Chapter Text
The war does not miraculously stop quickly.
Ben wasn’t expecting it to. Ra seems to have had another opinion - over time her glares get darker and hollower. Neither Obi-Wan nor Aben’yaa had any such thoughts. Obi-Wan has seen war, has seen it in all its ugly splendour. Aben’yaa has long since become accustomed to the darker nature of sentient beings.
And Ben? It doesn’t take much to figure out that the nearest available KnightCorps Jedi is Qui-Gon. And his attachment to Tahl is strong, for all that Obi-Wan and Ben know the woman will never forgive him for it. He hasn’t answered any comms according to the Council so it will be some time before someone else is close enough. Ra loses her temper then and it’s truly impressive but there’s nothing much the Council can do. There’s nothing much anything can do.
But there is something to be done, the Force is clear on that. It’s stupid really but Ben decides it has to be her. She’s not Obi-Wan Kenobi, Master of Soresu. She’s not Aben’yaa, who keeps on fighting. (She is.)
She’s not them but she is here.
Ben is here.
And so they plot, using whatever they can scrape together. In a way, there is nothing to do. No ships want to land on Melidaan and so the supplies are fast running out. There are a few main fields the Young inform them. If they can find a way to cut off access, the Elders will have to listen. It seems cruel and indeed it is but it is nothing like the Elders, nothing like the parents who kill their own children for wanting the war to end, for wanting peace.
Besides, they reason, there are a few crops aboard Ben’s ship that grow incredibly fast if stimulated right. They are not sustainable afterwards but there should to be enough for others to grow in the meantime. The food will not be entirely nutritious or tasteful for some time.
Nield smiles at that, cuttingly. What is a little more rationing if there is no war? And there may be relief aids from other planets - Alderaan is particularly well-known for its charitableness.
Ben swears to herself that she will see it done. Food is important, so important. Fasting is a religious experience - it should not be done out of necessity. She knows first hand the feeling of food prepared with love, with care. She knows first hand fasting out of necessity.
She settles in to meditate while they are gone - her actions of late have been more clouded than she would like. To experience emotions and not act on them is a skill she has yet to master. But she has time, she reminds herself, time.
There is no emotion, there is peace./ Emotion, yet peace.
Ben settles, exhales. Feels the truth in the force. There is no emotion for it is not her emotion. Inside her, there is peace. But there is still emotion and a Jedi must learn to have both, for they coexist. Obi-Wan‘s knot of emotions gently begins to loosen as she breathes out through her nose.
There is no ignorance, there is knowledge./ Ignorance, yet Knowledge.
For there to be ignorance, there must be knowledge - how else would one be able to identify ignorance? Aben‘yaa settles here, the self-consciousness passing gently and ever so slowly away, as if a cloud.
There is no passion, there is serenity./ Passion, yet serenity.
Ben still feels it, the burning desire to shield Nield and Cerasi. But that is attachment, fierce, protective and most of all desperate, dangerous. She doesn’t try to crush it. It is to be witnessed, not to be suppressed. Ben watches it, lets love nourish her as she waits and sees it slowly reduce, slowly unclench. They will be provided for, as is the will of the Force, and she may help but it is not hers keep to herself.
There is no chaos, there is harmony./ Chaos, yet harmony.
Ben is not separate from Aben’yaa and Obi-Wan, she just does not want to slip. But, she muses, can she? Can she when they are the same as her? Ben centres herself again, allows the next thought about the meaning of her name, not as randomly chosen as one might expect. She lets this thought pass, waits and continues.
There is no death, there is the Force./ Death, yet the Force.
The Force cradles her gently, oh so gently and there are tears in her eyes. How could there not be? Love is gentle, kind, timeless, unconditional. Ben surrenders into it and waits again. Here, she follows her breathing for a short while. She doesn’t need this grounding, not when the Force is everywhere. Not when love is everywhere. Ben takes it anyway.
She carries the peace with her to their talks.
Ben channels the emotions as much as she needs to but stops to remind herself that she is a conduit, nothing more. She is not an emotion, is not sad(ness) or anything else. Ben is.
Obi-Wan’s silver tongue makes an appearance that honestly, she probably should have expected. Aben’yaa stands tall and firm where she once would have cowered. Ben smiles, not pridefully, but in appreciation. She can feel the Force, feels its wholeness, feels its beauty.
Love grows, she has long since realised. Love grows to fill anything but is in. It doesn’t choke but it doesn’t stop just before either, incomplete.
And they manage.
They manage to negotiate a treaty, they begin to rebuild the infrastructure. Ra and Ben will not leave for a few months, not until everything is up and running but it is a first step, at long last.
Cerasi commissions a sculpture, a symbol and they carve the names on, one by one of those who are dead.
Nield commissions one too, after he and Ben excuse themselves for a private conversation. No one knows what is said but they come out looking like two or indeed three old friends when Cerasi joins them.
Right in the heart of the city, there is the sculpture of those who have Fallen, next to those who have Risen.
Beneath the name Ben, lies Obi-Wan smaller in print but just as important.