Chapter Text
"Hey, thanks for coming down, Exer. I need help putting these groceries away-" Harry was caught off-guard by his anguished expression. "...Are you okay? I heard yelling when I came in, and you seem...frustrated." He put a hand on Exer's shoulder and looked into his eyes with concern.
Exer coughed and quickly wiped his tears. "I uh-yeah, David and I were just uh watching this sad movie." He forced a smile and chuckled. "David's really getting into it though...we were at this scene where the dog dies and-"
"Alright, I see," Harry grunted, awkwardly avoiding eye contact. He wiped his expression and began speaking hastily. "Anyways, I need you to put these groceries away-David could come down and help you if you want. I lost track of the time at the store and need to leave for the work thing. Lucy helped me bring the them inside so you boys just need to put them away."
"Sure no problem, Dad," Exer said, rummaging through the bags. "Did you get the cat food? I was planning on giving Lucy her dinner while you're at work."
"Oh um...I don't remember," Harry recalled as he walked over to search between the bags with his son. "Ahm...I don't see it. I must've forgotten it since I was rushing at the store."
"Oh...alright," said Exer. He thought for a moment. "I can go out and get some...ya know, at the Smith's Store."
"Oh really? That'd be great!" Harry hugged his son and kissed him on the forehead. "I made dinner earlier, it's in the fridge. Just warm it up whenever you boys are hungry, sounds okay?"
"That sounds great, Dad. I'll see you later," Exer said softly as he hugged him back, his eyes closed and taking in his father's embrace.
"I love you, son."
"Love you too, Dad."
Sneaking one last kiss on Exer's forehead, Harry waved goodbye and jogged out the door.
It was once again only him and David in the house. Exer turned his head and looked at his bedroom. Sigh
"David....?" Exer asked, softly knocking on the door. He paused for a moment; no response. "Ahm...I need to make a quick stop at the store....Y-you can join me if you want, b-but if not then I understand." He choked to hold back the tears that were once again forming. He strained his ears for a reply. Any sign of him would be enough.
"Okay...."
It was a response! Exer raised his eyebrows in surprise and hope. "What does he mean by 'okay' though? Does he mean he's coming or...?" His eyebrows changed to furrow in slight confusion. He decided not to question it, some response was better than no response. The troubled boy hesitantly waited at the door before walking back downstairs to get ready to leave.
"Gosh, why does it have to be the Smith's store?" he thought as he put on his coat and scarf. "What a coincidence..." Exer had nothing against Jackson or his family. For him, it was just slightly awkward-and quite ironic- considering his current situation with David. "What am I even supposed to do when I get back?! He's probably so pissed at me right now..." Exer finished slipping on his boot and stood up, realizing the biggest of his concerns, "Is he right about the diary?"
He reluctantly stood at the doorway with his hand on the doorknob. Exer turned his head with his gaze back upon the bedroom door, waiting. Perhaps David would burst out and embrace him, telling him he was sorry. Perhaps he would rush out and dramatically yell "Wait!" as he'd fumble down the stairs. Perhaps David would shyly open the door and ask if he needed company.
Nothing. Exer sighed as he turned back to the door, wiping at his eyes before walking out into the cold January night.
. . .
He waited for the sound of the front door shutting. David let out a pained sigh and collapsed his head and arms into his knees that were brought up to his chest. "What just happened?" He felt so guilty...he knew he was upset about the situation, but he shouldn't have come off the way he did. "First I crushed his feelings, and now I didn't even go to the store with him when he offered?" David whimpered, "He must hate me now..."
Worst of all, he still couldn't shake away the annoying concern that their whole argument was about. He'd think after going through all that- at least after getting to speak his thoughts about it (a bit too harshly)- then it could finally relieve his mind.
"But nooo, I'm still worrying about the stupid diary! Hell, we didn't even talk about it, we argued about it!" He shook his head. "No wonder I'm still upset about this...I couldn't even have a civil conversation...nothing was discussed there."
Therefore at that moment, David had three concerns to worry about: his rude behavior during the argument, how much Exer probably hated him by then, and still...was Exer's love an impact of the diary?
He felt guiltily helpless. So much had happened, and now he didn't know what to worry about. Thinking about all three of the problems only sent waves of overwhelmingness. David's head strained thinking what to do. Desperately, he looked up and around Exer's room.
The landline.
