Chapter Text
No.
Had he really just said no? To the man he’d been in love with for years? No?!
Oh fuck Mina’s right, I’m a psychopath, he thinks derisively.
When he sneaks a peek at Midoriya’s face out of his peripheral, the nerd looks stricken and pale. Any other day that might have been funny but in this context it’s just awful. The green haired man’s eyes have gone wide and he’s staring at Bakugou in open surprise. Bakugou is honestly surprised that he hasn’t seen any kind of pain set in yet, right now it’s just shock.
He watches his mouth open and close several times before Midoriya finally settles on closed and then turns away. His profile is that of a defeated man and Bakugou hates himself for it. He’s the cause of this hero, his hero, looking like the world is ending and there’s nothing that can be done to save it.
“Fuucckkkk.” He drags his hands over his face after setting his food down and falls back into the comfort of the couch. He’s half-tempted to blow something up to run off some frustration but this is not the time- and everything that could be blown up has been before or it got moved specifically so he wouldn’t while he was gaming or something. Kirishima has actually been the one to suggest moving everything away from the couch after a really intense gaming session where he’d singed several pillows and blown up two good tea mugs. He’d actually been a little upset about the mugs but Kirishima had come through and replaced them.... well, he’d replaced one and after he relayed the “hilarious” story to everyone, Midoriya had actually found a replica of the other and given it to Kirishima to give to Bakugou. The stupid nerd had known it was Bakugou’s favorite mug and had taken it upon himself to fucking replace it when it was Bakugou’s own stupidity that had broken it.
A puff of sound beside him reminds him that Midoriya is beside him. He turns his head to finally get a good look at the man and wishes he hadn’t; Midoriya is smiling that weak ass smile he used to get back in high school when shit was bad and he hadn’t mastered the “it’s all right” grin yet. Bakugou feels his insides twist and he pitches forward to shove his head between his knees, instead knocking his forehead on the table and reeling backwards from the pain with a scream.
Midoriya is quick to action, leaping the space between them and landing astride Bakugou to inspect his forehead. Bakugou, romantically inept cur that he is, panics and shoves Midoriya backwards off of him. What happens next is Midoriya sitting squarely on the cream cheese pastry and spilling Bakugou’s coffee everywhere. In response to this, Bakugou can only stare with fingers pressed to his forehead and a shocked expression.
He was so fucking stupid.
Midoriya’s lower lip trembles and he makes no effort to move from his pastry-laden spot, instead those big green eyes starting to water and those perfectly freckles cheeks mottling with embarrassment. Bakugou can only stare at watch the whole fiasco unfold. What could he possibly do to salvage this? Midoriya only wanted to talk and Bakugou has instead catapulted him onto the table like some kind of freak.
The men spend several minutes staring at each other, cheeks red, before they look away and anywhere but at each other. Finally, tentatively, the blonde reaches a hang out shakily and casts a glance to Midoriya sideways. The pain on the nerd’s face is too much to look at directly and the pain in his chest at being the cause is almost too much to bear.
“ ‘m sorry I shoved you. Panicked,” he rubs the back of his neck with his free hand then looks directly at Midoriya’s heartbroken face, “Just hungover still, is all. Sudden touch is too much right now.” The realization settling over Deku’s face is like the dawn breaking and Bakugou feels himself smirk ever so slightly.
Midoriya takes the offered hand and pulls himself up, letting go almost immediately to try and assess the damage sitting on a once delicious pastry has done to his shorts. His face breaks again into disappointment and he groans. Bakugou laughs only slightly, clamming up when Midoriya shoots him a glare and raising his hands in a small surrender. “I just bought these shorts,” the green haired man laments in a voice just short of crying.
In one fluid motion Bakugou stands and gestures for Midoriya to follow him as he strides back towards his room. He only assumes he’s being followed if the startled “yes’sir” is anything to go by. He may not have any shorts that’ll fit, fucking nerd was built like a house, but a good pair of sweats or gym shorts should work.
Now that he’s showered he feels a little less like crap and can finally take stock of the situation his bedroom is in; several pairs of clothes are strewn everywhere. He can only assume in an attempt the get pajamas last night he’d thrown everything around... however that doesn’t explain the underwear on his pillow. He hadn’t noticed them this morning and he’d slept next to them. Gross.
Midoriya seems to find it all amusing though and is giggling as Bakugou scoops all the clothes up and deposits them in a hamper in the corner. “Shut up, nerd,” he growls menacingly. Midoriya only laughs more.
