Chapter Text
Chapter 5: Mistakes Were Made
Bill groaned, feeling a stiffness settle into his muscles as he finally came to, and being uncomfortably warm where he was. He felt a slight headache knocking on the front of his skull and his eyes barely managing to stay open as he tried to take in his surroundings-
He was in a bed.
He didn’t recognize the room, so most likely he crashed at someone else’s place. Posters littered the wall closest to him and half the ceiling, from lots of bands(which were most likely indie or underground as he couldn’t place any of them), sci-fi movies, and generally paranormal themes.
There was another cozy bed across from them, neat and untouched (most likely the other occupant was out). There was a string of little black lantern lights that decorated the wall, followed by pitch black woodsy decals. There were a couple of music-related items on the furthest corner, like a clarinet and a saxophone, a sousaphone, and a tuba (ironically enough).
Bill also noticed a pair of desks beside each other, but he didn’t feel like inspecting them too much, all he could surmise was lots of clutter and notebooks and school paraphilia.
Once his eyes adjusted to the light he felt more confident in moving-
But found himself unable to move.
A pair of arms held him back, and the person beside him grunted, holding him tighter now-
“Mmmn, nooo…” Dipper quietly protested.
Bill felt his face burn even more at the implication of the situation, wondering how this ended up so badly. Embarrassment drove the blonde to try and shimmy his way out of Pine Tree’s grasp but instead he failed miserably, only managing to drive himself into an even more uncomfortable position while the boy clings to him.
“Pine Tree, let go.” he whisper-shouts.
“Warm. Stay.” is the (tired) caveman answer Pine Tree gives.
Bill huffs but tries not to shriek as he feels skin brush against his bare leg, he had fucking forgotten that he was wearing shorts. With further inspection, he also noted that these weren’t his shorts, as they were appropriate for sleeping rather than the chino shorts he had on yesterday.
Dipper allows him to only shift a bit more, but making sure that the taller man’s back is pressed to his chest. Bill shudders when he feels Dipper settle into the nape of his neck, his warm breath brushing past, only able to lift some of the ends of his blonde hair.
The blonde knows he’s trapped and that moving is gonna be useless. He does enjoy the comforter though, with the galaxy print and the underside being soft and pleasing to touch.
Bill decides that if he’s already doomed to be stuck being the little spoon he might as well try and figure out how much he remembers from the night before, praying that he doesn’t recall anything too shameful...
---9:25pm, The night before---
While Dipper was on his way back home with his potential love interest Mabel was out preparing for not only Friday Movie Night but also Bill Cipher’s 3 Gum Challenge-
“So here’s how it’s gonna boil down, I rifled through the gum wrappers and since most of them come with multiple truth or dares on them I separated them into a truth and a dare pile. We’ll take turns picking people and asking them Truth or Dare. After a random pick the person has to decide either to do the truth or dare or to take a shot.”
The party people nod but the quiet is quickly broken when Pacifica adds, “Wait, can I add another rule?”
“Depends on what it is Paz.”
“Dipper can’t avoid the game by just drinking. Like, the last time we did this he got wasted and that was more embarrassing to deal with.”
Dipper flushes and scoffs, trying to ignore Bill’s high-pitched laughter, “I won’t do that this time, okay? And I took a lot so it’s not like I was a light weight or anything…”
Bill finally calms down and sees everyone’s phones out in a circle between them, “But this is for my gum challenge, right?”
Mabel nods, “Yup! So we’ll actually be recording the truth or dares that are performed and uploading them to Tweeter. So get ready to get wrecked!”
The room was quiet for a moment, with everyone staring at everyone else, and Mabel being the only one in the room that was excited.
“Someone should go first.” she supplied.
Again, Mabel’s comment is met with an awkward silence and everyone looking around avoidantly.
She sighs, “Fine, I’ll go first and then we’ll move clockwise.”
She pulls a paper from the hat-
Truth: Who makes you nervous?
She announces what’s written on the paper and frowns a bit, “No one really makes me nervous, if anything I am the one who makes everyone nervous-”
Mabel notices Paz already following her with her phone and flushes a bit, “I guess Paz used to make me a bit nervous, uhm- cause it seemed like she didn’t really like me. And she death-glared me when I moved in late during freshman year.”
The group laughs and Paz quickly defends herself, “I wasn’t death-glaring you! I was tired and stressed from the move and then you came out of nowhere and I didn’t want to be in the way!”
