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Summary:

Jason has been following and investigating (stalking) the new Superman for at least a month. He has his reasons, those being to prove he's an evil freak. Turns out 'Superman' is not the best at keeping his secret identity, well… secret.

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

Jason has been following and investigating (stalking) the new Superman for at least a month. He has his reasons, those being to prove he's an evil freak. Turns out 'Superman' is not the best at keeping his secret identity, well… secret.

Jason has been monitoring his flight patterns, and they all end up in a cheap apartment building. He sometimes forgets to wear his glasses. He's an idiot.

But what Jason is really shocked about is how disgustingly human this guy is.

He has the most regular job ever. He's a waiter at a hot pot restaurant.

Said hot pot restaurant is flashing 'Hot Pot!' in neon.

Jason had no expectations walking into the establishment in a bad brown wig and a fake ID in his pocket. This was all to see if that new Superman freak was an actual idiot, or this thing was just all a well crafted ruse.

Lo and behold, the first waiter to receive him is the man of steel himself.

"Hi! I'm CK!" He says brightly. Short for Clark Kent, uncreative. "I'll be your waiter tonight. Table for one?"

"Yeah."

CK smiles, pushing his glasses up his nose.

"Follow me."

He guides Jason to a small booth, hands him a menu, and takes out a notepad from his shirt pocket with a charming smile on his face.

"Sooo, what are we ordering?"

 


 

Jason is here to investigate, not to eat. He does get an order of rice, mushroom soup, shoulder steak, two orders of dumplings, a bottle of soju-

Prime, or waiter CK, comes over once more to get the hot pot and mushroom stock boiling.

"Okay! You'll give this a couple of minutes, and then you'll be able to cook your food in the soup."

"Thanks." Jason smiles, watching closely as Prime's cheeks turn a little pink. Interesting.

He comes back not too long after, carrying a tray with Jason's food with impeccable balance.

"Here you go!" He places it neatly on the table.

Jason grabs the silver tongs from the table and "accidentally" drops them in the boiling stew.

"Oops."

Prime is quick to put his tray down and roll back his sleeves.

"Oh, don't worry!" He says, and shoves his entire hand in boiling soup. "Here they are!" He chuckles until he notices the look on Jason's face and drops the very hot tongs.

"Ouch! Oh, that hurts so bad! Um, maybe don't use those until they cool down. My hand! Ouch…"

This guy sucks. He's a terrible actor. He's hiding his 'burnt hand' behind his back and smiling sheepishly.

"Oh god, should I call an ambulance?! That looked awful!"

"No!" Jason stares, confused as Prime babbles. "I mean, thank you, but that won't be necessary. I'm good, you know, stuff happens," He laughs awkwardly. "I'll be okay. Honestly. Don't worry." There's a very awkward silence. "Enjoy your food!"

And he's darting back to the kitchen.

 


 

Prime is back to take some of Jason's empty dishes. God knows why he didn't just ask another waiter to take over.

"Food was delicious, thank you," Jason says.

He purposely drops his chopsticks and watches as Prime catches them before they hit the ground… with his 'injured' hand (which he bandaged up messily), just as Jason predicted he would.

Prime watches Jason raise an eyebrow, and drops the chopsticks.

"Ouch…?"

Jason says nothing and starts patting himself as if looking for something.

"Huh, I can't seem to find my wallet."

Prime focuses his eyes for a second.

"Front left pocket."

Jason looks at him weirdly and does indeed pull his wallet from his front left pocket.

"You got X-ray vision?" he chuckles.

Clark's whole face turns beet red.

"Haha."

 


 

When he leaves, he finds Prime in the alley beside the restaurant, biting his fingernails.

"Hey."

'CK' jumps in place.

"Oh, uh, hello. Did you need anything? My shift is over-"

"How's your hand?" Jason asks

"Never had any complaints! Hehe. Um, no, yeah, it hurts. A lot."

"See, I don't think so," Jason says, moving in closer, taking Prime's 'hurt' hand in his own. "As far as I know, Superman doesn't get hurt."

"S-Superman? I'm not-"

Jason squeezes his hand, and Prime doesn't even flinch.

"Oh, stop it. You are terrible at this! You are Superboy Prime. I thought you were evil. What's this?!" He says, gesturing at him.

"I'm in my redemption arc! I mean-"

Jason chucks off his wig.

"You are terrible at this, god. How has no one found out?!"

Prime's eyes are huge.

"J-Jason Todd!?"

"I've been watching you. For months. Waiting for something, and you just-" Jason runs a hand through his hair, frustrated. "This is so boring!"

"You've been watching me for months…?" Prime looks incredibly smitten. Gross.

"Yes! Your flight patterns, everyone you talk to, which isn't much, to be fair; your schedules, your routines. Do you know you always wake up to pee exactly at 3:13? You can fly everywhere, but you still take the bus sometimes. You never tie your left shoe."

Prime looks down at his left shoe. It is, in fact, untied.

"That's so hot. You are so hot," Prime rambles, his hands twitchy and cheeks red.

Jason ignores him.

"Okay, um… What did I have for breakfast?!" Prime asks.

"That's a trick question; you don't eat breakfast."

Prime clutches at his chest like his heart is about to bounce right out.

"All you do is go to work and save Metropolis occasionally. You are so powerful but so… ordinary. Boring, even! You are supposed to be Superboy Prime, not some cute waiter!"

"You think I'm cute?"

"God, I hate you, I hate you, I-"

"Would you like to go out for dinner some day?"

Jason shakes his head in disbelief.

"What."

"D-doesn't have to be dinner! We can-"

"Are you asking me out on a date?!"

"Maybe." Prime looks very embarrassed.

Jason is furious. This guy is so dumb; he's so careless, he's so… so endearing. Jason's pupils threaten to become shiny pink hearts. Because Prime is giving him a severe case of… cuteness aggression? He looks like a scared puppy, staring up at Jason, waiting for an answer. His glasses are crooked, and his hair is messy. Jason hides his face behind his hands and groans.

"Sure."

He hears Prime go, 'Woohoo!' and all of a sudden the man is flying circles around him, excited.

"Oh my god, don't fly in public!"

 

Notes:

this fic is fully dedicated to the handsome waiter at that hot pot place i went to (i still think about him... i shouldve gotten his number..) sorry if this is a little ass and a little rushed :<
uhhh i think its funny to have prime be a little careless abt his secret identity and have jason be so confused abt why no one else can figure out he's superman (this same idea kinda made me wanna write them with a similar dynamic to lois and clark's in superman II (1983))
anyways woah!!! PHW IS OVER!!! so sadddd! im gonna have so much fun finally reading what everyone put out!!!!! SO EXCITED.
i hope you all enjoyed the 7 fics i put out... author is TIRED!!!!
this does mean ill finally turn my attention back to primehood yuri YAY?!
MUAKKK comments and kudos appreciated!!! go follow me on twt or tumblrif you want... <3
xoxo