Chapter Text
January 2016. 14 years later.
Emma Swan sighed, the back of her head hitting the hallway wall behind her as her fingers carded quickly through her long locks. Her body sagged against the wall and she closed her eyes for just a moment, just a single moment to savor the peace that had finally settled over her apartment.
She shook her head back and forth, the ends of her hair shifting over her shoulders. Her hand rose, fingers pinching the bridge of her nose. She’d always known that raising her son on her own was going to be hard. She’d known it from the moment she’d woken up in the middle of the night to find Neal gone, a letter on the pillow where his head should’ve been. She’d been seven months pregnant, seven months pregnant and half-way through her the last year of her criminal justice degree at University of Boston.
She should’ve known it was going to happen, should’ve known he was going to leave. If there was one thing she was sure of, it was that nothing ever worked out for Emma Swan. Especially love. She hadn’t been in love since…. Well since him, since that town, since that family. She should’ve known Neal, of all people, would not have been the one to be different.
Lifting herself from the wall, she made her way down the hallway toward the living room. Her eyes widened at the mess Henry had left for her. She loved her three-year-old dearly, would do anything in the world for him, but she really couldn’t wait until he was able to clean up after himself. Groaning she fell to her knees and began pulling toys to her so she could put them in his toy box. There were more of them than usual, likely due to the fact that he’d been grumpy and fussy all day and she’d tried every toy they had in the house to calm him, not that it had actually worked. No, it had been one of those days. The kind of day where if you picked him up, he wanted down; if you put him down, he wanted up; if you had the car, he wanted the giraffe; and if you had the giraffe, he wanted the car. Nothing had made him happy, well nothing until she’d put Mickey Mouse Clubhouse on and he’d fallen asleep on the couch.
Of course it would have been Mickey that finally calmed him. Damn mouse always did the trick.
The turning of the door handle caused her to pause, her hand mid-air holding yet another Hot Wheel, and turn her head to the door of her apartment. Other than herself, there were only three other people with a key: Ruby, David, or Mary Margaret. She’d met David and Mary Margaret, or Snow as she was nicknamed because she looked so much like the Disney princess, when her and Neal had moved into the building five years ago. It hadn’t taken long for the couple to worm their way into her life and when they had found out that Neal had left, they had taken it upon themselves to make sure she was taken care of. Ruby was a similar story. She worked with Snow at Enchanted Marketing, the two woman having known each other for years, and when she’d met Emma they’d hit it off immediately.
Speaking of Ruby, her lips curled into a smile at the telltale dark hair of her friend as she stepped into the apartment. Not that she was surprised, it was a very rare that she went a single night without one of her friends coming over to see her.
They were a family, the five of them. A family very reminiscent of the one she’d had when she was fourteen, of the one she’d lost.
“Emma Swan!” Ruby shrieked, her eyes wide, as she shut the door and focused her attention on Emma. “What the hell do you think you are doing?”
Her eyebrows furrowed, the features on her face shifting in surprise at Ruby’s outburst. Rolling her eyes, she picked up yet another one of Henry’s toys. “Seriously? What the hell does it look like I am doing? I’m picking up after the three-year-old monster that replaced my son today.”
“I can see that, Em. What I mean is... Why are you not getting ready for your date?”
Her hand stopped in midair. “Date? What are you…” Her words trailed off as her eyes widened in realization. Her head fell to the right ever so slightly as she bit her lip. Shit. She’d forgotten. After the craziness that was her day, she’d totally forgotten that she’d finally given into Ruby and Snow’s requests and allowed them to set her up on a blind date with the new guy at Enchanted Marketing.
Normally, she wasn’t one to date, especially after the Neal fiasco. In fact, since Neal had left her, she’d only been on one date. It had been with the guy named Walsh and he’d spent the entire time talking about monkeys. Needless to say, there had not been a second date and after, she’d decided to focus her energy on work and Henry.
It was just…. Snow and Ruby had been bugging her for weeks about this guy. This guy who they refused to tell her the name of. What fun is that, Emma? It’s a blind date! If we tell you then you will look up his name on the agency’s website and see his picture. This guy who Ruby assured her was unbelievably hot and totally perfect for her. Seriously Em, if I wasn’t with Mulan and into girls, I would totally be hitting that . This guy who Snow said was a complete gentlemen. He made me wait inside while he made four trips back and forth to my car to get the new Snapple campaign! In. The. Rain. Emma, David doesn’t even do that for me.
So, even though she hadn’t been looking to start anything serious, she’d actually been really looking forward to the date.
And, now she’d forgotten. Story of her life.
