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"Whew! That's one way to get back in gear after cycles of space travel!" Energon eater safely encapsulated and waiting outside the ship, Bumblebee heaved a great stretch, clicking joints back into place. Blades decided that after such a harrowing experience, he deserved to treat himself with an eyeful of flexing yellow doorwings and the curve of Bee's spine as he raised his arms.
"So now that you're back on Earth, you'll be going back to your own team right away, huh?" Blades asked, and tried not to sound petulant as he leaned back against a wall panel. Boulder had completed the repairs to Bumblebee's ship all too quickly, and now it was fueled up and ready to make the last leg of the journey. Nothing was left to do but load up the monstrous cargo and say goodbyes, when Bee had beckoned Blades into the ship for a private word. Blades practically vibrated in anticipation, despite insisting to himself they would probably just exchange comm numbers or something. In the past he'd let his hopes soar uncontrolled, but it was impressive how much Bee's extended leave of absence managed to dampen them. Now, though, old feelings were thrust back into the spotlight, making Blades's tanks churn with anxiety, not to mention emotion.
Bee did at least look regretful about heading off so soon. "Yeah, I really have to. I've been away long enough already. It's stressful just imagining what's gone wrong since I left those goofballs on their own. But at least this time we can keep in touch!"
"No more three-year radio silences?" Blades prodded, unable to quash the edge of bitterness even after all the declarations of friendship they'd shared throughout the day.
"Yeah, about that… I wanted to—apologize? Explain myself? Something like that. I mean I do want to apologize. I'm sorry. I should have gotten in touch way, way sooner. But there's more to it." Seeing Bumblebee shift his weight back and forth and suddenly avoid eye contact, Blades took his cue to straighten his posture and put on his listening face. It was so uncommon for Bee to offer any kind of emotional vulnerability, this must be something really important. And Blades would really like to know what kept one of his best friends from sending him even the briefest of notes for a span of years.
"Our last battle with Megatron… A lot of things happened. I know I never talked much about fighting the Decepticons. I didn't want you to worry about the dangerous things we got mixed up in all the time. I know you deal with dangerous situations too, but…it was really life-or-death. I guess that's war for you."
"I'm not a total stranger to war, y'know," Blades interjected softly. "I was still active when you—when Megatron…hurt you, and everyone was so amazed you lived through it. I wasn't on the front lines but I saw and heard things."
Bumblebee scratched at his helm. "Right, sorry. It's kind of hard to remember sometimes that you only missed part of the war. But in that last fight? Well—I'll spare you all the details for now, maybe I can send you all a debriefing later, but during the battle I kind of…died."
In the ensuing pause, Blades looked over Bee, blinked, squinted, and looked again. "You don't seem very dead."
The smile that cracked on Bee's face made Blades do an internal victory dance. "I was revived almost immediately. I fell into the Omega Lock—that's a, um, what we used to restore Cybertron's life force. Optimus said it had some kind of link to the Allspark? So I guess that might be why its energy brought me back. So I was only offline for maybe a minute or two, but it was…an experience."
"Wait, so you were really one hundred percent, for-real dead?" Blades's optics boggled. "That wasn't just an exaggeration?"
"Heh, no… I was really offline. It wasn't like losing consciousness or going into recharge. I can't really explain it, but I experienced…something. Even now I'm still trying to process it. I haven't talked about it with anyone yet, either… I've been avoiding it." Avoiding it like he was now avoiding Blades's eyes again. "I feel changed since then, somehow, in a way I can't describe. After I revived, I...killed Megatron, with a sword, so he was right there as he died, and after all that there was Optimus…going missing for a long time. Basically, a lot of things happened that left me feeling like I didn't even know myself anymore. And seeing you react to me being different was the last thing I felt up to dealing with. So I kept putting off getting in touch until it seemed like too big a prospect to face."
Blades gave Bee a good thorough look once again, this time not for comedic effect, and took in his downcast face, his pinched shoulders. It was almost unthinkable, but here was his hero admitting to anxiety, of all things. Nervousness about how he, Blades, would react to hearing his new voice, and learning about everything that had happened to him in the battle that ended the civil war. He would be laughing at the absurdity if it didn't also touch him to his very core. As many times as they'd saved each other's butts, this was the first time he could recall Bumblebee being so emotionally vulnerable in front of him. Seeing Bee twist himself in knots made him want to reach out and comfort him, support him, in a way he'd never gotten the chance to before.
"I'm sorry I got upset with you," Blades said, apparently surprising Bee, whose optics spiraled wide. "I did exactly what you were afraid I'd do. I should have trusted that you had a good reason."