He scrambled off the floor and nervously grabbed the phone, his hands trembling as he dialed the number. David slowly raised it to his ear with his breathing shallowing, waiting for the other end to pick up.
"Hello?"
"H-hey Brenda, it's me," he choked.
"David! Aren't you hanging out with Exer...why are you calling, what's up?"
His breath hitched, trying to think of what to say. Tears welled once again in his eyes. He swallowed, "B-brenda, I-I messed up."
. . .
Ding ding!
"Hello, welcome to Smith's Store! Ah Exer, it's nice to see you sweetie, how are you?"
Mrs. Smith, Jackson's tía, was at the cash register ringing up a customer.
"Hello Mrs. Smith, I'm doing good, how are you?" Exer inquired as he loosened his scarf.
"I'm glad to hear that, I'm doing well" she smiled warmly. "Ay, mijo, how long were you out in the cold? You look freezing!"
"Oh uhh, well I walked here, I wouldn't want to drive in this weather," he chuckled, motioning towards the window. "But it's alright, I don't live very far anyways." Besides, he needed the fresh air and just to think about what happened. Especially about what David had been talking about.
Mrs. Smith tsked her mouth. "Honey, you know better than to be out there when it's like this. Hopefully the weather calms down when you're finished shopping."
"Right-yeah...well, thank you anyways!" Exer disappeared behind the aisle and began looking.
The shop was on the smaller side, packed with many aisles and a row of freezers in the back. A single anxious employee was within them restocking a shelf. The low-lit panel ceiling lights created a yellow-tint contrast against the night sky.
Whilst Exer was present in the store physically, his mind was absolutely elsewhere, continuing to think about his argument with David. "Was he right?" Exer couldn't tell. Given the information Jackson told him about the diary, Exer didn't know if he truly just wrote something that manifested his feelings for David. "What else did he write about? Is there anything I've done that didn't come from him??" This made Exer sick. He felt as if he barely knew himself thinking about it. Either way though, on the whole of this situation, his concerns remained upon David and his relationship. If only there was a way he could te-
"Agh oop-"
"Ah!! My goodness- I'm so, so sorry!"
Exer had accidentally bumped into the anxious employee as he was lost in thought. She was small and had pale skin, with short mouse-brown hair that was kept back with a red bandana. Her green work vest was worn over an oversized bright-pink t-shirt that was tucked into a baggy pair of washed-out jeans. She was now scrambling on the floor picking up cans that had been knocked out of her hands.
"Hey, it's alright, I'm sorry. I wasn't paying attention," Exer reassured as he bent down to help pick up the cans. He saw her nervous expression that remained on her face. "R-really, don't worry about it. It was my fault."
He softly smiled as he handed her a can.
The employee looked into his face as she took it, blushing upon the eye contact and looking back down. "I um, th-thank you- I mean...it's okay."
Exer awkwardly cleared his throat and stood up. "Erm, by any chance, do you guys have pet food?" he asked.
"Oh- um, I believe so," she said, standing up and peering over the aisle. "Follow me." The employee led Exer a few rows over, tentatively peering down each one. He observed her worried expression slowly growing, so he figured to keep an eye out for the food as they searched in the sake of helping the anxious girl.
"Umm..I believe it should be around here..." she said nervously as she bit her thumbnail looking around.
Noticing it towards the middle of the aisle, Exer chimed in, "Ah, there it is!" He paused to let her catch her breath. "Thank you, I appreciate the help." He wanted to reassure her to help keep her calm.
The employee softly smiled and nodded before walking back to the original shelves she was at.
"Well uh....hope she's doing well," he thought, grabbing the large bag of cat food.
. . .
"That...definitely is a lot to take in..."
David sniffed as he wiped at his tears, letting out a barely inaudible "Mhm."
"But yeah, I see why you're concerned about the diary...and things between you and Exer after your argument," Brenda said.
David had spent the past 15 minutes explaining everything that had happened and what had been on his mind with Brenda intently listening. He always felt safe with her, but after the night he came out to his sister, he knew he could truly tell her anything. This included his vulnerability of admitting his wrong-doings.
"I know, I j-just don't know what to feel after this...Exer must hate me after I yelled at and got angry with him. Plus, with everything that Jackson wrote and it affecting him, we still don't know if his love corresponds with that." David had calmed down a bit after relieving everything off his chest, but he shuddered and felt the truth seeping into him.
"I love him so damn much," he croaked, shaking his head. A fresh round of tears streamed down his face. "And for so long too. You have no idea how ecstatic I was to find out he liked me back."