Pacifica huffs and quickly leans over to give Mabel a hug, unable to see the slight color that blooms onto her cheeks at the sudden affection before taking a slip of paper.
Dare: Run ice down someone’s spine.
She smirks but doesn’t announce her dare, instead going to the fridge to get ice, and Dipper records her-
“So, why do you need ice Pacifica?”
She ignores Dipper’s comment, grabbing a couple of cubes in one hand before quickly moving behind him and lifting up his shirt-
“Aah! What the fuck Pacifica? That was fucking cold!” Dipper yelps out, unable to keep the filming steady as he tries to get away from her cold assault.
“I had to rub ice down someone’s spine, I just thought that you’d be an easy target.”
Bill is snickering and Dipper can’t help but feel not only cold but betrayed. He grumbles and reaches into the hat and scans the paper for his task-
Dare: Ask your mom if she believes in aliens.
Dipper is laughing before he can even announce his dare, going for his phone and trying to compose himself before the dial tone ends. “Hey, mom? Like, I know it’s late but I have to warn you before it’s too late! I was doing some research a-and, no Mom this is serious! They’re coming mom!”
Bill is trying not to bust a rib with how hard his lungs are spasming, using the scarf he stole from Pine tree to muffle his wild, hysterical laughter-
“Mom, ok let me ask you, do you believe in...aliens? Cause if you don’t then I need you to just trust me on this! Mom, they’re real! And they’re coming! Please just, wear the aluminum foil hats from now on, okay?”
Mabel cracks up, her laughter so loud that Dipper is sure his mother can hear it too, and once that comes over his mom sighs, already catching onto their little prank.
“Sorry Ma, go to bed and be careful, ok? We still aren’t sure if there are or aren’t aliens, so let’s just stay on the safe side.”
His mother laughs at their on going joke and tells them to get some rest and stop fooling around. Dipper finishes his goodbye before hanging up, gesturing for Bill to take his turn-
Truth: When do you feel most alive?
Bill stared down at the piece of paper, his expression slipping into something a bit more somber.
It was a good question, to be honest- but he really had no idea how to answer it.
The rest of the room seemed to catch onto the souring mood, and Mabel quickly took her phone to start recording-
“What does it say?” Dipper speaks up, leaning over as his imagination threatens him from within.
“Well, it’s asking when I feel most alive. I...I dunno really. Like I have a moment in mind but I think this is asking for something more general-”
Dipper nods and waits quietly for an answer, and Mabel makes a gesture for Bill to hurry up-
“I guess, when I’m by myself in a really secluded part of nature. Just, existing and enjoying being here. Or when I’m standing up really high after a hike and the wind is blowing hard. There’s just something so powerful about it, and I can’t really describe it…”
Bill flushes and tries to laugh it off, “Uhm, yeah, so I am done, sorry if it was lame.”
The blonde barely manages to maintain control of the heat to his face when he catches Pine Tree giving him a starry-eyed look and whole-heartedly agreeing with his answer, even going as far as to assure him that it wasn't lame at all.
Mabel pulls the next one-
Dare: Shout out the name of the person you love.
She hisses and tries to not get too caught up in thinking about her crush, instead making a motion for Bill to pass her one of the bottles of alcohol-
The group immediately seizes control of the paper and try to figure out why she refuses to answer such a dare-
“I can’t.” and she leaves it at that, tipping her head back to take a shot of Patron.
And at this point of the night Bill remembers everyone avoiding their truths and dares with shots of various alcohols. (If he counted right, and no one was sneaking drinks then he had about three shots, Dipper had four and the girls both had two.) Everyone was trying to outdo the other in terms of ‘strongest drinker’ so they mainly took from Patron and Jagermeister rather than the softer Malibu.
Pacifica laughs and in her drunken haze, dumps out the contents of her purse-
Truth: What’s the strangest thing you carry in your wallet? Upload a pic of it to Tweeter.
“Well, I found a tampon in here, so I guess that works? Unless…” she rummages around a bit more and pulls out a small key chain of a fluffy being with googly eyes and a little beak, somewhat reminiscent of a Furby.
“Mabel gave this to me, so I always have it on me.”
She snaps a picture to upload it and soon Bill is recording Dipper, watching him carefully pick out a paper from the pile.
Dipper scowls at the truth he pulled-
Truth: What part of your body sweats the most?