With an exaggerated eye roll Bakugou grabs a pair of gym shorts from a drawer and all but throws them into the other man’s chest. “Fucking change, you’re not sitting on my couch with your cream cheese ass.” At the look of barely constrained amusement from Midoriya, Bakugou let’s little explosions pop in his hands. “Change your fucking clothes or I’ll change them for you, nerd.”
This seems to work in getting Midoriya to take him seriously and he watches him scramble towards the bathroom to change shorts. Idiot.
When it seems to be taking a longer time than anticipated, Bakugou raps his knuckles on the door and calls out, “You need me to come in there, Deku? It’s just a pair of shorts, I can’t imagine you’re having issues with such a simple thing.”
The sound of things clattering to the floor is his answer and he doesn’t wait before slamming the door open to be greater with an unexpected sight; Midoriya is sitting on the counter in his underwear with various bathroom products scattered about him. His own shorts are on the floor and the loaned gym shorts are clutched in his hands.
Bakugou can’t be held responsible for his next actions, any reasonable person would have done the same. Or so he tells himself afterwards.
The next few minutes seem to pass in a blur of consciousness for the blonde. He vaults over the cargo shorts on the floor to scoop Midoriya into his arms, despite the man’s protestations, and carries him out of the bathroom. Midoriya is flailing and stuttering the entire time, right up until Bakugou dumps him on the bed on his ass and starts wrestling the shorts from his grip. In his panic at being caught Midoriya’s fingers have tightened on the shorts and he flat out refuses to loosen his grip. The litany of “Kacchan what are you doing” and “Kacchan, what the hell” is incessant and only stops when Midoriya finally relinquishes the shorts because Bakugou is all but crawling on top of him. Bakugou lets out a triumphant “Ha! Damn right, nerd” and waves the shorts in the air before he jumps off and turns to face the red-faced man sitting on his bed. In the back of his mind all he can focus on is Midoriya shyly sitting on his bed, scarred fingers clutching the wrinkled blanket and cheeks a crimson they rivaled Kirishima’s hair. How has Bakugou never noticed how well shaped Midoriya’s legs are? They’re all muscle and it’s a surprise he’s not salivating. He’s always been a sucker for a nice pair of legs and fuck does Izuku have a gorgeous pair. He can just imagine grabbing a hold of them and feeling those muscles under his fingers...even his teeth and lips.
But there was a bigger problem to address and he needed to get ahold of himself; no shorts.
So Bakugou drops to his knees and before Midoriya can process what’s happening Bakugou is sliding the shorts over his legs and pushing him backwards into the bed to finish pulling them up. When he seems to finally register what’s going on Midoriya panics and flails our, clocking Bakugou right in the side of the head with a, thankfully unpowered, fist.
This is what finally knocks Bakugou to his senses. Well, that and the sudden blossoming need to puke. He falls backwards onto his ass, straight on the floor, and stares as Midoriya sits up in all his flushed glory.
“Ka-Kacchan?”
Bakugou stays stock still with wide eyes. He’s barely even registered he was punched, his brain is now deciding to play back with frustrating high definition what he had just done.
Midoriya is suddenly kneeling in front of him, shorts in place. (When had he done that?) One Of those scarred hands reaches out slowly, presumably to cup his face if the hand gesture is any indication. “Kacchan? I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to hit you! Let me check and see if you’re okay.” His fingers barely make contact when Bakugou ruins everything again.
“Oh fuck.”
There’s the vomit. Finally. He all but shoves Midoriya into the bed and scrabbles like a deranged crab towards the bathroom. He slips briefly on the discarded shorts and curses their existence before making it to the toilet to dry heave the barely existent contents of his stomach into the bowl.
Agony.
Red blossoms behind his closed eyelids like droplets of blood. He hopes faintly it’s not blood, even though blood would make no sense.
How the fuck do people enjoy drinking if this is what it’s like? Holy shit this is truly awful! Does Mina have to do this every time she drinks? That’s gotta he really unattractive to any guy she brings home. And what about Kirishima? Ugh. No way shark-teeth would ever get a kiss if this was what happened when he went out! Gross! Who honestly thought drinking was fun if this happened! Maybe Pinky was right this morning and there was a problem. This kind of drinking had to stop, can’t always drink away your stress-
“You’ve thought about kissing Kirishima?”
Of course! Who hasn’t thought about kissing Kirishima? What with those weird teeth and those big dumb adorable eyes and he pouts really cute.
“I mean, I guess Kirishima is kind of cute. You guys would be really cute together.”
