Chapter Text
Icchan quietly docked his submarine by the harbour. Nearby, people strolled along Osanbashi Pier, admiring the vista of the bay and city. A large cruiser stood by the port, waiting to accept its next passengers. Unfortunately, this was no time for casual sightseeing. On cue, Icchan’s watch buzzed. His boss’ face shone on the screen
“Nice to see that you arrived safe and sound, Agent I. The latest update I received from a nearby agent tells us that the pharmacist was last spotted in Chinatown.”
Couldn’t this agent have taken on the job instead? Icchan signed grumpily with two of his free arms.
“Unfortunately, the agent we currently have assigned to Yokohama is Agent S. She’s still a new recruit and is in need of much more advanced training. Considering the potential danger of this mission, it would have been ill-advised to send out a seagull that has, so far, only mastered the art of pooping on her enemies. I’m sure you can understand.”
Icchan rolled his eyes. The Greater Tokyo Area seriously needed more competent agents.
“Stay safe, Agent I. I’m counting on you.”
With that, Goroawase-sensei ended the call. Icchan swam towards the base of the harbour. He combed the wall for any metal grates or hatches. Finally, he spotted one covered in rust. Using his enhanced strength, Icchan tugged at the grate until it popped off. Traversing through the sewers certainly wasn’t pleasant, but it was much preferable to being gawked at if he were to walk aboveground. Additionally, since rivers of water flowed through the sewage system, he could travel under the city without worrying about running down the clock on his 30-minute no-water limit. In no time at all, he could smell Chinatown: the earthy scent of ginger, the hearty smell of roast duck, and the calming fragrance of ginseng. Based on the strength of the aromas, he was probably under a collection of restaurants. Searching for a grate that led to the surface, Icchan found one where the sun’s rays did not shine through the openings. Hopefully this one emerged into an alleyway, and not the middle of the road. Icchan gripped the sides of the grate heavily, hesitating to open it.
Okuto could be around here.
Okuto hadn’t mentioned where in Yokohama his class was going, so maybe they were someplace else. Then again, that was probably just wishful thinking. Any school trip to Yokohama worth its salt would visit Chinatown.
With luck, his class hasn’t arrived here yet. Maybe I can get this over with quickly.
Icchan slowly opened the grate, crawling out into the shade of an alley. Thankfully, no one else was around. His watch’s signal pointed to the street right next door.
He must be out there. Better find some place to hide so I can observe him.
Spotting a row of green bushes, he quickly sped towards it. Upon latching onto the foliage, his skin changed to match the same green shade. From this vantage point, he could see the back of his target.
Standing under the shade of a building was a tall man with a tuft of brown hair. Icchan could see why the reports Goroawase-sensei had received labelled this guy as a pharmacist: the man’s white lab coat certainly played the part. His green pants resembled the colour of seaweed, and his black dress shoes definitely stood out from the sea of running shoes and sneakers locals and tourists were wearing. He appeared to be talking to some people in front of him, though it was difficult to hear what they were talking about (was he asking for directions?).
If he weren’t wearing that coat, I’d think he was just your average European tourist.
After a minute, the pharmacist stepped aside and began walking with the people he had been talking with. By his side was a group of three adolescent boys. And one of them looked like-
!!!
Icchan’s three hearts nearly came to a full-stop.
Perry heaved a sigh of relief as the tunnel spit him back out onto the surface. He still felt as though parts of his body were being cooked alive.
Turns out traveling close to the centre of the Earth for a second time was just as unpleasant as the first.
The exhale of relief turned into a groan of frustration as Perry covered his eyes. After being enveloped by total darkness for almost ten minutes, he struggled to readjust to the blinding rays of the morning sun. After about a minute of blinking and rubbing his eyes, he was finally able to take in his surroundings. Below his feet was a circular tile with a rose insignia. Looking around, there were several rows of trees and large patches of well-manicured grass. He walked over to a sign surrounded by rosebushes.
Under the kanji, it read:
AMERICA-YAMA PARK
Huh, guess I shouldn’t be surprised the tunnel spit me out here.
He glanced at his watch. Heinz’s general signal seemed to be coming from the direction of a nearby tower, a bit to the west of it. Using his grappling hook, he latched onto the exhaust pipe of a nearby building. From the top, he could see the entirety of downtown Yokohama. Trying to pinpoint the location of the signal, Perry’s eyes landed on a tall gate with a pagoda-style roof. Assortments of red paper lanterns decorated the awnings of many buildings. Even from up above, he could hear the hustle and bustle of a place filled with life.
That must be this place’s Chinatown. What would Heinz be doing here?
