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Homura Akemi was walking by herself under the connecting hallway that opened out into the courtyard of Mitakihara Middle School. She pretended not to hear the heavy footfalls that carelessly traced her steps, the sharp inhale and smacking of lips. The rain was coming down over the city hard, choking the gutters in the road, enveloping the world in a wet, impermeable static. The girls in Homura’s class that had been watching her from the edge of the field for some time scurried into the safety of the nearest classroom. Homura turned to face Kyoko Sakura.
“The first signs of Walpurgisnacht,” the redhead said, gesturing to the rainfall and tossing the apple core into a plastic bag in one motion. “Right? It’s coming tomorrow, isn’t it?”
“Don’t you have someone you need to be watching closely?”
Kyoko seemed to laugh at the way Homura said that. “Who, Sayaka?” She stuck her hands in the pockets of her jacket and turned around. “She can take care of herself. She’s doing better, you know. Smiling more.”
“I don’t know, actually.”
“No, I suppose you don’t have time for the rest of us magical girls.” Homura winced, but Kyoko wasn’t looking at her. She turned profile to Homura, eyeing her curiously. “Hey, I guess I didn’t mean any of that. We have to stick together, after all, in order to defeat this thing. I actually came here to tell you thanks.”
“Thanks? What for?”
“It’s not from me, obviously. Sayaka is too proud. If it weren’t for you, well…”
The two of them looked out into the gray. The clouds had risen and corralled together, hints of lightning pulsing at their surface as the torrent continued in a soft hush. Homura smelled the imprint of water on leaves and soil. She had looked out into something similar on the day she was let out of the hospital. Her hand hovered over her heart. No, that time was past. She decided long ago that there were more important things than her health.
A purr of thunder. A faint gurgle of water on the roof like an afterthought.
She turned her head slightly and jumped a little. Kyoko was a lot closer than she thought, staring at her sidelong. She grinned at Homura briefly and turned her attention to the puddle forming inches away from her feet. “Even with all the things we’ve been finding out lately, about us turning into witches and losing our souls, you can’t help but feel peace looking out into all that, you know?” She shook her head as if to dismiss the silliness of her own words.
“I suppose.” After a pause, when Kyoko looked like she was about to reply, Homura said, “I think it’s all right to have a little hope for tomorrow.”
Kyoko watched her and wondered if she saw rain. No. There were tears on the girl’s face. Homura was crying, if only a little, though her expression was still set in that same, permanent indifference.
“We called that faith, growing up. That built up determination inside ourselves that meant invincibility. I used to laugh in the face the world, even at God. Despite all the shit I went through, I guess I still have that faith, or hope, or whatever you wanna call it.”
Kyoko let out a sigh. “After this insane witch business, maybe we can all take a little vacation. Maybe I’ll go to school here and you can show me around. Sayaka seemed especially keen on me attending. She didn't like the idea of me loitering around the area, looting liquor stores for a living. You know she offered me a place at her house?”
Kyoko smiled, looked back at Homura and saw in her eyes, what was it, pity? Sadness? She felt her spine turn cold. Homura quickly turned away. “Yes,” she said. “I think things will be all right after we defeat the Walpurgisnacht.”
Silence. The sky roared. A million dots of water accumulated on their clothes.
“Kyoko?”
“I’m listening.”
Kyoko felt a warm hand encircle her own, wrapping itself palm wise across, shaking slightly. She felt an urge to break the connection, but it passed. An irregular pulse beat against her thumb.
“This will seem out of character to you,” Homura said, her voice matching little of her current emotion, though still carrying some peculiarity, “but I am afraid. Afraid of what the future brings. I'm constantly running from the past, and the future gets closer and closer. I don't know what to do when it comes. Do you understand? Don't you see? I don’t really know anything.”
“No, that isn’t it. You’re really afraid you might lose someone.” Kyoko looked at her, then at her empty hand. “Someone close to you. And not the first time for a loss like that, either. But we're young. We're human. Right? Some part of us still is, at least.”
Homura tilted her head forward.
“I see. I figured you’d have baggage like that. You aren’t alone, at any rate. We all have something we’re afraid to lose. And some of us, we can’t take any more losses. We just can’t.”
They passed the time in silence, watching the fall of the rain, sloshing around and threatening to pull them under. A spout gushed water out into the pavement, wetting the tips of their shoes. They stepped back into further shelter, tightening the hold on each other’s hands. It wasn’t an empathetic or distant bond, but there was something desperate there, something important concealed in the smallness of their palms. A tiny fire.
“Hey, look,” Kyoko said, pointing at the sky. In the distance a ray of light had parted the clouds, illuminating part of the city. “Like that. What I mean is that it’s a kind of faith. A waiting game where we have to keep looking up, waiting for the light. And it’s not faith in our individual powers. It’s more like something that we have to have together. It’s something my dad used to say a lot.”
“What about hope?” Homura said, her voice coming out thin. Kyoko was leading her out into the wetness, just as the fall was slowing to a drizzle. They looked up and let the remnants of the storm pass them by with a damp rattling of wind, rather like curtains being pulled together in preparation for the final act, thought Homura.
“Yeah. That too. Hope. Lots of it.”
