Chapter Text
"Tubbo, I'm telling you, this is gonna be POGGERS!!!"
"Tommy, no matter how many times you tell me, I do not and will not believe you met Wilbur Soot himself at your work and he just gave you three free tickets to a Lovejoy gig just for being funny with him."
"IT'S TRUE THOUGH, TUBS!!! HE ACTUALLY DID!!! NOW GET YOUR ASS READY TO GO!!!"
"I'm ready to go!" A quieter third voice interjected.
"Good thing you're ready, Ranboo! Just WAITING ON TUBBO!!!"
"GIVE ME A FUCKING MINUTE TO GET DRESSED, BITCH!!!"
"WELL, HURRY THE FUCK UP, BITCH!!!"
Normally, if you were to hear screaming like this from any other small apartment, you'd likely think someone was being killed or a terrible fight was happening. Though, to be honest, in this sad part of the district of Logstedshire, which bordered the poorer side of the City-State of L'Manberg and the ghost town Pogtopia, no one really cared. But no. This was a daily interaction between Tommy and Tubbo, two best friends that love to hate each other in a joking manner. Almost like brotherly banter.
A curly haired brunet stepped out of a small, dimly lit bedroom, bleached tips curling slightly over green eyes, a black shirt with the word 'Lovejoy' painted on with bleach, a pair of tan cargo pants, and a pair of black boots completing his look.
A certain blond barista wearing a red and white baseball tee, an unzipped maroon hoodie with a small Lovejoy logo glanced up at his roommate and grinned, leaping off of the ratty couch he was impatiently sitting and waiting on before immediately bolting to their front door, where a tall and lanky teen stood and waited for the both of them.
Sunglasses sat on his face covering their eyes, a split colored mask covering the lower half of their face, the tips of his dirty blond hair dyed to match the mask: white tips on the right and black tips on the left. A black hoodie, a white pleated skirt, and a pair of mismatched black and white sneakers finished their look for the night up.
"Come on, Tubbo! We're gonna be late if we don't get moving right now!" The blond, Tommy, shouted, practically pushing his taller companion and shorter companion out the door with a boisterous laugh, grinning from ear to ear as he dragged his two best friends out of the small apartment. When they got down to the street, Tommy whistled loudly at a passing taxi, flagging the bright yellow vehicle down. It cruised up and stopped in front of the trio of teens, who piled into the back as the blond quickly said the address.
"16250 North Prime Road!" The driver, who wore an odd looking pair of 3D glasses and was very bald despite looking so young, nodded and began to slowly pull out into the streets. After a few minutes of the teens frantically updating their socials on where they would be in silence, the brunet of the trio leaned towards the blond after glancing up at the driver, whose plaque attached to the center console said his name was Jack Manifold, a shit eating grin on the boy's face.
"Hey." Tubbo whispered into Tommy's ear, trying to keep his voice down to avoid the driver, Jack, hearing them. "Doesn't the driver look like you could smack him with one of those sticky hand things we played with as kids and it would actually stick to that massive bald head of his?" Tommy snorted and slapped a hand over his mouth as he desperately tried to contain his laughter, his whole body shaking from his bout of silent cackling. A horrendously offensive joke entered his mind and, in a typical no brain-to-mouth filter Tommy fashion, he whispered the joke back.
"Do you reckon that if he stood in the sunshine, the light would reflect so much off of his head that people would think that Prime Above is coming back?" Tubbo snorted and, unlike his blond friend, couldn't contain his laughter, cackling at the joke as Tommy joined in. Ranboo, on the other hand, simply chuckled and shook their head, radiating disappointed, but entertained, parent friend energy.
"What's so funny, lads?" Jack asked, his dark eyebrow raised in confusion at the random fit of laughter coming from the back of his taxi. Though he had a sneaking suspicion what they were goofing around and joking about.
"N-Nothing sir. Just making some jokes." Tubbo sputtered out amidst his laughing fit.
"Mhm... well, I reckon myself a bit of an enjoyer of jokes. Why not share with the rest of us?" Ranboo glanced towards his friends with the biggest "You messed up" energy radiating off of them.
"U-Umm..."
"If it's about my bald head, I've heard them all. So shoot. I might actually laugh at them." Jack said with a smirk, glancing back in the rear view to see the relief wash over the two teens. Tommy grinned mischievously.
"So, do you know those sticky hands people played with as kids? Would they stick to your bald head or slide off?" Jack snorted and chuckled to himself.
"The funny thing about that is my old high school mate Wil has done that exact thing to me. And the best part? They did stick." The taxi filled with the sounds of laughter from all the teens in the back, Ranboo finally joining in the playful banter. After Tommy calmed down, he grinned at their bald driver before he cracked another joke.
