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The Team Prime base never offered much privacy for any of the members, especially on eventful days where everyone is in such high tensions. Today was one of those days, except it was probably one of the most exciting for the team- tomorrow, they were going to venture back to Cybertron and begin reconstruction. Items had to be packed, groups organized, lists checked and double-checked, assignments had to be sent out… It seemed never ending, and for Smokescreen, all the work was a tad bit overwhelming. Everyone was running around, but in all honesty, he just wanted to just sit down and collect his thoughts.
Of course Smokescreen was thrilled- ecstatic, even- to return to Cybertron. Compared to the other ‘bots, he hadn’t been away an extremely long time, but the excitement was enough to cloud his thoughts and bubble out of him. The best idea to him seemed to just sneak out for a short drive when no one was looking his way. Driving always cleared Smokescreen’s mind, which would probably benefit the group more than if he was running around confusedly.
As Ratchet ordered the majority of the Autobots to fill boxes, Smokescreen took the opportunity to transform and quickly speed to the outside Nevada desert. The moon was only a sliver in the sky, but the stars shined brightly without the light-pollution of large cities. After a few quick miles, Smokescreen pulled off the road to find a secluded area. It only took another short moment to find a large pile of rocks that couldn’t be seen from the road. Sighing, he transformed into his robot mode, stretching his arms up high.
Smokescreen gazed up at the stars in wonderment. They had never looked important, but the contrast from Cybertron’s sky was so vast. It was just stars, yet it brought a plethora of feelings. He sat down with his back against the rocks while trying to ignore the slight discomfort from his door wings pressing against bare stone. As he looked up at those foreign stars, emotions burst out. Everything up to now had been so stressful- training for the elite guard, getting a shitty position, being unconscious in a pod, war, earth. Everything. And now, it was finally hitting Smokescreen.
Maybe it was finally over.
Maybe now Smokescreen could be the great leader he wanted to be, but minus the stresses of war. Plus, even though Cybertron would be different from the one he knew, at least he was returning home. Tears started forming in his optics, making the stars look like blurry specs instead of specific dots of lights. An opposing thought suddenly came to Smokescreen: Earth had a similar feel to “home”. Team Prime was a family, and even though it had been moved multiple times, the base was similar to a house. Even the humans were included in that family.
To his disbelief, tears poured over, and Smokescreen started sobbing. As much as he missed Cybertron, he’d miss Earth, too. He could always visit, but it wouldn’t be the same. It was like losing a home all over again. “Get a hold of yourself, Smokescreen.” He mumbled to only himself and the rocks, choking back a loud sob. He looked back up at the clear sky while attempting to stop weeping.
A sudden dull hum of an approaching car made him jump. Out here, Smokescreen didn’t expect any humans to drive this distance into the desert. He peeked around the corner, but was even more surprised when the familiar black and yellow sports car was making its way towards his hiding spot. Quickly, Smokescreen scrambled to his feet, wiping away tears despite still being teary eyed. It might have been slightly embarrassing to be found sobbing under the stars like a sparkling.
Bumblebee transformed as he drove nearer with a slightly irritated expression. Uh oh. Back at the base, there was probably a job waiting for Smokescreen to complete, except he clearly had been found to not be there. The thought of having to go through boxes or organize supplies or feel the humans staring sadly or, or- the piling list of jobs went on, and Smokescreen’s optics started watering again.
“What’s up, Bee?” He managed to get out, waving to the other. Playing it cool was key; he didn’t want Bumblebee to worry on top of preparations. Bumblebee often lent him an ear to troubles, even edging on territory of maybe more than friends. Except, now wasn’t the right time to start babbling about his problems. There were more important things to be done, and realistically, it hadn’t been a very smart idea to suddenly drive away unannounced.
As soon as Smokescreen spoke, Bumblebee’s expression softened. The two had spent a lot of time together, and he had learned the minute variations of Smokescreen’s tone of voice that gave away his sadness. “Ratchet sent me to get you back to base.” Bumblebee took a few steps forward, laying a servo on the other ‘bot’s arm gently. “Smokey, are you okay?”
