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Chapter 2: Bow Down

Notes:

Made a whiskey lemonade and started writing. See ya'll on the other side.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Montreal Metros @MontrealMetros

Happy #ThrowbackThursday! We’ve heard you loud and clear. All three members of your favorite trio will be on the ice tonight! We hope you tune in! See you there!

Image Insert 1:

[Taken during Hollander’s 5th season with the Metros: From left to right. JJ Boiziau, Shane Hollander-Rozanoz, and Hayden Pike at a charity event. They’re dressed in formal wear and smiling at the camera. Hollander is holding a ginger ale.]

 

Its Metros 4 Lyfe @montrealmetrosfan1996

Take this down right now, oh my fucking god

 

Hollander’s #1 Girl @allabout24

Did Shane know y’all were posting this? 

↳↳Jelly Belly @gearheadbi

Better question, did ILYA

 

Its Hole-ander actually @hollalujah

Please cease usage of my client’s likeness IMMEDIATELY 

 

No It IS That Serious 🏒 @hockeyismylife46

You know, it gets to a point

 

Ex Montreal Stan @imonlyhereforhollander

This is weird. You're weird for this.

 

Shilya’s Third @lolaboutjaney

Montreal metros keep Shane's name outta your mouth challenge: failed AGAIN

 

Anya’s secret sister @allaboutthepuck

All that hullabaloo just to keep using Shane for marketing mama Yuna gonna sue yall

↳↳Ex Montreal Stan @imonlyhereforhollander 

@YunaHollander24

 

hollanov on top @itsashutout2 

Oh rent must be due…how soon are the bell centres lights getting cut off??

 

⚜️ Fly Lis Fly ⚜️ @mightymetrosgo

Everyone butthurt like Hollander didn’t play with them for a decade. Of course they still have pics of him.

↳↳ally 🏒 @allywallypally

It’s weird because they kicked him off the fuckin team

↳↳↳⚜️ Fly Lis Fly ⚜️ @mightymetrosgo

No one kicked him off the team. He left. Players leave. It happens. 

↳↳↳↳Cents and Centsability @goodgollymissmolly 

We’re at the point in the metros/hollander/tripgate saga where folks just deny it was ever that bad…fascinating 

↳↳↳↳↳let my cens fight @censgoaliestan

It’s gotta be whiplash for Shane





missing the Holz @metros4hollanov

At what point does watching ott/mtl with hope in my heart start to become self-harm?

🫩🫩🫩🫩





Tea Time 🫖 @itsteatimewithj 

We’re in the house tonight! Always fun to watch OTT & MTL duke it out

Photo 1:

[A photo taken from the inside of the Canadian Tire Centre. The stands are packed waiting for the game to begin.]

Video Insert 1:

[Commentator 1: Hollander looks good tonight. Clearly he’s been ignoring the noise off the ice.

Commentator 2: You don’t get to Hollander’s level without learning how to tune it all out. He’s always left it all on the ice.

 

hollanov on top @itsashutout2 

Ahem, Shane looks good ✨ every night ✨





missing the Holz @metros4hollanov

Theriault looks pissed. He and Gagnon keep getting into it and we’re not even at the end of the first.

 

Ex Montreal Stan @imonlyhereforhollander

I’m telling you he’s on the chopping block

↳↳Suffering Montreal Fan @gometrosgoiguess

Gotta be

↳↳↳Boiziau’s Baby Mama @JJBrescueme

Good. good fucking riddance. 



Tea Time 🫖 @itsteatimewithj 

Video Insert 1:

[Cheers can be heard in the background:

Commentator 1: Dubois just can’t keep up with Rozanov. The kid’s clearly doing his best but he’s getting circles skated around him

Commentator 2: To be fair to the kid, there aren't many players who can keep up with Roz. I can only think of one and—well. 

Commentator 1: (Kissing his teeth) yeah, it’s a shame.]

