Chapter Text
“Wait- Pluey! Not too much at once!”, the little die scolded his spouse, trying to hold back the hand that was feeding their child, “What if she does that food coma thing Zappers do?”
The other merely giggled, but obliged for his sake. It wasn’t that far-fetched of a thought, seeing as their daughter didn’t have a mouth like her Mama, at least not a typical one. She had to learn how to consume food by watching the Zapper first, but for her it seemed to work by lightly pressing the button that was her mouth with the food. It took a bit to figure that one out, and it was rather interesting to watch, even if it was kind of similar to how Zappers ate.
Their child – Tetra, as they’d decided to call her – was a real bundle of joy. While she was quiet, she loved to play and draw, and get carried around the house through all the rooms. Her silence was only a little worrying at first, as she very rarely even cried. The first time she did, Battat and Jongler thought it had been their other spouse and something truly terrible had happened to him. But it turned out it had just been their child, wanting her new favorite plushie she couldn’t reach on her own. It used to be the Shadowguy’s, the cat plush he had owned since he himself was a baby, that same one Battat had so lovingly restored after it had ripped apart. Tetra was instantly enamored with it the moment she laid her eye on it, and who was Pluey to deny his own child of it.
The three couldn’t be more proud – both of her, and themselves as well. They’d done the seemingly impossible, or at least the unknown if it actually was possible, they’d figured it out along the way, they’d persevered, and they’d made a wonderful little child together. She was happy and healthy, full of energy, a good mix of all three of them combined. All three of their likenesses couldn’t be denied.
And although they’d loved and cherished their kid, she had a few more surprises up her tiny little sleeves.
Not only the aforementioned saxophone speech came out of nowhere to them, but only a few weeks later, she’d actually started to cry more often, when at first she’d been so quiet. The source of her discomfort was relatively quickly revealed, as she was slowly growing a pair of legs in addition to her tail, almost reminiscent of a growing tadpole. So, one sleepless night, Battat was forced to re-tailor all those onesies he had sewn just for her. But since he couldn’t predict what else would happen – if she’d be losing her tail along the way like an actual frog or if she somehow grew even more legs – he decided to at least keep the torso part intact while changing the tail part to be like a skirt or dress.
After that though, everything had been like before, peace and quiet returning rather quickly to their home.
It was on this particular day that the trio (or perhaps now quartet?) had expected a visit from none other than the weather duo (or trio?). Jongler had invited them after they’d met the two while out on a walk once, mainly to introduce their kids to each other. Exchanging parental knowledge and experiences was another welcome bonus, of course!
Battat thought this whole thing was kind of unnecessary. He didn’t particularly like having other people in their home, but maybe that was because he still saw Mike’s room as the three’s secret base, as their own little place they could be by themselves without being bothered. Their personal little sanctuary of sorts.
Not to mention the awkwardness of having to hold conversations with people he barely knew or talked to. Yes, he had babysat their daughter a few times, but even if he usually was the talker in their relationship, Jongler had actually done the most socializing with the two, interestingly enough. He just didn’t know what to talk about, and not talking at all would be weird! Why else were they here then, if not for a chat?
But apparently that was just a thing parents did. The Pippins was sure some of them saw it as some sort of contest or challenge, some sort of event to show off how good they were as parents, and how well their kids turned out to be. At least that’s how he remembered it from his childhood, though his mother never seemed comfortable during these things either. Sometimes she’d even attempt to hide him from other’s eyes, told him to stay in his room until the guests were gone again, as if she was embarrassed of him. Well, it’s not really speculation, he knew she was. But he didn’t want to waste any more of his time and energy thinking about that.
Well, even if he didn’t like it as much, having them over once wouldn’t be the end of the world, he supposed. His spouse had been quite excited about today, so he wasn’t particularly keen on potentially ruining their mood or anything. As long as they didn’t go around snooping through their stuff he was willing to tolerate them. For a while.
And soon the three had heard a knock on their front door, the Zapper promptly inviting their guests in. Bo instantly ran in towards her unofficial “uncle Pooby”, hugging its legs. It pat her head with a smile, lifting its own daughter out of the high chair and showing her off to the other. Tetra only stared for a second, tilting her head at the new acquaintance.
