Chapter Text
“Well, if everyone’s ready,” Nanami says.
“We’re ready!” Yu chirps, trying his best to compensate for his kids’ lack of enthusiasm.
He’s hoping his mood will infect them somehow and they’ll stop being so miserable, but Sukuna’s face crumples like he’s eaten something sour and Uraume holds their icy silence.
Looks like it’s going to be a long, long journey. Yu reassures himself that this is the best choice for his family, and treks on.
They walk solemnly, carrying what little they can on their backs, picking their way through the wilderness with no real goal other than the vague intention to move further north where it’s colder and emptier. Old memories return to Yu as their house disappears behind them—memories of the last time they did this. Despite all his years of hard work, he’s somehow right back where he started. Back then, Sukuna’s face was all bandaged and Yu could tell that his wound ached something fierce, but he put on a brave face for Megumi and Nobara.
The thought of it hurts Yu’s heart. He desperately needs to fill the silence somehow.
“It’d be cool to live by a river, right?” he blurts. “Fresh fish every day, and you don’t have to hike to take a bath. I wonder if we’d have to worry about the house’s foundation getting worn away, though.”
Nobody responds. Maybe out of pity, Nanami forces himself to fill the gap. “The sound of rushing water might keep you up at night.”
Discouraged, Yu smiles, nods and scrambles for a new topic. Deep down all he really wants to do is curl up on the ground and give up, but where would that leave the kids? What happens when they see their father, who they’re supposed to look up to, break under pressure? No matter what, he needs to keep trying.
…But it’s futile. Even though he bends over backwards to keep the mood light and conversational, nobody takes the bait. He’s forced to ramble endlessly to himself like a madman. I wonder what kind of bird that is? Oh, wow, what a pretty flower. Red might be my favorite color, although it really depends on my mood. Blah, blah, blah.
Sukuna and Uraume bring up the back of the pack, dragging their feet the whole way. As a last ditch effort to get them engaged, Yu proposes a hunt when lunchtime comes around. They haven’t hunted together for years; the novelty wore off once Yu assigned it to Sukuna as a chore.
“Huh?” Sukuna stares up at him with mild distaste. “Why? We already have food.”
Indeed, they do. Yu made sure to pack a hearty lunch for convenience, since they’d be walking their asses off for the rest of the day and he figured they’d be too tired to do anything else, but desperate times call for desperate measures.
“C’mon, it’ll be fun,” Yu tries to enthuse him. “I’m pretty sure I saw some rabbits just up that way.”
Sukuna makes a disinterested noise. “Do I have to?”
Yu wilts. Usually it’s Sukuna begging him for a sporting hunt, not the other way around. Have things really changed so quickly? He looks at Uraume, hoping to find some support.
“Why are you looking at me? I’m no good at hunting anyway,” Uraume says.
“Aw, c’mon, that doesn’t matter, it’s just for fun!”
Uraume shrugs. “It doesn’t sound like fun to me.”
When did they get so combative? It worries Yu a bit, and makes him wonder if his ignorant mistakes have taken root even deeper than he initially thought.
Ugh, and Nanami is staring at him. It’s so embarrassing!
To save face, Yu grins and picks himself up. “Well, I guess that means I don’t have to share!” he says, before prancing off into the trees with pep.
Once he’s sure he’s completely out of sight, he drags a hand over his face and groans, trying somehow expel all the pent up frustration inside of him. He hits a tree but all he gains from it are some split knuckles that glow an angry red with pain.
At one point, a rabbit hops by. It picks at the grass, its jaw scything rapidly around each mouthful. Yu debates killing it and taking it back to eat, but he doesn’t have the willpower. He watches it, its white winter fur almost glowing in the dreary undergrowth, until it turns and disappears with the whisk of its tail.
They do find a place to live, eventually. It’s a dusty old barn that stinks of livestock. Yu tries his best to build it up like a fun new opportunity, but nobody buys it and he ends up cleaning all on his own. The building is strong and sturdy, but the smell has taken root deep in the wood. He peels back the hardwood floor and finds dark stains that won’t budge no matter how hard he scrubs. He gets so obsessively fixated that he doesn’t even notice the sun slowly inching beneath the horizon.
Stupid, stupid stains. Dammit.
After Nanami is done securing a small campsite to tide them over, he steps in to see how Yu is doing. He seems surprised by the state he’s in. “Yu,” he says.
Yu looks up. Only then does he realise how downtrodden he must look; like a poor, abused washerwoman. His sleeves are pinned up to his shoulders and his collar has darkened with sweat. Strands of his hair cling to his forehead.
“Oh, Nanami, you’re done already?” Yu asks. Gotta act natural. He sits up and tries to set his brush aside, but his hands are cold and locked in place. It takes some effort to loosen up his muscles.
