Chapter Text
Chapter 2
As he woke up, Jack saw fire. Fire in his lungs, his heart, his eyes. Everywhere. The sky had turned into a pale blood-red dripping into the darkened abyss. He's falling, he knows it, but no air pulled against him, no gravity affecting him yet everything was dragging him down. He had to get out, out of wherever he was in this hell. He claws for something - anything - as his fingers burn while reaching into the void. He opened for a breath. Just one puff. It only got worse. Magma pours and fills into him, burning him from the inside.
He’s in so much pain, his signature 3D glasses searing and melting into his eyes. Jack can’t take it anymore. He feels his hand grab onto something and pulls himself up without looking. In front of him lay a glass wall. He can see his reflection. It’s not him, horns, drooping animal ears, a suit. No. He died. But so did Jack.
Jack shot up, panting and so goddamn afraid. Then his memories came back to him. Of course - he had fallen asleep on his balcony last night.
The nightmares were not a rarity, they happened often he would even say, but that was the first one where he had actually escaped the void. All of the other dreams ended with the nonstop burning and screaming and screaming oh god so many screams. But not this time.
He brushed his hand over his head repeatedly, feeling the same spot over and over, reminding himself he was not cursed with the horns. Not anymore.
Jack watches the salmon in the river swim faster as they get closer to what remained of L'Manburg and he feels a spark of pity for the former country. He remembers fighting for the cosy caravan and the pleasant pastures, but that was all gone now. Jack had respected Wilbur a lot back then, he was a fierce leader who wouldn't back down against evil. He gave Jack the courage to fight, and Thunder1408 was definitely not brave by any means. Because of this fierce respect he had, it was an understatement to say it had hurt when Ghostbur told him he didn't recognize Jack. Who actually remembers Jack Manifold?
As he stood up, he felt the usual waves of nausea and fatigue he had when the nightmares occurred - but he suppressed it and moved on. There was no time to be weak as he moved to walk down the stairs. Barely managing the trip downstairs, he pushed one of the creaky spruce doors open and smelt the fresh air.
Surveying past the half-broken and burnt trees that used to provide a peaceful landscape now only reminded him of why he had to leave the place. Before those memories hurt him, others cut to his mind first as Jack looked down man-made, stone hole, the day he lost his last life to Technoblade all coming back to him. He couldn’t stay here any longer. "Death cannot control you any longer, you're for a reason, Thunder." He reassured himself. "Tommy is responsible for all of this, for every pain you’ve ever felt. It’s all because of him."
Jack walked up the exploded and battered Prime Path, passing Tommy’s house and other decaying buildings before he stopped at the museum. He stared at the half finished replica of the Carmavan, pressing the button beside the locked door, Jack stepped inside the front of the van.
Jack reminded himself to praise Eret, it even smelt like the van, the thick musk of blaze powder filling your lungs like a heavy smoke that you couldn't cough out even if you tried. No way the van was a safe work-environment. Then again to Jack it was more of a home than a workplace. At least Wilbur made it seem like that. Wilbur. The manipulative bastard. Making children fight in a drug war for his own entertainment? Never in a million years would Jack side with Dream, but Lord was Wilbur a sick bastard.
Passing into the main body of the van was a storm of past memories rushing back to him. Dicking around with Tommy, throwing potions at Fundy, eating Niki's food off the dirty, potion infused table. Those were the good days. Probably.
When he looked back on those memories, he felt warm. Not in his firecracker heart way, not in his burning and scorched lungs way, but in a logs on the fire in winter kind of way. Jack knew it was just nostalgia and there were moments he chose to ignore, but for those small moments where he could be himself - just a 17 year old boy - were irreplaceable.
Then the sharp pain that cursed his heart began. Jack wasn't an idiot, he knew coming back to life had its consequences and demons. Except before being revived, he assumed it was metaphorical.
Out of the corner of his eye he watched a shadowy figure pull at his heart, puppeteering him to regain his anger. If there was a God out there, Jack was just its toy. When he killed Tommy he wouldn't be a toy anymore.
