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We had a history project at school once about the importance of the written word. How writing things down can be therapeutic and a way for people to be remembered long after they're gone, like Anne Frank. We had to keep our own diary for a month and then read out parts of it in class. You could tell we'd all made them up at the last minute but the teacher didn't seem to get it. She was one of those do-gooders that only sticks around for a term to say that she worked in a school with lots of minorities, like we're a box that needs ticking.
It's a good school though, Acland Burghley. We get all sorts of awards and top grades. Hard workers Peter's mum calls us. They still talk about him sometimes, in science class, the one that got away. Peter's doing all right, though I never say that to them. There's some things you share and some things you don't. That's why the fake diary.
But then that's also why the real one. Me and my best friend Tameka went to one of those fancy stationery stores and pooled our money to get a matching set of notebooks with butterflies on them. She went pink and I went purple. It didn't have a lock on it or anything but Tameka said if we got a sticker to put on the front and wrote TRIGONOMETRY on it nobody would bother looking at it. I followed her lead because I didn't want to have to say that no one I knew would be interested even if I'd written DIARY on it.
Peter's mum said once, when she didn't think I was listening, or maybe because she knew I was, that some kids just had to bring themselves up. Peter's mum's great, but she loves her husband more than she loves Peter.
That's why I like that Peter and Nightingale found each other.
On the day I found out that Peter and Nightingale had secretly been dating for a couple of months I wrote in my diary, just like I have for nearly every day since that history class. One day I'll get it published and it can sit alongside all the other books in the Folly's library.
It'll need a lot of editing though. There's some stuff that shouldn't ever be made public.
P&N lied about dating. N thought I might be worried about it. More worried he won't treat P right. Not like he's had much practice. Never asked him how long it's been since he had a boyfriend, don't want to know! But Molly said he was very lonely for a very long time. P been lonely too, just hides it better.
Good for N to have someone to worry about that isn't me.
Nightingale's a big fan of practice and repetition, and that's why we get on so well, because I like that too. I kept up my diary long after Tameka got bored of hers, though I've not told her that. It means I can't take it to school with me, but I keep it on a bookshelf next to the orchid Nightingale gave me for my birthday. It's beautiful and I love seeing it when I wake up in the morning.
On my birthday he asked me if I wanted to do something special and I said we should order a take away and give Molly a night off from cooking and go sit in the Tech Cave watching Disney movies. He agreed, even though I don't think he knew what Disney movies were. There's so much stuff he doesn't know it'd be embarrassing if there weren't all this stuff he does know, just rattling around in his head.
He's a man with secrets, my Dad had said. After they'd first met. I wrote about it in my diary but then I scribbled over that page with black marker because I didn't want to remember it. Dad called Nightingale some names and accused him of wanting to pimp me out. Nightingale's a copper though, sometimes before a wizard, sometimes a wizard before a copper, and he didn't react like my dad expected.
Nightingale's good like that.
Dad's never hit me, but sometimes his words cut me open. Nightingale's never so much as raised his voice.
When I first saw him I thought like my dad did though.
Posh bloke asked me what I was doing tonight. Ghost hunting I told him. He smiled and asked me my name. Told him to move on cause I weren't interested. His name is Nicholas Wallpenny the man told me. Not the man's name, the ghost's name. Posh bloke didn't tell me his name. Thought he was going to ask me how much I charge. Tameka told some bloke 50 quid once and he handed it over and she did a runner. But posh bloke just told me to be careful and stay near the crowds.
I wanted to tell him that my cousin Peter's a policeman and he's only round the corner but, I didn't. I didn't want Peter to know I'd met a ghost.
Ghosts are real.
I keep writing it down but it don't make any more sense now than it did when I was out there.
Posh bloke kept an eye on me but the ghost didn't come back. Think posh bloke scared him off.
What kind of person scares off a ghost?
Wizards it turns out, scare ghosts. The posh bloke to end all posh blokes turned out to be Detective Chief Inspector Thomas Nightingale and he's a copper and a wizard.
I asked him once if it was because he was a wizard that I trusted him right off, and he got this weird look on his face and said that wasn't anything to do with magic. I didn't tell him he smelt of pine and canvas, not till later. And by then I knew all about Ettersberg.
Because I get to be a wizard too.
N asked me to tell him about the ghost today. I'd gone back to CG to look for him again but found N instead. He asked if it was all right if he bought me a drink. I don't think he knows how to act around girls. Or maybe it's just a posh thing.I said okay anyway and we went to one of those really naff places in Leicester Sq that only tourists go to. You can spot a tourist right off, especially an American one. They all think they could buy London if only we'd ask them. Wouldn't last five minutes on my estate.