Nanami cuts straight to it without hesitation. “The kids won’t hate you forever just because you made them rough it for a few days. The weather’s decent.”
“Would it kill you to dance around the subject a bit?”
“Probably.”
Yu smiles bleakly. Then he looks down at the sudsy stain he’s been working at. Why does everything have to be so difficult all the time? He sighs. “Maybe I should go pick up some bleach or something. It’s fine. It’ll come up. Just gotta keep at it…”
He’s trying to reassure himself more than Nanami.
“Let’s call it a day,” Nanami says forcefully. “Come on. I’ll cook—if roasting meat over a campfire is indeed a form of cooking.”
Yu isn’t in the mood to eat, but it’s impossible to refuse Nanami when he gets all huffy about something. Yu sits in the grass beside the crackling campfire, absently pulling up weeds. Sukuna and Uraume have brought their pack of cards and they’re playing a private game. They don’t bother to invite him. The four of them eat together even though it feels like they’re all miles apart, and then they sleep under the stars. Yu’s exhausted eyes slide shut before everyone else’s.
He dreams of rows upon rows of glass tanks, all bearing tortoises of varying shapes and sizes. He points to one and a faceless shopkeeper produces it for him.
In the future, Yuji meets him and offers to take him to a nice restaurant for a bite to eat. Yu doesn’t really have a choice in the matter because he can’t resist the adorable attitude it comes packaged with.
“No big deal if you’ve got other stuff you wanna do. Just thought it’d be fun to chill. Like, together. You know. You and me,” Yuji says, trying to act casual even though it’s clear he’s a little bit nervous. His face is downturned but his eyes flick up hopefully, like a dog asking for treats.
Choso is standing loyally by his side with a stern look on his face. He puts his hands on his hips and turns his chin up as if to say, reject my brother and we're gonna have a problem.
“Sounds great,” Yu says. He’s stressed and he needs some time alone, but he truly wants to make Yuji’s day better. He’ll just have to stretch himself a tiny bit thinner, that’s all.
Yuji grins brightly. For a moment, he actually looks his age. It’s enough to remind Yu why he’s working so hard in the first place.
When they get there, Yu decides to order something sweet to take the edge off. He’s supposed to be watching his diet because he’s developing a tiny bit of a paunch, but you know what? Who even gives a crap anymore. And besides, he must’ve burned off at least month’s worth of calories carving his way through Shibuya—
Visions of blood and fire crawl into his brain and he winces. Better just focus on the banana bread. It’s warm and fresh, speckled artfully with sliced fruit and topped off with a little wad of cream cheese. The Heian era doesn’t have stuff like this so he should be grateful for the rare treat, but the taste is bitter on his tongue.
A random and pointless musing hits Yu: Sukuna hates sweet food, so he’d probably hate this.
“I’m sorry, by the way. Didn’t say that last time,” Yuji blurts out of nowhere.
Yu looks up with a raised eyebrow. He thinks back on their last outing and—aw, crap—he remembers how he lost his shit and started snapping at Sukuna right in front of the whole restaurant. Talk about airing out dirty laundry. No doubt Yuji’s nightmares were still fresh, and there Yu was, venting all his pent-up anger right in front of him! Got to fix this.
“No, Yuji, you didn’t do anything. This is between me and my son, okay?” He forces a smile and touches Yuji’s shoulder, trying to bolster his spirits. “I didn’t mean to, uh, get all snappy, it’s just that everything’s so stressful, you know? It’s not you, I promise.”
Yuji shakes his head. “No, that's not—I mean, well…”
After a few seconds of silence, it becomes clear that he’ll need extra encouragement to pop the cork off his feelings. “Go ahead, you can talk to me,” Yu says.
Just like that, it all comes tumbling out at once. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry I suck. I—ugh, how do I say this?” He covers his face with his hands. “I tried to vouch for you, but I’m Sukuna’s vessel, you know? So, I’m already on thin ice and now, without Gojo-sensei to back me up, it’s even worse. Apparently they were gonna, like, cancel my execution-suspension-thingy. As in, they were gonna execute me right away, then and there, for everything that happened in Shibuya! But now it’s all on you instead, even though you didn’t do anything wrong!”
“Well,” Yu tries to intervene.
But Yuji keeps going. “It’s complete bullshit! And then Nanami turned up and I totally dropped the ball. I swear, I’m usually quick enough to dodge Megumi’s shikigami! Most of the time at least. I’m glad you got away without getting too beat up. Wait, did you get away without getting too beat up? You didn’t get hurt, did you?” He peers worriedly through the gaps between his fingers, as if dreading the answer.
It’s charming, and it raises Yu’s spirits a bit. He laughs. “It’ll take more than a few youngsters to take me down!”