David pursed his lips inward as he swallowed the heat rising in his throat.
"So, it crushes me to think th-that...he never would have liked me in the first place if it weren't for the diary. Like, he truly had no interest all along, a-and once it was written in, he only started liking me because the stupid diary imposed it." He shook his head once more. "But I messed it up. I lost my temper, and now Exer probably hates me."
Looking upwards as if at her, David pleaded with misty eyes and a shake in his voice: "Brenda, please, what do I do?"
On the other end, Brenda softly sighed sympathetically. Her heart ached for her brother, it pained her to hear him so broken. There was a silence for a few seconds.
"Well...think of it this way, David," she said. "When did you find out about Jackson's diary and the effects it had on Exer?"
"Just a few weeks ago."
"Okay, and something else magic related prior to that?"
David thought for a second. "Well... a few weeks before that, I guess. When we found out about Lucy's magic."
"Alright...and when did Exer learn that Jackson was able to see his magic?"
"I suppose a few months before that."
"Well, in that case," Brenda began, "you can say that especially recently, there have been many things Exer has been learning about his magic."
"Right."
"So...although he's had this magic for so long, he's still learning new things about it, correct? Don't you think it's just as scary for him to be suddenly learning all of these new things? We-hell, not even Exer- don't even know why it's happening, or how it relates to Jackson...but Exer learns from these new situations. He grows. As I said some questions may not be answered, but he tries to learn and move on in the process."
David swallowed, intriguly nodding.
"So I guess you can say that you can't blame Exer for it. I mean he has no control over the situation, but he is still learning and growing." Brenda paused. "In that case...what you can take from this is that you can learn and grow from this situation as well. First, what have you realized from this, David?"
He sighed. "Well obviously that I shouldn't lose my temper...but like you said, Exer can't control anything about the diary, so I can't get mad at him about that." David thought for a second. "As well as, this is a lot of stress for him, but he's taking things at his own pace to regulate the stress, and he's growing during the process, which is important." Even David was impressed with himself. Brenda was good in these types of situations with him; she never directly implied things, but helped David realize it for himself.
"That's great," she warmly grinned. "There's one more thing, however."
David braced himself.
"Let's say that theoretically Exer did gain interest in you because of something Jackson wrote in his diary," Brenda tiptoed around her words as not to say anything wrong or hurtful. "If you think of it this way, you and Exer have cared so much for each other even before you guys started dating."
David nodded. Even before he became romantically interested in his best friend, they still looked out for each other and meant the world to one another. This included their platonic love prior to their romantic relationship.
"So...I like to think that his love wasn't created...but just enhanced. Exer saw deeper into you; the diary opened his eyes to see you in all of your beauty. It didn't force him to love you, David, it made him realize his love for you.
A tear plopped from David's face onto the nightstand, soaking in Brenda's words. It struck him into a staticky silence that picked up on the phone.
"A-are you okay?" his sister asked.
He cleared his throat. "Y-yeah...go on."
"Alright," she continued, "but...that's not all the most likely anyways."
David's heart dropped.
"Because...a magic diary isn't needed to make anyone fall in love with you, David," Brenda smiled with reassurance. "That's why I believe the diary didn't help influence Exer, because he could have easily saw your true beauty without it. It's really not difficult, David. You're charming, sweet, compassionate-and well, he can list the rest," she chuckled. "But either way though, with or without the diary, it is possible for Exer to see you within."
David's breath hitched as he was shocked into silence once more. His brain felt as if a puzzle was being put together as he processed the information. Everything Brenda had said...he never thought of as a possibility. Of the weeks upon weeks of worrying about the situation, positive outcomes never came across his mind. David only expected the worst. The hope and reassurance of Brenda's words overwhelmed him.
"You really think so?" he croaked with a wet sob. Tears surged from glistening eyelashes down his damp face.
"I can't make definite promises, David," Brenda sighed, "but coming from you two, I know it is the most possible. I've got faith in you guys."
Her brother sobbed once again; that was all the comfort and reassurance he could ask for, even if it wasn't a set answer.
"Th-that's okay Brenda, thank you," he sniffed. "Really, thank you. I've felt so lost during this and I had no idea what to expect. At least I have something positive to look at out of this situation."
"Of course, it makes me happy to help you," she softly said. "Plus, as you already know, I'm always here for you, no matter what happens."