"Don't get offended by this, but do you reckon, if you stood out in the open sunshine, the light would shine off your head so blindingly bright that they'd think you're the second coming of Prime Above?" Jack began to cackle with laughter, pulling up to the place where the show was happening.
"I'm fucking using that one, that's hilarious! Anyways, lads, hope you have fun! This ride's on me. Kids ride free anyways. Have a good night!" Tommy playfully glared and flipped off Jack, muttering that he wasn't a kid, he was a Big Man before the three piled out of the bright yellow vehicle. Said vehicle slowly pulled out of the crowded parking area and peeled off once they were out.
Tommy turned to look at the venue and grinned when he spotted a head of curly brown hair by the side of the building, his face glowing a faint orange from the lit cigarette hung from his lips. He was idly chatting with a snow haired woman, a pair of cat ears twitching lightly on her head as she glanced up and smiled at Tommy.
"Wilbur, I think you have a fan who wants an autograph." She said to him, honey brown glancing up and meeting bright blue, a grin stretching across the brunet's face at the sight of the very familiar blond.
"Wilbur!"
"Tommy!"
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Wilbur sat behind the curtains on the stage, idly tuning his guitar as he watched the other members of Lovejoy tune their appropriate instruments, or in Mark's case, idly playing practice rhythms on his drums. Ever since he had heard that teen, Tommy, humming Perfume, he's had the tune stuck in his head like superglue.
He idly strummed a few chords from the song and smiled when he felt eyes on him.
"You know it's rude to stare at someone without saying anything, darling." He glanced up and met the icy blue gaze of his long-time girlfriend, Nova, who happened to own the bar and tended the venue for gigs and events like tonight. The feline eared woman purred softly as she strode towards her boyfriend from her place at the bar to where he sat with his long leg hanging off of the stage, giving him a loving kiss on the cheek.
"I can't help but stare, my songbird." Her Las Nevadas accented voice always brought a tender smile to Wilbur's face, his heart fluttering at the loving smile she also shared with him. "You look good on stage, so how can I resist?"
"You flatter me, darling." She giggled softly before her loving smile and warm, loving gaze grew mildly serious.
"You look tense, my love. Need a cig? Might help you relax before the gig." He knew what that was code for. She wanted to talk about work stuff. He sighed tiredly before smiling and shaking his head.
"My snow queen, I'm not feeling up for a cig at the moment."
"I really think you need one." Her insistence must have meant it was very important. He sighed and pulled out a pack of cigarettes. With a quick shout of "be right back, mates!" and a wave of acknowledgement from his band mates, Wilbur followed Nova outside towards an alleyway. Thankfully, it was early enough that there weren't many Lovejoy fans eagerly waiting outside for the gig to start, so he was able to slip by with ease.
"So what is it, Lynx? You know I can't exactly talk about work when I'm dressed like this." He asked as soon as they were 100% sure they were alone. He dug into his pocket and pulled out a beaten up pack of light cigarettes, pulling out one and resting the filter in his mouth.
"I have some information for your family, Mel. Information that could possibly be regarding a certain lost family member of yours?" His eyes widened at her words, that unlit cigarette hanging from his lips almost falling unsmoked to the ground as he began to frantically assault the woman with questions.
"What about him?! Were you able to find him?! PLEASE tell me you found him!! Prime Above, if you found out who took him, I swear to the fucking gods I'll kill the-"
"Wilbur." Her soothing, but stern, voice cut him short before he could frantically ramble any further, giving him a moment to catch his breath before she continued. "Darling, all I know is the heroes have suspicions about some new vigilante being tied to you guys based on one of his powers. Considering wings run in your family, I figured that was noteworthy. Keep an eye out for winged vigilantes."
"Well, there's that new kid... Icarus... he has wings... but that could mean anything. Sure, wings run in the Soot family, but that doesn't mean it's exclusive to our bloodline..." As he spoke, he took a moment to light his cigarette using the smallest explosion he could manifest with his right hand and took a deep drag, letting the burning smoke cling and coil to his lungs before slowly exhaling, white smoke swirling from his lips with a distinct smell lingering behind. He lightly coughed before clearing his throat and gesturing for his snow haired girlfriend to continue, her feline tail flicking gently behind her.
"That might be him, so keep an eye on hi-" she stopped abruptly as her feline ears perked up, twitching lightly as a car door was slammed and tires squealed as a yellow taxi peeled off. Her expression changed when she saw someone and smiled.