Gross, no. Kirishima isn’t his type.
“You just said he was cute.”
“I definitely did not.”
A gentle hand lands on his shoulder and jolts him back into his body. He turns to find a pair of soft, worried green eyes staring at him. The smile on his lips doesn’t quite meet his eyes and Bakugou is confused. “You definitely did, Kacchan. You were mumbling between trying to...puke.” He lets out a sad little laugh.
Bakugou screws his eyes shut and melts backwards into the warm body behind him. “I did no such thing, nerd. You can’t prove shit.”
This gets a genuine giggle from Midoriya and it goes a little towards easing him. “I’m really sorry for punching you, Kacchan. I think I may have hit you too hard and you’re in love with Kirishima now.”
Bakugou mimes vomiting and is promptly dropped onto his back so his recliner can avoid being puked on. “Not in love with Kirishima,” he mumbles from his spot on the floor, eyes still shut against the bright lights in his bathroom, “never Kirishima. Don’t like red heads. His legs are too bulky anyways.”
“I think you’re still drunk.”
Bakugou slaps away the hands trying to lift him by his armpits. “Hungover as fuck. Who let me drink this much last night?” The question is mostly rhetoric... mostly. He does kind of want to know why Kirishima didn’t knock his ass out.
The hands are more insistent this time and he’s hauled to his feet rather reluctantly and only after complaining that the floor was colder. With help he half walks to the bed and flops down onto his back, reminiscent of awful his awakening this morning. Midoriya plunks down on the other side of the bed and keeps quiet. Bakugou cracks his eyes open to see what the nerd is on about and sees him just staring with a small smile. “What, asshole?”
“You’re kind of funny when you’re hungover.” He shrugs and then toys with the hem of his shirt. “You’re a dick when you drink but you’re funny when you’re hungover. I wish you wouldn’t drink so much though,” he whispers the last words as he looks up to meet Bakugou’s red gaze.
Unable to stand the guilt Bakugou looks away. “Tch. Not drinking this much ever again.” He swivels his head back, slowly, to peg Midoriya with a hard stare. “And I’m not a dick when I drink.”
“You actually kind of are?”
“Why would you think that?”
Midoriya lets out a huff of breath and shuts his eyes tightly, like he’s bracing for some huge impact or to get screamed at. Which, depending on what he said, the latter might happen, hangover be damned.
“You yelled at me a lot last night. And you tried to fight me.” He opens his eyes to see Bakugou’s placidly watching him, waiting. When the blonde nods for him to continue Midoriya answers with his own small nod. “We haven’t fought since we were kids, Kacchan. You were really mean last night. I only wanted to help.”
“Spit it out, nerd. What did I do? PinkyPie said I fucked up.” Midoriya nods again and Bakugou growls. Of course he’d fucked up. “Something about love confessions.”
Midoriya’s wince is all the confirmation he needs. “You got really mad at me. I wanted to apologize. I know you don’t feel that way about me and I shouldn’t have brought it up, especially when you were drinking and not in the best state of mind. It was clear all night you didn’t want to be around me but I pushed, and I’m sorry. I kept following you like we were kids again.”
Both men laugh at this. “Not mad about the confession.” He looks back over to see Midoriya staring at his lap so he reaches out and slaps the back of his fingers against the nerd’s knee. “Hey, look at me.” Midoriya grants the request and looks up under his lashes. “Fuck do you even know how stupidly attractive you are when you do that? Fucking quit” he growls as he slaps his hand harder against his knee.
“Ow! That really hurts!”
“No it doesn’t, asshole.”
“You’re being so mean, Kacchan. You must be feeling better if you’re being this mean.” Despite his words there’s a small smile tugging at Midoriya’s lips and Bakugou sighs at the sight. The nerd really was cute. “You aren’t mad that I confessed?”
“Seriously that’s what you fucking took from that? God you’re dense as fuck.” He rolls over onto his stomach and scoops Midoriya down to him with an arm around the man’s waist. The squeak he gets from it is adorable, like a fucking excited puppy. Midoriya uncharacteristically stays in Bakugou’s grip, but stays tense under the arm. Taking this as a good sign Bakugou continues. “I’m not mad about the confession, dipshit. I’m mad at the how. And I called you attractive and you completely skipped over it in favor of hearing I wasn’t mad about your shitty ass love confession.”
“It’s not nice to say someone’s love confession is shitty!”
Bakugou pushes him away and rolls to sit up with a half-hearted glare. “Well it was. That is honestly the worst way to confess! How do you expect someone to reciprocate if you think telling them you love them in a back alley is okay?”
