Chapter Text
“How much time do I have left…until I lose all my human emotions and feelings? When I stop…being human all together…?”
“At this rate…less than a year.”
“…Dammit…”, Mika murmured into the darkness for what felt like the hundred time as he leaned against the wall, sitting on the large bed he and Yuu were sharing while all of them were spending the night in Ferid’s mansion.
While Yuu was already fast asleep on his side of the bed, covered with the blanket, Mika was lost deep in his thoughts, thinking about his conversation with Crowley from earlier.
So, less than a year, huh? Before I’ll…fully become one of them…with the only thing that still matters to me…will be the thirst for blood. Before…I’m really no more than a bloodsucking monster…
“Dammit.”, Mika said once more in a little bit louder voice.
Suddenly he heard the sheets beside him shifting, followed by a sleepy sounding voice.
“…Mika?”, Yuu asked, sitting up and rubbing his eyes, “Is something the matter?”, he wanted to know, looking at him with a sleepy gaze.
“Yuu-Chan.”, Mika said, slightly caught off guard by hearing the voice of his friend before he tried to flash him an assuring smile, saying, “N-no, everything’s alright. I…just talked to myself. Sorry, if I woke you up. You… can go back to sleep, okay?”, he added, averting his gaze.
“…”
Looking at him for a short moment, seeing his sad expression and that thoughtful look in his eyes, Yuu gave a sigh of exasperation before he crawled out under the blanket and moved closer to him.
“Mika.”, he said, sitting now right beside him, “You know you can’t lie to me, so what’s wrong?”
“…It’s nothing, really…”, Mika replied in a quiet voice, without looking at him.
“You don’t really expect me to believe that, do you? I always know when something’s bothering you, you can’t fool me. And besides, you’ve been acting strange the whole evening already, so no excuses.”
“…”
Not getting a response from him, Yuu asked with a serious expression:
“…Do you need blood?”
“No, I…I’m fine. I…can last without it a little while longer.”, he replied with a sad smile, knowing how persistent Yuu could be if he wouldn’t assure him that he’s perfectly fine at that moment.
“What is it, then?”, Yuu wanted to know but neither did he get an answer nor did Mika look at him even once.
“…Is it because of what you’ve talked with Crowley about earlier?”, he asked, earning a look of surprise from Mika as a response.
“Bingo, huh?”, Yuu said with a small laugh as he saw his expression, knowing he was right with his assumption.
Without replying anything, Mika nervously bit his lip and looked away once again, hoping he wouldn’t ask any further but to no avail.
“What did you talk about with him?”, Yuu continued his questioning, “It wasn’t just small talk, am I right? Otherwise you…wouldn’t had looked so sad after that.”
“…”
Bending a little bit forward, shifting himself into Mika’s field of vision, Yuu flashed him a warm smile and asked in a soft voice:
“Won’t you tell me what’s wrong?”
Mika looked into his bright emerald eyes at for a few seconds, knowing he couldn’t say no to him when he was smiling like that.
“…I…”, Mika began hesitantly, averting his gaze from him before trailing off, searching for the right words to say while Yuu leaned back again and patiently waited.
“…My…humanity is slowly vanishing…”, he finally admitted after a while of silence.
“Huh?”, Yuu asked in confusion, “What…do you mean with that?”
“Lately I…noticed, that my feelings are becoming dull.”, Mika began to explain after taking a deep breath and bringing his knees to his chest, “That they’re…disappearing one by one and that at a rapid speed.”
While he spoke, Yuu just silently listened to him, not taking his eyes from him even once.
“That happens to every vampire sooner or later.”, Mika carried on, “Bit by bit…they’re losing every single one of their emotions…until all they have left and care about is their thirst for blood, nothing else.”
“…”
“…I’ve…asked Crowley how much time I have left until I…also become like that..."
“…And?”, Yuu asked hesitantly, seeing how difficult it must have been for Mika to tell him all these things.
“…Less than a year.”, he admitted in a barely audible voice.
Hearing that, Yuu only looked at him in shock but before he could say anything to that, Mika continued:
“In less than a year I’ll…be just a vampire like every other one. Not caring about anything, except for blood. Seeing every human just as merely livestock…maybe even you. Maybe…it would be better if I-”
“Don’t say it.”, Yuu cut him off, knowing perfectly well what he was about to say and making Mika look at him again, “Mika, I won’t let that happen and I definitely won’t abandon you. You’re my family, no matter what.”, he said in determination.