Jack regained his posture and fire, pulling his corpse self to the door. He had some business to attend to with Niki anyways.
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Niki had not slept that night.
It wasn't the first time nor the last. She used to stay up for night watch back in L'Manburg, Manburg and now for Tommy. She still hated him. She still wanted to just put him out of his misery, because he was in more misery than she was.
She saw that yesterday. Tommy talking about his exile felt refreshing in a way. A new perspective, one that now she realises she needs. Tommy was just like the rest of them, a broken record stuck repeating the same horrible actions they were told was 'necessary' to survive.
As the sun peeked through the holes in the wall where dirt had fallen or been destroyed, Niki realised she had better be going. But before she could make her way to the two wooden doors, she heard a growl and a whimper. As it turned out, the growl was Tommy's stomach. The poor boy probably hadn't eaten in a while - Niki certainly never remembered him eating all throughout yesterday - so she ignited the furnace and began to cook some pork chops and eggs.
~
The smell of greasy pork woke Tommy from his sleep, first being worried that his house was burning down again, but then remembering what had happened the day before. He rubbed his eyes as he turned over, shifting out of his red bed sheets as he raised his leg up to tie his shoe laces. Tommy would never admit it, but the skill had only just been learnt. Surprisingly tying shoe-laces was one of the few things Ghostbur actually remembered. Wilbur had always patronised him for being unable to tie his shoe-laces back when he was alive, but Ghostbur was caring and patient about it, letting Tommy take his time as he struggled. Ghostbur even sounded proud of him when he first succeeded, a tone of voice that was rare to his ears.
As both laces became tied, he speedily shot off his bed and walked as fast as his sleepy legs could carry him. Gosh was he hungry. He slowed down as he entered the front part of his home, he couldn't look uncool in front of a woman of course, as his eyes beamed towards the item in the furnace. Plump, juicy pork chops. Two of them, roasting in their own fats. Yet atop the furnace was a frying pan, sizzling as two sunny-side-up eggs were being scooped off onto a corresponding plate. Tommy was so absorbed with the idea of eating the food he didn't even notice Niki holding the plate out for him to take.
"Are you alright there, Tommy?" She questioned, concern growing on her face. He nodded, barely able to get words out "Wow! Jeez, thanks Niki. You didn't have to do this." Sincerity was his goal, but it came off more like neutrality. Still he took the plate off Niki's hands and dug in before he even sat down.
Niki sat next to him, watching him eat the warm food. She was glad he was getting fed, but it was clear now that this was a rare occurrence. She really had to invite him to her underground city when it was finished. The girl also began to eat her food, but with more civility and manners than the hungry boy.
"Holy shit that was amazing Niki, cheers!" He wiped his mouth with his sleeve and rose to put his plate in the cauldron when- slip- suddenly a single smash echoed the home. Tommy was still in the same upright position, arm extended with a grip that held nothing. His eyes glanced at the floor, pupils dilated and lips quivering. It was loud. Now it was quiet. Just like-
Niki interrupted the quiet as she pulled gently on Tommy's shoulder, making remarks like "careful!" and "don't step on the sharp bits." But as she focused on Tommy, something was wrong. He had frozen, almost like he was waiting for something to happen. "Tom? It's alright it was just a plate.. I can get you a new one later today, okay?" No response.
They stayed like this for over half a minute, though it felt much, much longer. Then Tommy began to mumble. It started small, but grew louder and louder until Niki could hear what he was saying. It was mostly incoherent ramblings, except for one sentence. Chills ran over Niki's body, her goosebumps activating down her arms. Disgust coursed through her senses. She had to act.
Niki stepped in front of Tommy, disregarding the smashed ceramics and lightly hovered her hands over his shoulders. He didn't seem physically opposed to touch earlier but she wasn't going to take any chances. "Tommy, Tom- look around. Tell me what you see, give me 3 things that you can see right now."