Yuji smiles, relieved. “That’s good,” he says, but then steadily the smile slides off his face as his worries accumulate piece by piece into an unconquerable mountain. “It must suck, waking up in this weird new world where nothing’s the same and suddenly you’re a fugitive. I thought I could show you some cool new stuff to make it seem not so bad, but... well, how’s your banana bread? Good? Please say it's good.”
Yu can read him like a book, because they are the same person after all. Right now, he’s no doubt desperately trying to concoct a plan to make everything right again, bearing the whole situation on his own shoulders and worrying obsessively about the blame he shares. It took Yu years of failing upwards to truly absorb the lessons he learned during therapy, but there’s no harm in giving Yuji some cheat codes to get him ahead.
“It’s good,” Yu says. “Thank you for bringing me here. I really needed the pick-me-up.”
Yuji smiles with relief. “Aw, man, Yu. How are you such a nice guy when Sukuna’s such a…”
“Brat?”
He flushes. “I wasn’t gonna use that word specifically, but, yeah.”
“Well, I don’t know.” He smirks. “Maybe deep down I’m not such a nice guy after all?”
“No way, you saved me when you could’ve killed me! And you trained with me, too! You helped me get my thoughts straight and you didn’t have to. I’m your son’s vessel, so you should want me gone, but you—you don’t!”
Woah. Now Yu is wondering if his standards were always so low. Everything Yuji just described amounts to nothing more than common human decency and it’s a little depressing that he doesn’t realise it. Well, there’s only one way to fix a problem like this: a good, old-fashioned pep talk. “Yuji,” Yu declares. “You are going to live a long life. You’re gonna grow up and get hitched and all that good stuff. I said this to Sukuna and I’m gonna say it to you, too.”
Yuji’s face is red again. “Aw, c’mon,” he protests, his eyes flicking around frantically in search of rescue.
Refusing to be ignored, Yu takes his younger self’s hands firmly in his own. “Take care of your one precious life. No matter what, I want you to keep living like something good’s waiting just around the corner, ‘cause it really might be. Doesn’t matter how dark and miserable it gets, I want you to promise me you’re gonna hang in there for the next big thing. There’s just as much good in this world as there is bad.”
All he gets in response is some jaw-flapping and an unintelligible “wuh–wuh–wuh” sort of noise, like a seal choking down a fish. Yuji’s flush has spread all the way to the tips of his ears. It’s funny, really. Grandpa Wasuke always kept his cards close, so overt displays of emotion like this always used to get Yu’s heart hammering!
The sound of a spoon clattering onto the table draws Yu’s attention. Choso, who has been quietly observing up until now, has stars in his eyes. He looks flustered, too. For the first time there’s some serious family resemblance between him and Yuji.
“Yu, that was amazing!” Choso gushes. “What a wonderful way to encourage someone who looks up to you! Please teach me?”
“Wait, huh?”
“Please? I want to inspire my brothers just as you did! I want to be as admirable as you!”
“I’m not listening to anything you say until you’re taller than me,” Yuji mutters scornfully.
Yu tries to intervene before Choso can explode and demolish the cafe out of grief and indignation, but he doesn’t get the chance to.
“There!” Nobara bellows from the restaurant’s entrance, her arm chopping violently through the crowd to point at them. Megumi is at her flank, hands together, ready to summon his dogs at a moment’s notice.
“Oh, crap,” Yuji whimpers, shrinking into his seat.
Too little, too late. The pair rush to their table, pale-faced with horror like they just walked in on Yuji placing his head upon a chopping block.
“Let me explain,” Yuji says frantically.
Nobara immediately snatches Yuji by the collar, dragging him forcefully out of his seat and, by extension, out of Yu’s reach. “Are you freaking nuts?!” Her voice is extremely high-pitched and she gives him a firm shake to get her anger across. “What is wrong with you, you dumbass?! You’ve got the self-preservation skills of a god damn lemming!”
Then she pinches Yuji’s cheek and pulls, hard. Yuji yelps like a dog, curling up and making himself small. Choso is attached to his back like a koala.
Man, that’s gotta be painful. Yu knows from experience how insane Nobara’s grip strength is and Choso’s desperate, bone-crushing hugs are nothing to scoff at either. Wincing with sympathy and feeling a bit guilty for his part in this whole situation, Yu smiles tries to explain himself. “It’s fine, Yuji here was just treating me to a meal, that’s all we—”
Nobara shoots a glare at him, her eyes cold, deadly and intense. Holy shit. If this is what curses see when they face off against her, Yu has no idea why they don’t all scurry off with their tails between their legs. He swallows nervously.
“What’s your game, creep?” she asks. There’s that dark voice Yu remembers so well. The one she uses when she’s in battle. “If you thought you could target Itadori just ‘cause he’s a dumbass, then somehow you must be even dumber than him.”
“Hey,” Yuji complains.
