Chapter Text
He should not have taken this photo.
Fuyumi, an uncommon joy in her eyes as she smiles; Shouto, spilling his noodles all over the table because he couldn’t help but laugh. Enji, half his face covered by his hand, but he’s grinning too; and finally Natsuo himself, leaning back and looking highly amused at the whole scene.
It’s awful. It’s awful because it’s not real, because it never happened, and it never will, and he hates that half of him wants it to, wants them all to be happy.
Natsuo’s fingers rub on the laminated paper. Out of all the photos he’s taken while he’s been in this dimension— this, this is the worst one. It makes light of a tragedy, makes light of their family. There are only four seats at their table.
Things are different now. Fuyumi and Shouto live with Rei; Enji and Natsuo both live on their own. Touya, of course, is in jail. But back then— back when Natsuo had first seen Enji after he’d nearly died fighting the High-End— back then, they’d all been doing so much worse, but Fuyumi had taken the chance to try. And Natsuo had taken the chance to listen, so he’d come, and for the first time in more years than he knew, he’d spoken to his younger brother.
And then he’d left. He always left, didn’t he?
You’ve left them now, a voice in his head says. They’ll never find you. He's going to find a way to get back home. He is.
Natsuo rips the photo into shreds. He’s got a lot of photos, some more cursed than others. This one… he’s not keeping this one. It’s not— it’s not that he wants Enji to be happy, because he doesn’t. But maybe if Dad hadn’t been so angry all the time, things might not have turned out as they had. Maybe they’d all be laughing about Shouto spilling his noodles instead of staring each other down ‘cause Enji got a scar to match his son.
It always came back to the scars.
“And this one’s called a Silvally, there are a million different colors it can be, look at them all—“ Theo’s voice suddenly breaks into Natsuo’s thoughts, and he looks up to see that a few seats over, Theo is enthusiastically explaining his Pokémon game to his mother. Natsuo hadn’t even noticed the scene ending, but the rest of everyone else was doing their own thing too; Felicity’s leaning on the wall and scrolling through her phone, Nathan’s reading something, and Evan’s talking to Kayvan, who seems to have almost appeared out of thin air.
Natsuo’s said it before, but he’ll say it again; although he hates every second of what they do, he can’t bring himself to hate them. He wouldn’t want to, anyway— they wouldn’t deserve it.
“Fuyumi is stupid.”
Okay, maybe he can dislike Felicity.
“Don’t say that!” Nathan protests.
“Maybe that’s a little harsh, but come on. What does she think she’s trying to do, get the family back together? They never were together.” Felicity says. And— and that’s true, it is, but Natsuo doesn’t blame Fuyumi for holding onto something that they never had. For hoping for something they never would. It wasn’t a future he’d ever thought he’d want himself, but now he was here; and this place had a way of forcing you to look at your life from a different perspective.
He stands up, and drops the ripped-up photo in the trash, still watching Felicity and Nathan discuss Fuyumi. Well… Evan is the opposite of Endeavor, so Felicity is the opposite of Fuyumi, he supposes. He still wants to say something, though. To defend his sister; but if he joins the debate, he doesn’t trust himself not to trip over the line of detachment he’s been holding behind, and say something really idiotic. Honestly, Natsuo doesn’t know how he’s managed to keep his mouth shut for so long. Maybe it’s because he mostly spends time with Kayvan, and Kayvan isn’t the dimensional clone of anyone Natsuo knows.
He is, however, the clone of Overhaul, but Natsuo doesn’t think that’s going to be a problem.
“If you rub at it, Theo, they’re going to have to put it on again.” Caroline says, and Natsuo glances back at them; it looks like Caroline’s just prevented Theo from messing with the fake scarring around his eye.
“It starts to feel weird once I have it on for a few hours.” Theo complains. Natsuo’s sure it does.
He remembers what had happened, with the kettle— he’d been nine years old, when Rei hadn’t been able to tell the difference between the eyes of her son and her husband. Shouto’s screaming won’t ever not haunt him; Theo’s replication of it hadn’t even come close. Shouto was the only one who had come out of that situation with physical scars, but he wasn’t the only one who’d lost a mother that day, what with Enji sending Rei off to the hospital immediately after the incident. After then, it had been months before Natsuo had found out where, and he had Fuyumi had gone to visit her, and she’d been in a terrible state—and almost immediately after that, Touya had died, and that event had caused Rei’s mental integrity to collapse.