Standing quickly, she met her friend’s gaze. “Crap, Ruby. I totally...”
“We don’t have time for that, Swan.” Ruby rushed forward, her fingers closing around her wrist as she turned and tugged Emma toward her bedroom. “He’s going to meet you at the restaurant at nine and it is only eight. If we hurry, I may have just enough time to transform you from ‘the mommy next door’ into the beautiful goddess we both know you are.”
A smile tugged at her lips as she allowed Ruby to drag her past Henry’s room and down the rest of the hallway. Reaching her bedroom, Ruby sat her on the bed before she turned and began to shift through her closet, pulling out random dresses for her to try on.
Perhaps her night wasn’t ruined after all.
Emma burrowed her nose further into her red scarf as the wind whipped wildly around her. Her leather gloved hands curled into fists as she wound her arms tighter around her middle, in an attempt to create more heat than her black peacoat was providing, and walked quickly toward the restaurant. Currently, she was only five minutes late. She would have been on time, but there had been no parking close to the restaurant and she’d had to park two blocks away. Which would have been fine had it not been below freezing and snowing, but it was and now she was cold.
It didn’t help that Ruby had insisted she wear a dress. A little black number that stopped about mid-thigh, paired with black tights, a red scarf, and some red stilettos. She looked hot, there was no denying that. It just hadn’t been her first choice of outfit given the weather in Boston. She would have much preferred a nice pair of black pants and boots.
She shook her head. It didn’t matter what she wanted, she knew better than to argue with Ruby when it came to fashion. Her friend won every time and this would have been no different. Her eyes lifted from the pavement, where she was trying to make sure she didn’t fall, to take in the sight of the restaurant in front of her and she let out a sigh.
Almost there. Just another minute or so and she would be safely tucked in the warmth that the building had to offer. Her gaze fell on the single person waiting in front of the entrance and she bit her lip. She couldn’t see his face as he was staring out in the direction of the street, but she could see that his hair was dark, a disheveled mess that the wind had sticking up on all different directions. His hair led to a chiseled jaw line, one that was covered in that three day old scruff that had always been her weakness. The collar of his black motorcycle jacket was popped, likely to guard him against the cold, and he was holding a single red rose in his gloved hands.
Her heart quickened as the corners of her lips curled into a smile. She had no doubt in her mind that this was her date and holy fuck, Ruby had been right. He was insanely hot. She sped up, intending to get to him faster, and quickly did a mental check on her appearance. Her hair would need a little tending to, but other than that she looked just as great as when she’d left Ruby at the apartment.
Reaching him, she twisted her hands in front of her. “You wouldn’t by chance be waiting on a blind date set up through Ruby Lucas would you?”
He turned his body toward her, a smile playing on his lips as a hand reached up to comb through his hair. She was struck by how oddly familiar the action was, how oddly familiar the way his arm rose and brushed his hair back to the right before tucking a bit of it behind his ear was, but before she had time to consider the reason she was distracted by the way his eyes, his cobalt eyes, widened in surprise.
“ Emma ?” Her name of his lips was full of surprise and she found herself tilting her head in confusion.
How did he know her name? Hadn’t Ruby…
He stepped forward and she was shocked when she didn’t feel the urge to step back away from him, like she normally would when someone was invading her space, but instead felt abnormally at ease. It was a weird feeling, being completely comfortable around someone she’d just met. Although, it wasn’t something she’d never felt before.
Nodding her head, she tucked a lock of hair behind her ear and smiled. “Yep, That’s me. Emma. Emma Swan, actually.”
The grin that took over his face was large, his eyes crinkling at the corners from the size of it, and he shook his head. “Bloody hell, Emma Swan. I truly cannot…”
His voice was cut off by her phone ringing in her pocket. Frowning, she held up a finger and pulled the phone out to see Ruby’s name on the screen.
Her eyes darted to her date and she gave him a small smile. “Just a minute, it’s Ruby. She’s watching my son.”
Turning quickly so she could face away from him, she placed the phone to her ear. “Ruby? What’s up?”
“Emma?” Ruby questioned over the line before continuing. “I am so so sorry to call. I mean I know you are on a date, but….”
She rolled her eyes and interrupted. “Ruby it is not a big deal. Just tell me why you called.”
She heard her sigh over the line. “Henry woke up and, well, I am pretty sure he’s running a fever. Like a really high one. It is not that I can’t handle it, but he’s really grumpy and nothing I do is calming him. I didn’t…”
Panic seized her chest. She needed to get home. Now. The last time Henry ran a fever it got so high he had to spend three nights in the hospital. She couldn’t risk a repeat. Turning to her date, she placed her hand over the speaker.
