Chapter Text
The days pass but ER stay the same. Chaotic, busy and tiring.
Trinity takes cases, directs her med students, consults her superiors and gossips with the nurses. She also talks to Crash and Huckleberry, making sure they get their dose of annoyance from her teasing.
Despite keeping herself busy, her mind works overtime. Flashes back to the small moments that keep pilling up.
About a specific attending.
Who doesn't make it easy on her, and Trinity has to admit, she's developing a crush.
And it's not like it's just because Dr. Al-Hashimi checked her head when she drunkenly fell while hunting down Bastian. Soft, light hands mapping the back of her head, the concern in her voice, the decisiveness with which she made sure Trinity and Bastian got safely to their apartment.
Or the time she fixed her collar while she and Ogilvie came to her for consultation.
The moments keep pilling up. Small but significant.
At least to Trinity.
She can't help the stiffness that blankets her when she's in the middle of the chaos of a trauma patient and someone leans over her shoulder, observing what she's doing.
It's true that the trauma room is crammed with people as this was a real bad case and there's not enough room around the table for everyone to see properly, but feeling the presence right behind her back and getting a whiff of floral perfume with hints of spices just renders her useless for a second.
Or hands on her hips, moving her out of the way and to the side without a second thought from the other woman but Trinity stands stunned for a moment, the places where her Al-Hashimi's hands touched burning hot as if her touch got seated into her skin.
Then there are times where it's simple phrases that get her all heated, like reminding her to hydrate when the attending is on her Hound day (the ER started to call the days she brings Kiwi along like that), or when she praises her for doing good with a case or staying on top of her charting.
The praise especially make Trinity duck her head when the older woman turns her back and her cheeks to heat up, colouring red.
And maybe the biggest problem, and another big contribution factor, is their neighbor situation, as Trinity runs into the doctor quite often with Bastian's escapes and Al-Hashimi's frequent errand runs and Kiwi's walks.
Trinity deduces she's in serious trouble. Having developed a crush on her attending.
That's a recipe for a humiliation ritual.
What's worse is that she knows Huckleberry is getting suspicious of her.
She caught him looking at her funny after her interactions with Dr. Al-Hashimi a few times now.
Trinity knows that look.
That's why she isn't nearly as surprised when she's laying on the couch, watching some reality show on the TV in their shared apartment when Dennis walks in and asks her "So... You and Dr. Al-Hashimi?"
"What about it, Fuckleberry?" She tries to deflect, but she knows Dennis knows her better than that and he wouldn't fall for it.
"You know what I mean, Trin." He insists and Trinity pointedly makes sure to keep staring at the TV.
"You like her..." He continues, trailing off.
Trinity sighs, "I don't know what you're talking about, Huck. Robot Doc is okay at best, infuriating at worst."
"Come on, Trin. Don't be like that, you know I won't judge you, right?"
Finally, Trinity looks away from the TV and at Dennis. His features are softened by sincerity.
"You've got me." Trinity raises her hands up in a peace offering.
"What are you going to do about it?" He asks.
"Nothing. She doesn't look like the type that would date their resident, much less hook up." Trinity hums.
"And me and Garcia are still... Unresolved. I'm not going to be a bitch and start something when I haven't finished the other thing." She tells him.
"Okay, then what's up with you and Garcia?" He probs further.
"Nothing, we haven't seen much of each other since the 4th..." Trinity trails off, thinking back to the last time they did see each other.
They did semi-frequenty ran into each other in the ER, especially when Yolanda came down to consult a trauma or her surgical skills were acutely needed.
Didn't mean they said much to each other. Trinity was still butt hurt by what happened on the 4th and Yolanda was still unavailable as before with stinging remarks about Trinity's "immaturity".
"I don't know, it's complicated." Trinity murmured.
"You two should talk." Dennis suggests.
"I know, it's just... Hard to talk with her without being shut down." Trinity complains.
"I'll try though... Soon." She adds.