Nobara’s lips quirk with amusement. “What’s the phrase? When you hit the hornet’s nest, you get the swarm? Yeah, you mess with Itadori, you get the two of us!”
Megumi inclines his head.
“I think you made that phrase up,” Yu says playfully. Then he tries to put on a serious face. “Look, I promise, I’m not up to any funny business. I'm a perfectly normal guy. Here, we didn’t hit it off right so let’s start over. Nice to meet you, I’m Yu.” He offers his hand.
Megumi barges in, his fists clenched tight and his stance wide, poised for battle. “Back off,” he barks, sounding remarkably like one of his demon dogs.
Yu sighs. Maybe this situation is hopeless. Should’ve known they’d get caught within the hour. Subtlety was never his strong suit. Still, he really needs a little more time to digest his brunch before he starts getting into any fistfights. He’s getting to that age where indigestion and acid reflux are becoming serious obstacles in his daily life.
Time to make a graceful, cunning retreat.
“I didn’t want it to come to this, but…” He raises his hands, preparing to deploy one of his more obscure techniques. He suddenly points and shouts, “look over there!”
They all turn around.
He dips.
“Please let this work. If something, anything works, it’s got to be this.”
Yu approaches the entrance of their home. A week has passed since they started working on it and last night it was finally ready to welcome them in. The interior is still sparse and depressing, and only half the size of their last place, but at the very least it’s clean and dry. Nanami bid them farewell and returned to his apartment in the future, but not without extending an open invite.
"If you ever need a break," he said. "Or just a clean glass of water. I'm happy to have you."
He's too generous for his own good, honestly. And to think, people say he's cold!
Sukuna still spends most of his time outside, stubbornly prodding their old campfire back to life. He hasn’t said it outright, but it’s clear he’s struggling to adapt to all the changes Yu has thrust upon him, and he finds the house stifling. Because of him, a thin carpet of ash has unfurled across the grass, spread about haphazardly by the wind.
Yu coughs and wipes his nose clean. The kids know they’re supposed to dispose of ash properly, but they’ve been so belligerent lately, they barely follow any of the rules Yu lays out for them. Just—why? If they think Yu brought them here to punish them, they’re dead wrong. He’d go back in a heartbeat if he could! Maybe it’s selfish, but he wishes they’d try a little bit harder to see things from his point of view.
Oh, well. No use complaining about it. All he can do right now is press on. These are growing pains. Severe growing pains, yes, but still. Uprooting the kids from their beloved childhood home was never going to go down well, and it’s only natural they’d be too young and immature to accept it with grace.
That’s why he brought them a gift.
He looks down at the tortoise in his arms. Its legs are swiping through the air, struggling to find something solid to latch onto. It’s a baby, only as big as a hamburger and roughly the same shape, but the fun part will be nurturing it and watching it grow. For Yu, this tortoise represents a new beginning. He hopes the kids will agree.
He nudges open the front door a little awkwardly with his hip and steps inside. He set the kids to work hitching up a set of tapestries they spent so much time on a few years ago, but when he walks in he finds them right where he left them in a heap on the ground.
Steady, Yu, big smile…
He bottles up his frustration and roams about, searching for the kids. Whenever there’s trouble, nine times out of ten it’s Sukuna leading the charge and Uraume following in his footsteps. If he can get Sukuna to fall in line, Uraume should follow suit automatically.
“Hey, kids,” Yu says brightly, dipping into the empty space that has been designated as the kids’ bedroom.
There they are, poring over some of the books they brought with them. Important work, but obviously not the work Yu assigned them.
“Huh?” Sukuna grunts.
Yu is concealing the tortoise behind his back. “I got a housewarming gift for you guys.” Neither of them respond. They’re both pulling the same flat, disinterested face. Gotta forge on despite it. He presents the tortoise to them with a flourish. “And… here it is! Your newest family member! Everybody say hello!”
After a few seconds, Sukuna scowls with disappointment and slumps to resume whatever it is he’s doing with his books. Uraume joins him, because they’re such a loyal follower.
It’s difficult for Yu to figure out what his next move should be when he’s been given so little to work with. He shares a desperate glance with the tortoise, who seems sympathetic to his plight.
“Guys, c’mon, you’re gonna make him cry. At least say hello,” Yu says. He gently places the tortoise on the ground and it ambles around, familiarizing itself with its new surroundings in an unusually energetic way for such a solid creature. “He can eat all our leftover vegetables. Thanks to Sukuna, we always have tons of those.”
Sukuna decides to take this as an insult. “If you know I’m not going to eat them, stop making them.”
Yu frowns. “You’re gonna cap off at the height you’re at now if you don’t vary up your diet.”
“Whatever.”
“Ugh!” Yu explodes. “Look, can you just say hello to the tortoise? Please? Is that too much to ask?”
“Hello,” Sukuna snaps.
“Hello,” Uraume says afterwards.