“…Even if I’ll become a completely different person? Even if…there will be nothing left of me someday? If…the ‘me’ you once knew just…disappears?”, Mika asked in a quiet voice and with a sad smile.
“That won’t happen.”, Yuu said with a serious expression, “I promised you, after all, didn’t I? That I’ll turn you back into human. And I don’t intend to break that promise.”
“It’s easier said than done, you know?”, he replied with a small laugh, looking away from him again, “I’ve…never heard about a possibility to turn a vampire back, after all…”
“Then I’ll find one!”, Yuu objected, “You know me, I never give up, no matter what. And no matter how many time it takes I’ll-”
“Yuu-Chan.”, Mika suddenly cut him off, “…I’m dying.”, he said in an almost cracking voice while clutching at his chest, the spot where his heart was supposed to be beating, “I’m dying inside.”
“…”
“My emotions are being snatched away from me bit by bit…Even if there is a way…there’s no guarantee that they’ll ever return…That being a vampire won’t leave any marks on me…That I’ll ever be fully human again.” , Mika said in a barely audible voice.
Yuu looked at him in silence for a short moment before he flashed him an assuring smile and moved a little bit closer to him so that their shoulders were slightly touching and said:
“Mika.”
“Hm?”, Mika replied, shifting his gaze back to him again.
Yuu opened his mouth, about to say something but as soon as he saw his expression, he closed it again while his smile slowly disappeared.
He had never seen Mika that sad, that utterly broken before, like he did in that moment…and he knew that no matter what he would say to him, no amount of his shallow words would suffice to make him feel better or to make him forget all these things for a little while.
Pondering about what else he could do, Yuu gazed deeply into his crimson eyes for a short moment in silence, noticing that he never had looked at them that intensely before since they’ve changed colour…and without giving a second thought to his action, he leaned in, placing a quick peck on Mika’s lips and pulled back again.
Any reaction would have sufficed in that moment. Even if Mika would had got angry and had yelled at him for doing that. Anything…just not that sad expression.
But he didn’t get angry or did he yell at him. Instead, Mika just looked at him in slight surprise for a few seconds.
“…What was that for?”, he asked with a small laugh and a flustered smile on his face.
“Just…wanted to cheer you up…”, Yuu replied, a faint blush beginning to cover his cheeks.
“With a kiss?”, Mika wanted to know, visibly not angry at all and with amusement in his voice.
“Thought it…could distract you a little bit…”
As he heard that, Mika’s smile widened a little bit, turning into a warm one shortly after, before he closed his eyes and leaned in, resting his forehead slightly against Yuu’s.
“You’re so weird…”, he said in a quiet voice, “The weirdest person I’ve ever met.”
Yuu just stared at him in silence, too occupied to look at that warm smile of him he hadn’t seen for quite a while to be able to say anything.
“Hey…”, Mika said after a little while, slowly opening his eyes again, “Would you mind to…do that again?”, he asked hesitantly, looking into his emerald eyes.
Without replying anything, Yuu just flashed him a tiny smile before he pulled back a little bit and placed another peck on his lips that also lasted only for a brief second before he pulled back again and looked at him, waiting for a reaction.
“…Again?”, Mika asked, still with a smile.
As a response another peck was planted on his lips, also not lasting longer than a second.
“Again?”, he asked once more in a little bit quieter voice.
Hesitating for a short moment, Yuu pressed their lips together for the third time, this time a few seconds longer than the last and when he pulled back again, he only pulled back enough so that their faces were still only inches apart from another.
“…Again…”, Mika begged in a whispering voice, his eyes still closed from the previous kiss.
Feeling his warm breath against his skin, Yuu felt how his face was slightly heating up in that moment and his heart gaining unusual speed but still…he didn’t back away and brought their lips together once again in a chaste kiss.
His lips lingered on Mika’s a little while longer than the last time…until he suddenly could feel something wet on his own face. As Yuu opened his eyes again…he saw that tears were slowly streaming down Mika’s face.
