Chapter Text
THE CAR STOPPED right in front of a red house, now known as your new home, at least for a few months. The houses around followed a pattern: two stories, five windows, a garage, and mailboxes perfectly lined up. The only thing that differentiated them were the colors and the identifier numbers next to the front door.
"Come on, your dad is already inside." The woman was the first to get out of the car, while you stayed motionless in the back seat, mumbling all the things she had said.
"He got here first to check the house and deal with the paperwork, you know." She shrugged as she tapped her fingers against the glass door, immediately grabbing your attention.
"Alright, I’m coming out!" Your heart raced, pumping enough blood to expose some veins on your neck and forehead.
The mother opened the trunk, and a collection of small, well-packaged boxes with "fragile" labels were meticulously organized inside. It was a miracle they were in perfect condition, considering the road to South Park is quite bumpy.
"They’re here, finally!" The front door opened as the owner of the voice stood in the doorway, arms crossed over their chest, restless legs making you roll your eyes at him.
"You don’t know the hell it is to drive through these roads."
And they started arguing. They actually seemed like a real couple, if you looked at it from a different angle.The impatience from both about the new job was starting to irritate you. Two grown professionals weren’t taking this mission seriously, leaving all the pressure of a possible failure on your shoulders. You, being a teenager, were the only one who could do anything about what was asked. That’s why your "parents" didn’t seem interested, their only job was to keep up the family facade. The rest was on you. After some back and forth, the boxes from the car had already taken over the living room, which contained only a hard sofa, an old tube TV right in front, and a few potted plants in strategic places. Everything in that place was rotten and repulsive, the houses, the interior… Seriously, when you crossed the room to head toward the stairs, you found mold stains near the wall. The previous owner hated this place, no doubt about it.
"Your room is the first one near the stairs, sweetie." The mother returned from the kitchen with a wine glass in hand. This must have been her first glass, but her heavy eyes and half-open mouth revealed a certain fragility to the alcohol. "Put your things away and go for a walk, meet the new neighbors, how about that?"
"Your mom’s right." The father, sitting on the couch while typing something on his phone, agreed without even looking at the two of you. "Go out and make some friends, don’t come back until you’ve made one."
You rolled your eyes at both of them, but still went up the stairs with two boxes. When you crossed the door to find the interior of your room, you were faced with a vast space. The size of it left you mesmerized; your mind imagined all sorts of decorations you could do there throughout the year, but quickly reprimanded itself. There wouldn’t be time. You had a set day and hour to leave the city. Wanting to get attached to it was just stupid.
You dropped the boxes on the floor and opened a few, finding only clothes and some extra accessories like a Tamagotchi, which had died at least three times that day, a pack of hairpins with embossed decorations, a strawberry-shaped lipstick, and a pink heart-shaped mirror. Those were your treasures.
You looked at yourself in the mirror, noticing signs of exhaustion on your face like red eyes and deep dark circles. The last thing you wanted at that moment was to go out and meet new people, but you had to. It was the first item on the "to-do" list your parents would have to sign off on and hand to the boss.
You left your room and went down the stairs intending to leave without talking to anyone. Outside, you shivered from the cold wind that hit you directly. From what little you knew about the city, it was common to have a lot of snow, at least most of the year.
There was no one on the streets since it was Sunday and school would start tomorrow. At the house next door, an unusual noise seemed to be coming from the garage. With no expectations of anything, you slowly walked toward the sound, finding the door open and some boys sitting around playing some RPG game on a round table.
"Do we need to wear these clothes to play?" one of the boys asked, scratching his head. "This headband hasn’t fit me in like six years…" His fingers touched the supposedly too-tight headband.
"Paladin Butters, you’re a queer." Another one replied, frowning. He wasn’t much different, his supposed wizard hat was straining to stay on his head. "Put that crap on right, come on!"
"Dude, get over it, we’re not ten anymore," said a redhead, holding some kind of crown of thorns in one hand. "And this game isn’t fun anymore, everyone already knows the Staff of Truth is going to end up at the bottom of Stark Lake." He pointed his finger at the fat guy.
"Turning our old game into an RPG was a vaginal idea… Huh, hey! What are you spying on, bitch?" The same boy pointed in your direction. "You think you can steal our Staff of Truth? Bring it on!" He grabbed two dice from the table as if inviting you to battle.
"Eric, this is our new neighbor." A brown-haired woman, seemingly kind but elegant, appeared behind you. "Be nice to her."
"Screw you, mom!" He stormed off, not saying anything. "Listen, do you think you can just show up here at Castle Kupa Keep without facing consequences?"
"Cartman…" The redhead murmured, perhaps realizing how ridiculous the situation was getting.
"Are you a disguised black elf?!" Eric Cartman continued, almost climbing onto the table to continue his little act. "You’re not touching the staff!"
"Cartman! You’re so stupid and dumb." He frowned. "Hey, new kid! We’re not playing this crap anymore…" The same boy waved.
You walked into the garage and slowly approached the boys. There were five of them in total, one of them was wearing a blonde wig and a pink dress over his orange jacket, the supposed Elf King, wearing a tight red cloak with golden details, and as previously mentioned, holding a crown of twigs in one hand. Butters, the paladin, was taking the red jewel headband off his forehead, mumbling in relief, and next to him was another boy who kept his arms crossed the whole time.
"Cool hideout for playing RPG," you said, making a satisfied face while scanning Eric’s garage.
"The Kupa Keep Castle was unfortunately destroyed over time, lost among the debris of what used to be…" Eric lamented in a dramatic tone about his old cardboard hut in his backyard.
"You had to destroy it, Eric," Butters commented. "Your mom said it was getting all moldy and smelly."
"Shut the fuck up, Butters, go home!" Eric calmly shooed him away.
"I really need to go, it’s getting late." Butters left the table and walked out of the garage. "See you tomorrow, guys. Bye, new kid."
"Bye…" you replied. "Well… I didn’t want to bother you, it’s just that my dad asked me to come meet the new neighbors."
"Alright, alright. I’m Eric, this is Kyle, the one who left is Butters, he’s…" Eric stopped to analyze the boy with the blonde wig. "That’s Kenny, don’t ask me why he wanted to dress as a princess, and this idiot here is Stan. Hey, Stan, wake up, damn it." He kicked the chair.
"Huh… What is it?!" Stan slowly opened his eyes, adjusting to the light of Eric’s garage.
"Dude, you look awful," Eric expressed concern for his friend. "It’s not every day your girlfriend dumps you because she’s a lesbian… What’s your take on that, new kid?"
"I think… It’s way too complicated," you shrugged, analyzing Stan up and down. He really did look terrible. He was one of the only ones not wearing a costume like his friends; he just had a blue helmet with a feather on his lap.
"Haha, great way to say 'Fuck off, asshole.' " Cartman laughed.
"I think I’ll go home too, can’t stay out too late…" The boy stood up from the chair, walking past you with his head down and hands in his pants pockets.
''Drunk as hell, damn…’" Cartman grumbled.