Yu sighs. That’s probably the best he’s going to get.
They eat dinner together, with their currently unnamed tortoise crunching on some greens beneath the table. It’s just as oppressively quiet as when Nanami first came. At one point, Yu is forced to give up on trying to make conversation because it’s clear he’s getting nowhere. When they wash up and settle down for the night, that’s when Sukuna heads outside to mope around the campfire.
Yu watches him from the doorway. Guess this is as good an opportunity as he’ll ever get. After Sukuna stokes the flame and finds a comfortable place to sit, Yu joins him.
“Hey, buck,” Yu says.
Sukuna’s shoulders stiffen.
“You wanna tell me what’s on your mind?” Yu asks.
“No,” Sukuna says.
Yu watches the crackling flame for a while. “I love you, Sukuna. You know that, right?”
For the first time, Sukuna seems ashamed. “I know,” he mutters.
“Are you sure?” Yu wraps an arm around him and pulls him close. Thankfully, Sukuna doesn’t shrug him off, so for once his judgment is sound. “It’s okay if you’re mad at me, but you’ve gotta say so, otherwise it’s just going to get worse and worse and worse. Don’t lock it in.”
“You just…” Sukuna stops himself.
Excited to finally connect with his heart, Yu encourages him, “go on.”
“You just don’t understand what it’s like to be me.”
Yu wilts a bit. He thought that, as Sukuna’s father, he understood him better than anyone—maybe even better than Sukuna himself. “Okay,” he says, forcing himself to accept it even though he wants to passionately disagree. Now’s the time to listen and learn, not shut him down.
The mild response seems to bolster Sukuna and he continues, digging even deeper beneath the surface. “You think just because something’s easy for you, it should be easy for me, too. Well, it’s not. You think it’s all one way when sometimes it’s the other.”
“Okay, like…what? What did I do to make you think that?”
Sukuna grabs a stick and prods the fire aggressively. “You moved us here where things are just going to be the same anyway. What, were you scared people would hate you because they found out about me?”
“No, of course not.”
“You think people are nice to everyone just because they’re nice to you, but you don’t care what happens to me.”
“Sukuna, of course I care,” Yu protests. He tries to cup Sukuna’s face and guide him so that they’re looking eye to eye, but Sukuna snatches himself away. “You and Uraume are the most important things in the world to me!”
“I’m a burden to you.”
“Hey, that’s completely untrue!”
Sukuna turns to him and the campfire makes his eyes smolder like coals. “Is Nanami really your sensei, or is that just another lie?”
Yu’s heart sinks. “Of course he’s my sensei. Why would I lie about that?”
Sukuna takes a few moments to deeply study his expression. It makes Yu feel like the layers of his skin are being peeled back, leaving him bare. He knows instinctively that if he isn’t completely honest, he’ll be caught in an instant.
“Right,” Sukuna says. He starts coming at Yu rapidfire. “So, you knew him when you were younger.”
“Yes.”
“He taught you.”
“Yes.”
“To read and write? Or, just how to fight?”
“Just to fight.”
Sukuna thinks to himself, a small crease appearing on his brow. “What clan do we come from?”
Yu freezes. He’s been so overrun with a thousand other things that he hasn’t put a lick of thought to what he’d say in this obscure situation. All he can do is stare at Sukuna like a deer caught in headlights.
Sukuna becomes impatient. “Your name is Itadori,” he says. “There’s no such thing as the Itadori clan, so where does that name come from? There’s no word of it anywhere in any book I’ve ever read.”
“Well,” Yu begins.
He isn’t given the chance to say anything, because Sukuna presses on, sounding almost desperate. “You and Uncle Choso know blood manipulation, and that’s the technique of a clan that neither of you bear the name of. And my technique”— he raises his hand and flexes his fingers, as if bringing forth his technique to dance upon his fingers—“my technique is something only you and I share.”
“That’s… all true.”
“Who was my mother? Was she a Kamo, or were you?” Sukuna demands.
“No, I—” Yu pinches the bridge of his nose. “You see…”
“Did you want me?”
“Of course I wanted you.”
“You have some other home out there, but you pretend it doesn’t exist. You have other people to go to, I know you do, but you hide it from me. You’re all I have, but you just—” Sukuna cuts himself off right when he’s on the cusp of shouting. He grits his teeth and clenches his fists. “I can’t ever go where you do because I’m me, right? Same for Uraume. I’m right, aren’t I? You can’t go home because I’m a monster and they don’t want me there.”
Yu’s eyes widen. Now the pieces are slotting into place. He had no idea that Sukuna managed to figure all this out. How long has he been bearing this in silence? “Sukuna,” he says, the name coming to his mouth unbidden.
Beneath the hostility in Sukuna’s eyes lies desperation. “I can’t ever be part of your family the way you’re part of mine. There’s a home out there you could go back to, but I can’t—I can’t do that. The only home I had was the one you made me leave behind.”