I didn't say this to N though. Don't think he'd know what I meant.
He seems old. I asked him how he old he was and he asked me how old did I think he was. I said that means you're a lot older than you look, if you're asking that. He said that was very true.
I wonder if magic makes you look young?
He didn't seem bothered about the question though. I hate it when adults look at you like you shouldn't be asking questions, like they have all the answers. I asked N, do you know everything? And he looked confused, which means he doesn't mind not knowing everything. I like that in an adult.
Peter wants to be a wizard. He doesn't say as much, not to me, but I see the way he watches when Nightingale's teaching me a new spell. I daren't ask whether he's practising them in private, because I think Nightingale's very deliberately not asking that question too.
Peter hates his job. He doesn't say anything about it to me but sometimes when he comes home he's dead tired and barely able to step through the front door and Nightingale finds him and pulls him into a hug. I don't think Peter gets hugged enough.
Not that I'm volunteering. That would just be weird.
Still can't find the CG ghost again. But N keeps turning up. Getting a bit weird.He bought me a cup of tea in this posh cafe place. Peter was walking by and I tried to turn my head away so he wouldn't see but he clocked me right away. Thought I was going to get a bollocking but N showed Peter his warrant card and asked him to join us.
I could tell P thought it was weird. It is weird. I think it's weird. But I think it's sort of right too.
N told P the same as he'd told me, about the Folly and wizards. P looked like he thought it was weird but sort of right too.
Knew I liked P best.
Dad didn't want Nightingale to teach me anything. He still doesn't. The third time Nightingale finally got through enough of his prepared speech to tell my dad about magic, Dad said there was no such thing and he shouldn't be filling a stupid girl's head full of nonsense.
That was the first time I'd ever seen Nightingale mad at my dad. These days he doesn't bother because he knows better, but back then he didn't.
Dad and N had a big row about me today. Dad sent me to my room and I didn't go until N nodded that it was okay, so D got even madder. Normally I hate it when Dad gets in one of his moods in front of people, but somehow I didn't think N would hold it against me like some of the neighbours do. Like if only I were a better daughter he wouldn't have to get angry.Peter's mum's said that to me once and I called her a name Tameka's step-dad called her mum when she got so drunk she lost her job at the Co-op. Peter's mum's a lot scarier when she's angry than N is.
Peter's mum insisted on meeting Nightingale. I didn't know what was going to happen and I still don't know what was said, they wouldn't let me stay in the room. But she came out afterwards and said “you study hard and you'll be all right”, so I knew it was okay.
She's always had a bit of a soft spot for Nightingale. I think it's cause he's got old fashioned manners. But then Peter has a bit of that too. Not quite the same, but they're always treating others like they'd want to be treated, even when they're evil cows like Lesley May.
Mrs G gave ok for N to start teaching me. Only weekends though cause I've still got school. N didn't say as much but I think he's got a plan. He had all these Ofsted reports and policies and procedures and stuff hidden in his desk that he didn't think I'd seen.
Normally, back in the olden days, loads of wizards would have lived at the Folly. They were all taught at this special wizarding school, like Hogwarts though. Only N doesn't like it when me and P call it that. I found a copy of all the HP books in a box in the old coach house though so I know he's read them.
He's definitely a Gryffindor.
Peter insisted on having a “serious conversation” with me once, in the beginning. He wanted to know that I was all right with Nightingale. I asked him if he was and he looked confused. Peter can be so oblivious sometimes.
I said of course I was all right with it. Magic was real. Peter looked so happy I almost hugged him. There was this whole new world out there, right next to the one we'd always known about and suddenly we were some of the chosen ones.
I think that's what my dad's always had a problem with. Not that Nightingale's a posh white bloke but that he had all this knowledge about the world that my dad didn't, and now I've got it too. Dad would rather everyone stick to what their best at. God knows what he thinks I'd be best at but I know that this was the most important decision I've ever made. I knew it back then too.
N explained about wizarding oaths today. That they weren't just promises. That the worst thing you could be called in the magic world was an oath-breaker. He didn't ask me to take my oath though, just gave me a book about it and told me to take my time reading it.
P was there when N was talking too, because N suggested I have a chaperone and P volunteered. Chaperone is such an old fashioned word but I kind of like it too. You can tell that was N's idea because it fits him. When he does something that's P's idea, like clearing out some of the old rooms in the Folly so I have my own work desk you can tell it's P's idea because it feels like P.
P keeps catching himself forgetting to be critical of N, like he's supposed to report back to my Dad and everybody but he likes N and thinks that this might work out all right.
P is definitely a Ravenclaw.