“How would you do it, then? It wasn’t exactly planned! Not like it matters, you said no twice now and you’re being really scarily calm about it.” Midoriya doesn’t seem offended or scared anymore, but he’s not entirely at ease in Bakugou’s presence.
Bakugou shoots him a smirk, eyes twinkling with mischief despite their tiredness. “Nah, I ain’t gonna tell ya. You don’t deserve to know. You’re not smooth enough to pull it off anyways.”
The pillow that hits the back of his head is unexpected and he turns startled eyes to Midoriya who still had the pillow clutched in his hands and an enthusiastic smile on his perfectly kissable lips. “You’re a bully, Katsuki.”
Bakugou Rios the pillow from his hands and throws it back at his face with a laugh. “Damn straight, idiot. Now let’s go back to our coffee, my mouth tastes like shit.”
“Good thing I’m not allowed to kiss you, I’d hate to taste that.”
The unexpected words cause Bakugou to stutter-step as he’s climbing off the bed and he almost faceplants.
“HAAAAA?”
Midoriya tosses him a sly smirk on his way past into the main area. “Kirishima probably wouldn’t mind though.”
Bakugou watches the nerd walk, no- fucking sashay, back to the couch without moving. That cheeky little shithead...he’s actually kind of more in love with him for it. “Oh you’re so in for it, Izuku Midoriya. I’ll show you who wouldn’t mind it” he mutters to himself as he moves to rejoin him on the couch and resume the free, and probably cold by now, coffee.
The next few months pass by too fast for Bakugou’s liking. He’s so occupied on trying to dial back his drinking that he doesn’t even notice the city getting colder. All in all, he’s done really well. He hates to lose, after all, and this is just another type of competition. He’s managed to get it down to drinking once a week, and he’s made a deal with himself that he won’t even do that if someone comes over. He’s trying to be better. The BakuSquad has started randomly showing up on his time off if it coincides with theirs, and it’s kept him alcohol-free for quite a few nights. It doesn’t always work but it helps.
Mina attributes the ‘easiness’ of his quitting from him not really being addicted, but Kirishima seems proud of him all the same. And Bakugou can’t stand making that idiot sad so he keeps trying. When he proudly proclaimed to Kirishima one night that despite having the day off and no one coming over he hadn’t drank, Kirishima had kissed him. And Bakugou hasn’t really minded, but they both knew it wasn’t right. So Bakugou had tactlessly said the teeth weren’t as bad as he imagined and dove in for one more kiss. The night ended with both men deciding they wouldn’t work out, and Kirishima trying to psyche Bakugou up to confess to Midoriya. Bakugou’s response had been to tell him he’d only do that when Kirishima stopped crushing on him. That was how he found out Kirishima had been thinking about asking out someone he worked out with, and he couldn’t have been happier for his friend. But of course he wouldn’t tell him that, so it was a shoulder bump and an “About fucking time, shitty hair.”
And so the months passed in more or less the same fashion. He kept busy at work and if he was stressed too much he called Ashido. He took her up on the offer of listening if it was needed. And more than once she stuck her pink fucking nose in his business and asked how it was going with Midoriya. Every time he shot her down and told her to shut the fuck up if she knew what was good for her. Turns out she did, in fact, know what was good for her after the tenth threat to her life.
Speaking of the nerd, he learned to ease up...some. He wouldn’t fully ease up until he confessed himself and got a yes. On the chance Midoriya turned him down, he didn’t want to admit to being a lovesick fool. It was easier to pretend nothing existed than to be a mopey imbecile. He could be normal angry Bakugou if it didn’t work out and no one would be any the wiser.
But it was time to finally admit he needed to do something about this. His time with Midoriya was getting harder to stand. There was only so many times he could shrug off a touch that lasted a bit too long or a stare that lingered. He had a suspicion Midoriya was catching on but Kirishima assured him that the nerd still firmly believed Bakugou was not interested and was just behaving weirdly because he wasn’t drinking as much.
Idiot.
When snow finally came to visit their city he couldn’t put it off anymore. The time to tell Midoriya was now or he risked losing him forever. He couldn’t stand seeing the man’s face in magazines with the words “hottest bachelor” stamped across the pages. Those dweebs didn’t even know Deku, not like Bakugou did. And he’d fucking show them. Deku wasn’t a bachelor, oh no. He just didn’t know he belonged to Bakugou...yet. But that was going to change. Tonight.