 

Its Metros 4 Lyfe @montrealmetrosfan1996 

At this point what do they expect Dubois to do bruh he’s one guy

↳↳Shane Hollander’s left tit @lilylaughsart 

Funny, Shane was just one guy too but no one wants to hear that





Cents Stan @centsoncentsoncents

Your honor, that’s my emotional support old married couple

Video Insert 1:

[Shane and Ilya Hollander-Rozanov can be seen out on the ice, knocking helmets.]

 

24♥️35 @allaboutshayden

Noooooo that's his and Haydens thing!!! Stop!!!!

↳↳Shayden Truther @shaydenlives2435

Rozanov takes everything 😫

↳↳↳caecilia 🙂@caellysworld

Nurse, they're out again 

 

Hollyander 🌱 @plantsandpucks

Hollzy on the ice in black and red 😒 it just ain’t right

↳↳caecilia 🙂@caellysworld

It’s been 84 years

↳↳↳Ra Ra Rozanov🐻@mrsraiders81 

Like, yall gotta get over it





Tea Time 🫖 @itsteatimewithj 

Video Insert 1:

[Commentator 1: Oooh and that did not go well for Olsson. You can feel the frustration from Metros players and fans tonight.

Commentator 2: They just can’t slow Hollander down.

Commentator 1: Who can?

Commentator 2: He’s on fire tonight!

Commentator 1: He always seems to find another gear against the Metros. I guess there’s still a point to prove.

Commentator 2: Is there? I mean Hollander’s already enshrined his name in the history books. He’s one of the greats.]



 

 

caecilia 🙂@caellysworld

Y’all saying Shane’s offline idk I think he saw that shit

 

Hollander’s #1 Girl @allabout24

Yeah he pulled out the belt and said bend over frfr

↳↳Shilya’s Third @lolaboutjaney

Straight BTA all night I know the Metros bus ride home finna be SILENT 😩





Hock-Tea😈 @HockTeaGossip

👀

Video 1:

[Clips of an interview taken from the post-game presser in the Ottawa Centaurs’ locker room following the Ottawa/Montreal Match-up. Several of the Centaurs can be seen milling around the background. Shane Hollander-Rozanov is in front of the camera wearing a thin underarmor tank:

Reporter: Shane, what went well tonight?

Hollander: (shrugs) We were really clicking tonight. At this stage in the season, I think everyone’s in a place where we can really perform. Always helps to have such a supportive crowd here at home.

Reporter: Shane, I don’t know if you’ve seen the discourse online—

Hollander: (shaking his head) I don’t really pay attention to that stuff.

Reporter: Of course. It’s interesting because John Cunningham recently had a lot to say about you.

Hollander: I apologize but I’m afraid I don’t know who that is. And if those are all the hockey related questions—

Reporter (from the back): What do you say to critics like Cunningham  who say, maybe you’re not as good as fans think you are?

Hollander: (shrugging) I say check the scoreboard and then show me someone better. You all have a good night.]

 

Ex Montreal Stan @imonlyhereforhollander

That’s my fucking champion 

 

caecilia 🙂@caellysworld

Yeah yeah shane’s good at hockey blah blah am I high or am I seeing bush?????

↳↳hollanov on top @itsashutout46

No you’re not high babe I stopped listening as soon I saw that lil sliver of belly and happy trail Ilya Rozanov I’m in your wallsssss

 

Ra Ra Rozanov 🐻 @mrsraiders81 

Good job computah

 

Shilya’s Third @lolaboutjaney

Shane Hollander's bush if you can hear me. Shane’s bush I'm speaking to you!!!

↳↳Its Hole-ander actually @hollalujah

Baby it only responds to Russian I fear

 

Cents and Centsability @goodgollymissmolly 

John Cunningham is gonna wake up tomorrow to the news that 1. Shane Hollander doesn’t know who he is (he definitely does but he’s hilarious) and 2. Shane’s Bush™ is more popular than him

↳↳ally 🏒 @allywallypally

Life is one funny motherfucker