"Wilbur, I think you have a fan who wants an autograph." She stepped back and his eyes glanced to where she was, unable to help the grin from stretching across his face at the sight of the barista from that Café, Tommy. He'd made it! And he brought his friends!
"Wilbur!"
"Tommy! So glad you could make it, man!" Wilbur dropped his half smoked cig and stomped out the cherry, offering a fist bump that the blond reciprocated. "Come on! I can get you three inside early to snag some good spots and to meet the band if you want!" The looks on Tommy's friends' faces were priceless; they looked so shocked that Wilbur Soot knew their friend. Nova gently brushed a finger over his shoulder and kissed his cheek.
"I'll see you inside, love. Break a leg tonight."
"Thank you, darling. See you inside." Wilbur gave her a loving kiss before she strode away, confidence radiating off of her in intoxicatingly addictive waves. Wilbur sighed with a smile, watching her walk away before clearing his throat and gathering his thoughts. He beamed at the grinning and practically shaking Tommy and his slack jawed friends, turning to the entryway of the alley and making his way over. When he noticed he wasn't being followed, he glanced behind himself and chuckled.
"Well? Are you coming?" He asked before the three frantically followed after him, grins on two of their faces and excitement radiating off of the mask wearing third. "So, wanna introduce me to your friends, Tommy?"
"I'm Tubbo! This is Ranboo! So you actually met Tommy at his work and you gave him free tickets to this gig?" The brunet, Tubbo, asked, practically bouncing as he walked.
"Yep I did! Your buddy here is a fucking riot, and I happened to hear him humming Perfume, so I couldn't help but give a fan of my band's work free tickets for him and his friends!" Tommy puffed up with pride at the compliments and grinned.
"Of course you found me amusing! I'm Big Man Tommy! Everyone finds me amazing and cool and swag! Especially the ladies!"
"Tommy, you're ace. You aren't even interested in ladies." Tubbo deadpanned, shaking his head with a smile at his dumbass friend. Tommy scoffed.
"I don't know WHAT you mean, Big T! I'm not ace! I love women!" Ranboo sighed and shook their head, almost-brown blond hair shifting slightly as he did.
"Tommy is not aro, Tubbo. He can still like women and not wanna sleep with them. Heck, he can like men and not wanna sleep with them!" Tommy smirked at Tubbo and stuck his tongue out while they continued to follow Wilbur, who chuckled and shook his head.
"Nothing wrong with being ace! My brother's aroace, so you got a big ace ally here." He gestured for the three to head inside and gave a thumbs up to the bouncer at the door, who saw the three teens with Wilbur and nodded in response. Tommy grinned and sprinted ahead, cheering with excitement that his friend Tubbo immediately joined in on. Wilbur chuckled at their chaotic energy and grinned, whistling to get his band's attention. All three looked up from what they were doing and gave Wilbur a confused look.
"Wil, who are they and why are they in here before doors?" Mark asked, Ash silently nodding in agreement.
"So you know that Lovejoy fan I told you lot about? The one who worked at that little cafe in that bookshop? Yeah, this is him-" He gestured to Tommy. "-and these are his friends. Tommy, Tubbo, and Ranboo." He pointed at each of them as he said their names. "Lads, this is Mark, Ash, and Joe! But I'm sure you knew that already." He laughed and walked back up to the stage, heaving himself up and picking up his guitar. He grinned and gestured for the teens to come closer to the stage. "Doors are about to open, so be glad you got here when you did! I gotta head backstage real fast, so hang out here! Enjoy the show!"
The brunet grinned before he strode away, heading to the curtained off backstage area. He could hear the excited chatter of Tommy and his friends as they all talked, their voices soon getting drowned out by voices outside the pub. His guitar sat heavily on his back, but he didn't care. The weight reminded him of the fun he was gonna have tonight and the lost voice he was gonna have the next day. A lost voice he welcomed. Music was his language and by the fucking gods if he wasn't fluent in it. Wilbur spotted his acoustic and grinned, grabbing the yellowish instrument and strumming a chord. He spent a few minutes practicing idly, humming the tune to his solo song Your New Boyfriend when he noticed Ash poke his head back to the backroom. The silent man nodded his head towards the stage, the loud sounds of people talking reaching Wilbur's previously distracted ears. He smiled and stood up, taking his acoustic with him.
"Show time?" Ash nodded and smiled before heading back on stage, the roar of cheers from the audience damn near deafening. And it only got louder as Wilbur himself walked on that stage, lights shining down on him as he grinned, waving at his audience before he walked up to the mic.
