Chapter Text
Everything felt like a blur; he could see and hear and feel what was going on, but he wasn’t really there. Chongyun walked, head slightly down as he stared at the pavement and tried to tune out his father yelling at him to come back, to finish what he started. Tried to focus on Xingqiu pushing him away, ignore the stare of Shenhe and the crown, pretend to acknowledge Xiangling’s questions and shock upon seeing her friend reappear with a bleeding nose-
“-Do you have a tissue?” Chongyun mumbled, processing the fact that he still was bleeding from his nose and didn’t care to try to clean up dried blood from his face later. He blinked a few times, trying to bring himself back to the present as the three walked back to Xinqiu’s car, even if just to debrief and calm down after the whole thing.
“I should have some in the car,” Xingqiu responded, patting his pockets to make sure he didn’t actively have one on his person. Chongyun nodded, placing his index under his nose to at least stop the blood from dripping everywhere.
“What the hell happened-?” Xiangling asked, still trying to figure things out. Xingqiu looked back and shook his head, trying not to discuss anything until they were at least in his car and had some sort of barrier between prying eyes and Chongyun. Xiangling paused for a second before quietly sighing, accepting that Xingqiu wasn’t going to say anything if he didn’t want to and that Chongyun didn’t really seem in the right headspace to elaborate either.
The walk to the car felt like an eternity for everyone, the 5 minutes stretching on endlessly as each one of them tried to process things on their own. Xingqiu let out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding when he looked up and finally saw his car, walking a little faster to get in front of the white-haired boy, opening the door to grab a pack of tissues and handing it over as he got closer, stepping aside so he could get into the passenger seat. The other two got in, the doors slamming before they sat in what felt like a deafening silence for several long moments.
“Chongyun?” Xingqiu asked, voice soft and gentle as he glanced at the other, hand on his shoulder, “Do you wanna chat about… this right now?”
The group sat in silence once more, Chongyun seemingly staring off into space. Xingqiu nodded, accepting that as enough of an answer, as he buckled, about to start the car, when Chongyun spoke up, “Why him…” Chongyun mumbled, swallowing hard as he tried to sort through his thoughts. “Why the fuck is he here-” the other two slightly jumped when Chongyun hit the dashboard, not exactly sure how else to deal with everything swirling inside him right now. “Why, of all the days, does he end up showing up the first time I finally start to feel free, the second I stop jumping at every little sound-” Tears well up in his eyes as he presses the tissue back to his nose, trying to fight them off.
Xingqiu carefully places his hand over his partner’s, giving it a gentle squeeze, a silent reminder he’s there, a source of comfort. “You wanna get ice cream? It’ll give you a second to process everything better, plus you typically seem to do better with a change of scenery.”
He rests his head against the seat and takes a deep breath, checking the tissue to see if the bleeding is getting any better. “Sure.” Xinqiu nods, starting the engine and pulling out of his spot, driving to the ice cream shop on the other side of town. Chongyun probably wouldn’t mind a little extra time to collect himself after that shit show.
“Inside or drive through?” The navy blue asked, pulling into the parking lot. Chongyun shrugged, checking the tissue again before tapping a finger under his nose.
“I vote we go inside, it seems empty, and also I don’t wanna sit in the back seat for another 20 minutes-” Xiangling chimed, face giving away the fact that she was still clearly concerned, even if her tone seemed like her usual self. The two boys nodded, unbuckling as they all got out and walked in.
The three take their seats, ice cream of choice in hand as they quietly eat it, waiting for someone else to break the silence first. Chongyun sighs, leaning against Xingqiu slightly. “Do you think someone at school is gonna bring this up? I mean- there had to be at least one or two faculty members, I don’t know what they’d do since I’m 18, but-”
“In a town like this, people are bound to talk. With a crowd that size, you are definitely going to have people pestering you about it. All you can do is try your best to ignore them. Any jerk who asks you anything straight up is just gonna be fueled by continued reactions to them,” Xingqiu said matter-of-factly. “Happened in a few smaller circles when people started figuring out I had an eating disorder, I was fortunate that I had enough influence to stomp it out quickly.”