“You are my home, Sukuna,” Yu says certainly, desperately needing Sukuna to believe him. “I chose you. I fear for you. For your safety. Both of you. Because I love you, and that’s the honest truth.”
Sukuna’s eyes shine like glass, bright and wide with something close to—fear? “Then—then—” He takes a deep breath, and his next word cracks. “Then let’s just go home! To our real home! If your clan won't accept Uraume and I as yours, then they can go to hell! Why won’t you let me kill them? They’re hunting us like animals and won’t let us live in peace! If I’m the one that matters most, why won’t you let me sever that bond?!”
“Because we don’t kill. I won’t let you be a killer.”
Sukuna turns sharply away from him. “You think it’s that simple.”
Yu tries to pull him in again, to embrace him, but he’s shrugged off. “Sukuna,” he entreats him.
“I hate you,” Sukuna says. “Just like I thought, you don’t know anything about me. You'd be better off if I was never born. Don't tell me I'm wrong, because I know it's true. Whatever. This whole conversation was a waste of time.”
Between them, the fire snaps and crackles, spurting tiny embers into the night air.
“What you just said, that really hurt my feelings, Sukuna,” Yu says quietly. He opens his mouth to say something more—something thoughtful and mature—but he can’t. His throat feels tight, like the very beginnings of tears. This isn’t a situation he can deal with right now, so, like always, he’ll just have to go and take the coward’s way out.
He gets up, dusts himself off, and goes for a walk. Sukuna doesn’t stop him.
The night sky here in the Heian era makes for such a pretty painting. Yu stares up at it, getting lost in it, trying to read some kind of sense in the chaos. How many years has it been since he slowed down and enjoyed the natural wonders here? Too many. As he walks, he reaches out, allowing waxy leaves to thread through his fingers. He finds a nice dry place to sit and relax. Unbidden, his eyes begin to drift shut. It’s a chilly night, but the temperature is soothing, cleansing, in its own special way.
He dreams of their pet tortoise shifting beneath piles of vegetables, searching for the tastiest morsel.
“Boo.”
Yu’s eyes snap open—
Pointless formality, all of it. A part of Uraume resents Sukuna’s curiosity—or perhaps it’s boredom that makes him insist upon attending these miserable events. Either way, they are sick of sitting in silence and waiting for it all to run its course.
Upon the dais, the two of them receive paltry, meaningless gifts that aren’t worth the effort it takes to dismiss them. To their left, a rich meal has been laid out upon the table, waiting to be eaten. Exotic and precious ingredients to these uncultured villagers, no doubt. The biggest, fattest fish in the lake; jewel-like fruits and berries; the finest rice, the earth’s best effort.
Uraume turns from it all in disgust. It feels like an insult. How can any of this mend the hole left by Yu’s death?
Needing a distraction, they busy themself with Mamesuke, their tortoise, who has also received his fair share of offerings. Sukuna made it clear to the villagers last season that to exclude Mamesuke from the festivities was a grave insult punishable only by death. Now it seems the mistake has been over-corrected. Mamesuke’s shell has been adorned in fine silk that until now only an emperor could’ve worn, and twisted rice straw has been tied into a decorative knot over his head, making him look like some kind of sacred stone. He is currently chewing his way through a mountain of greenery. Uraume pets him on the head and his deep black eyes, filled with the warmest concern, flick up to meet their own. Uraume can see their reflection within them like looking into a pool of clear water.
“We’ll be home soon, Mamesuke,” Uraume reassures him.
Mamesuke makes a deep groaning noise, like a mighty oak’s branches shifting in the breeze.
Ah, hold on. Uraume licks their thumb and rubs away a small spot of blood on Mamesuke’s nose. After Sukuna found highly toxic peonies among the offerings, he of course killed the perpetrator and his family. Their corpses have been dragged out of the building, leaving only their blood as evidence they ever existed.
A few more corpses are amassed before the celebrations have concluded. Sukuna and Uraume depart in the night, leaving behind the majority of the gifts. Mamesuke keeps his silks and Sukuna keeps a bottle of cloudy sake. Out of pride, Uraume refuses to keep anything.
“Peonies,” Sukuna mutters to himself. “Of all things.”
The house is cold when they get home, since there has been nobody to tend a fire. As usual, Sukuna makes do with his winter haori. They part ways without bidding each other goodnight, and Uraume escorts Mamesuke to his own room. It's more of an enclosure, with insulated walls and soft grass bedding. Meticulously, Uraume removes the silks, folds them and puts them away.
