "Money makes the pretty pictures spin."
Krieg's visible eye narrows menacingly-- suspiciously-- at the crumpled bills in Axton's outstretched hand.
"Like this," Axton says, and slowly, watching Krieg all the while, feeds the bills into the machine. "Okay? Now uh," he says, gesturing to the lever. "Pull it."
Krieg, to everyone's surprise, does so.
"--Note to self," Maya grumbles, folding her bills up and watching an ecstatic Krieg and Axton yell about landing triple Marcuses. "Stop betting against Salvador."
"But what if you win one-a these days?" Salvador teases, plucking it out of her fingers with surprising daintiness. Then he ruins the image by screaming, "OI, MOVE THE FUCK OVER, GUEYS!" and barrels his way into the Commando-Psycho party.
"Men are terrible," Maya mutters, her face planted into her palm.
Zer0 grunts in agreement.