“Plus, you always have us if it gets super bad,” Xiangling said, face soft as she placed a gentle hand over Chongyun’s.
The snow-haired boy smiled softly before it dropped again, eyes going back to his ice cream, “I just… My mom, Shenhe, him… I don’t know what to think, what I should be more worried about- I want to know what the hell happened before we got there, why wasn’t my mom responding.” Chongyun took a deep breath once more, feeling himself start to shake a little as his anxiety tried to take back over, trying to kick him back into that fight or flight mode as the memories of the ordeal played like a movie in front of him.
“She’s going to be okay, I promise,” Xingqiu reassured, rubbing the other’s back soothingly. “We will text or hunt down your aunt somehow and make sure of it. As for what happened, I’m sure we can find that out when we end up talking to one of them.”
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Chongyun stared up at his ceiling, trying to make some kind of guess what time it was, mind too filled to even dream of trying to sleep at this point. He turned to his side, grabbing his phone from the nightstand as he unlocked it, opening his contacts and scrolling, staring at the number he had yet to text. When Shenhe had brought him to meet his mom that day, she had given him the number to her burner in case something happened, and just an easier method of communication in case his mother wanted to randomly see him again. He knew he should try to just forget what happened, try to move on, and not risk opening old wounds or making new ones.
“What’s one more…” He mumbled to himself in the dark room, fingers moving quickly across the phone’s keyboard as he typed out a message to her, a mix of ramble and questioning.
Chongyun:
I know you said only to text if I had to, but I need to know what the hell that was. I’m not the child you left all those years ago, I’m not someone you can tell to forget about it and have to listen, I want answers and deserve at least that much. I hate the fact you keep trying to treat me like I'm still 11 and need to be shielded from the truth even though I suffered you trying to hide it for YEARS only just to be told to hide that from the only other person who knows what it's like.
Why was my mom on the ground? Why were you guys still in town? How the hell did you guys end up running into my father? Is my mom okay?
Please Aunty Shenhe
He swallowed hard as he stared at the messages, glancing at the time. He sighed as he watched the clock hit 3:19 AM, confident that any sort of answer would not be granted to him for at least a few hours, especially considering all the shit that went down.
He turned back over, facing the ceiling once more as he placed his hand over his chest, phone still held tightly inside it in the hopes that maybe his aunt would be awake at this time and choose to read and respond. He should be trying to sleep; he had a test tomorrow, but he could not be bothered after everything. Maybe he could score another day before he had to take it if he got dragged into the counseling office or his teacher had witnessed the ordeal, that man is far too kind to make him sit through a stupid test the day after something like that, especially if he had seen it himself-
His phone dinged, causing him to practically jump out of his skin, stomach tying itself in knots as he quickly sat up, opening his phone to see what the notification was, hands pausing as he saw the contact name. What if it was bad? Did he really want to know? Maybe she hadn’t even responded to any of his questions and was just telling him to stay out of it again- He swallowed hard, deciding that it was too late not to at least see if she had answered any of his questions.
Aunty Shenhe:
Your mother wanted to look at the town she had left one last time before we took off again
Don’t know why that man was there, although he said something about a store and reeked of alcohol
I don’t know the specifics. I was in front of her when I heard her yelp and she was just on the ground. That man looked furious and was standing over her before I stepped in between them, you showed up only a few minutes afterward
She seems to be stable for now
Chongyun sighed. The answers may have been mostly brief, but an answer is an answer, especially from his aunt.
Chongyun:
Can I visit?
He stared at the screen for a hot second, waiting and waiting before finally getting a response.
Aunty Shenhe:
Maybe
He frowned but decided not to push, a maybe wasn’t a no, and as of now, she’s the only one who has any knowledge of his mother and all the control of whether or not he can visit her unless Chongyun decided he has nothing better to do except check every damn hospital within a 20-mile radius.
Save for the fact that Chongyun was, unfortunately, a senior and actually had to try and figure shit out real quick so that he could kinda take care of himself and graduate. He sighed, turning off his phone and setting it back on his nightstand, lying back down and closing his eyes. With some semblance of an answer, his thoughts had finally quieted down enough for him to try and sleep and, just in case his teacher felt mean, he should probably try and get some rest before that test he had.