“I’d rather just take a shot and spare y’all the horror.” he starts, takes a shot of Captain Morgan and crumples the paper. (Whether or not Dipper was doing it to avoid the dare or to get intoxicated, no one could tell, but Mabel notes it so that Dipper can’t go down
Bill sighs and takes a slip of paper and tries to contain his joy-
Dare: Give this to someone else and fill it in: Go to the ____ and ____ loudly.
“I’d rather not write it down so I will tell you what you gotta do, ok?”
The group give him a confused look but wait for his clarification, “Okay so, Dipper, you need to go to the balcony and uhmmm...give a lapdance loudly!”
The girls laugh and Dipper starts trying to get out of it-
“Cmon Dipper! I’ll just be for a little bit! And I promise we won’t videotape this one-”
Bill laughs and tries desperately to remember whether or not Dipper went through with it (cause again, he has no idea).
Something inside him tells him that he must have though, cause then the group progressed as usual, and Mabel tried another one of the papers-
Truth: If you could automatically be good at something, what would it be?
Mabel opens her mouth to answer-
Bill sighs, okay he can’t really remember a lot from last night it seems.
He remembers taking a drink from Paz, who apparently was dubbed the ‘bartender’ since she actually had some experience with mixing drinks. She hands him a cup with lots of cranberry juice and when he asks what it is she replies with, “Don’t worry about it. That is literally what the drink is called.”
Bill remembers asking her what’s in it but he can’t remember whether or not he actually got an answer.
But then, his memory jumps to Dipper and him trying to do this thing called Bachata? It was a dance, but Dipper wasn’t very coordinated at the moment, and to be honest Bill wasn’t either. So they were a giggling, stumbling mess, which the girls (hopefully) didn’t record-
Somehow he recalls Dipper sitting on his lap as they go through some of the responses and hashtags coming up. He recalls some of them, since Dipper had been scrolling through them pretty quickly-
“ #BipperOTP2k15? #relationshipsdoneright? What the fuck is this?” Dipper started, looking a bit appalled at the supplied hashtags, “Oh wait, look at these ones-”
Dipper gave his best impression of a girl, it coming out kinda nasally and squeakier than Bill had expected, “ Okay, #meonoutside #theyrejustfriends #dontshiprealpplguys #meoninside #BIPPERisLOVE #givememoreBipper #AllAboardTheSSBipper !”
The brunette starts laughing like crazy, nearly dropping his phone as he leans against Bill for support, and the girls seem to be egging Dipper on-
“So, you aren’t with him?” Paz asks dubiously, seeing as their set-up was implying something else entirely.
“Nah! He’s just my partner for a project. Seriously though, Bipper? That’s what they call us? Disgusting.” Dipper pouts, opting to instead return to burning the hashes vocally (cause we all know he would never actually confront them online).
“Oh yeah? Entertain this thought-experiment; say that you and Bill were together, and they still called the ship Bipper. Would you change it?” Mabel slurred out, they had long abandoned the Truth or Dare game and instead opted to do whatever stupid shit came to mind.
“Of course.” Dipper huffed out.
Bill could only laugh as Dipper continued cursing out the dreaded ‘Bipper’ label.
The blonde felt the liquid courage in his blood, and coupled with his curiosity and boldness he had to continue, “So what would you call our ship?”
Dipper scoffed, “I dunno, gimme a minute-”
And that’s where the night ended for Bill.
The blonde struggles and struggles to remember what else he can but it’s simply out of his grasp. Instead, he decides that he should inspect the room again, and he finds his phone on a nearby nightstand, charging. He smiles and (thankfully) reaches the phone, unplugging it with one hand and seeing what horrors were pasted last night-
Not much beyond his gum challenge was on Tweeter, and apparently Dipper had gone through with giving him a lapdance to the song “Good For You” and screaming along. Bill cursed, he really did wish he could’ve remember that part, but at least he had evidence of it.
There were just a couple more truths and dares after that but that was the end of it.
He nearly sighed with relief, until he saw over 50 notifications on his snapchat.
Then, he was fucking sweating bullets .
Apparently, Pacifica thought it was easier to post all their debauchery and idiocy on snapchat, taking videos and such. The blonde was already starting to feel uneasy(he really hopes it’s not queasiness from the hangover), but he couldn’t stifle the curiosity. He made sure his phone volume wasn’t too loud, but even so it seemed that Dipper was dead to the world.
