Chapter Text
1. The Morning After
“Adam,” Orla began with a knowing twinkle to her eye. “You’re blushing.”
Adam pressed a hand to his warm cheek and ducked his head. “Uh, I guess I am?”
Orla’s smile grew. “Care to share what’s got you blushing?”
It was the morning after everything. Confessions. Intimacy. A long night of desperate touches melting into an early morning of whispered secrets. Adam had been blushing since he woke up naked in Ronan Lynch’s bed. He blushed when they made breakfast together and Ronan touched his lower back gently to pass behind him. He was blushing when he answered the door for Orla and her team, and now he was blushing in his umpteenth solo interview with the show.
“I don’t know, it’s probably just the heat,” Adam managed to say, his voice only wavering slightly. He felt a nervous giggle bubbling up from his throat, but he managed to tamp it down. He was an adult. He was a lawyer for fuck’s sake. He didn’t giggle at his sex life.
But oh , memories flashed to the forefront of his mind and heat pooled in his belly. Ronan’s gentle touch, calloused fingers trailing over sensitive skin, leaving goosebumps in their wake. The feeling of his warm body pressing down on Adam’s, or Adam’s body pressing down on his. Ronan’s hands gripping his back, pulling him closer. Ronan’s mouth worshipping every inch of skin he could reach. Ronan’s tongue and the way he-
“Come on, Adam,” Orla teased.
Adam took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down. He would have time to clear his head when Ronan was in the hot seat, although his interviews never lasted as long as Adam’s did.
Seeing she wasn’t getting anywhere, Orla switched topics. “You spent the afternoon with Blue yesterday. Did anything she said resonate with you?”
Did it resonate with him? Understatement of the year.
Blue knew Adam like no one else did. They dated, briefly, when they were younger, but always remained close friends. They were the type of friends where one glance would communicate a whole dissertation. He was grateful for her for a number of reasons, but he knew he could always rely on her for her honest opinion. Naturally, he had been looking forward to her meeting Ronan.
“Do you like him?” Blue had asked. It felt awkward with the cameras and Orla hovering over them in the very public coffee shop they went to. But he had almost gotten used to the exposure and anxiety of the experience.
“I think so,” Adam had replied. He knew so at the time, but he was nervous to say it outloud, for such a good thing to be taken away, like most things in his life.
Blue hummed, planning her next words carefully. Adam knew that look, had experienced it often enough. He braced for impact.
“I know you started this whole experiment not completely onboard,” Blue began. It was true, he signed up for the show after he lost a bet with Blue. “But you trust my mom and Persephone and Calla.”
“I do.”
Blue nodded again, fingers tracing the outside of her mug. “Do you think you could love Ronan?”
Adam blinked. Already? They only knew each other for such a short while and Adam was a logical thinker, a methodical thinker. He would mull over every problem again and again until he unlocked its true meaning, until it really made sense to him. He wasn’t sure he could answer this question now, so suddenly, so…
Had he ever really been in love? He dated a dozen men and women, had long term relationships throughout undergrad, law school, and post-grad. As soon as his partners would talk about marriage or the future, he would dip. Adam Parrish had his whole life planned out and doing a reality show, signing up for an arranged marriage, was not a part of that plan. Neither was falling in love.
But he felt comfortable around Ronan. Someone who he just met, but who listened and cared and Adam could count on one hand the amount of people he told about his parents in his life - it wasn’t many. And the number who pitied him after the fact outweighed the ones who didn’t. Ronan was gentle and kind and gave him space when he needed it. It was the bare minimum, but something he didn’t really expect. Most arguments in previous relationships ended with expletives and shouting, but the few arguments he and Ronan had ended with space and came back together with curiosity, willingness to learn. He didn’t expect any of this and especially not from a husband he met on a reality show.
They had fun through the awkward camera bits too, hiding from the cameras when they could, rolling their eyes or making quiet snide comments behind the scenes to make each other laugh. It felt easy. Nothing in Adam’s life had been easy.