The monotreme leapt across rooftops, making his way towards the red dot on his watch. No sooner than three minutes had passed before he finally spotted the doctor. Perry narrowed his eyes. The man didn’t seem to be carrying any sort of device or invention on him. That wasn’t the concerning part. Heinz seemed to be in a conversation with three…schoolboys? They looked older than the likes of his boys, Phineas and Ferb. Young highschoolers? Perry watched as a boy with chestnut-hair began walking with the doctor, the other two quickly following in pursuit.
Heinz rarely cooperated with others for his plans. The man preferred to rely solely on his own talent, skills, and pride. His daughter, Vanessa, had once acted as his assistant, but she had stopped wanting to partake in her father’s ridiculous schemes a while ago. Just what could have prompted him to seek the aid of three adolescents? (Unless the three schoolchildren were secretly evil, but that was highly unlikely)
Damnit Heinz, just what are you up to this time?
Taking care not to be seen, Perry began tailing the quartet. Several stories below, a certain cephalopod had the same idea.
A little earlier...
Nakamura stared sulkily at the others as they discussed where to have lunch in Chinatown.
To say this day had been a bust so far would be an understatement.
As expected, Hirose’s friends had clung to his side like leeches. Nakamura hadn’t been able to get a single word in! It didn’t help that he had been saddled with the responsibility of being the trip photographer. Curse that Takeuchi! The only positive thing about playing cameraman was that he’d gotten to take dozens of candid pictures of Hirose. (He’d show them all to Icchan when he got home!) But that didn’t help with reaching his goal of becoming friends with Hirose! The words from the fortune slip kept ringing in his head.
YOU’LL HAVE TERRIBLE LUCK WITH EVERYTHING, ESPECIALLY ROMANCE. OSTENTATIOUSNESS IN PARTICULAR WILL DRIVE AWAY GOOD LUCK.
Yeah, that hadn’t helped with his confidence whatsoever.
Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed that Takeuchi and Mukai had left alongside Hamaoka’s group. That left him with just Oomori and…Hirose! Was his luck finally turning?
“What should we do now?” Oomori asked Hirose.
Hirose gave him a warm smile. “Let’s just go somewhere random. How does that sound? Any ideas Nakamura?”
“W-What? N-no guess not. I can’t think of anything…”
Dang it, why am I fumbling so bad?! Come on, Okuto! Don’t let that stupid piece of paper get to you!
Nakamura opened his mouth to give out a random suggestion, but before the words could come out, another voice interrupted.
“Excuse me kid, but could I ask for your help with something?”
W-Wha-
Standing in front of him was a man with some of the worst posture he’d ever seen. Seriously, if Mr. Niou were with them, he would give the man a lecture on the effects forward-head posture can have on long-term back pain. Over his black turtleneck, the man donned a white coat that resembled the apparel Nakamura and his classmates had to wear when working in Hoshimi High’s biology lab. The thing was, the man didn’t give off the air of a local teacher or pharmacist; he looked like a tourist from overseas. Why would a tourist be wearing something like that in Chinatown?
“Uh, hello, did you hear me right? I’m sorry, I’ve heard from some that my accent can be a bit much,” the man said.
“Ack! Sorry, I got lost in my own head!” He could hear Hirose and Oomori approaching from behind.
“What’s the matter, do you need something, sir?” Hirose asked.
The man rubbed his chin. “You see, I’m kinda looking for some bug spray for a…hiking trip. Would you guys happen to know where I could find that around here?”
“Bug spray?” Hirose asked. “I think your best bet would be at a convenience store.”
The pharmacist’s eyes lit up. “Great! Do you know where I can find one? I’m not exactly familiar with this place.”
Nakamura expected Hirose to just pull out his phone and show him the directions from there. He could not have been prepared for what the chestnut-haired boy suggested.
“Well, why don’t we look for one together!” Hirose smiled.
W-WHAT?!
Oomori raised his eyebrows. “Uh, are you sure this is a good idea? We don’t really know this guy. The teachers might get mad at us if we’re spotted with him.”
Hirose chuckled. “Don’t be such a worrywart, we’ll be fine! If a teacher asks, we can just say we’re helping someone in need. What’s your name, by the way?”
The pharmacist smiled. “It’s Heinz Doofenshmirtz, but you can just call me Doof.”
“Cool! I’m Hirose. These are my classmates Oomori and Nakamura. We’ll help you find that insect repellant in no time!”
“I’m not sure about this…” Oomori mumbled.
You and me both.
Ignoring Oomori’s quiet protests, Hirose began walking with Heinz. The childhood best friend quickly followed suit, with Nakamura not far behind. The boy clenched his teeth.
Great, now someone else has stolen Hirose’s attention.
Every second of that man wasting their time was time Nakamura could be spending trying to become friends with Hirose! Nakamura couldn’t help but grumble at the pharmacist. He wouldn’t let this Doof person try anything funny on Hirose. On his honour, he would protect his beloved crush from harm!
What Nakamura didn’t notice was the faint rustling of bush leaves behind him, and the small shadow being cast behind him from above.