Hours later, they find themself padding through the house alone. They’ve been struggling to sleep lately, so they’ve decided to pass the time by reading a book in the quiet solitude of the library. The small, well-tended shrine beside the door dedicated to Yu seems to have been recently visited. Sukuna has poured a cup of sake for him and it's still warm to the touch. When Uraume slides the door back, sure enough, they’re met with the sight of Sukuna stooped over the writing desk, a single candle burning away beside him. He doesn’t react to Uraume’s entrance, though he surely senses them.
Uraume sighs. “You’re still working on that poem.”
Sukuna doesn’t turn around. “I thought it might give me some comfort to excise my thoughts onto the page.”
“Have you had any luck so far?”
“No.”
Uraume sits beside him. Sukuna hasn’t written much, even though he’s been attempting to complete this particular piece for months now. Most of the words are a disjointed and meaningless stream of consciousness.
Cracking ice, cold and flavorless, stuck under my fingernails, the smell like rotten deer.
“I’m not a poet,” Sukuna says, wadding up the paper and tossing it aside.
Uraume obediently hands him a fresh sheet. “Yet you keep trying to be.”
He stares at the blank page with disdain.
“Talk to me,” Uraume offers. “Perhaps that will be a sufficient enough excision.”
Sukuna hesitates for a moment. “I shouldn’t have acted the way I did.”
“It’s pointless to ruminate on things that are only true in hindsight.”
“We were still in danger. I should’ve known that.” Sukuna breathes in deeply, looking up at the dancing shadows cast on the wall. “I rejected his last attempt to connect with me, and now I…”
He stops.
“I’m still listening,” Uraume reassures him.
“A long time ago, before you, he’d cook for me all the time,” Sukuna continues. “Very often I’d refuse to eat what he’d make, and he’d look so disappointed. You don’t like it? That’s what he’d say. I can’t replicate his tone of voice. He’d try very hard to interest me in new things and I didn’t appreciate any of it.”
Uraume glances down. Without realizing it, Sukuna has begun to write again, but in a burst of frustration he wads up this attempt too.
“What a waste,” he spits. “All I can think about are those words and that damned face. You don’t like it? You don’t like it? Of course I don’t like it!” He throws himself down on the desk and covers his head with his hands.
Uraume waits for a moment so that he can process his emotions in some semblance of privacy, before reaching over and taking one of his hands and holding it tight. They sit together until the candle burns out and plunges them in darkness.
The sound of a door sliding open disturbs the silence.
“Buck?”
“Boo.”
Yu’s eyes snap open. For a moment he thinks he somehow passed out in front of the bathroom mirror, but no, it’s not a reflection staring back at him. It’s his own reanimated corpse, complete with a neat, horizontal incision bisecting the forehead.
His—Kenjaku’s eyes crinkle into slivers as his stolen smile widens. He joins their hands together. “Hope you don’t mind me snuggling up here. It’s so cold tonight.”
“What,” Yu whispers, his whole body locking in place. He doesn’t dare move, doesn’t even dare breathe.
“Is there something on my face?” Kenjaku asks playfully.
Without moving his head, Yu glances around, trying to figure out where his kids are. Still at home? Asleep? Gone? Hurt? He begins to tremble. Once he makes the first move, he needs to be ready for any outcome. He won’t get a second chance. He’s still alive right now, so that must mean Kenjaku still chose to reanimate him, but that fact could easily change.
“Get out of my body and get away,” Yu says and is surprised by his own venom.
Kenjaku is unaffected. “Or what?”
“Or…” His heart sinks. He has absolutely no idea what he could possibly do.
A small chuckle. “Yes, that’s right, you get it, don’t you? I have your little life right in the palm of my hand—”
Sukuna erupts from his seat. For a moment Uraume envisions all the candles igniting at once, but this is only an illusion caused by the oppressive force of his swelling cursed energy.
There’s a figure in the doorway, carved from the darkness by the thinnest strand of blue moonlight. They reach in, their hand finding purchase on the wall, and they use it to guide themselves up the short step in the doorway.
The villagers know not to disturb them, upon pain of death. Who would be so foolish as to disturb them here? A traveler, maybe? An overconfident sorcerer?
“I’ll give you five seconds to state your business,” Sukuna says curtly.
“Woah, woah, hey,” the intruder says with the tone of a farmer trying to calm his raging livestock. They continue, their voice falling to a whisper, “hey, hey, it’s alright.”
Sukuna seems disturbed by this. He takes a single step back. “This isn’t a matter of me sparing your life. Sate my curiosity before I kill you. If I’m entertained, I’ll make it quick.”
“Buck, just wait a second, it’s only me!”
“Who are you?”
Something is wrong. Uraume knows this instinctively. Their heart races. “Sukuna,” they say, alarmed.
Sukuna’s eyes, only a glint in the darkness, widen, unused to seeing Uraume like this. Immediately, he slips an arm behind his back and, in one quick movement, lights the candle on his writing desk.