Startled by that unexpected reaction, Yuu quickly broke the kiss and pulled back, looking at him in shock.
“I-I’m sorry, Mika. I-I didn’t mean to- shit. I-I’m sorry, okay?”, he apologized, fearing he was the cause for that sudden outburst.
But Mika didn’t answer him. All he did was sobbing and shaking with his eyes still closed while more and more tears rolled down his flushed cheeks. Yuu looked at him in silence for a few seconds, unsure what to do in that moment, before he carefully placed his hand on one of Mika’s shoulders, saying in a soft voice:
“…Mika…please don’t cry…”
Hearing him saying his name, Mika opened his eyes again and their gazes met.
As they both looked at each other, Yuu saw how his crimson eyes were shimmering with several emotions. A mix of sadness, despair and fear…and also something he couldn’t quite grasp what it was at first but still…it was captivating him, enough to trigger something in him and suddenly…everything seemed to move in slow-motion as he found himself closing his eyes and hesitantly leaning in again, brushing his lips ever so slightly against Mika’s trembling ones, wanting to give him the opportunity to push him away any time…but he didn’t.
Mika only looked at him through half-lidded eyes and as soon as Yuu began to kiss him fully on his lips, he closed them completely and kissed him back while tears were still streaming down his face.
He didn’t want his humanity to fade away, didn’t want to become like every other vampire and the fear of it being unavoidable was more than tearing him apart but that alone wasn’t the reason for his break-down.
It was because he couldn’t feel anything when Yuu had kissed him. Not a single emotion was triggered inside of him, not joy, nor happiness, just…nothing. And no matter how many times he begged for another kiss that didn’t change and he began to fear that he was also losing the one thing that still made him feel somewhat human.
…But this time when Yuu kissed him, it was different. It felt…different. Unlike those previous kisses, it wasn’t short-lived, nor rushed. It also wasn’t passionate. It was a slow, patient and so utterly gentle kiss. It was so very careful, almost like Yuu was treating him like glass, afraid to break him with too much pressure.
It was so unlike Yuu who was always so stubborn, hot-headed, reckless and impatient. He had never been the type who took things slow and yet…he was acting so differently than usual, showing Mika a side of him he didn’t even know he had. A side Yuu only showed to him and no one else. A side that was only meant for him to see. A kiss that was only meant for him to feel.
And Mika loved everything about that kiss.
It was filled with so much emotion that it took Mika’s breath away for an instant and a warmth began to flow through his whole body. He never felt more shivers running down his spine like he did in that moment and he could feel at least a trillion butterflies flying around in circles in his stomach, way more than he felt whenever Yuu looked or smiled at him.
That sensation made him feel so dizzy that he feared he might collapse any second but still…he didn’t want it to end. He wanted that moment to last forever.
Everything around him was drowned out. He couldn’t hear, couldn’t think, even forgot his constant fear of losing the last bit of his remaining humanity…and for the first time since four years, Mika didn’t feel like a vampire, like a monster, whose thirst for blood was growing stronger and stronger with each passing day.
In that moment…he was nothing more than a boy in love.
Yuu didn’t even notice at what point Mika had finally stopped crying. He wasn’t paying attention to that or his surroundings since everything around him…suddenly seemed to disappear, as if they were the only people in the world.
It seemed so surreal, almost like a dream to him. Only the loud and rapidly beating of his own heart and the strange and tingling sensation in his stomach, which made him so nervous that he had difficulties to breathe normally, were reminding him…that he wasn’t dreaming, that he really was kissing Mika.
He wasn’t sure if it really had been the right thing to do or if it would had been better to hug him in order to calm him down again but he didn’t regret it even one bit. For some reason…it just felt too right, too nice, for that.
And as long as Mika didn’t show any signs of disliking it…he also didn’t want it to stop.
Slowly, and without him even intending to, his hand that was still placed on Mika’s shoulder at this point, wandered up to his face. In a soothing manner, he began to caress his cheek with his thumb and only seconds after, he felt Mika smiling against his lips.
It was such a tiny reaction, and yet…Yuu had never felt something more beautiful in his life before and suddenly…only one thought was crossing his mind:
…I don’t want to do that with anyone else…except with him…
Startled by that thought at first, Yuu tried to figure out why he was thinking something like that all of a sudden but he absolutely couldn’t think of a reason. Only after some time, he slowly began to realize it.