“Feelin’ swell.” Except, Smokescreen was clearly not swell. The simple concerning question only caused him to start tearing up again, and his voice cracked at the very end. He reached up to his optics quickly to wipe away any further tears. Awkwardly, he looked down at the ground in hopes that Bumblebee wouldn’t notice.
Without a word, Bee led him back to sitting behind the pile of rocks with little resistance. They sat inches from each other, Smokescreen still looking at the ground, and Bumblebee worriedly staring at the other’s face.
It was Bumblebee who finally broke the silence. “What’s going on?” Again, he laid a servo on Smokey’s arm, intending to comfort him. “It’s unlike you to be so quiet.”
Smokescreen’s spark started pulsing faster in a strange feeling of fondness and sorrow. It had only been a short time since Bumblebee had gotten his voice back but it constantly caused Smokescreen to focus intently on it. While the beeping had been a cool trait, a voice was much more comforting. However, at the same time he was still sad and overwhelmed from his previous thoughts about returning to Cybertron.
“It- it’s just so…” Smokescreen began trying to articulate his fears, but a sob stopped him from continuing. He suddenly burst into tears and buried his face in Bumblebee’s chest, hugging him tightly.
They sat there for a few minutes- Smokescreen sobbing with a few incoherent words and Bumblebee wrapping his arms around him with soothing phrases. At this point, Smokescreen didn’t care if he seemed like a sparkling. Everything was so stressful, and Bumblebee’s comfort was much appreciated.
By the time Smokescreen stopped crying, his face was a mess. Bumblebee reached up, wiping away tears from his face plate.
Once Smokescreen began talking again, he remained curled up in Bumblebee’s arms. “We’re finally going back to Cybertron.” He grabbed one of Bumblebee’s servos while he whispered. “But I’m going to miss Earth too, y’know? The humans, all the other organics, they’re so different from our planet. And here, on Team Prime, I’m really a part of something- back on Cybertron I was just assigned to the Hall of Records.”
Inadequacy was rarely brought up in their conversations. More often than not, Smokescreen tried to go around the topic by insisting eventually he would do something grand. Bumblebee angled the other’s face upwards so they could look each other in the optics. “But, Smokey, those are pretty great things to do! Not everyone makes it to the Elite Guard. And besides,” he smiled before kissing Smokescreen’s forehead, “you’re more than enough for me.”
Energon flushed Smokescreen’s face plate. Leadership roles and high ranking positions had always been his focus on being important, but the thought of being important to someone else individually was new. He always attempted to make Optimus proud, but that was more because that was his role model, and everyone wants that achievement. With Bumblebee, it had a differing reason behind it. Smokescreen wished to be someone Bumblebee cared for on a higher level than just comrades.
Since Smokescreen seemed to be at a loss for words, Bumblebee continued talking in a low voice. “You made it to the Cybertron Elite Guard,” he placed another kiss on Smokey’s face plate, “You protected Alpha Trion, and he trusted you with an omega key. You stopped Starscream in the Apex armor all by yourself. You escaped the Nemesis all on your own. You’ve even saved Optimus’s life twice.” He continued listing Smokescreen’s achievements accompanied by a lower kiss until he got to the other’s mouth.
With each kiss, Smokescreen grew more and more relieved. It felt nice to be so warm, hearing his successes listed out to him and receiving affection. The final kiss was only a quick, innocent action that still managed to make him feel giddy. A smile spread across Smokescreen’s face plate as he looked at Bumblebee. He gave a kiss back for a short moment before untangling himself from Bumblebee’s frame and standing.
Smokescreen helped the black and yellow bot to his feet. “Thanks, Bee. I really appreciate it.” He gave the other another tight hug while talking. “But we better get back before Ratchet comes out here and offlines us for being gone so long.”
The two transformed and navigated back to the road. It didn’t take long for the sports cars to return to base where everyone was still getting ready for the return to Cybertron. Ratchet happened to see them first, and with a burst of annoyance sent them back to doing work. At least now it was manageable for Smokescreen.