His eyes seemed to register her talking, glancing around rapidly as he tried to take in his surroundings. "T…TnT.." A tear left his eye. "Tommy, focus on me, you are at home. You're in the central SMP in your house." Shit, Niki was not good at this. Why couldn't Puffy be here instead??
"Okay forget what you can see - just - just close your eyes for me. What can you smell right now?" Tommy closed his eyes, his eyelids fluttering with activity. He had begun to shake "Uhm.. meat.. pork.. dirt…" as the full body shaking started, it seemed to stop after that. Progress was being made. "Okay good. Remember? We ate pork chops and eggs for breakfast." Tommy nodded lightly.
"Okay Tommy, we'll try this again, open your eyes and tell me some things you can see." His eyes opened again as he looked around, his eyes less jittery and scared than before. Though the tears rolling down his face didn't help with his eyesight, he succeeded in spotting items. "I see.. I see the furnace. There's a chest- my chest.." Niki nodded and the hands that hovered over his shoulders now held onto him.
Tommy's tears just gushed out after that, sobbing into Niki's shoulder. It would have been a strange sight, the 6'1 teenager crying down onto the 5'5 adult, but the absurdity was in neither of their minds. They stayed like this for several minutes, Niki periodically rubbing Tommy's back in circular motions to calm the boy down. It eventually ended with the two of them sitting back down where they had eaten breakfast earlier, Tommy leaning on Niki for support.
"I'm.. I'm sorry Niki. I didn't mean to do that- I shouldn't- I don't cry, I don't.." but Tommy was cut off.
"There's no need to apologise, this stuff happens. Besides, there's no law against crying." She smiled softly, gripping Tommy tighter into the hug, to which he smiled appreciatively at her.
"So what you doing today?" Tommy asked, hopeful that she wouldn’t be busy. However she frowned and looked off worryingly, responding with a slight worried tone "I.. I have some business I need to sort out now. But I'll be free later, probably." Tommy just accepted he would be spending his time alone that day and let go of Niki, allowing her to leave to attend to her 'business'.
She wanted to stay with him. Really she did. But it was better if Jack didn't bring his anger directly to Tommy's house, he didn't deserve to endure more pain today.
She stepped away from him and stopped at the door before she left. "How about you go see Tubbo? He should be free today." From the look on his face Tommy was pondering it, but she left before he had any answer.
Noon. It was time to face Jack again.
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Jack and Niki needed to talk. They had been going about this the wrong way.
To Jack, the two had been too cautious, too merciful. Tommy wasn't going to be killed through anvils and pitfalls, it was going to take a sharp blade and a bag for his head.
On the other hand, to Niki the two had been too harsh, too violent. Maybe they should just lay off the kid for once, he clearly seemed to be having problems already - two murderous ex-friends could make everything worse for the hurting boy.
But as the two met on the staircase that descended to the ruins of L'Manburg, these two opposing ideologies clashed worse than before. It had quickly turned from a debate between two allies to a verbal fight against one another.
"No Niki you don't understand! This is what he does. He'll lure you in with a stupid fucking false sense of security and before you know it he's trading your life for a fucking music disc!"
"Jack we are being too harsh on him, he's not some monster! He's just a kid who needs some help. We all need help right now."
"We? And who is included in this we? Because it's definitely NOT me. This is the first time in a long while I've finally seen the truth! The truth about Tommy- about this server- about YOU! YOU'RE JUST LIKE THE REST OF THEM. I THOUGHT I COULD TRUST YOU NIKI. YOU SAID WE WERE FRIENDS, THIS DOESN'T SOUND LIKE FRIENDS."
"So what then? What now Jack? Are we no longer friends, is that what you want?"
A pause.
"Yeah. You know what fuck you Niki. You- God why did you change your mind about this? You were the one who wanted to do this first!"
"I didn't let anger and revenge blind me, Jack. Maybe you should see Puffy sometime, she's good at working through all this. Please, this isn't healthy anymore."
In response, Jack just muttered a spiteful "Fuck you man." And walked past her, heading south east, towards the nether portal by spawn. Niki headed in a different direction though, back towards Tommy's base to help clean up the mess he made.