The reason why everything felt so right…and nice…why he absolutely couldn’t imagine someone else in Mika’s place…why he always felt so comfortable around him…why he could stare at his smile all day long…why his heart seemed to skip so many beats in that moment…and at last what the feeling was called that grew stronger and stronger with each moment that passed.
It felt like an eternity, for both of them, until Yuu eventually broke the kiss and slowly pulled back while removing his hand from his cheek. He opened his eyes again but as soon as they were fully open, Mika quickly buried his face into his shoulder, too embarrassed to meet his gaze.
Silently, they remained like that for a whole while, not being able to get out even one single word or to think of something to say to the other. Usually it was pretty clear what one should say in such a situation but with them it was different.
There had never been the need for either of them to tell each other how they felt about another. Whether it was an ‘I like you’, an ‘I care about you’, a ‘You’re important to me’…or in that case an ‘I love you’. They didn’t need to say it out loud. The way they just had kissed each other was more than enough to let the other know.
But that didn’t mean that it made the embarrassment for them less worse, it was rather the complete opposite since neither of them quite knew how to react or to respond. So they just remained silent, the sensation of each other’s lips still lingering on their own.
“…Say something…”, Mika broke that awkward silence between them after some time in a quiet voice and with a bright red face.
“H-huh?”, Yuu replied, slightly caught off guard by that sudden request and also with a visible blush on his face, “O-oh…um…well I…To…be honest I…really don’t have a clue what you’re supposed to say after you…you know…”, he admitted with a small laugh in his voice, trying to hide how nervous he actually was.
“…Something normal…”
“Um…okay, well…”, Yuu began but paused for a few seconds, trying to think of something ‘normal’ to talk about, “…Really…nice weather today, isn’t it?”, he asked, making Mika laugh with that remark.
“D-don’t laugh.”, he said, while his blush intensified, “I’ve never been in such a situation before…So why do I have to be the one to do the talking? You should say something, too, for a change…”
“As if I had ever been in one.”
“You weren’t?”, Yuu asked, surprised by that confession.
“Of course not.”, Mika replied with a small laugh, not mentioning the one time Krul had kissed him when she turned him into a vampire since it didn’t really count, “After all you’re…”
“Hm? After all I’m what?”, Yuu wanted to know with a hint of curiosity in his voice, confused why he had trailed off all of a sudden.
“…Nothing. Just…forget about it…”, Mika murmured, feeling how his face was heating up because of what he had almost said.
…After all you’re my first love…
“…God…”, he added with a nervous laugh and a shy smile on his face, “I’m feeling so damn warm right now…”
“…Me, too…”, Yuu replied quietly, while he blushed even more and his heart gained speed once again since he already could think of what Mika had wanted to say.
Once again they remained silent after that, only this time it didn’t feel awkward anymore.
After they realized that they both were pretty much nervous and embarrassed and didn’t know how to handle such a situation, both of them felt at ease and slowly, they began to relax again while their nervousness subsided.
Being close to one another and silently listening to each other’s breathing, they enjoyed that little moment between them for a little while until Mika heard a yawn coming from Yuu that broke that comfortable silence.
“…You’re tired?”, he asked, his face still buried in his shoulder.
“Yeah, a little…”, Yuu replied, rubbing his eyes, right before another yawn escaped his lips, “Okay, maybe more than a little.”, he corrected himself.
Hearing him saying that in a sleepy sounding voice, Mika lifted his head from his shoulder again.
“Then…it would be better if you would go to sleep…”, he suggested, quickly averting his gaze, since he still didn’t dare to look into his eyes.
Yuu was about to do what he was told to but suddenly he wasn’t able to look away from Mika. Taking in every single detail of his face, noticing that a faint blush was still tainting his pale cheeks, he kept looking at him for a short moment without saying anything.
“…Stop staring.”, Mika murmured, pulling him out of his trance, as he noticed from the corner of his eyes that he was watching him.
“Oh, u-um, s-sorry.”, Yuu apologized, averting his gaze from him in slight embarrassment, not noticing at all that only seconds after, it was Mika who now stole a glance at him with a tiny smile slowly forming on his lips before he shyly looked away again.