“I’m sorry. It’s my kid, he’s sick. I have to go.” The words rushed out of her lips quickly.
He ran his hand through his hair. “Emma, just give me a moment. Please. ”
She shook her head. “I’m sorry I have to go.”
Without waiting on his response, she turned and put the phone back up to her ear. “Ruby, I am on my way.”
Hanging up, she rushed down the sidewalk as quickly as her shoes would allow. She heard her date call out for her once more, but she ignored him. She was a mother and her kid was more important, he had to understand that or it wouldn’t have worked anyway. He had to understand that she didn’t have the luxury of relying on someone else to take care of her kid.
It was all on her, it has always all been on her. Ruby, Snow, and David helped when they could, but at the end of the day… She was in this alone.
She’d been in this alone since she’d left Storybrooke, and Killian Jones, behind.
Shifting on the chair so her feet were more securely beneath her, Emma glanced across the table to smile at Henry eating his pancakes in his chair. His fever had finally broke early this morning, around three in the morning to be exact. She’d never been so relieved to see her baby boy finally, finally, snuggle into his blankets and fall into a peaceful sleep. Although, his late night hadn’t resulted in a lie-in this morning. Nope, he’d been up right at the crack of dawn as if he hadn’t spent the entirety of yesterday grumpy and sick.
Shaking her head, she stifled a laugh as Henry attempted, and failed, to spear a pancake with his fork. She still didn’t know why he’d run a fever, so her plan was to keep an eye on him over the weekend to make sure he truly was on the mend. Until then, she wanted nothing more than to curl on the couch and watch some Mickey Mouse with him.
Her only regret was that she’d had to cancel her date at the last minute. Ruby hadn’t been lying when she said he was hot. Not to mention his eyes, eyes that reminded her of something. Something she couldn’t quite place, but it was something that made her feel… at home. She bit her lip, her head inclining. How odd was it that his eyes made her feel safe? It wasn’t like she’d met this person before, but, now that she thought about it, his entire presence made her feel at ease. And the way he said her name, a name Ruby had obviously given even though she’d claimed not to have, was full of shock and awe. It was almost as though they knew each other. But they didn’t. They couldn’t have.
The one thing she did know, however, was that he was cute. She had only had a moment to take a look, but he was definitely one of the more good looking men she’d ever seen. Which was more evidence for why it sucked that she’d had to bail. Maybe she’d call Ruby or Snow later and see if she could get his name and number to reschedule.
That is, after she spent the morning hanging out with her favorite toddler. Speaking of which… Henry shot her a toothy grin from across the table, syrup dripping down his chin as he shoved more pancakes in his mouth. She shook her head, another smile forming on her face. Sometimes she still marveled that she’d created this perfect kid. For a lost little girl, she’d at least accomplished something in her life.
Standing up, she grabbed her plate from the table and made her way to the kitchen. The faster she cleaned up from breakfast the quicker her and Henry could get on with their lazy day. She’d just turned the kitchen sink on, her hands moving to place her plate underneath, when a knock sounded on her front door.
Tugging her lip into her mouth, her eyebrows furrowed as she wondered who could possibly need her this early. Shutting off the water, she stifled a laugh as she passed Henry, his hair now sticking up every which direction from the syrup, and made her way to the front of the apartment. At the door, she lifted onto her tiptoes to look out of the peep hole and gasped at what she saw.
It was her date. Her date from last night. How…
Her heart raced in her chest, her hands coming up to smooth down what she was sure was bedhead. Her eyes drifted over her pajamas, a simple white t-shirt and red plaid flannel pajamas, just as another knock sounded on the door. She didn’t have time to change, time to make herself look more presentable. He was here and he was waiting.
Taking a deep breath, she opened the door and was once again met with the bluest eyes she’d ever seen. Well, maybe not ever . Glancing at the floor, she shook her head once more. Now was not the time to think about a boy from fourteen years ago, a boy she would likely never see a again, a boy who….
“Emma.” His words were a mere whisper, pulling her from her thoughts, as she lifted her gaze.
Her heart skipped a beat. The way he said her name, it was… Her eyes narrowed as she studied his features closely. His cerulean eyes. His dark, disheveled hair. The way the corners of his eyes crinkled as he smiled. Her head inclined ever so slightly as she took in the man shifting nervously in front of her. His eyes stayed locked on her form as he exhaled loudly, his hand raising to tug at the nape of his neck.
“ Emma. ” He murmured once more, his voice almost sounding desperate.