He clicked the first video from MysterysAndBooks (aka Dipper)-
Bill was on camera, shoveling down Doritos like crazy, but kinda laughing at the same time? Bill was going on and on about, “Doritos are so GOOD! Like, SO GOOD! I WOULD FUCK A DORITO IF I COULD. FUCK, I-” And then Bill starts choking on the spicy tortilla chips, and he’s dying and all you can do is hear everyone laughing in the background-
“I inhaled a Dorito! I inhaled a fucking Dorito! Ha hahahahaha!”
And that was the end of it. Dipper’s sense of humor required the banner, #DeathByDoritos #InhalingDoritos #BillWantsToFuckDoritos .
Bill wanted to die already and he’s only seen one of the videos.
GlitterRainbowsAndUnicorns (Mabel) also sent him a couple of snaps, the first one is of Dipper and him-
“Mabel, no I don’t wanna do this!” Pine Tree whines, while Bill is awkwardly standing in the shot beside him.
“You never want to do anything Dipdop! Cmon and just do it, you made me and Paz kiss, so you guys gotta do it too!”
Dipper groans, “Fine, you should be glad I feel bad for making it awkward for you two.”
Bill simply waits for Dipper to face him, and they take a moment to collect themselves, before Dipper places a hand on Bill’s neck, pulling him down so they can start getting closer. Bill tilts his head a bit, and offers a shy smile and Dipper starts laughing-
“Oh god, don’t do that!” Pine Tree yells, his voice jumping to a pretty high octave.
“I’m not doing anything!” Bill complains, and manages to keep a hold on Dipper, not letting up even as the shorter male struggles.
Dipper turns his face towards the camera and boy, is he blushing hard . The poor embarrassed boy seems to be unable to keep it together-
“You’re smiling! It’s weird and it’s making this more intimate than it needs to be!”
Bill laughs and hugs Pine Tree tighter, and unfortunately the snap cuts off there. Bill finds himself both relieved and sad that the kiss didn’t seem to happen, but instead continues forward-
The next one is a snap with just Dipper alone at their granite island, Dipper is on his phone and scarfing down some croutons-
“So bro-bro, you never finished naming your ship!”
Dipper shrugs, “So? It’s not real so it’s kinda pointless.”
“But they still call you and Bill’s ship Bipper, even if it isn’t real! Cmon, maybe you can at least get it to something you like.”
Dipper scowls at the mention of ‘Bipper’, “You’ve kinda got a point.”
He looks straight into the camera and laughs, “Ok, why not...Chip and Dip?”
“What?! Chip and Dip? Like I get Dip, but how is Bill chip?”
“He said he’d fuck a dorito.” Dipper is trying to stop his laughter from coming out, “And he inhaled a Dorito, so I’mma always associate chips with him.”
Mabel is dying and the camera is shaking with her convulsions, and Dipper adds, “Or maybe like something with our last names, cause Cipher is a pretty wicked last name and I wouldn’t mind taking it.”
Mabel gasps, “YOU’RE GONNA TAKE HIS LAST NAME IF HE MARRIES YOU?!”
Dipper is bright red once again at the implication, “N-NO! I JUST THINK IT’S A COOL NAME.”
The snap ends but it’s followed by three images flashing through, Bill kissing Dipper’s cheek and the banner reading #CipherPines , Dipper kissing Bill’s cheek with #ChipAndDip , and the final one of them in an lip-lock featuring #LetsGetThisOnAShirt .
Bill wants to scream and he clicks through the last snap to skip it, quickly going back and screenshotting all of those photos, fuck consequences, HE KISSED DIPPER AND THEY HAVE SHIP NAMES TO GO WITH IT. His heart was fluttering and he felt like throwing up (but not really), and he couldn’t help but want to squirm and die.
Dipper huffs and lightly headbutts him and Bill feels a thrill run down his spine, and he goes still so he can return to his snapchat.
The last one from Mabel features them once again-
Bill is carrying Dipper bridal style, and Pine Tree is laughing and trying not to fall, “Don’t you dare drop me! I will kill you if you do!”
Bill simply promises not to before he carries him into Dipper’s bedroom, trying to toss him onto the bed, which has Dipper shrieking but also pulling him into bed with him, “C’mere Billy, don’t leave me alone in bed!”
The banner the whole time read #Gayobliviousness #Gaythoughtsareintheair #Theyareperfectandnoonecantellmeotherwise .