True to her word, Trinity does seek out Yolanda next time she sees her in the ED.
"Can we talk?" She asks.
"About what, Trinity?" Garcia asks in her usual tone.
"Us?" Trinity continues.
"What about us?" Yolanda asks.
"Everything. We haven't talked much since the 4th and I don't know where I stand with you!" Trinity hurls out, suddenly angry at the continues dismissal.
Garcia gives her a look that tears Trinity's chest right open.
"I don't know, Trinity." She tells her, her tone harsh. At least to Trinity it is.
"Forget it." Trinity bites out, turning on her heel and walking away.
"What do you mean, 'forget it'?" Gets shouted after her, the words echoing through the empty stairwell.
Trinity spins around, hands balled into fists. "I mean forget that I asked, forget that I cared and forget about continuing whatever the fuck we had going on!" She snarls, hurt and anger swirling in her chest.
Despite her growing feelings for Al-Hashimi, she still had some left for Yolanda. She cared for her.
Not anymore.
With that Trinity storms away, past the nurses station where she startles Dennis with a grumbled "I'm going for a breather." And out the EMT entrance to the ambulance bay, where she finally takes a deep breath.
She sits down on a curb, watching her hands silently and willing herself not to cry.
She sits like that for a while, she's not sure how long exactly.
Then, footsteps. Approaching.
Soon a wet nose nudges at her cheek, forcing her to look up at the newcomers.
Dr. Al-Hashimi and Kiwi.
Kiwi settles down next to her, laying her head in Trinity's lap.
"She's trained for PTSD as well." Al-Hashimi says quietly.
The older woman sits down on her other side.
"Are you okay?" She asks.
"Yeah, just peachy." Trinity murmurs.
"Would it be too invasive to ask why?"
A pause as Trinity thinks.
"Falling out with someone, don't know why it got to me so much." She eventually whispers.
A comforting hand settles on her lower back.
"Relationships are hard. People come and go." Al-Hashimi offers.
Trinity's hands itches to reach out to the other woman, so she engaged them in a different activity; petting Kiwi.
"Yeah." Trinity murmurs quietly.
They sit in a silence for another while until an ambulance arrives with an acute trauma patient and Trinity is forced to jump into action.
Dr. Al follows after, but doesn't engage, she can't. Not with Kiwi there.
So she returns back to her office.
When Trinity and Dennis get back home, Dennis can't help but asks about her little break outside.
"Talked to Garcia like you suggested." She tells him.
"And?" He asks, pensive.
"Didn't go well, I'm sure you could guess." Trinity bites out.
"I'm sorry about that." He says and offers her a wordless hug.
Trinity declines, although very politely.
She didn't want to seem vulnerable, hated feeling like that.
They settle into silence, both scrolling on their phones in their living room.
"Robo Doc came to comfort me." Trinity breaks the silence.
"Really?" Dennis asks excitedly.
"Yeah, it was... Nice." She tells him. "Nice of her, I mean." She fumbles but Dennis is already smirking at her.
"Fuck off, Fuckleberry." She groans.
"Not a chance, Trin." He laughs. "Did you thank her?"
Trinity stops, "no, I didn't get the chance." She says.
"An ambulance came with that dude with infarct. The ginger one?" She adds.
"Well, maybe you could use it as an excuse to bond some more?" Dennis suggests and Trinity actually considers it.
"What are you thinking?" She asks.
"Your pie are really good. Maybe invite her over for a slice?" He suggests.
"That's weird, why would I thank her by baking for such a simple gesture as comforting me?" She questions. Using just todays kindness wasn't enough of an excuse to spend more time with her.
"Oh, you can say it's also for how much she helps with Bastian?" Dennis offers.
Trinity thinks about it. It was true Al-Hashimi was very helpful anytime she witnessed Bastian's antics.
"That could work," Trinity agrees.
"Okay! That's set!" Dennis' giddiness was contagious as Trinity herself felt butterflies at the thought of spending some time outside of work with the other woman.