I think Molly was more excited about me coming to the Folly regularly than Nightingale was. I can't imagine what it must have been like for her before, with nothing but men and then nothing but Nightingale. Not that I think she's ever had to worry about Nightingale, but I've seen the way posh blokes look at cleaners and stuff. Not that I think Molly couldn't defend herself if she had to, no question, but I think she quite likes that she doesn't have to ever worry about it while she's in the Folly. Not with Nightingale, not with me, not with Peter.
I think she likes having a girl in the house. It's not like we can have girly chats, though I sort of know what she's trying to say without really knowing. Nightingale said some people just have that ability and smiled. Only he wasn't smiling at me as he said it, he was looking over to where Peter was talking to Molly about something, and smiling at Peter.
He'd looked sad after, as he'd turned away to make sure that Peter didn't see him looking. Molly and Nightingale had only each for so long, I don't think Nightingale really believed he'd ever find someone who might fit in with them again.
Then he met me and Peter.
It's my second weekend at the Folly. P's downstairs talking to N. I said I wanted to go freshen up, cause that's the sort of thing N says and headed up to the room M and N had told me was all mine. Even if it wasn't my usual day for coming over. It's like they think I run away from home a lot!
When I got there there was a bag on the bed and inside were a box of tampons and a packet of sanitary pads. For a really weird moment I thought that N might have left them there, which made for a very funny image. I can't see him in Boots asking the shop assistant about different brands.
Of course it was M who'd left them for me. I don't know how she knew I'd be needing them today and I thought it would be rude to ask. So I just did what I had to in my bathroom. N says they chose this room for me because it had its own bathroom. He has his own too. I don't think he'd know what to do with a woman if he saw her in a nightdress, which is what all the posh people wear. I prefer a t-shirt and jogging bottoms and I'm not allowed to wear them at breakfast. When I came out on the bedside table was a glass of water and two paracetamol. I never hear M coming and going but she must have left them. I don't think she'd have told N. I'm not sure he even knows what periods are. So I just took them and drank all the water down.
It's not a bad month this time but I'm going to have to have a talk to N about it at some point. There are going to be days when I really can't do anything except hug a hot water bottle.
It's one of those times I wish there were more women wizards. N says they never taught them at his school so it was all boys. But I bet you they were learning anyway.
When I'm a bit older and he lets me use the library without supervision, I'm going to do my own research and track them down. There must be papers he's never gone through, he's practically said as much. Which means there's all sorts of history he's never bothered to learn because he's never realised there's a need for it.
I'm really starting to like N but he can be pretty oblivious sometimes.
The very first spell I learnt how to do is called Lux. That's Latin for light and it's literally that, a light that you can float in your hand or move to attach to a wall if there's no electricity – though moving it around's a lot trickier than you'd think.
Peter wasn't my official chaperone then but Nightingale had invited him to watch anyway. We were at the Folly, down in one of the science labs. It didn't occur to me till later that he was testing Peter as much as he was me, but as our headteacher always used to say, “hindsight's a glorious invention”.
Anyway, Nightingale opened his hand and a perfect circle of light was bobbing just above his palm. He let me touch it and whispered a few more words; each time he did the shape changed or it got hotter then colder and the colour changed too. I stared at it so much my eyes started to water and get all blurry.
“I want you to try next,” he'd said to me and I'd nodded and told him to show me again. This time when he did I listened hard. Nightingale said it wasn't just the words that were important but the shape the magic made inside your mind. It was just like building with Lego, you had to build a good foundation before you could get all the fancy bits on top.
Except of course when I tried nothing happened. I expected Nightingale to be disappointed, but instead he was smiling.
“Anyone can do magic,” he said. “As long as you have someone to show you how and you're willing to work at it. It takes practice and dedication, and ten years of training before you become fully qualified. It won't be easy.”
“I want to try,” I said. And I did. Because there was no going back, not now.
“Then keep practising, but no more than a few hours a day.”
That's when he explained to me and Peter exactly what happens to your brain on magic. That didn't put me off either.
While I was doing all that secret practising though Nightingale had been working to get me time away from school and meeting with Ofsted and all sorts of stuff I didn't appreciate at the time. I did know though that he really wanted this to work and he didn't worry for a second that I wouldn't be able to do magic. I did though.
I tried to talk to Peter about it once, before I'd cracked it, but then changed the subject. He was still upset about being stuck at the CPU while Lesley May was on some big murder case. He'd told her about magic, though I don't think Nightingale knew that at first, and she'd been pretty dismissive of it. But then she was always that way with Peter and I don't know why he put up with it. I'd have told Tameka where to go a long time ago if she treated me like Lesley treated Peter.