But did that mean he was in love with him?
“I don’t know,” Adam answered honestly. “It’s been sort of… surreal.”
Blue smiled a knowing smile. “How so?”
Adam sighed, so lost in his own head that he nearly forgot about the presence of the cameras. “It’s been easy. He’s easy to be around and we have a lot of differences but somehow have enough in common that-” his voice trailed off.
He thought of Ronan’s gentle touches, of his searching gaze, of his honesty. He thought of his family and friends welcoming Adam like they knew him for years and not minutes. He thought of the Barns, an idyllic bubble in an area that was one so toxic for Adam, but somewhere he felt at peace. He thought of waking up that morning to a note on the pillow beside him and an ache in his chest like he missed Ronan, throwing on boots and a jacket to search for him in the fields, just to calm his racing heart. He thought of the look of mischief they shared when teasing Blue about Gansey, how they could share one gaze that would communicate more than words would.
“You should see how he looks at you,” Blue interrupted his racing thoughts.
“How does he look at me?”
“Like he loves you already.”
--
2. Decision Day
“So, have you decided?”
Ronan and Adam looked at each other, pressed close on the small loveseat. They held hands, resting on Ronan’s knee. They held hands a lot these days.
The room was warm from the production lights and cameras. Persephone, Calla, and Maura were seated in front of them, heads cocked curiously, assessing, but looking as if they knew the outcome of this day even without their confirmation. Ronan thought maybe their psychic abilities weren’t so far fetched as he used to think.
“Ronan, would you like to stay married to Adam,” Maura asked, “or get divorced?”
They hadn’t talked about it before coming here. Ronan knew what he was going to say, but he didn’t know what Adam decided. He tried not to speculate, he wasn’t sure he could take the rejection. Things had been going well between them since Blue came to visit, since they confessed their feelings, since they pledged to be all-in . But Adam could have easily changed his mind. They still had a lot of differences - what about Adam’s job in DC? What about Adam’s trauma and childhood? Why would he want to come back close to his hometown after everything he’d been through to live with someone he just met? What about Adam settling for a high school dropout farmer-slash-artist when he was a goddamn lawyer?
When he sat and thought about it, Ronan could convince himself that today was the last day he would see Adam. There was no way he would choose Ronan. And it was humiliating to choose to open up his heart, in front of Adam, in front of strangers, in front of cameras and the world, only to be rejected. But he would do it. If there was even a fraction of a chance that Adam would want to stay married to him, then he would take the leap.
Ronan looked at Adam, but Adam was already looking back, eyes searching. He wanted to laugh - as if Adam didn’t know what he had decided.
“I want to stay married,” he said directly to Adam, ignoring the cameras and other people in the room.
Adam smiled, small, guarded, not his normal private smile just for them. Ronan swallowed the lump in his throat, but felt minor relief as Adam squeezed his hand. Ronan closed his eyes and sent up a simple, inexplicable, desperate prayer to God: Please .
“That’s lovely,” Persephone said, drawing their attention back to the room at large. “And Adam, have you made your decision?”
“I have.”
Ronan wasn’t sure he could look at Adam when he spoke, he wasn’t sure he could school his expression to be neutral enough when Adam rejected him. His ears felt stuffed with cotton, his palms were sweaty, his pulse was racing. Somehow he managed to look.
“I um,” Adam looked nervous. Oh, God, why was he nervous? “I just want to say that I didn’t really expect this to go well. Sorry, sorry,” he looked back at the psychics, smiling sheepishly. “Not that I didn’t trust y’all, I just… Reality television is not really… Sorry, I’m rambling. My point is, I didn’t expect this to go well.
“And when we first met, all we could find were the things we didn’t have in common,” Adam looked back at Ronan with a nervous laugh. Ronan felt like he was going to pass out or throw up or both.
