Chapter Text
Shane feels… weird is the best word he can think of. The hallways in the bowels of the Metros arena are as familiar to Shane as his own apartment, but everything feels different now. Or maybe it's him that's different.
Shane was always more contained when he was a Metro. He had to play the perfect captain, the calm composed leader who could never show too much emotion. He could never tell if he was doing a good enough job at hiding, or if people suspected. It has always been overwhelming, but it was his home once. The team that took a chance on him, that made him the player he was today.
No matter how it had ended, Shane Hollander has spent close to a decade in Montreal, and it has left its mark on him. Walking those halls but going to the visitor's locker room was a strange feeling. Walking those halls and wearing a different jersey was a strange feeling.
Ilya walked beside him, and he could see Bood’s back in front of him as he joked around with Wyatt. Shane took a deep breath and made the conscious decision to relax. It didn't matter. The complicated feelings could wait till after the game, when they were back in their hotel room with Ilya’s arms around him.
He took another deep breath and turned to his side to smile at his boyfriend. Ilya looked into his eyes for a moment, and whatever he saw in them must have been enough to reassure him because he smiled back before lightly bumping Shane’s shoulder with his own.
Bood shouted something from the front and Troy answered from way in the back. Shane didn't catch the exact words but he knew they were mildly offensive because of the way Ilya was sputtering beside him. He just let out a small laugh as his boyfriend ran forward and tried to tackle Bood, Wyatt’s arm the only thing keeping them both upright. God, I love this team, Shane thinks to himself.
Something catches his attention at the edge of his eye. A blue jersey standing outside the home locker room.
“Hayden?” The Centaurs part around him naturally as they give him space when he stops walking.
“Shane! Hey!” The greeting is loud, and Shane sees the way it lights up his best friend's face when he realises who called his name. But Shane also doesn't miss the far away look in his eyes before their interaction.
He walks closer automatically, and Hayden opens his arms. Stepping into them is as easy for Shane as breathing, the Metro being the only person outside of his team and parents allowed to be so familiar with him. Oh and his wife, ofcourse. How could he ever forget Jackie.
He wraps his own arms around Hayden, squeezing him in a quick hug. He can feel his ribs through the shirt, even though the hug could not have lasted more than 10 seconds.
“How's it going, buddy?” Hayden’s voice brings him out of his musings.
“Good, good. But you'd know that if you answered my calls. I feel like some scorned lover, man.”
“Scorned lover? What have you been watching, Jesus,"
“Don't avoid the question, Hayd.”
“Dude, I was taking a shower! I didn't hear the phone ring!”
“Oh, and you couldn't have called me back in the next 4 days? What, you moved into the shower?”
“I forgot, Shane. Sorry, I'll do better next time.”
“Don't apologise, it's fine. I was just worried when you didn't reply.”
“I'm fine, bro. What's gonna happen to me?” Shane could see the way Hayden was avoiding looking at his eyes when he said that last line.
“Asshole,” Shane decides to let it go for the moment. They both have a game to play, but he promises himself he'd get to the bottom of the problem after.
“I'll see you after the game, yeah? Wanna go out with me, have dinner? I'll even ditch Ilya for you,”
“Nah, it's cool man, I don't wanna give Rozanov more of a reason to kick my ass on the ice today. Besides, I'm sure the boys will wanna go out when we kick your ass tonight,”
“Keep dreaming, Pike,” That was Ilya’s voice, and when Shane turns around he can see his boyfriend come up to stand beside him.
“Rozanov! How's it feel, being on probably the worst team in the league?”
“I don't know, Pike, why don't you tell me?” Shane just rolls his eyes, already too used to them going at each other. He's also like 70% sure they're joking these days. They think they're being sneaky, but he sees how Ilya doesn't pull on the playboy Russian act around the Pikes anymore. He also sees the joy in Hayden's eyes every time Ilya teases him with less malice than the last.
He takes the opportunity to take a closer look at his best friend. Jackie was right, he does seem to have lost weight. Shane can also see the dark circles under his eyes, the pale look to his skin even after the gameday adrenaline should have kicked in.
“Come, Shane. It is time for my Captain's speech,”
“Oh I'd pay to see that. Is it all about how you're going to destroy your enemies like the Red Peril?”
“Wouldn't you like to know.”
“Nah, these days Ilya is more of the supportive, encouraging Captain type,” Shane cuts in instinctively, always ready to defend his boyfriend before he remembers who he's talking to.
He also doesn't miss the look that comes over Hayden's face at his words. He could almost call it longing.
He turns to Ilya to see that the Russian is already looking back at him. His boyfriend saw it too.
“Well, I best leave you two to it. Have a good game, man,” Shane pats Hayden's back once before he and Ilya start to make their way towards their locker room.
“It's not just me, right? I'm not just seeing things?”
“No, no. I see it too. Something is wrong.”