Chapter Text
When Archibald Featherignton understood that his wife was pregnant for the third time, he knew it wasn’t his. How could he have been the father ? He just came back from an 18 month trip to the Americas and Portia’s belly was already round.
He said nothing. He needed an heir. So he ordered the trunks to be packed and took his wife and two daughters to the countryside. He would wait and decide what to do once the child was born. He only warned this wife that she better had give him a boy.
The staff at Mayfair was generously paid and dismissed. Portia had hidden her pregnancy. When Portia gave birth to her third child, nobody at Mayfair knew that Portia was expecting.
Penelope came into the world June 15th but no one seemed to care. Not Archibald who scorned his wife for not being able to give him a son. He didn’t even look at the child and turned away from his wife permanently. Since another came into her bed, she could offer herself up to who she wanted, it did not matter to him.
Portia refused to even just carry the child in her arms, symbol of her own shame of having given in to temptation. The child didn’t cry, all the better. She abandoned the child to its fate, hoping the child would die before they went back to London. She was named Penelope after an aunt Portia hated.
Mrs Hill, the cook, took the baby. She herself had just had a child, she gave her her milk and Penelope survived, to be even more forgotten. At this time of the year, the staff was diminished. The cook, the governess, Mrs Varley and her husband Robert lived in the house. Two maids shared the duties of serving the four family members. They did not even know that Portia Featherington had given birth to a child.
After a fortnight, Portia learned that the child was alive. She could not get rid of it, it was not christian to suffocate a child. Nobody thought to tell Portia that no matter what she did from the day of Penelope’s birth, nothing would have opened the gates of heaven for her. She ignored the child the child raised by mrs Danvers, that the people hired during the season saw as her child.
Archibald would have sent his wife away. But then he would have had to take care of his two daughters and, furthermore, his family’s fortune came from his wife and he had access to the money only by the intermediary of his father in law who was still managing his fortune. Since he liked gambling and seeing prostitutes, he could not do without his wife’s fortune. So he kept her her, and her two daughters who were his and the bastard who was somewhere in the house.
When they came back to Mayfair, he asked Portia to conceal the child of sin from him. Penelope was just six months old, Portia gave her syrup, the child fell asleep and traveled in a trunk. No one knew that a six-month-old baby arrived in the Mayfair house.
Catherine Varley was hired as a governess for the Mayfair house. She left her husband at the countryside house. She was generously paid to rid the house of the unwanted child. She took her with her and brought her in a room underneath the roof where she was trapped and hidden from the eyes of London society.
Portia would have left her in the countryside. But more staff would have had to be payed, to keep the house which was closed when they weren’t there. The cook wanted to take her with them but her husband had said no.
So Penelope grew up until she was two in a small room underneath the roof with Rae, Varley’s daughter who was two when Penelope was born.
Varley loved her mistress. She was so easy to live with and take care of. She made her come out in secret when the family was out. Sat in the middle of the living room on the carpet, dressed in the too small clothes of Rae, her soft red curls on her forehead, Penelope was an angel born in hell.
When Penelope was two, the family had to sell the big house because of debts and they moved in another house in Mayfair, across a house with six children. Varley had saw the intrepid girl, Eloise, and had thought that she would have been a good friend to her Penelope. But Penelope didn’t exist. She lived without making any noise.
Penelope was locked up in a room on the third floor. She was not allowed to get close to the windows or leave. Archibald Featherington had decided to sell her once she was sixteen. Some associates of his had garanteed that she would be worth a lot if she stayed a maiden and Archibald thought that at least she would be of some use to him.
Penelope grew up ignoring what fate was waiting for her. She knew that Varley was not her mother and that she had to be very quiet. She wondered if she could look out the window but that was forbidden. Varley had lied. She had told Penelope that she was allergic to the sun and that she had to avoid it or she would be in a lot fo pain.
Rae gifted Penelope a doll. She named her Didi and she was the friend who helped her to not be scared. From time to time, Portia came to see her. She observed her thoroughly to tell her husband how Penelope grew up. « You really are too fat » she told her a day she had forced her to get naked.
The small girl, timid and not much used to conversation stuttered and blushed while she was naked in front of this woman with her cold gaze.
« Are you going to say something ? » Portia shook her and slapped her. Penelope tripped backwards and her doll, Didi fell under the window, in the zone where Penelope was not allowed to go.
« I beg your pardon » offered Penelope without looking at the lady and wringing her hands.
Portia threw her a dress « Get dressed, it belonged to my daughter Prudence, she doesn’t want it anymore ».
Penelope looked at the dress and its bright colours and was touched to receive a gift, even if the dress wasn’t pretty. The dress was too tight for Penelope. So Varley taught her to sow to fix it and Penelope learned sowing. She was eight years old. She also learned that if she put a sheet over herself, the sun did not hurt her. She had tried to get Didi back from under the window without getting close, but she was too far. Penelope was smart, she thought to use a sheet to cover herself to avoid the sun and miracle she felt nothing even if the sun shone through the window.
So, without telling anyone, she dragged a box and climbed on it, hidden by her sheet to look out the window when Mister and Mistress were gone and Varley was occupied. She had seen the other children from across the square. They played outside and Penelope would have liked to go too. But that was forbidden.