“And it was really awkward,” Adam continued, seeming to not notice Ronan’s pain. “But I think as soon as we went on our honeymoon, it was kind of… simple. Everything worked itself out. Even living together wasn’t that difficult and I’ve lived alone for so long I didn’t think it would be that easy, but…
“Sorry, I’m rambling again,” Adam rubbed the back of his neck and let out a breathy laugh. “I didn’t think that this would go well, but it really has.”
Ronan’s mind was wiped clean, no thoughts, only Adam smiling at him, his real, true smile. What the fuck .
“So I want to stay married.”
Brain back online, heart hammering in his chest, Ronan let out a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding. “What the fuck .”
“Language!” He forgot Orla was there.
“What?” Adam asked, squeezing his hand again.
“You asshole,” Ronan laughed. “You drew that out so long-”
“Oh,” Adam said, as if just noticing Ronan’s distress. “Of course I want to stay married.”
“ Of course ,” Ronan echoed with an eye roll.
Adam kissed him, hand cradling the nape of his neck, holding him in place. It was a firm, chaste kiss, but a promise. A comfort. When he pulled back, he rested his forehead against Ronan’s and smiled. “Of course.”
--
3. Reunion Episode
Adam and Ronan had their interviews already, both separately and together. Now they were sitting on a couch with the other two couples of the season, silently watching the drama fly across the room like a tennis match.
The first couple was Piper and Colin. While they seemed to share a lot in common - particularly their snobbiness and materialism - they would not stop arguing. Yelling over each other with passive aggressive comments before dissolving into rather explicit PDA. There were a few times where the producers had to be brought in and consulted on the content-rating of the show. They had decided to stay married on decision day, but today Piper wasn’t sure she made the right decision and announced that she would be filing for divorce as soon as she could.
The second couple was two different women named Ashley - one spelled Ashlee and the other, Ashleigh. They were fighting because one of them wanted to stay married while the other one wanted a divorce and while there were two months between decision day and this reunion episode, one hadn’t gotten over it.
When Ronan first met Adam he thought they would be the drama of the season, but he was extremely mistaken.
“I just don’t understand after everything we’ve been through,” Ashlee was saying, “you don’t want to stay married!”
“You’re a Taurus and I’m a Leo,” Ashleigh sighed, patting her partner’s knee. “It was never going to work.”
Ronan snorted. Adam nudged his foot.
“Ronan! Adam!” Jimi called, trying to disrupt the chaos that was this entire episode. She was the unlucky host of this mess. “You are our successful couple on the show! What is the secret to your happiness?”
Once again, Ronan looked to Adam to take the question. Adam sighed, eyes up to the ceiling, resigned with his role as the communicator in this relationship. Ronan would make it worth his while later anyway.
“I don’t think there’s a secret,” Adam looked back at Jimi with that feigned smile. “We just got lucky.”
“Luck has nothing to do with it,” Piper chimed in, swatting Colin’s hand away as he tried to hold hers. “I’m extremely lucky. I’m convinced that this was a sabotage.”
“A sabotage?” Colin echoed with a laugh. “Do you really think so little of me that we were matched so I could what? Ruin your life?”
Ashleigh leaned over to Adam. “What are your signs?”
Adam looked to Ronan and back. “Uh, I don’t know?”
Ronan rolled his eyes. “Scorpio and Cancer.”
“How do you know that?” Adam asked in amazement, but Ronan just shrugged.
“Ah, see?” Ashleigh turned back to Ashlee. “They’re both water signs. Strong bond. Can’t break it.”
Ashlee wailed. “But–”
The chaos continued and they were unsure if there would even be any usable footage at the end of this. After a while, Adam leaned his cheek on Ronan’s shoulder and Ronan kissed the top of his head.
“We’re lucky,” Adam murmured, knocking their knees together.
“Yeah, we are.”