As he could hear Yuu yawn once again shortly after, he quietly sighed and said, shifting his gaze back to him with a serious expression:
“Yuu-Chan, you can’t barely keep your eyes open. You really should go to sleep, don’t you think?”
“Yeah…I guess you’re right. That means if…you’re really feeling better by now.”, Yuu replied, looking over to him in concern.
“Huh? Oh, uh, o-of course I do.”, he said, slightly caught off guard and with a flustered smile on his face.
“Really?”
“I’m really fine, Yuu-Chan, don’t worry so much.”, Mika assured him, “And besides, even if I weren’t, what would you want to do about it? Staying awake the whole night just to comfort me?”, he joked with a small laugh.
“Yeah.”, Yuu said promptly.
“…”
Mika only looked at him in surprise, not quite knowing what he should say to that. Silently, he gazed deeply into his emerald eyes, almost getting lost in them. As he felt how the butterflies were slowly finding their way back into his stomach again and how his face was heating up ever so slightly, he quickly broke the gaze and looked away from him again.
“…Go to sleep…”, he said in a quiet voice.
Yuu kept looking at him for a few more seconds before he replied in an equal quiet tone:
“…Okay.”
He moved back to the spot where he had been sleeping only a while ago and lay down on his back, his head resting on the pillow while he stared at the ceiling and letting out a deep breath. As Yuu was about to close his eyes in order to let sleep overcome him once again, his gaze fell back on Mika who was still sitting on the same spot, leaning against the wall with a thoughtful expression.
“…What?”, he asked, looking over to him, as he noticed that Yuu still wasn’t sleeping but instead watching him.
“Nothing. It’s just…aren’t you also tired? It’s been a pretty long day, after all. You don’t have to keep watch just because of me, you know?”
“No, I’m…I’m fine.”, Mika replied, averting his gaze from him with a clearly fake smile, “Vampires…don’t need to sleep, after all, so…it’s fine.”
“…Don’t beat yourself up over that so much all the time.”, Yuu said in a soft voice, trying to make him feel better, “Vampire, human…it doesn’t matter what we are. So…let’s forget about that for at least one night, okay?”
“Easier said than done, when you haven’t slept in four years, and the only thing you could do at night was thinking about how much time you still have until nothing of you will be left…”
There was it again. That sad and broken look on his face from before.
Yuu had meant to cheer him up with his words but it seemed like he only had made things even worse.
…Dammit.
He mentally cursed himself. Knowing he couldn’t take back what he said and apologizing also wouldn’t do any good, Yuu quickly tried to find something else he could say to him, but nothing came to his mind.
As he looked at Mika’s sad looking face for another short moment and felt his heart aching at that sight, he decided to act solely on his emotion and do what felt right in that moment.
Yuu pulled himself into a sitting position and moved closer to him once again. Before Mika could even react or say anything, he wrapped his arms around him and pulled him into a hug. Feeling how he was tensing up in his arms, Yuu carefully lay down again with Mika now lying on top of him, his head resting on his chest.
“I-I said I don’t need to-”
“I know.”, Yuu cut off his stuttering in a whispering tone that send shivers down his spine, “I…just want to hold you for a while…”
Hearing these words and feeling the soothing warmth of Yuu’s body, Mika could feel his face heating up again and suddenly the words that just wouldn’t come out of his mouth until now, slipped out.
“I’m…afraid.”, he admitted in a quiet voice while clutching at Yuu’s shirt, “Afraid that…I’ll really lose all of my emotions. That I’ll…become like all the other vampires…that I’ll become someone else…”
“It’s okay.”, Yuu assured him in a calm voice.
“I…don’t want to become a monster. I…don’t want to lose my humanity…”, Mika said in an even quieter tone than before.
“It’s okay.”, he repeated once more, slowly running his fingers through Mika’s hair, “It’s okay, Mika. I’m here…and I’ll never let you alone.”
And this was all Mika needed to hear. Not an ‘Everything will be fine.’ not a ‘There’s nothing to be afraid about.’ not a ‘Pull yourself together.’ but a simply ‘It’s okay. It’s okay to be afraid.’ and a ‘You don’t have to endure that all on your own.’ He didn’t ask for more than these few words.