"HOW ARE WE DOING, ROSE AND ICE?!" The screams of the audience were music to his ears, a bright grin on his face as he scammed the crowd, spotting Tommy and his friends right up against the stage, grinning back at him. "We are Lovejoy and its so fucking good to see you all out here for another sold out show!!!" The audience roared again, Tommy's voice standing out to the singer due to his proximity. "Let's get this show on the road! How does Concrete sound to start this shit?!" Another scream and the clicking of Mark's drumsticks rang in his ears as they started playing the song.
Time flew as he belted out song after song, pure joy radiating off of him as he played like he never played before and sang with his whole heart. The audience was eagerly singing along, including to unreleased songs that they had learned the words to. As the last note of The Fall rang out and echoed, loud cheers echoed around the building. Wilbur was sweating and his grin was ever present. He pointed the mic away and turned to his bandmates, mouthing 'one more song' to them and getting nods of confirmation from the three men and their trumpeters. He faced the mic again and began to speak.
"Alright, Rose and Ice! You've all been amazing! We have one more song for you tonight! This song is one that I've personally had stuck in my head for a good while now because I heard one of you guys humming it in a quaint little cafe attached to a pleasant bookstore I stumbled into recently!" He could feel Tommy's big, shocked eyes on him as he said that, glancing down and throwing a grin directly at him. "With that in mind, this one goes out to Tommy and his buddies Tubbo and Ranboo! This is a little song called Perfume!" The audience screamed loudly at that, Tommy, Tubbo, and Ranboo's screams and cheers standing out among them all. As the music was about to begin, Wilbur gestured Nova onto stage and passed his guitar to her, grinning brightly. She gave him a confused look, but smiled and took the instrument, letting the strap settle on her shoulder while Mark began the rhythmic tapping of his drumsticks. Wilbur gripped the microphone, grinning brightly at his audience and more so at Tommy and his friends, who were all screaming and cheering alongside everyone else, Tommy pointing at himself as he animatedly talked, probably about how he's the reason they're playing Perfume.
Then the music began.
It's 3:45 (AM!)
And I'll just bite my tongue
Update me on your life
And how you've found the one
But I don't like his eyes
And I distrust their name
And I hate their haircut
They look like a prick!
Wilbur pointed the mic in his hand at the audience as they screamed the words 'a prick' back to him.
But it's all the same
It'd be daft of me to cry
Your tongue is razor sharp
I miss when it would find mine
Left your heart on standby
By the way he holds you
Bet he serenades you
I can't really blame you...
Wilbur grinned at the fans closest to him before kneeling in front of Tommy and pointing the mic right at him. "SING IT, MAN!" Wilbur shouted as Tommy's jaw dropped in shock, pointing at himself with the obvious silent question of 'me?!' ever present on his face. A nod from the brunet was all the blond needed before he grinned and was belting out the words to the chorus with a surprisingly good singing voice.
And I can still smell her perfume!!
Did it rub off on you?!
And I can still smell her perfume!!
Did it rub off on you?!
Wilbur leaned closer to the mic and began singing with his new friend, unable to contain his grin the entire time.
You say your ex-boyfriend's a policeman
Well, I say you need better standards.
You say your ex-boyfriend's a policeman.
Well I. Say. You. Need. Better. StanDARDS!!!
Wilbur grinned at Tommy and pulled the mic away to continue singing alone.
It seems like all our friends
Abruptly fell in love
And she was in the dust
Stalling, life was streaming past
So she learnt to lie
She learned how to pretend
A drama in the futile
A means to an end
Why can't you be a dick?!
Why must you be so nice...?
It's hard for me to move on
When I don't really hate you...
As Mark and Joe echoed the "I don't really hate you" into their own microphones, Wilbur held his hand out to Tommy, who grinned, took Wilbur's calloused hand, and grabbed his friend Tubbo, who then grabbed Ranboo in surprise, as Wilbur hauled all three of them on stage with surprising strength, grabbing another mic and tossing it to them, watching with gleeful amusement as Tommy fumbled and almost dropped it before he got a firm grip on the tech, passing the mic to Tubbo before leaning into Wilbur's mic. He gestured to them before he and Tommy started singing once more.
And I can still smell her perfume
Did it rub off on you?
Tubbo and Ranboo eventually caught on and began singing too, relaxing and having a great fucking time as the quartet were singing their hearts out.
And I can still smell her perfume
DID IT RUB OFF ON YOUUUU
As Nova jammed on Wilbur's guitar, the four jumped around stage, hyping the audience up as they screamed and cheered, singing along to the instruments, as is common with Lovejoy fans.
Tubbo grinned and sang out the next short lyric.
It's 3:45
Then Ranboo.
Your taxi's not arrived
And finally, Tommy and Wilbur finished the song in a surprising harmony.
And I don't think that he's coming.