--
4. Adam moves in (for real)
In the end, Adam officially decided to move in. Not that it wasn’t official before, but when the cameras stopped following them, Adam had to go back to DC for work. Ronan made the trip up to visit him every week, but that made it hard for him to keep up with the farm and Adam’s condo didn’t allow animals - they both ended up missing Chainsaw. Then the next few months, Adam made the trip down to Singer’s Falls and spent long weekends at the Barns, but the commute and distance were brutal on both of them.
So Adam made the compromise. It wasn’t really a compromise since Adam hated his job and his condo and was looking to move to another practice anyway, but it was convenient timing regardless.
Ronan had beat Adam home from DC; he had just enough time to park his car and let Chainsaw out before Adam arrived. Chainsaw raced over to the UHaul to greet him, happily barking and jumping in front of Adam’s door before he cut the engine and got out. Adam didn’t have much stuff and most of his furniture he had already sold or donated, but he did have a pretty extensive book collection and other items he didn’t want to part with.
Adam fell back from the impact of Chainsaw jumping up and into him. He laughed and held her steady.
“Okay, okay, down, girl,” Ronan called as he approached. Adam’s eyes lit up when they met Ronan’s.
“Hi.” Adam’s smile was wide, unguarded.
“Hi.” Ronan stepped up to press a kiss to Adam’s cheek, hand gentle at his hip. They had just seen each other, had only separated to drive, but this whole day felt surreal. Like any minute Ronan would blink and none of this ever happened.
Adam leaned back against the truck, tugged Ronan forward by the belt loops. “No take-backs.”
“Hm?” Ronan kissed Adam’s temple, stepping in close. Adam smelled like summer and earth and pollen.
“My condo’s sold. My stuff is here,” Adam said. “No take-backs.”
Ronan hid his grin in Adam’s neck, pressing a kiss there, too. “No take-backs,” he agreed.
They kissed against the truck, only breaking apart for breathless, happy laughter. The last few months had been like this - enjoying the privacy and freedom of falling in love, falling hard, falling fast. As soon as the cameras had left them, it was as if the rest of the walls they had built up fell away. They still had trouble opening up about some things, but they gave each other space, communicated when they were able, and apologized when they were wrong. It was all too perfect, Ronan was trying not to look for the catch.
“So I’ll leave you to it,” Ronan said, pulling back.
“Excuse me?” Adam laughed.
“You’re gonna move all the boxes inside, right?”
“You’re not funny.”
Ronan smirked. “You laughed.”
He walked around to the back of the truck and opened it. His eyes widened as he caught sight of something he had not helped Adam load into the back. His brain went offline, mind blank, no words, only trying to compute what he was seeing.
“Uh, Ronan?” Adam seemed to notice his shock, but holy shit Ronan didn’t care. A motorcycle. It was partially covered by a drop cloth to protect it from the other boxes and items inside, but it was undoubtedly a motorcycle. Adam Parrish, his husband, had a motorcycle. And it was so fucking hot.
Adam had driven to visit Ronan over these last few months and he definitely didn’t take this. That car was still in Ronan’s driveway from the last time he visited. He left it and drove back up with Ronan so they could take the UHaul back. That car was modest, an old, barely functioning jalopy, that was Adam’s pet project, something he liked doing to destress from his heavy day job. But Ronan didn’t know Adam’s mechanic hobby included fixing up a motorcycle. Christ, Ronan didn’t even know Adam could ride.
“How did I not know this?” he managed, although his voice sounded wrecked .
“Know what?” Adam followed Ronan’s line of sight to the bike and sighed. “Oh, yeah. Well I didn’t get to ride it much in the city, so it basically just sat in storage. I have to fix it up again probably but-”
Ronan kissed him, hard and desperate. “What the fuck,” he muttered against his lips.
Adam laughed, falling back a step as Ronan collided into him. He held onto Ronan for stability, leaning his head back as Ronan’s lips trailed down his neck. He only put up a little bit of a protest when Ronan started walking them back to the house, full truck abandoned to unload much later that evening.