She tilted her head further to the side. No, he didn’t sound desperate, he sounded… hopeful. The way he said her name… He stepped forward, his features shifting into a look she had seen before, into a look that was familiar.
Her stomach dropped, a gasp escaping her lips. It wasn’t possible. It couldn’t be, but somehow… Somehow, her heart knew.
She took in the man in front of her suddenly able to see the boy he used to be. He was taller, all broad shoulders and toned arms. His face had lost that baby look, the lines of his cheeks defined and his chin chiseled, but his scar was still there. The one he’d gotten from his first attempt at shaving when he was ten.
Her hand came up to cover her mouth as tears pricked the corners of her eyes. Her name. She’d heard her name spoken that way a million different times, spoken like it was the most important word to leave his lips, like it was the only word he ever wished to say again.
“Killian.” Her voice broke at the end of his name, a sob erupting from her lips as the tears finally fell from her lids.
She was shocked to find his eyes still full of the love and admiration that had always seen there. The same love and admiration that she used to take comfort in. She stepped forward, her arms rising so her fingertips could brush the leather of his jacket and once she did, once she felt the fabric beneath her fingers, she knew it wasn’t a dream. He was really here, he was really standing in front of her after all these years.
“Emma.” Her name was a broken murmur as he lurched forward and pulled her into him, his arms wrapping around her middle and his nose burying itself in her hair. She tucked her head beneath his chin, he’d always been taller than her but now more so, and closed her eyes.
There were so many questions she wanted to ask him, so many things she wanted to tell him, but for now she was content to simply enjoy the feeling of his arms around her once more, the feeling of finally, finally , feeling like a part of her broken heart was back in place. So, she didn’t move. She stayed like that, wrapped in his arms as they swayed gently back and forth.
A few moments later, she felt him place a light kiss atop her head before he pulled back to look into her eyes. “Bloody hell. I simply cannot believe that this is truly you, Emma. I never once expected for you to…” He paused, looking up to the ceiling and swallowing hard before continuing. “To know that you’ve been living in the same city as I all this time, that you’ve been right here all along, under my very nose, and I’ve never once found you. How is this even possible? How?”
She could see the frustrated tears forming in his eyes and she reached up to cup his cheek, her thumb brushing it gently. He leaned forward, his nose falling into the crook of her neck, and she threaded her fingers through the hair on the back of his head.
She knew exactly what he was feeling because a part of her felt it too. How had she not realized who he was last night? How could she have possibly missed it? She leaned her head against his as more tears fell onto her cheeks. Why hadn’t Ruby just told her his name?
“Momma, I done!” Henry broke in, pulling her from her thoughts. “Momma, want down.”
Pulling away, she wiped her eyes quickly before meeting his gaze. Like her, he had tear tracks on his cheeks. She gave him a small smile, one he returned quickly, and reached up to wipe a stray tear from his eyes.
“That’s Henry.” She whispered, unsure if Ruby and Snow had mentioned her son in great detail. “He’s my son.”
He nodded, shifting closer to her still. “Aye. The reason you needed to leave in such a haste last night. Ruby and Snow have mentioned him several times. He’s feeling better, I gather?”
She rolled her eyes. “Better is putting it lightly. He was up at the crack of dawn ready to go.”
A laugh escaped his lips as his head tilted backward slightly. “Aye. Most children are like that.”
“Really?” She questioned with an arched brow. “And how would you know that?”
He shrugged his shoulders. “Liam and Belle. Seems having two nephews and a niece makes one a bit knowledgeable about children.”
Her heart swelled at the mention of his family, a family that had once been her lifeline, a family that had once been her family. It was nice to know that things had turned out well for the other Jones siblings.
“Momma!” Henry cried once more from inside the apartment causing Killian to laugh again.
“Seems the lad is requiring some assistance, love.” He broke in, tucking a lock of hair behind her ear. “May I? I’d love to get to know the lad if it is okay with you.” He tilted his head in the direction of Henry’s voice.
She didn’t even try to hide the surprise in her eyes, her hand reaching out to touch his arm. “Really? Are you sure you want to? I mean, I know you likely...”
“Love.” He interrupted, a smile tugging at his lips. “Our mutual friends, Ms. Lucas and Mrs. Nolan, made it abundantly clear that you and the lad are a package deal. I realize we have much to discuss, much to catch up on. For now, please know that the lad is a part of you and there is no possible way I could not lov-” He paused, clearing his throat as his arm rose to yank on the hair at his nape nervously. “Well, that is….”
She cupped his cheek, her eyes softening as she gently stroked it with her thumb. What he said, it should’ve made her want to run. It should’ve made her want to get as far away from him as possible, to get away from this guy who literally just walked back into her life after fourteen years, but it didn’t.