Neither of them said anything after that. They just lay there together with the only sound audible being their breathing. Over the time, Mika’s grip on Yuu’s shirt lessened and he slowly relaxed in his arms, still feeling the slow movements of his hand stroking his hair.
Still lying on top of him, he listened to the steady beating of Yuu’s heart which was the most soothing sound he ever heard in his entire life which calmed him down like nothing else.
“…I’m such a mess, aren’t I?.”, Mika broke the silence between them after a short while with a small but sad laugh, “All I ever do is complaining and whining. I’m always such a pessimist. I can’t believe you’re still willing to stay with me.”
“Of course I do.”, Yuu replied with a smile on his face, “Everyone has their problems, so do you. It’s okay to complain, to whine, or to be pessimistic from time to time, especially in a world like this. I don’t mind all these things. I still like having you around me.”
“…How comes that you always know what to say to cheer me up?”, Mika asked, a genuine smile forming on his lips, “No matter how down I am or how much I worry about something…your words are always able to make me feel better. I wonder if it’s still like that if I…”, he slowly trailed off while his smile slowly disappeared again.
“…Don't worry. I’ll definitely turn you back, Mika. I promise.”, Yuu said in determination, already knowing what Mika had wanted to say.
“You can make everything sound so easy…” he replied, with audible sadness in his voice, “You should think more about your future than mine, you know? Unlike me…you still have one…”
“Mika, that’s not true.”
“Yes, it is.”, Mika objected, “There isn’t something like a ‘future’ for me anymore. I’ll probably stay like this forever anyway. Won’t age. Live for all eternity. Always dependant on blood…That’s all what’s left for me, nothing more…”
“…”
Yuu didn’t like it when Mika was beating himself up so much, just because he was a vampire. Of course some things were different now. He wasn’t human anymore. He didn’t need to sleep or to eat, wasn’t aging anymore, his eyes had an unusual colour, was capable of hearing sounds that humans couldn’t hear, couldn’t die that easily, had to drink blood on a regular basis in order to stay alive.
All these things were undeniable facts…but that didn’t mean that he was less worth than a human now. Even if he was a vampire, he still had every right to be happy.
“Of course you have a future…”, Yuu replied after a short moment of silence, “…Me.”
“…Huh?”, was all Mika managed to say, caught off guard by these unexpected words.
“You know, the world’s…pretty much a mess right now.”, Yuu began with a small laugh in his voice, audible struggling to find the right words, “With that war going on and so…there’s hardly anyone who can currently think about what to do in ten or thirty years since you don’t even know if you’ll live through another day or not and…I’m really not sure when or how it it’s all going to end but it certainly will end one day. And once…everything’s over and…we can finally live in peace without having to fight anymore I…want you to live with me, Mika.”
“…”
“…Let’s live together. Whether you’re a vampire or a human. Whether if it’s in a big town, the countryside or in the middle of nowhere far, far away from here. Even if you want to travel the whole word…it’s all up to you to decide. Everything is fine by me…as long as I can be with you.”
“…”
“I’ll take you wherever you want to. I’ll show you all kind of places you’ve never been before, and whenever you need or want something…then just say it. I’ll give you anything, no matter what it is.”
“…”
“Listen, I…I know there’s nothing I could do to make you forget about being a vampire, that there’s always something that reminds you of it but still…I want you to be happy despite of it. I…want to make you happy. So…let me be your future.”
Another moment of silence fell between them after that. Letting his words slowly sink in, Mika could feel the heat rising to his face once again before a small and flustered laugh escaped his lips.
“…That’s so cheesy…”
Yuu could hear at the tone of his voice that Mika must have been smiling as he said that and also…happy.
Happy because of his words, happy because of…him.
As that thought crossed his mind, Yuu could feel warmth throughout his whole body and he couldn’t help but feel happy, too.
It was in that moment he began to realize how much Mika’s emotions were actually affecting his own.
Whenever Mika was sad, he felt his heart aching and had the urge to do everything he could to make him feel better again and whenever he seemed happy, he was it, too. And if he was apart from Mika, he felt lonely, like a part of himself had been taken away from him and being together with him made him feel complete, somewhat whole. A feeling no one else was capable of giving him.
If Yuu would had to choose a word for that feeling, it would be…home.