Anyway. I did it. Which meant Nightingale wasn't pulling some weird scam on me, he was telling the truth. Anyone could be a wizard. And he'd chosen me.
Did my first spell today.
DID MY FIRST SPELL TODAY.
Nearly screamed the Folly down I was that excited. M came running first and then burst into giggles when I showed her. N wasn't far behind and he gave me this brilliant smile and he looked years younger. P stood in the doorway too, with this big beaming smile and then he came forward and lifted me up into a hug and twirled me around. I let him because I was that excited but I told him if he ever did it again I'd break both his kneecaps.
I'm going to be a wizard.
Nightingale, even more so in the beginning, was very careful to keep details of his police investigations away from me. Sometimes when there were interesting spells he'd had to do he'd tell me about them – that's why I learnt what a demon trap was long before I'd seen one for myself – but mostly he kept all that away from me.
He and Peter would talk about it sometimes, long before they were sleeping together. Nightingale had spent a lot of time by himself so I think he liked that he could talk to Peter about the magic part of his cases without having to use fancy words and outright lying. I think as a rule Nightingale's actually a very truthful person; he'll lie by omission quite a lot but if you ask him a direct question he'll always give you a proper answer.
I didn't really pay much attention to them back then, I was too busy studying. But it sort of fit, when I knew and when I realised they were going to be more than friends. I mostly didn't mind, Nightingale never cancelled a lesson for Peter, only for a murder case, which I thought even then was fair enough. They did have a few arguments in the beginning and I worried for a while that it was just going to be like home again, but they sorted themselves out.
I'm glad they've got each other. Though it's still weird.
N and P had secret meeting tonight. M let me listen in for a bit before she moved me upstairs. They were talking about me, obviously. About dad too and maybe me moving into the Folly instead of only coming over during the day or after school.If they'd have asked me I'd have told them that the Folly already felt like home, even if I wasn't living there yet. But they didn't.
I wished they would but I know N doesn't want my dad to be angry with me and P has his mum to deal with. Everyone's looking out for me without asking me what I want. It's kind of annoying.
I hate Lesley May.
Peter doesn't. Even though she keeps trying to kill him.
Nightingale doesn't, though I think that's more to do with him going all moral high ground about her.
But I do. When I was 15 she and her psycho friends tried to kill me. It wasn't about me. I knew that even then. It was about getting at Nightingale. They didn't want him to have an apprentice because they wanted the Folly to be finished.
Nightingale had taught me this cool spell though, a shield, though he's given up telling us not to call it that. So I just concentrated on that the whole time, knowing that Nightingale would come for me. And he did.
Afterwards, once we'd gone to check-up on Peter and we were sat in the kitchen having hot chocolate with Molly Nightingale said we needed to talk.
“I'm not stopping,” I'd said to him before he had a chance to say anything. “I'm going to be a wizard.”
“It's getting too dangerous...”
“You can't protect everyone on your own,” I interrupted. “And I'm not going to let you.”
Nightingale looked like he was going to argue for a minute and then he looked over at Molly and they had one of their silent conversations. I don't know how I can know what Molly's saying one minute but then have no idea the next.
“Did you hear what Peter said, about Lesley?”
“That's she's a two faced cow?” I asked.
Nightingale's eyes twitched. “About her magic.”
“She lied about it,” I said. Nightingale tilted his head and waited for me to continue. “She might have been possessed at Covent Garden, but that wouldn't have given her magic, magic doesn't work like that. You have to learn magic. You have to practice it. The only way she could have magic is because she went out and decided that she wanted to know it. She knew exactly what she was doing.”
“Yes,” Nightingale agreed, “they had to have been planning this attack for quite some time. She had plenty of opportunities to come forward and she ignored all of them. She must have known Peter would have helped her.”
That last bit he'd said to himself. I wouldn't have wanted to be Lesley if Nightingale caught up with her just then.
“So what's she really after, then?”
Nightingale blinked back to himself. “I'm not sure. She talked about wanting to destroy not only the Folly but the wider magical community as well. Which suggests to me that she doesn't really understand what she's up against. This, Faceless Man, if we must call him that, was clearly able to teach her magic but I don't think he understands the delicate balance of the demi-monde. That will be to our advantage.”
I didn't point out then, though I would later, that there was a lot about the demi-monde he didn't know himself.
Peter calls it engaging with the community and Nightingale wasn't as good as it then as he's got since. Now people in the demi-monde are actually pleased to see him, but it took a lot of hard work from him and Peter, and yeah, me too, to get us there.
The other apprentices were a big help too. But that's another story.