For many years afterwards, Natsuo and Fuyumi had been on their own. Barely seeing their father, never seeing their brother, the kettle incident had condemned Natsuo’s childhood to silence. There was the hired help, sure, but in terms of family, the two of them only had had each other. Would Touya still have gone to Sekoto Peak, if Rei had been there to talk him out of it? Maybe. He had never listened to her much anyway. But then again, maybe not.
There were so many maybes, so many if onlys, so many ways things could have gone. It didn’t really bear thinking about, but Natsuo couldn’t not think about it, surrounded by constant reminders as he was. Because the past was past, but it wouldn’t ever truly go away; Theo could clean the scar off his face, but Shouto couldn’t, and Natsuo never would clean the scars from his heart.
“I just don’t understand why.” Felicity says, her voice filtering back into Natsuo’s awareness. No, she’ll never understand Fuyumi, not like Natsuo does; and Natsuo will never understand Fuyumi, not like how Fuyumi herself does. But unlike everyone else here, he’s on the other side. Their fiction is his reality, and it hurts. He’s used to it by now, used to this terrible place— but it hurts.
***
(Timeskip)
“You have to help Midoriya and the others, please! We’ll have time for the rest later!” Shouto screams, looking frantically between his father and his brother; Dabi, Touya, who’s diving down from above in a rocket of fire, face twisted with a horrible joy.
“DAD!” Shouto cries.
Endeavor isn’t moving, though; he’s standing still, unable to move as the consequences of his actions bears down on him. He’s just… staring, utterly horrified at the inconceivable truth, leaving Shouto to fight Dabi alone.
“Of fricking course.” Natsuo grumbles, looking down with disdain from the mezzanine level of the production studio. “Useless as usual.” He was once again trading in his own peace of mind for knowledge of events; but how could he stop himself from learning how Touya had confronted the others? He’d heard of what had happened, of course, but thanks to this travesty of a dimension, he could watch the events in person.
I didn’t know he had mentioned me, Natsuo thinks; Taylor, as Dabi, had commented on how he “ran crying to Natsu” and… God, even then, Touya had still used his nickname? He still remembered one of the few people who had ever cared for him? Natsuo’s incredule loses momentum, though, when it becomes clear that Dabi had sent the villain that had nearly killed him.
“Almost killed? That’s too bad; if Natsu’d died, that would have really hurt Endeavor.” Taylor laughs. And Natsuo knows that Touya has a lot to work through, but it still pains him to hear.
Natsuo hasn’t talked to Evan since… since telling him the truth. Natsuo can’t face the man who looks just like his father, so instead he’s watching from where no one can find him. And Evan’s standing there, watching Taylor pretend to try and kill Theo; and they’re flying through the air on safety cables, and there’s a giant greenscreen in the background, and altogether it’s awful.
Enji had frozen exactly like that, exactly like he was stock-still now, when Natsuo’s life had been in danger. And now—and back then—it was the same thing, and he was waiting for children to take his place as the hero. You’re the number one hero, Endeavor, can’t you do a little better at it when your family’s on the line? But no. Enji can’t even do what he’s best at when his children are involved, and it’s not like Natsuo expected anything more from him. He’s disappointed, though.
“Look at him, Shouto! He’s going to watch you die, and he can’t do a single thing about it! He’s completely broken… and it makes me so happy!” Taylor cheers, holding Theo tightly in a hug. The action confuses Natsuo somewhat until he realizes that there’s probably fire involved. But it’s going to be added in with CGI, because nothing’s real here. Because the utter despair in Evan’s expression is as false as Theo’s screaming, but that doesn’t matter when you consider that it’s all a replica. A year ago, an infinite distance away, this is what happened.
“Hi, Yuki!” a voice calls. Natsuo whirls around, and is surprised to see Allie.
“Hey, what are you doing up here?” he asks her.
“Kayvan brought me to the high-up area before, when Dad was filming Spearfall… he got killed by darkness spikes. It was funny.” Allie says, walking up to the edge of the area. Natsuo watches her carefully. “What’s happening now?” she asks. “Why isn’t he doing anything?”
“Well,” Natsuo says, “that’s because— wait, how much do you know about the Todorokis?” He assumes that Evan must have told her something, but he doesn’t really want to trouble a small child with his family’s trauma. Shaking away the knowledge that Touya had been about Allie’s age when Enji had begun to make the house into one of horrors, and that Shouto had been even younger than that, he wonders what exactly he’s supposed to say.
