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Tonight's the night. Stiles is starting his New Year's
resolutions early, and by that he means he's going to tell Derek how he feels. After
years of pining, he's going to suck it up and admit he's been half in love with
Derek since he graduated high school.
Of course, now he has to find Derek.
He weaves his way through the party, doing his best not to drop his drink on any of the other people in the loft. Stiles doesn't even know most of them; he's pretty sure Erica and Lydia are at least 90% responsible for the number of people here. It was nice of Derek to let them borrow the loft, but now Stiles is fairly certain that Derek has made his way to somewhere that there are fewer people.
Sure enough, he finds him out on the balcony, one hand holding his phone, the other loosely wrapped around a bottle of beer.
Stiles's heart hammers in his throat, and it's all he can do to make himself walk up to the railing next to Derek. "Hey, great party."
Derek snorts and tucks his phone back in his pocket. "You know I didn't have anything to do with it."
"Yeah, but you let them use your place." Stiles nods back to the mess of people dancing through the window. "That makes it at least partly your party."
"Somehow, I doubt Lydia or Erica would agree with you."
Stiles takes another swig of beer, hoping to build up his courage some more. Surely Derek can hear his heart dancing all over the place. "Eh, they'll deal. I'll thank them nicely later."
Derek huffs, and it's not quite a laugh, but he is smiling, his face half-lit by the mostly full moon above and the city lights below. The sight makes Stiles's heart do another flip in his chest.
"What are you doing out here, Stiles?" Derek asks.
Stiles scoffs. "What, I've got to have a reason to come say hi?"
Derek gives him a knowing look. "You don't have to have a reason, but that doesn't mean you don't have one."
Stiles sets his beer on the railing and focuses on keeping his hands and breathing steady. "Maybe I just wanted to come out and see you."
Derek snorts again and takes a drink. "Good one. Try again."
The dismissive tone is a surprise. Stiles elbows him. "What, you don't believe me? You can hear my heartbeat."
Derek frowns. "But why would you leave a party with your friends to come see me?"
Stiles's heart drops and he stares at Derek, uncomprehending. "Are you saying we're not friends?"
"That's not—" Derek cuts himself off and scowls at the streets below. "That's not what I'm saying. I'm just the guy who owns the building, who's letting you borrow his loft for a party. There are a dozen people in there who'd rather have your attention. Why are you—"
"Because we are friends," Stiles cuts in, because he can't stand to hear Derek disparage himself anymore. "And when it's five minutes to midnight on New Year's Eve, there's nobody I'd rather be standing next to than you."
Derek jerks his head up and finally looks at Stiles, really looks at him, pale eyes a bit confused. Stiles is still scared, but he's also angry, angry that Derek thinks there's any place he'd rather be, anyone he'd rather be with.
"I like you," Stiles declares, and his heart feels like it's going to beat right out of his chest. "I have for years, but either I was too young, or you weren't here, or there are a million other reasons we kept missing each other, but I'm not letting another year pass without letting you know how important you are to me, how much you mean to me. And it doesn't matter if you don't feel the same way, I know you probably don't, but I just...you're important. To me. And I care about you. A lot."
I'm in love with you, he thinks, but it's stupid to say something like that right now.
Derek continues to stare at him, like he doesn't hear or understand what Stiles is saying. His mouth's hanging open just enough that Stiles can see his two front teeth, and it's such an adorably gobsmacked expression that it makes Stiles ache.
The silence stretches awkwardly between them, and Stiles scratches the back of his neck. Inside the loft, he can hear someone starting the New Year's countdown.
He pushes away from the railing. "Well, then. That went spectacularly. I'm just going to—"
Derek catches him by the elbow and kisses him.
Stiles is so surprised he freezes, not sure of what to do.
Derek pulls back, but he doesn't let go. "I like you, too," he says quietly. "For longer than I should have."
His heart's hammering again, but this time it's for a different reason. "Oh," Stiles says. "Well. You know, they say what you're doing at midnight on New Year's Eve is what you'll be doing for the rest of the year."
"Oh." Derek smiles. "So..."
"So I would really like to spend the next three hundred and sixty-five days kissing you," Stiles says in a rush.
Derek's smile turns blinding, and he pulls Stiles back in for another kiss. "Me, too."