When the greetings and introductions were out of the way, the weather parents and Jongler started into a natural conversation about their respective children, while said children were on the floor with the Shadowguy, playing with toys.
Battat felt a little awkward, not knowing where he’d fit in better. Pluey seemed like they had everything handled over there with the girls, so he would probably only be in the way if he tried to join them. On the other hand, he wasn’t really sure he could contribute to any conversation the three over on the couch would be having, so he’d just silently sit there like he was a kid in a stranger’s house.
Wait, that felt ridiculous to think! This was his home, he shouldn’t have to feel like that!
So he at least didn’t feel completely superfluous, or maybe to avoid looking like he didn’t want any of them here, he made a small trip to the kitchen where a plate of cookies stood, probably in preparation for their visitors. It was promptly taken and brought back to the couch, where he placed it on the nearby table.
“Did you want any snacks at all, you two?”, he forced his best smile, unfortunately quite awkward and crooked. There was a short moment of silence between the four, and the Pippins felt as if he’d just ruined their talk, wanted nothing more than to bury himself in the ground.
“Oh, yeahs! Forgot ta bring em over”, Jongler smiled with their eye, promptly taking a cookie for themselves, “thanks, Battsy.”
He flushed a little, as much as he had gotten used to hearing that nickname, hearing it be used in front of somebody else was sort of strange in a way he couldn’t really explain to himself. It was kind of like showing off they were in a relationship, but at the same time, the rings on their fingers essentially did the same thing as well, so he wasn’t sure what he was so embarrassed about.
He heard a short giggle that brought him out of his short stupor, the three seemingly back to talking about the same topic he hadn’t paid any attention to before. With not much else to do, he hesitantly sat down next to his spouse, who quickly laid their arm around his shoulders, completely unbothered by his presence. It would be strange if they suddenly were, after all.
The hours passed, many questions and stories exchanged between the two families, even if some of them were rather strange and perhaps a little inappropriate. Why would they ask who of them was the one to carry out the baby? The Pippins guessed it was kind of understandable considering they were talking to a non-traditional family, but that didn’t make them any less awkward. At least the Zapper didn’t seem to mind them too much, answered them like any regular old question, or maybe they were just that good at hiding their discomfort.
What certainly helped make things less weird from time to time were the regular interruptions by one of the two girls, either asking for something, or showing off something they had drawn or crudely colored in. Sometimes Pluey came over on all fours, carrying the kids on his back through the house, and even received some head pats whenever he passed his spouses. Battat wanted to slap himself out of shame a few times, but excused his husband’s behavior by telling himself he was just playing around with the kids, crawling around on the floor was a normal thing to do in this situation. He’d forget all about it after a minute anyway, too fond of the way him and his child played together. How were they both this adorable?
And soon their visitors had to leave for their own home once more, evening slowly approaching. The kids had become sleepy, Bo had already fallen asleep in her mom’s arms, while Tetra threatened to do the same in her dad’s lap.
Since he already held onto her, the Pippins brought her to her room, taking her cat plushie with him as well, as she wouldn’t be able to sleep without it. While he proceeded to lay her down in her bed, the Shadowguy took care of putting away the various toys still laying around in the living room, and the Zapper made themselves busy by cooking dinner.
His plan was foiled, as Tetra now held onto his clothes with an iron grip – or as much an iron grip a kid her age could muster. There was a short huff as she snuggled closer, not willing to let go of her dad any time soon. Battat sighed. Yes, she was adorable, and he didn’t want to let her go quite yet either, but she needed her sleep.
With merely a second of hesitation, he started to hum quietly, soon slipping into a soft lullaby he still remembered from a time when he regularly practiced identity theft. His voice was rather rusty, and he hadn’t trained his voice in a long time, but it didn’t seem to matter to his daughter. Her eye slowly closed with her dad’s singing and the additional swaying from side to side, slowly but surely soothing her to sleep. When her grip around him loosened, he placed one last kiss onto the top of her head, gently laying her down and tucking her in.
As he was about to leave, the sight of his shadowy husband standing in the doorway caught him off guard, a wide grin plastered over its face as it blushed lightly.
“Not a word.”