“Once my fire destroys you, Shouto, I wonder— what kind of face do you think Dad will make!?” Taylor screams; and she’s putting her all into acting, and Natsuo doesn’t know if it’s worse seeing her in makeup or without it.
“I know that Endeavor has four kids, and he’s not nice to any of them. That’s why Dabi hates Endeavor, right? Because he’s a bad father?” Allie asks, and then she frowns. “Why can’t Endeavor just be nice…”
“It’s Endeavor’s fault that Dabi almost died.” Natsuo tells her.
“Dabi almost died?” Allie asks.
“Yeah.” Natsuo says. He sits down on the mezzanine, so that he’s at Allie’s height.
“You know how when Taylor plays Dabi, he wears all that purple stuff?” Allie nods.
“That’s supposed to be Dabi’s scars. Dabi… he almost burned to death, and everyone thought he was gone. Nobody realized that he’d survived.”
For the first week afterwards, Natsuo had hoped that Touya was still alive. No body had been found, and that meant something, right? But then Touya’s jawbone was discovered… Natsuo remembers the sound of the world shattering.
It had been quiet.
“Now Dabi’s back, and he wants his revenge… he reveals that he’s alive. He’s alive, and look at what he is, look at him; Endeavor can’t look away.”
If only he’d cared to look at Touya at all, when Touya had been a boy; if only Natsuo could have made him see. If only.
“And that’s… it, I guess.”
Natsuo had had thoughts, before, of Enji’s awfulness being revealed to the world. He’s thought of doing it himself, trying to get retribution, but wouldn’t dare without permission from the rest of the family— and he’s never had the courage to ask them. He had thoughts, too, along the lines of what if Touya was here? What would he do?
Well. It’s been a while since then, and now Natsuo knows the answers to those questions. He wonders how Touya’s doing at the moment, as Natsuo vanishing off the face of the earth without a trace for three full months probably isn’t much of a help to Touya’s mental health. Is he laughing at Shouto’s sorrow? Or crying alongside him?
Natsuo wonders if someday, Evan will tell Kayvan and Allie about him. Probably. Wouldn’t it be strange, though? To learn years later that a man you’d known once had been from another dimension, fictional in your eyes. To learn something that would change the entire concept of a movie you’d worked on… and the whole time, you’d never realized.
Hah. Natsuo had never thought he’d become some kind of cryptid.
He watches as the filming of the scene winds down; everyone’s tired after multiple takes, and they’re all done for the day.
“Looks like your Dad’s finished.” Natsuo tells Allie, and she runs off to go meet Evan, who’s picking himself up off the ground. Natsuo remembers that Enji had needed surgery after the battle, and there had even been a high possibility of him dying— Natsuo hasn’t given much thought to the fact back then, what with Touya, but he’d thought about it later. His father could have died.
And Natsuo isn’t quite sure what he wants to think about that.
On one hand? Whatever, he’d never cared about the man anyway. Spending extra thoughts on Enji was nothing he wanted to do. On the other hand, Enji was still his father, and was trying to do better. Was doing a half-decent job at it, too. Natsuo would never forgive him, but he can’t deny he’s glad that his father has seen sense. For the rest of his family more than anything else; he knows they’re grateful for what Enji’s doing with his life now, and he wouldn’t want to take that from them.
Natsuo goes down the stairs, still planning to avoid Evan; he can’t stop thinking about Enji frozen, broken from shock and terror. From an inability to fight Touya, to do what needed to be done. Shouto had had to face Touya on his own. Shouto, who had been crying, but was forcing himself into not falling apart. Shouto is better, in every way, than Enji will ever be.
***
(Timeskip)
“You’re wrong. You don’t know anything.”
“Hey— there’s no reason to be rude!” Kayvan insists. He and Yuki have been working on special effects leading to the Deku Vigilante Arc; they’ve been at it for a few hours, and are both tired. So of course it’s the perfect time for one of the other techs, who appears to be in an irritable mood, to start harassing Yuki.
“Look, just go ask Taylor, he’ll confirm. I don’t feel like arguing.” Yuki sighs.
“You haven’t even been on the restructured set for the Todoroki house—there’s no way you know exactly how it’s set up.”
Yuki makes a noise that’s something like scoffing. “I know what I’m doing.”
“I doubt that.”
Yuki opens his mouth, looking like he’s going to say something, but then thinks better of it; before he can do anything else, though, a loud crashing sound comes from the direction of said restructured set. Kayvan exchanges a glance with Yuki, then they both run over—a crashing sound wasn’t in the script for today.