If it was from nerves or her crush acting up, she didn't know.
She got to baking not even half an hour later.
Trinity was a stress baker, a habit she picked up by her therapist's suggestion as a healthier coping mechanism.
She learned a lot of recepies. She was good at this by now.
Deciding wasn't hard, her top picks to bake were brownies and cheesecake.
Last time she baked she did cheesecake, so this time it was time to do brownies.
Trinity got to work and gradually felt herself relax.
Tomorrow was weekend and she had a day off. She's sure she also saw Dr. Al-Hashimi off. So that should work out.
It's late, almost 1 AM when she's done and she's totally exhausted as she falls to bed.
True to Trinity's word, when she gets up on Saturday morning, although with jitters, she walks down the hallway and knocks on the Al-Hashimi residence.
She doesn't expect a young man to stand in the doorway when her knock gets answered.
"Yes?" The guy asks.
"Uhhh... I'm looking for Dr. Al-Hashimi?" Trinity asks, nervous.
She was confused. Was this Al-Hashimi's partner and was she overstepping? She didn't even know if the woman liked other women.
For god's sake Trinity! She cursed herself.
"Māmān!" Is yelled out into the flat and Trinity deflates.
Mom, he was calling for his mom. Dr. Al mentioned she had a son, right?
Now Trinity takes a closer look at him.
He's tall and somewhat lanky. He has shorter curly dark hair and darker skin, just like his mother. He also inherited her eyes, only a shade lighter.
Then, he steps aside, disappearing from Trinity's view as he retreats back to his home. Standing in the doorway instead of him is Baran and Kiwi.
"Dr. Santos? How can I help you?" The other doctor asks puzzled.
Trinity swallows.
"I, I wanted to thank you for your help with Bastian and also for yesterday so... I baked a cake, if you'd like a slice?" She fidgets with her hands, hiding them behind her back.
The older woman looks surprised before her face lights up.
"There's no need to thank me like this, but I can't say no to a good cake. I don't mean to be rude, but can I steal an additional slice for my son?" Al-Hashimi rambles with a smile.
"Sure, he can come with if he wants." Trinity suggests, silently praying he won't so she has some time with the other woman and at the same time wishes for him to come with so she doesn't have to have her full attention.
"He's going out with his friends, I'm afraid he can't join in." Dr. Al tells her sadly.
"Okay, nevermind then." Trinity mumbles, relieved and stressed at the same time.
"It's... Can you come over for it? I can make coffee or tea?" Trinity invites.
"Sure, if Kiwi can go as well?"
"Yeah, of course." Trinity agrees.
They walk together to Trinity's apartment and the younger one makes sure Bastian doesn't try anything while the door is open. Kiwi happily watches the feline with great interest once they settle in the kitchen's dinning area.
Trinity brings over the brownies and cuts them into squares.
"They're really good." Dr. Al-Hashimi praises and Trinity feels a hot flush slide down her neck.
"Thank you. I bake a lot." She murmurs.
"You do? Wow, wouldn't have guessed." The older woman says with a laugh, Trinity smiles at that.
"Yeah, I don't seem like the type but I stress bake a lot." She explains. "Yesterday was a hard day and I couldn't sleep so I did this." Trinity lies easily, although it's only half lie.
They eat cake and converse, somehow coming back to the topic of baking.
"It was this or cheesecake, I didn't know which would be better so I went with brownies because I didn't make them in a longer time." Trinity explains.
"Awh, what a shame!" Dr. Al-Hashimi groans and Trinity freezes in fear.
"Don't get me wrong, your brownies are amazing!" Al-Hashimi quickly corrects herself when she notices Trinity's horror. "It's just that cheesecake is my favourite."
Trinity stays quiet for a moment and then says; "then next time I'll bake you that."
It's Al-Hashimi's turn to be surprised into silence. That is before her face softens into a smile. "Deal."