--
5. Settling down
Adam let his nose lead him to the kitchen. He smelled the fresh spices and roasting onions and garlic from the driveway as soon as he parked his car. As the door shut behind him, Chainsaw bolted out of the kitchen doorway to greet him, circling him happily and sniffing him for hidden treats or smells from the day. He leaned down to give her a scritch behind the ear, recognizing the low crackle of the record player wafting in from the living room.
He had landed a job at a firm closer to Singer’s Falls, still an hour commute one-way, but with the flexibility to work from home when he needed or wanted to. He was grateful to be back, close to Ronan, closer to Blue, despite his anxieties about being closer to Henrietta. It felt like the right choice, everything felt right, calmer, easy.
Ronan was at the stove, wooden spoon in hand, stirring something that smelled delicious. At first glance, Ronan didn’t look like a domestic romantic, but Adam was constantly surprised by him.
“What are you cooking?” Adam asked from the doorway, loosening the tie at his neck.
“Lasagna.” Ronan glanced at him over his shoulder and Adam could see him hide a smile.
Adam kicked off his shoes in the hallway and stepped up behind Ronan, wrapping his arms around his waist and pressing himself to his back. He kissed Ronan’s neck and leaned his chin on Ronan’s shoulder, the stress of the day melting off him.
“Rough day?”
Adam just hummed in reply, but didn’t elaborate. He liked leaving work at work and enjoying Ronan’s company stress-free at home. “What’d I miss?”
“Cat,” one of the barn cats literally named Cat by Matthew, “had her kittens.”
“Finally,” Adam pulled back, heading over to the sink to wash his hands. “How did it go? Is she all right?”
“She did great,” Ronan said, continuing to stir the red sauce, lowering the heat. “Four kittens, all healthy. They’re set up in the barn since she hates the house. Gonna head out there again after dinner and check in.”
“Can I come?”
Ronan rolled his eyes. “Of course you can.”
Adam hip checked him. “Can I help you cook?”
Ronan rolled his eyes again. “Course you can.”
Adam drained the pasta. Together they layered the lasagna and settled it into the oven. Ronan set the timer and Adam grabbed a glass of water. He heard the music stop in the living room so he wandered in to flip the record. When he laid the needle back on the spinning turntable, Ronan spun him around and wrapped his arms around him. As the soft jazz crackled out of the speakers, they fell into an easy waltz, swaying with their arms wrapped around waists, cheeks pressed to shoulders.
It was easy to be with Ronan. They didn’t always need words to communicate. Sometimes they just had this - swaying in an embrace, dinner cooking in the other room, comfortable silence between them. Sometimes Adam would wake from a nap on the couch and find that Ronan draped a blanket over him before heading back out into the fields. Sometimes Ronan would come in after a grueling morning of chores to find breakfast ready and a fresh pot of coffee on warm, Adam already gone for the day. Sometimes Adam would sleepily wander out to Ronan’s studio and drag him inside to rest. Sometimes Ronan would leave hastily drawn sketches on the pillow next to him for Adam to wake up to - some sweet like the wildflowers Adam picker and some lewd reminiscent of their activities the night before. Sometimes they would lay in bed at night, much like the first days they had been together, and whisper secrets in the dark.
Adam sighed, happy, sleepy, content. “I love you.”
Ronan squeezed him a little tighter. “I love you, too.”
Sometimes words were nice, too.
--
+1 One year later
“Do we have to watch this?” Ronan grumbled into Adam’s shoulder.
“Yes!” Noah answered from beside him on the couch, snatching the large bowl of popcorn from them to grab a handful.
Adam’s cheeks were bright red when he leaned over to press his lips to Ronan’s ear and whispered a promise that stopped his complaining almost immediately.
Their friends and family were strewn about the Barns living room, eyes fixed to the large flatscreen. They already finished watching the wedding episode and that was humiliating enough. Ronan didn’t remember whose idea it was to watch their season of Married at First Sight all together as a family, but whoever it was would hear from Ronan later.