The man in the doorway shields his face from the light. It’s only a tiny flame, but if he’s been trudging through the wilderness, then his eyes won’t be used to it. After a few seconds he adjusts and, slowly, reveals himself.
It’s Yu.
Uraume hears Sukuna’s quiet intake of air.
Yu is exactly as they left him. Only the outfit is different; thicker and heavier, swamping him and making him seem more fragile. His face is worn and tired, but it has always been that way. His eyes are the thing that always brought him to life. Right now they’re glittering like coins. The only sign that any time has passed are his crow’s feet, borne from too much laughter.
“Yu,” Sukuna says.
Yu raises his hands to show that he’s unarmed. “Yeah, it’s me. It’s only me. I’m home.”
There’s a voice in Uraume’s head bleating no, no, no, hard and loud as a fist banging against wood.
“I knew you’d come back,” Sukuna whispers. His breath shudders on every inhale as if he’s on the verge of sobbing. “All these years the world tried my faith, but I knew.”
Yu’s eyes narrow into crescents as a sad smile digs into his cheeks. “Aw, buck. You waited for me.” He spreads his arms to welcome Sukuna into a hug.
Sukuna takes one step and then loses his strength, falling heavily to his knees. Yu swoops forward, catching him and holding him tight. Despite how much Sukuna has grown, he looks like a child again as he digs his face into Yu’s stomach. His trembling hands claw into Yu’s haori, taking violent fistfuls as if at any moment they could be torn apart.
“It’s okay, I’m here for you, I’m here,” Yu soothes him.
With each word, Sukuna is broken down, like a chisel being taken to stone until finally he shatters. “Father,” he says, sinking further into his embrace. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry for everything. I didn’t mean what I said back then, truly. I regret it every day.”
“It’s okay, I know. It’s okay…”
Uraume finds that they still cannot move. Their feet remain frozen to the ground.
Yu’s face is pressed against the top of Sukuna’s head. His eyes are closed as if asleep as he absorbs Sukuna’s presence, seeming strengthened by it. Then, slowly, they slide open and fix upon Uraume.
For a moment, Uraume sees.
There’s no warmth whatsoever in those cold, dead eyes. They’re hard like glass; the eyes of a corpse, empty, almost translucent, allowing insight only into the back of Yu’s skull. Then it’s gone. Yu blinks and the crack in his armor is mended. His eyes become bright, warm and earnest, as they should be.
“Uraume,” he says with overwhelming relief. “I’m so happy to see you. Oh, look how much you’ve grown! Come here.”
For some reason, terror prickles up Uraume’s spine. They can feel goosebumps on their skin and the hairs on the back of their neck standing up. Something is horribly wrong.
Sukuna looks up, noticing Uraume’s hesitance. “Uraume,” he calls, confused, insistent, not wanting Yu to go without their love for a moment longer.
Uraume swallows. They’ve been left with no other option but to play along. Slowly, cautiously, they approach and wrap their arms around Yu.
He’s cold in a way that goes beyond temperature. His arm, slung around Uraume’s back, presses into them almost painfully. His fingers feel rigid like fangs. Does he know that Uraume knows?
“I missed you both so, so much,” Yu says. “Holy crap, you need to fill me in. What have you been doing all this time? Sukuna, look at you—look at your hands! I remember when you were only this big and now look at you. Like an emperor! Uraume, you look like a character in a book! I mean that in a good way, you know.”
“I’ll make tea,” Sukuna says. “I remember how you taught me.”
Yu gushes. “Tea made by my son! I never thought I’d be here again. Sorry.” Tears well in his eyes and he covers his face bashfully.
“Don’t cry,” Sukuna reassures him with a pleased smile on his face.
Enraptured by one another, they fail to notice Uraume’s suspicious silence.
A small chuckle. “Yes, that’s right, you get it, don’t you? I have your little life right in the palm of my hand. But that’s how it always has been, no?”
“Let me go.”
“I was only trying you on for size, but imagine my surprise when I saw all that’s to come!”
“Stop.”
“I never imagined that the monster you call your son would achieve so much.”
“Not Sukuna,” Yu pleads. It comes out on accident at first, but once the dam has been broken, he throws himself into it with frantic desperation. “Not the kids, please.”
“I thought to myself, if only you’d stop trying to hold him back.”
The route home is a straight shot somewhere to the right. Hopefully Sukuna and Uraume went to bed instead of getting up to more mischief, because Yu needs to protect them first and foremost. It doesn’t matter what happens after that as long as he has them in his arms.
“I can see that mind of yours working a mile a minute,” Kenjaku says. His hand slithers up and cradles Yu’s face with sickening affection. “I understand you now, Yuji. Can I give you some advice, one parent to another? Take a break. Rely on others. Put your feet up and let me handle it for a while.”
Yu holds onto Kenjaku desperately, but it does nothing to anchor him as he vanishes into the darkness of non-existence.