He simply felt at home with Mika. And there was no other person he would rather stay with for the rest of his life.
“…Mika?”, he asked, stopping to stroke his hair.
“Hm?”
“Can I marry you?”, it left his lips in a unusual soft voice.
Feeling him shifting in his arms shortly after he posed that question, Yuu broke the embrace, watching how Mika lifted his head from his chest and looked at him with a surprised expression.
“W-w-why?!”, was all Mika managed to say, trying his best not to blush at that unexpected and unusually formulated question.
“Why not?”, Yuu asked back, tilting his head in confusion with an innocent look on his face.
“Because that’s not something you can just ask someone out of the blue like that! When did you even get that idea?!”
“Just now.”
There was he again. The Yuu who always rushed things, never really thought things through and acted purely on a whim.
“Yuu-Chan.”, he said in the calmest voice he could manage, trying not to raise his voice out of embarrassment, “That’s not how it works.”
“Hm? Not?”, Yuu said, giving him an even more confused look than before.
Mika gave a sigh of exasperation, not understanding how someone could really be that clueless.
“Of course not!”, he explained, “You can’t marry someone without getting to know them better at first!”
“We’ve known each other now for eight years, Mika”, Yuu remarked with a small laugh, “What else is there to know?”
“…”
He was right. If there was one person who knew him better than anyone else, it was probably Yuu. But that didn’t mean he was accepting his ‘proposal’ just because of that. Mika didn’t even had a clue where he suddenly got that idea from but he also hadn’t time to think about it since Yuu was interrupting his thoughts all of a sudden.
“…So, can I?”, he asked once again for permission.
“N-no, of course not!.”
“But why?”
“Because you just can’t take someone by surprise like that and expect them to say ‘yes’ right away!”, Mika replied, his embarrassment audible in his voice, “How about if you’ll take things a little bit slower?!”
“Then…”, Yuu said, pausing for a few seconds before he gave him a warm smile and asked in a soft and tender voice, “Would you like to go out with me?”
As he heard that question, Mika’s eyes widened and his face turned bright red, almost as red as his eyes and suddenly…no words wanted to come out of his mouth anymore.
Yuu never saw him that flustered before. It was such a fascinating and adorable sight that he couldn’t help but feeling captivated by it. Not being able to avert his gaze from him anymore, his smile disappeared while his eyes began to shimmer with an emotion, Mika never saw on him before.
Slowly, Yuu reached out his hand to Mika and carefully brushed his hair out of his face, his eyes not leaving him even once. Paralyzed from his touch and gaze, Mika couldn’t move even one single muscle.
As Yuu slowly began to lift his head from the pillow and leaned in, while he closed his eyes, Mika shut tight his own ones, his whole body tensing up, before he could feel how a pair of soft and warm lips were gently pressed against his forehead.
It only lasted a few seconds until Yuu pulled back and opened his eyes, lying back down on the pillow again and as Mika opened his eyes as well, still looking at him with a bright red face, he flashed him one of his usual dorky smiles and Mika was sure…if he wouldn’t had been in love with him already, he sure would have fallen in that very moment.
“…You’re so embarrassing…”, he murmured as he buried his face into his chest again, hearing how fast his heart was beating in that moment.
Hearing that, Yuu laughed but before he could say anything to it, Mika added:
“…I would like to…”
“Huh?”, Yuu asked, not quite understanding what he meant with that.
“Your question just now…”
“Would you like to go out with me?”
“…I would like to…”, Mika repeated once more.
Letting his words sink in for a few seconds, a smile appeared on Yuu’s face and he slowly wrapped his arms around Mika again.
“Hmmm.”, he hummed as he closed his eyes and started to run his fingers through Mika’s hair once again, hearing a consent sigh from him as he did that and feeling how he slowly began to relax after some time.
They remained like this for the rest of the night without saying anything to each other, only listening to the other’s breathing.
Eventually Mika could feel how Yuu stopped to stroke his hair, signalling him that he must have fallen asleep.
Not being able to sleep himself, Mika just lay there with his eyes closed, his head still resting on his chest while he listened to the steady beating of Yuu’s heart, and felt his chest rising and falling with every single breath he took…and he never felt more safe, loved or at home like he did in that moment.