Declan and his wife Jordan were sharing an armchair. Declan looked, understandably, mortified at having to watch his brother and brother-in-law interviewed about their wedding with Orla’s suggestive eyebrow wiggling and expertly edited soundbites hinting toward a very different night than they actually had. Jordan constantly shouted her awes to the screen with lots of finger pointing.
Matthew, Noah, Hennessy, and Henry, were making fun of Ronan, which was honestly fair play. Ronan looked sickly green in the first episode, nervous out of his skin, and had acted like an awkward, bumbling idiot.
Gansey was beside them on the couch, Blue lying back against his chest, sitting between his legs. They were a disgustingly happy couple, but in the past year, Blue had said the same about Ronan and Adam. Ronan was too happy to really fight it anymore.
Ronan and Adam were also sharing an armchair, squished together and constantly hiding their faces in each other’s necks and shoulders. And it was only episode one…
“Next episode!” Blue cheered.
“Traitor.” Ronan grabbed Adam’s hand, threading their fingers together, and pressed a kiss to the back.
“Don’t even wait between episodes, just queue up the autoplay,” Hennessy said, reaching for the remote from Noah.
“What’s next?” Matthew asked innocently.
“ The honeymoon .” Ronan wasn’t even sure which four voices answered him, but he was not happy about the giddy tone coming from the group bullying him.
The episode opens with a clip from Adam’s interview in the hotel before they left for the airport; Ronan recognized the room immediately.
“Yeah, I think he’s hot,” Adam said on screen.
Ronan’s jaw dropped and Adam scrambled as the room erupted in chaos.
“ That’s how they started the episode?” Adam groaned, holding up a pillow in front of his face, but Ronan knocked it away.
“Aw, you think I’m hot?” Ronan had a shiteating grin on his face at Adam’s wide eyes and reddened cheeks.
“On the second day!”
“Damn, Parrish!”
“Do we have to watch this?” Declan bemoaned to Jordan, desperate not to watch anymore of his brother and brother-in-law's love story let alone references to their attraction for one another. He was happy for them, but from afar… from further than this hopefully.
“I thought his tattoos were cool,” the Adam on-screen continued; the room continued its chaotic commentary. While his words were nonchalant, his cheeks were flushed and he looked self conscious. Ronan knew intimately that Adam thought more than his tattoos being just “cool.”
“Did you two get up to anything interesting last night?” Orla’s voice was heard off camera. Adam’s blush only deepened, eyes glued to his lap.
“Uh, no, we didn’t… um… did he answer these questions? His interview was so short.”
The show cut to Ronan’s interview, which was admittedly shorter than Adam’s, but only because Ronan Lynch was such a winning conversationalist.
“Do you think Adam is attractive?” Orla asked.
“Sure,” was Ronan’s curt reply.
“Ooh, smooth, Lynch,” Noah shouted, laughing with glee.
“How did you find the first kiss?” Orla again and Ronan forgot how humiliating her interviews had been.
“Uh, it was like two seconds, I don’t know.”
The show cut back to Adam, seemingly answering the same question. “A little awkward, but… I thought it was nice. Kind of… sweet?”
Ronan pinched Adam on the thigh, Adam pinched back.
“I’m with Declan,” Adam said, “do we have to watch this?”
“It’s the story of how you fell in loooooove,” Blue cooed.
“Yeah!”
“Shhhh, guys,” Ronan waved a hand at them all, “I’m trying to hear Adam say more embarrassing shit.”
Adam groaned, pressing his face to Ronan’s neck again. Ronan wrapped his arms around him tighter, kissing the top of his head. “It’s gonna be a long day,” Adam groaned.
Ronan grinned, leaning his cheek against Adam’s head, tucking him in close to his side. “Yeah, it is.”
Surrounded by his family and friends, wrapped up in the arms of his husband, Ronan felt like the luckiest bastard in the world.