Bee lurched forward and put a hand on Blades's shoulder, shaking the other rapidly side to side. "No no no, your reaction was justified! I should have trusted you better. But in my head I came up with much worse scenarios than this—I thought you would stop speaking to me, or even worse, keep interacting with me but just let our friendship drift away… I think that'd break my spark. Knowing now how much I missed you all this time…"
Blades swallowed down the excitement that bubbled up in his throat at those words. Bee liked him as a friend, the contact he was currently making with Blades's shoulder was just platonic, just looking for support, he wasn't about to confess to any romantic feelings—
"Blades, would you—" Bee floundered for a moment, tightening his grip on Blades's pauldron, and Blades swore his spark did a backflip in his chest. "Would you consider—Do you think we could be more than friends? Scrap, no, forget I said that, friends are good, I'm great with being friends—"
"Yes," Blades responded firmly, or at least as firmly as he could when his voice was cracking with sheer joy. Bumblebee looked at least as shocked as Blades was, staring up at him in stunned silence. Blades pulled him into a hug, like he had so many times before, but this time Bee leaned heavily on him as he gradually returned it. And for once, Blades could take his time to savor the feeling, the faint thrum of Bee's machinery pressed against him, the weight of his arms and the hot points of his hands on Blades's back. He pulled closer.
Bee seemed too surprised for words, and to be honest Blades was too, after literal years of stomping down the hope that his attraction would ever be reciprocated, so they both stood in silence for a time. Bee had started out stiff and twitchy, but he relaxed into the embrace as it sank in, resting his head on the shoulder he'd previously been gripping.
"That was also kind of the reason I put off contacting you," he said, barely a mumble though close enough to Blades's audials he could hear it fine. "I realized pretty early on I liked you, and having to talk to you without ever saying it was really hard. I was hoping time away would make me stop thinking about you that way…"
Blades gave a squeeze hard enough to produce an ‘oof' sound from Bumblebee. "I should be mad at you for not telling me…but I can honestly relate. I had the same problem. Well, that and every time I look at you I get so flustered I can barely form sentences."
"Nooo, now you're making me blush." Bee's face buried further into the crook of Blades's neck, making him giggle. "Wait." Abruptly he pulled back half an arm's length and looked Blades in the eyes. "Just to make sure, you really do want to, you know, date me? Like, you're romantically interested in me and this isn't about me being a hero or anything, right? Cuz I know you admire me and all, but I want us to be on equal footing here."
Blades cocked his head to the side and considered. Oh, sure, at first it had been hero worship, and Bumblebee was a very attractive mech to boot, but things had changed pretty quickly when they first met. Bee was so down-to-earth, willing to rely on others for help, and he genuinely thanked Blades for saving him. It was hard to put someone like Bee on a pedestal. While the fantasies of being swept off his feet by a dashing hero didn't stop, Blades found himself wanting to really cultivate a relationship with Bumblebee as well: to get to know him, his flaws, his fears, his weaknesses, and to be there for him, someone he could rely on and trust enough to let his guard down. He wanted to share their interests between them, learn about each other's pasts and the things most important to them. So, yes, "That's what I want, too."
The tension that had crept into Bee's frame released with a hiss. "Oh good. Great, actually." He shot Blades a grin, but began to fidget his hands together as the moment drew out. "So, I guess that's as official as it gets. We're dating now? I don't actually have a lot of experience with this, so I'm not sure if there's something we're supposed to do now…"
"Hmm, I may have some idea." Hands behind his back in a display of innocence, Blades smiled up at Bee from under hooded optics. "It's a human thing, but I've seen it done in movies a million times, and it seems like the right way to…consummate things?"
Bee gave him a blank look, so Blades charged ahead. He'd been daydreaming about this for so long, and here was his chance at last! "Lean down a little bit and tilt your head up. Yeah, like that. And I think our optics are supposed to be closed."
The kiss that ensued was pretty terrible, even as far as first kisses go. With his eyes closed, Blades missed Bee's mouth at first and had to readjust by touch alone. Inspired by the most romantic cinema Blades could recall, he pressed his mouth to Bee's firmly, and when that neither felt right nor elicited much of a response, he tried to make the requisite pleased sounds. Bee, for his part, did as he was told; namely, keeping his face in position, eyes closed and unmoving. Ultimately the kiss consisted of Blades mooshing his lower face against Bee's and saying ‘mm' in increasingly unconvinced tones. As a last ditch effort, he steadied himself with his hands on Bee's shoulders and lifted one foot behind him, and that did help add a little of the right mood to the scene. Finally, though, he had to admit this wasn't working, draw back and open his optics.
Bee blinked his own eyes open after a moment and quirked a wry smile. "I've heard about ‘kissing,' but I'm not sure that's how you're supposed to do it."
Blades bristled. "I told you I've seen it a million times! I know how kissing is done! I'm just…not very good at it, apparently."
"It probably takes a lot of practice," Bee reassured him, immediately softening his prickly mood. Blades still felt like he was probably missing a big part of the action of kissing, but the promise of more (and maybe better) attempts was heartening at least.
"So…if you plan on practicing with me, that means you'll be coming to visit more, right? And I can visit you, too?" As much as the idea of meeting new people gave Blades the jitters, he felt ready to take on just about anything if Bee was there with him.
"Absolutely. Visiting for fun reasons, this time. The humans on Griffin Rock know about Cybertronians, right? That opens up all kinds of date possibilities!"
Blades gasped. "Ooh, you're right! Let's see, there's the drive-in theater, the zoo… We could go on picnics… We have a karaoke machine back at the station! Oh oh oh—did I ever tell you about the time Optimus and I sang karaoke?"