Penelope learned through books. Varley taught her how to read and write. She had also taught her mathematics and Penelope wanted to read every book on Earth. She had never gone outside and only knew her room. She knew that there was two girls in the house. But she was not allowed to speak to them. She only talked with Varley and Rae.
And then on day, she saw him. She had learned that children that were not like her were boys. He was watching the girls and had raised his eyes and must have seen Penelope because he stilled. Luckily, she was underneath her sheet. She got down from the box and put the sheet on the bed. Penelope waited for Madam to come up and discipline her for having looked out the window. But nobody came. The boy had said nothing. She named him Gulliver. Varley had given her the book about Gulliver’s stories. So the boy from the square who played with the girls would be Gulliver.
Penelope’s life continued like that, she neither the change of the season, nor Christmas, nor her birthday. She spoke to nearly no one. But she had Varley and Varley held her in her arms each evening when her job allowed it.
When Penelope neared sixteen years of age, she saw Varley arrive, panicked, in her room.
« Is everything alright ? » asked Penelope. « Did i do something wrong ? Is Madam coming to discipline me ? »
« Not this time my dear, no one is coming to discipline you. » Varley caressed the child’s hair. She had learned Penelope’s fate by the Baroness’s mouth. She would be sold by her sixteenth birthday to a brothel to service men.
Varley would have liked to help Penelope flee. But where could she hide her ? Her husband would never accept to her bringing a young girl at their house. Her husband, Robert, Rae, their daughter, and her earned money to feed their family including her parents and her husband’s parents and their disabled son. They weren’t unhappy. But they needed her income.
« My princess, I need to tell you something » began Varley.
Penelope sat on the box that she used as a chair and delicately placed her hands on her knees, her big blue innocent eyes turned towards Varley.
« Do you ever wonder who your parents are Penny ? »
She nodded. « I think Madam is my mother » answered Penelope.
« You’re right » Varley pressed her lips tightly together to not cry.
« She doesn’t like me much, but I don’t know why. » Penelope was wringing her hands.
« You’re perfect my dear. She just does not know the treasure that lives here. » Varley got closer and took Penelope’s hand. « You know my darling, one day someone will love you and you will see life will change for you, I’m sure of it. »
« You love me. »
« Yes I love you like you’re my daughter and for that reason we will get you out of this house. I lied to you Penelope. You’re not allergic to the sun. You could not show yourself at the window and it was the only excuse i could think of.
Penelope was crying « Why mustn’t I go to the window ? »
« Because it would be terrible. If Madam knew, she would hit you even more. I wanted to protect you, do you understand ? »
Penelope nodded.
« I taught you to be a lady my girl and you have the prettiest of manners. You are a lady Penelope, never forget that.
«All right » Penelope was wringing her fingers.
« Would you like to visit the house ? Nobody’s here. They’re at a ball » Varley knew that, in less than three months, Penelope would be brought to a London brothel. Henri Berbrooke managed that brothel discreetly and had business with the baron. Varley hated the man.
She took Penelope through the house, letting her look at each room. She saw her a painting of the Featherington family.
One of the servants made some noise and Varley got out of the room to make sure no one would come and see Penelope. Nobody knew that she lived here.
Penelope looked through the window, marvelling at the life that was unfolding before her eyes. Had she looked up, she might have seen the Viscount looking at her. But Penelope put her hands on the window looking at the horse, the carriages and the trees.
When Varley came back, she yelled at Penelope
« Get away from the window Penny please. »
Penelope was startled and started crying. Varley asked for forgiveness while curtsying and begged Penelope to follow her. The curtains were drawn and Penelope went back to her hiding place.
Varley explained to her that she would take her out during the night first in the garden so that Penelope could get used to the noises and the outside air, then, she would take her to leave the house.
« Madam doesn’t want me anymore ? » asked Penelope while Varley was helping her take off her dress to put on a nightdress. The nightdress was too damaged and was useless. Through the fabric, Varley could see the stripes on Penelope’s back, made by Portia, the nights when Archibald exasperated her so much, blaming her for her infidelity, she would take it out on the child again and again.
Varley thought it was time. Penelope had to leave now and she would do everything to find a solution.
Penelope was laying down on her bed and asked herself if Mister was her father. The two girls in the painting had to be of her family because they had the same hair as hers. Penelope wondered what she had done wrong to deserve this. She turned and looked at the ceiling. Varley had told her that soon, she would take her outside. Penelope had read everything she could about stars. Maybe she would see stars when she would be authorised to leave.
Varley had said that she was going to run away. Penelope was scared. Here, in her room, she was safe. Where was she supposed to go ? She only knew Varley, Rae and Gulliver. But she had never talked to him. Penelope fell asleep dreaming of Gulliver and the girls having grown up and beautiful. It had been long ago since she had stopped hiding under her sheet.
Indeed, Penelope would soon se the stars, she wasn’t aware of it yet that she would be the sun of a man who was living in the fog for nearly ten years, a man that would save her from her tragic fate. A man that Penelope would save with her grace and purity, a man who, for know, was drowning his sorrows in whiskey, unaware that his future lived trapped in the house across the street.