Chapter Text
“Heya, Dipper!” Mabel wakes me up with enthusiasm, shaking me from my sleep.
“Oh, morning Mabel.” I say, yawning. “Ready to save the universe?”
“Save the universe?” Mabel looks confused.
“Uh, yeah.” I sit up. “Remember the journal entries? Our uncle’s plans to open a portal to another dimension and release a bunch of nightmare beasts?”
“Oh. About that…” Mabel says. “I met Ford’s muse last night.”
“You did?”
“Yeah. His name is Bill Cipher, and he can visit people in their dreams.” Mabel explains. “He gives people guidance and is trying to free our dimension from the oppressive constraints of government.”
“No way.” I say. “You’re trying to overthrow the government?”
“Not necessarily. I never said I was on board with Bill’s plans. I don’t want to act hastily.”
“Mabel, acting hastily is what you’re all about. You’re so impulsive!” I point out.
“Not with this.” Mabel says. “I think Bill’s proposal is a good idea. But I want to ask for your input. I can’t make a decision like this without my brother’s approval.”
“Just… give me a moment to think about this.” I say, trying to wrap my head around the absurdity of this proposal. Mabel wants to overthrow the government and “free” our dimension. So does Ford. But this just seems like this will cause unnecessary suffering. I still remember the thing about what will happen to “normal” people.
“You can’t honestly think this is a good thing for society.” I say. “Bill Cipher plans to murder all people who don’t like his rule or are too ‘normal’ for him. I know you want to live out your fantasy of being liked by everyone. But that’s all it is- a fantasy!”
“You don’t understand!” Mabel says. “Do you know what it’s like to be forced to hide who you really are? Do you know what it’s like to be shunned for being different? In this new world, we’ll have none of that. We’ll be accepted.”
“Mabel, we'll get through it.” I say. “We have each other. We just have to stick together.”
“You say that.” Mabel says. “But you won't even stick with me on this! You're not willing to take my side!”
“ I'm not willing to take your side? You're the one who wants to betray me to follow some messed up power fantasy!” I shove Mabel away from me, causing her to bump into her bed.
Mabel turns her head away from me. “I can't believe you right now.”
“Wait, Mabel, I’m so-”
Our argument is interrupted by Uncle Ford’s voice: “Kids, it's time for breakfast.” There's a click as he unlocks the door.
—
Breakfast is silent and uncomfortable. I don't know what happened between the girls, but clearly something. They keep sending each other looks. Mabel glaring at Dipper, and Dipper returning her stare with a look of remorse.
I want to break the tension, but I've never been good at small talk, or anything social, really. Dipper is the first one to speak.
“So, uh, Uncle Ford, I like your outfit.” She says awkwardly. “It's… different from what you were wearing yesterday.”
“Thanks.” I reply, looking down at my cyan shirt covered up by a brown sweater vest. “It was a recommendation from Bi-” I cut myself off, realizing I can’t talk about it with the kids.
“Uh, yeah.” Dipper says. “It must be good for winter, and the trenchcoat is probably nice too, with all this snow.”
“It is.”
“Wait, wait.” Mabel says. “You said it was recommended. And then cut yourself off.”
“Uh, I got the recommendation from… my dead friend? I didn't want to bring his name up again.” I'm a terrible liar, but there’s a nonzero chance Mabel will believe it.
“You're a terrible liar.” Mabel says. “I met your muse, Bill. And you are so-”
“You met Bill?” I exclaim.
“Uh, yeah. Don't try to hide it, Ford. I know what you've been doing with him. I know what's going on between you two.”
“Um… is this about the end of the world?” Dipper asks. “Because we all know about that.”
“No, no.” Mabel says. “I think… that you are in love with Bill!”
“What?” I exclaim. I don't know what I expected her to say, but certainly not that.
“I mean, it's obvious. You call him your muse, he calls you his beloved. You’re gay for Bill Cipher! You guys should totally kiss. Wait, can you kiss a being with no mouth? If you can kiss him, kiss him!”
“I am so incredibly confused right now.” Dipper says, and I could not agree more with her sentiment.
“Mabel, Bill Cipher is a god. A being of pure energy. He doesn't experience romantic love. To suggest that would be absurd! Our relationship is more akin to that of a disciple and a god.”
“Sure thing, Uncle Ford. Don't worry, I support!” Mabel says.
“I am not gay!” I say. “I once made a kissing robot to get better at kissing girls.”
“That is genius.” Dipper says. “A kissing robot. But that's not important. We need to talk about Bill Cipher.”
“Yeah, talk about how he should totally date Uncle Ford.”
“Mabel, stop being so pushy.” Dipper says. “It doesn't matter if Ford is in love with Bill, because they're going to destroy the world!”
“Destroy is a relative term.” I say.
“Yeah.” Mabel agrees. “I think we're making it better. I just need your approval, Dipilina.”
“Don't call me that.” Dipper says.
“Dipper, please. Just let me have this. We'll be happy in Bill’s new world.”
“Mabel, I'm sorry.” Dipper says. “I shouldn't have been so harsh to you. I want to make it up to you. So I'll let you do this.”
—
We're in the portal room now. Ford pulls the lever to turn on the portal.
“Dipper, Dipper, thank you so much!” Mabel exclaims, hugging me.
The symbols on the portal light up. Mabel runs around the room, jumping around in excitement.
“All for family.” I whisper to myself. I don't need to save the world, as long as Mabel is by my side.