Killian Jones wasn’t just any guy to her. Things had always been easier for them, more natural. They had history. A history that had included first love and family and despite how often she’d tried, she had never forgotten Killian. She had never forgotten how he made her feel and she had never, not once, stopped loving him.
Not for a single second.
And, given what he’d almost just said, it seemed he may still feel the same. He was right, they had a lot they needed to talk about, but for now his almost slip up was enough for her to know they would be okay, that they would make it work this time.
Smiling, she nodded her head. “I know, Killian. I know. ”
He laughed, his forehead moving to rest on hers. “Emma…”
“Momma! Down!” Henry broke in once more, causing them both to giggle.
Pulling back, she jerked her head toward the interior of her home. “What do you say, Jones. Ready to meet the most important person in my life?”
He nodded, his eyes bright with disbelief and laced their fingers together. “Aye, love. I’d like nothing more.”
Turning, she yanked on their joined hands to pull him inside the apartment, the door shutting quietly behind him. Hours later, after a long talk while Henry napped, she sat on the couch with a cup of hot chocolate in her hands watching Killian on the floor playing with her son. His head lifted, his gaze catching hers and she couldn’t help the way her lips formed a smile. Her heart was filled with happiness at the sight of him in her home, as the sight of him of next to Henry.
She’d known all those years ago that what they shared was something special, something rare. She remembered thinking that the town was what was different, but she was wrong. It wasn’t the town at all.
It was Killian, it had always been Killian.
Catching his gaze once more, she sipped on her drink in an attempt to hide her smile. Shaking his head, he crawled away from Henry toward her with a mischievous glint in his eyes. Placing his hands on her blanket covered legs, he hauled himself up onto the couch and wrapped an arm around her shoulders to pull her gently, without spilling her drink, into his chest. As soon as she was settled, he placed a light kiss on the crown of her head before resting his cheek there.
“Emma?” He whispered into her locks.
She grinned, tilting her head to meet his gaze. “Hmm?”
“I’m afraid I must ask you a question, lass.” He twirled her hair between to fingers.
“Really, what is it?”
He dropped her hair, his face becoming very serious. “I was devastated when they took you.” His head shook as his eyes fell to the couch. “I thought I would never see you again and that, that broke me.” He’d all but whispered the last words which caused her to reach out to link their fingers.
“I know. It was the same for me. I wanted nothing more than to stay, but Regina made me leave and she took me so far away from you there was no way to get back.” She squeezed his hand in hers and his eyes lifted once more.
He gave her a small smile. His voice was solemn as he continued, full of the sadness he’d felt, and still felt, from their separation. “I convinced myself that I would never see you again in an attempt to move on with my life, but it never worked. I never forgot you.” His eyes hardened now, his tone full of conviction for his words. “I never stopped thinking of you, and I never stopped loving you.”
She gasped out loud when she heard him say he loved her. After all this time it seemed improbable and, yet, she could feel it within herself as well. She could feel it deep within her very being that she’d never truly let Killian Jones go and she never would. He’d been her first love, the boy she’d compared all others to, and her heart still knew that he was the one, just like it had known when she was fourteen years old.
“Killian.” She started, only to have him place a single finger on her lips with a shake of his head.
“Let me finish, love.” He brushed her hair back, his hand coming to rest right over her heart. “When we were young, we had something amazing, something pure and true, and I’d like nothing more that to try to have that with you once again. I’d like nothing more than to be apart of your and Henry’s lives, that is if you still want me.”
As his words sank in, she did not even give herself a second to rethink how she felt. Not one single moment. Nodding quickly, she surged upward, her lips meeting his in a gently kiss. His arms circled her body, his hands tangling themselves in her hair. Mindful of her cup, she reached her free hand up to cup his cheek as she opened her lips slightly and sighed.
He pulled away first, a goofy grin on his face while a single eyebrow wagged in her direction. “Bloody hell, Swan. Your lad is in the room. Let’s keep the kissing to a minimum in front of the boy, aye?”
She rolled her eyes, her head swaying gently. “You’re an idiot, Killian Jones.”
He bumped her shoulder lightly. “Aye, that I am.”
Laying her head back on his chest, her hands wrapped around her cup once more. “But you are my idiot. You always have been. And, for the record, I’d love for you to be a part of our lives. More than anything.”
He didn’t say anything else, just nodded his head as he pulled her tighter against him and for the first time in fourteen years that familiar feeling settled into her chest.
The lost girl had found her home once more.
And this time, she wasn’t going to let anyone take it from her.
The End.