“Dad!” Kayvan shouts, once they get there; Evan’s sitting on the floor, looking amused and annoyed and worried all at once.
“I’m okay.” he says.
“What happened?” Kayvan asks, looking around at the scene; the Shouto doll is lying facedown and forgotten, and Allie and Riley are talking to…
“Who are you?” Kayvan asks the boy; he seems to be a little older than Allie.
“I’m Zach. And, uh. Sorry?” the boy says, embarrassed and apologetic.
“Don’t worry about it.” Evan sighs. Yuki mutters something that Kayvan can’t hear.
“He tripped Evan.” Riley says, grinning. Her smile clashes violently with her makeup; dark circles under her eyes, and a pale face.
“I don’t blame him.” Evan says.
“I told you it was okay!” Allie says.
“What’s going on?” Yuki asks, stepping into the set. He freezes, glancing from Allie to Zach, who waves. “Allie?” he asks, blinking at her. “You’re— I didn’t expect— you’re playing the younger version of Fuyumi?”
“Yeah!” Allie says, grabbing the bangs of her wig. “I asked if I could, and they said yes!”
“And you’re…”
“I’m playing the younger version of Natsuo.” Zach says. Yuki stares at him for a oddly tense moment.
“From what I understand, the only reason we haven’t a real kid for Shouto is cause Endeavor beats him up.” Riley laughs, and Evan and Yuki wince simultaneously. “So here are the others.”
“Wait— you tripped Dad?” Kayvan asks.
“That’s what that crash was?”
“Dad?” Zach asks.
“Kayvan’s my brother.” Allie explains.
“Oh. OH. Yeah, I, uh… we were supposed to just hide and look scared in the corner, but then it got… pretty scary? Like, actually. And I got worried, and felt like I should do something, so when Evan was walking by me, I pushed one of these vases into his path without really thinking about it. Because. Um. Yeah.” Zach says, with a weak smile.
“Kid… jeez, I’m sorry.” Riley says. “I explained this to David before, but—“
“It’s a story.” Yuki blurts out. Everyone stares at him.
“Yuki…” Evan starts.
“It’s— it’s an important story.” Yuki says. He pauses, looking at Evan again, and Kayvan wonders once more what he’s missing. “But— there’ll never be fire quirks. There’ll never be heroes and villains. Not in this world. But— but it’s important because the characters, the Todorokis, they’re people. All six of them. They all matter. And that’s what makes this— the story as bad as it is. Because this kind of thing actually happens. And— and it needs to not.”
Yuki looks surprised at his own words.
“I guess? That makes sense. I dunno, I’m not gonna be here for long.” Zach sighs.
“But what gets filmed will. It’ll stay around for long, I mean.” Kayvan says. Evan gets up from the floor.
“Looks like we’ll be doing this again.” he says, looking not overly enthused about it.
“I, uh, promise I won’t try anything this time.” Zach says.
“Sorry for scaring you.” Evan says.
“S’okay. I wonder if Natsuo ever did try something like that.” Zach muses.
“It didn’t— it wouldn’t have ended well.” Yuki says, quietly. “I’ll go, I think. I… I don’t want to watch this scene. No offense.”
“None taken.” Riley tells him. Yuki gives her a weak sort of smile, and looks over the group as Kayvan pushes the vase back into its place.
“Yo, we’re ending our break!” Riley calls to the directors and cameramen; it’s time for everyone to get in their places.
“Don’t worry about it and just do your best, okay?” Kayvan asks, walking over to stand the fake Shouto back up.
“I’ll make sure he does.” Allie says, tugging on Zach’s sleeve.
“My best?” Evan asks, and Kayvan still wishes his father will tell him what’s wrong. Tell him what happened.
“Yeah. Your best.” Yuki says. A moment passes, interrupted only by the sounds of a camera rolling across its rails.
“This is awful.” Evan sighs.
“It could be worse.” Yuki says, shrugging, and Evan splutters.
“Yuki—“
“And on that note, I’ll see you guys later!” Yuki says, waving as he steps backwards out of the set. Evan stares after him.
“What was all that about?” Kayvan asks.
“I guess I can’t stop him if he wants to joke about it.” Evan says. “It’s… it’s complicated.”
“I understand.” Kayvan says, but he isn’t sure, not really. He trusts his father, he does, but God does he want to know what happened. “I’ll, uh, I’ll leave you to it. Have fun.” he says, not really noticing what he’s saying.
“Have fun?” Evan asks.
“Will do!” Riley says, voice cutting over Evan’s. Kayvan sighs.