David wiped his face and smiled. "I know sis, and I'm always here for you too...no matter what."
"No matter what," she repeated, grinning. There was a comfortable silence for a few seconds between the two, just appreciating one another. Brenda sighed before breaking it, "Okay, well, I'll leave you and Exer to it then...whenever he gets back. Let him know what you learned. But enjoy yourself, tonight. Call me if you need anything."
"Thanks Brenda, I will," David said. "I love you."
"I love you too."
Beeeeeep
. . .
"Ooh, chocolate." Exer was in the check-out line as he remembered how much David enjoyed chocolate bars. He took one off the mini-rack and put it on the grocery belt. He still couldn't tell whether he was in the wrong or not, but calming David with a chocolate bar wouldn't hurt anyways. After all, he couldn't stand seeing him in such pain.
"Did you find everything alright, Exer?" Carol sweetly asked as the man before him finished in line.
"Yeah, it was all good, thanks," he softly sighed.
Then, there was a clank followed by an "Oops!"
Carol and Exer jolted their heads towards the noise to find the shy employee in the aisle quickly picking up a can.
Exer chuckled. "Is she uhh new around here? I don't think I've seen her here much recently."
"Yeah, a bit," Carol said as she scanned his items. "Her name is Katherine, and I believe she's just a bit younger than you. Mr Smith and I hired her a few weeks ago. Katherine can be quite...anxious, and..nervous, but she has a good heart." The two remained watching her as she tentatively stocked the shelves. "I'll say she definitely is one to double check herself. There's hardly anyone at the store, but I believe the pressure still just builds up."
Exer nodded. He could sympathize for Katherine, he remembered his first few nerve-wracking weeks working at the café.
"But, when I first interviewed her, she told me about her interests. Did you know she's a musical prodigy?" Carol asked, looking over at Exer.
"Oh seriously, how?"
"That girl can play practically anything on the piano and cello! Apparently she had been learning them ever since she was little. Katherine played a few pieces for me last week, she's mind-blowing," Carol said. "And get this: she told me that the orchestra downtown invited her to play with them for their upcoming concert, and that they'd give her a tour of the university since they're interested in having her!"
"Get out of here!" Exer whistled. "That's crazy! When will she be playing then?"
"Well...she declined the offer," Mrs. Smith sighed. "She said she didn't trust herself. I agree she is quite young, but the orchestra reached out to her! They want Katherine to play with them!" Carol tsked. "But alas, she told me how great the offer was, yet she couldn't muster the courage to face it...she just didn't have faith."
Exer cocked his head as he fully turned back to Mrs. Smith. He oddly felt as if this could apply to him.
"I didn't get the chance to tell her, but as soon as I will, I'm going to tell her that it's alright to be afraid. That it's okay to be unsure of yourself. But once you've grounded yourself, you can use that to step forward and decide your next action. For Katherine, whether that being playing with the orchestra or deciding not to. But that is her choice anyways. Although, I do have that gut feeling that she's destined for greatness...and I know she does as well. She just...needs to take that step forward and follow what feels right."
Exer blinked. All of what she said...could this be true?
"Y-you're right! I-she does!" he slowly realized as he raised his head up and stared wide-eyed at Carol. "She doesn't know the heck what to do, b-but...she just needs to trust in herself, and follow her gut..."
Carol stared with wide-eyes back at Exer in confusion. She had no idea what was going on, but apparently he had taken what she said to heart.
"Shi- I mean, sugar...I gotta go back!" Exer shoved the candy bar into his pocket, grabbed his change and quickly hauled the bag of cat food off the counter. "Thanks a lot, Mrs. Smith! Tell Katherine I give her my best reg- nah screw it-" he slighty raised his voice so she was able to hear from down the aisle, "KATHERINE! Keep doing what you do, you're doing great! I believe in you, alright...and I think you should find that in yourself as well!" He ran to the door and exited, "See you guys!" After the resonation of the bell, the store was in complete silence.
"You mean he really does believe that I stock the shelves well?" Katherine asked Mrs. Smith hopefully as she turned her head towards her.
"We'll-we'll talk about it, sweetie."
. . .
David sighed as he set down the phone. He lifted his head and looked around Exer's room, taking in the setting: numerous posters strung across his walls, his electric guitar and amp displayed next to the window, the TV propped upon Exer's dresser across from his bed, the acoustic guitar still laying on the bed with the case strewn on the floor in front of it-
The guitar.