Well, at least he knew that he had Mabel’s blessing.
Moving onto PazNorthwest(Pacifica) snaps apparently they had gone down to the market, and Bill had been holding Dipper’s hand-
“I don’t wanna lose you Dipdop!”
“Fuck you Bill, you just wanna be an ass and not let me buy the croutons!”
“Eat some Doritos instead.”
“Bill, no, I don’t want Doritos! Croutons are toasted bread, and it’s healthier for you! So instead of Doritos you should eat Croutons.”
The next was Dipper drinking a Pit-Cola and walking with Bill (still holding his hand). Bill tried to slip a hand around Dipper’s waist which got Dipper to dump the rest of his soda onto Bill’s shorts, mainly aiming for the crotch area. Bill immediately cursed, letting go and trying to get away-
“Damn it Pine Tree, THESE WERE EXPENSIVE!”
Dipper seems to not give a shit, “I’ll clean them for you, just stop screaming or the RAs are gonna come over.”
So that explains his outfit change. He sees swarms of images of them together during that late-night run, taken by passer-bys and with various tags like:
#WellWellWellDipper #FinallyCipherHasSettledDown #Can’tHelpButNotShip
He finds a picture on Tweeter where he, with his still soiled shorts, managing to hug Dipper close and they both are smiling like a bunch of dorks. The tags read:
#CheckItOut #BillHasAHeart #Relationshipissues
Bill sits in a comfortable silence after that, being tired of checking his phone and instead opting to exist in the moment. Dipper is still clinging to him, warm and his bed actually smelling strangely sweet as Bill takes a few slow breaths. He likes it to be honest, not at all his style but it’s cozy and definitely representative of Dipper.
If he was being honest, he really wanted that moment to never end, so that he wouldn’t have to wake up to the reality of Dipper not actually liking him back. They would just stay there, with Dipper holding onto him like he was the best thing in the world, blissfully still and actually content with having Bill close.
Bill decides to take a picture of Dipper in his sleep, typing out a #IhatethatIloveyou before scrapping the entire post and returning to stillness.
Dipper finally wakes, and releases Bill from his hold, yawning cutely and rubbing his eyes, “Mmmnnn what time is it?”
“It’s uhmm, 10:40am.” Bill supplies quietly.
Bill tries not to squeal when he sees how disheveled the boy looks, and notices that he’s also got on shorts but no shirt, trying to commit as much of his slender physique to his memory as possible. He snorts when he sees a drool stain dried on Dipper’s cheek and Dipper is still giving zero shits-
“Feel free to use the shower and steal some of my clothes. I’mma make eggs and bacon so if you want some then you can have.” he groggily replies, pushing against Bill and quietly urging him to get out of his bed.
Bill gets the message and freshens up, quickly getting ready and taking some of Dipper’s clothes for the road. He also thanks Mabel for the new toothbrush she provides, and washes away the alcohol and chip-filled breath from the night before.
The smell of eggs, bacon and something else fills the air and he can’t help but rush to the kitchen to see what Dipper is whipping up-
Dipper seemed to be getting a bit more creative, as he also whips up some bacon-pancakes for them, and Paz loops around him to get plates, cups and the like. The girls and Bill enjoy Dipper’s lovely breakfast while Dipper leaves to shower and Bill tries to get him to stay and eat-
“Dipper usually has a bad stomach the day after he drinks, so he can’t eat till like a couple hours from now. Like every time he tries he always throws up, so it’s better for him to just take a long shower and hold off on food.”
Bill nods and chats with the girls, checking their social media and trying to piece together the craziness of the night before. (The girls gush over how cute Bill and Dipper are in most of their photos and videos, and Bill can’t help but feel a pang of uneasiness enter his chest.)
Ultimately, Bill bids them all a farewell and heads home, and sprawls out on the couch. His best friend Pyronica finds him first, already well aware of how most of his night went and comforts the loser in his unrequited love.
Once his shower is finished and he barely manages to get his pants on Dipper hears a little chirp from his phone and he checks Tweeter-
Bill’s on the floor, clutching his stomach with the caption:
#FoodPoisoingCauseDipperCooked
Dipper decides to respond with a photo of his own, flipping off the camera with a smile;
#FuckYouCipher #YouLovedIt #SeeifIMakeAnythingForYouNextTime #UngratefulAss
That smile falls when he sees how many mistakes he made last night.