Exer teaching him the instrument felt like something that happened days ago to David. He was reminded of the care-free time they had together before...well, things went down.
"Might as well put it away..."
David walked over and picked up the case, laying it on the bed. This caused a photo to fall out, landing face-down on the floor.
"Oh-" he said, picking it up and flipping the photo over. He was caught off guard by what was presented. The image shown was of him and Exer together. David was laughing with his head slightly tilted, eyes closed and a wide open grin. Exer was laughing along with him with a sly expression looking at his boyfriend. They both had a light blush upon their faces...including smudges of brown. David immediately remembered the time a few months back when they made cake together.
"Hey-don't get that on me, you jerk!" David laughed.
"Oh yeah, or what?" Exer playfully touched his index finger to the tip of his boyfriend's nose, leaving a spot of frosting.
"Why youuu-!" David reached out and wiped his finger tips across Exer's cheek, leaving four brown smudges.
The two laughed as they went back and forth at each other, playfully getting one another with the chocolate frosting. Exer's sides hurt from the giggling, likewise David being red as the sunset. Sitting across on the counter, Lucy rolled her eyes.
Once they calmed down, Exer began wiping his hands. "Oh right- I left my camera down here earlier, let's take a photo!" He aimded it with one hand and cupped David's cheek with the other.
"What the-hey!" he laughed, noticing the cold touch of frosting on his finger tips. He pushed off Exer's hand before he slyly took the photo.
Butterflies flew through David's stomach at this memory. If he were to recall...the photo was taken the weekend he stayed at Exer's when his father found out about his magic. As well as...the weekend the two started dating. David's eyes widened, realizing this was their first photo as a couple together. But immediately, he warmly smiled. "Our first photo."
Getting back to what he was doing, David opened the case. He picked up the guitar and carefully set it inside, noticing it sat uneven on the end. His eyebrows furrowed in slight confusion. "What the..." He lifted the end of the guitar, and sat underneath it was an open baggy of more photos.
"Huh..." David pulled out the bag and watched as the numerous photos of...him and Exer fell to the bottom. "Wait-" he reached inside and took out a few. There was one with him, a photo of him and Exer, another of the two, an additional one of just David...
He reached inside and pulled out the rest. Yup, all photos were either of just David or him with Exer: one photo with the both of them in Exer's room...one at the diner of David smiling happily, holding a milkshake...one at their forest picnic of David looking out into the lake...a photo of the boyfriends making silly faces together...a photo of David's captured excitement from when they went to the arcade...a few images from the photo booth at the arcade...
He shuffled through the other numerous photos. David recalled that at almost every moment when Exer pulled out his camera, that photo was safely kept within the bag (except for the occasional ones Exer kept in his locker, folders, wallet, etc.).
A wave of warmth washed over him. Seeing all those photos reminded David of the loving times the two had together. The two looked so....happy in the images. Each one capturing their bright faces or peaceful intimacy.
He couldn't help but cherish Exer's admirable face and smile in the photos. The way he beamed at his lover/the camera with a glint in his golden eyes. Or, the way his head was thrown back laughing, creating wrinkles near his eyes-showing genuine enjoyment. David felt mesmerized getting to appreciate his boyfriend's beauty. This side of Exer was typically only brought out when they were together.
"He looks so happy" David smiled to himself. "We look so happy"
Seeing all of these images had David thinking about how he couldn't look at a single photo and agree that either one of them didn't love the other. Awareness was brought to him about the true affection their relationship was built upon. He knew for sure that obviously he was in love with Exer. As for his boyfriend...well there was no denying it. But what about their beginning? What if Brenda was wrong that the diary didn't influence his feelings? Furthermore, what if she was wrong about her expectation, that instead Exer's feelings were truly enforced rather than enhanced?
David sighed softly. He gently put his fingertips as to brush his boyfriend's cheerful face in the photo. Whatever the case was, he knew that as of currently, Exer loved him. The flirting, the holding of their tender hands, the compassion, the loyalty, the soft kisses they'd share...it was all still going strong with pure admiration. Was worrying about their beginning worth the stress if they knew that what they had going on currently was already gratifying? It isn't important what started it...or what could possibly end it...what's important is that they're happy together in the moment.
"So then what's the point for worrying about the past...when what really matters is us now?"
Suddenly, a crash of the front door rapidly opening was heard from downstairs.
"DAVID!"
The boy jumped up and faced the closed bedroom door.
Exer was back.