Midoriya usually got home around 8pm if his texts from the last week were anything to go by. It was 7 now, which gave him an hour to get flowers and candy and half an hour to obsessively rehearse his speech. Half past 8 seemed a good enough time to show up, it gave Midoriya enough time to settle in from work. Fuck he hoped the nerd wasn’t in the shower when he showed up. No, scratch that, he could be in the shower but only if he invited Bakugou to join him and-
“Fuuuccckkkk.”
He bangs his head on the metal pole beside him on the train. He was getting so off topic thinking about a naked and wet Deku. Mentally he shakes himself and chastises that he needs to get back on task, stay focused.
The flowers were easy, he could grab some of those funky colored carnations he saw online. People dyed them all kinds of crazy colors and he had a feeling Midoriya would like them. Orange and green, that’s what he wanted. He would mimic their hero suits and make the damn nerd swoon from his attention to detail. Deku was always into sappy shit like that.
The candy, well... that one might be harder. Deku loved chocolates but there was one brand that he had once threatened to dismember Bakugou over if he ate them all. It stuck in his head only because he couldn’t remember the little jackass ever threatening to rip his arms off before. Ochako has laughed like it was the funniest thing she’d ever heard and when Bakugou aimed a rather large explosion her way Midoriya had chucked him across the street like he was a rag doll. Needless to say, he was never forgetting that fucking candy.
8pm on the dot his phone vibrates with a message from Deku.
DEKU: just got home. Have a good night! Let me know if you need to talk and I can come over or call
Bakugou huffs out a small laugh at how predictable his little nerd is. No, not his yet. But tonight he will be. This thought makes him smile as he finally strides into the complex Deku lives in. Okay, so half an hour to stand out here like a creep and practice what he wants to say. He could totally do this.
“Deku- no, shit. Can’t call him that for this. Gotta do this right!” He slaps his cheeks with a growl and mentally starts over. Just then his phone buzzes again and he sees messages roll in from the group chat.
RIOT: good luck tonight!
Zappy-Boy: you got this, man!
SeroIsBadAtNames: go get em!
AlienQueen: don’t do anything I wouldn’t do, sweetie <3
Of course Ashido would be weird. He types out a response with a smile.
Blasty: you do everything, and everyone
AlienQueen: how rude
AlienQueen: but seriously, good luck Katsuki
Blasty: thanks, idiots
Blasty: if I don’t respond...idk. It could have gone either way
RIOT: he loves you, shut up. You got this!
Of course Kirishima was super excited about this. That man had become his number one supporter since they’re little rendezvous.
He silenced the device and slides it into his pocket. No more distractions. He starts psyching himself up again.
“Izuku. I know we haven’t always gotten along-“
“You’re right, we haven’t.”
A shock jolts up Bakugou’s spine at the voice. That voice. Slowly he turns his head and gets an eyeful of Deku bashfully standing at the base of the stairs, rubbing the back of his neck.
“Deku, you damn nerd! I’ll kill you!” Honestly who could blame him? The nerd had snuck up on him! “Who do you think you are, sneaking up on me?”
Deku giggles and Bakugou feels his heart soar at the sound. He would kill to hear that for the rest of his life. “I didn’t think it was sneaking, Kacchan. You’re standing in my parking lot like a creep.” At Bakugou’s scowl he offers a huge grin. Then, noticing Bakugou trying to hide things on the ground, he tries peeking around. “Whatcha hiding?”
“N-nothing! Back off,” he shouts. He can feel the sparks in his hands and quickly closes them to smother any explosions.
His stutter and evasiveness only seems to pique Midoriya’s interest and he skips, actually skips, the distance between them to stand almost nose to nose with his visitor. “You’re hiding something, Kat-su-ki.” He pops each syllable of his name and smirks at seeing the blush rise on Bakugou’s neck.
Bakugou pushes at Midoriya’s chest to no avail and the green haired man just laughs. “I’m glad you came to see me. Why don’t you come on up and ai’ll order us a pizza.” Without waiting for an answer Midoriya spins on a heel and starts off back towards his apartment. When he reaches the stairs and Bakugou still hasn’t joined him he calls back, “I’ll go up first and leave you to gather whatever you’re hiding. I’m assuming it’s for me if you were hiding it from me,” he grins, “That’s cute.”
Oh there was no way the nerd didn’t know Bakugou was in love with him.
Quickly he scoops up the gifts and darts off after Midoriya. The apartment’s front room is as he remembers it; sparse living room decorated in blues and yellows and reds. Still obsessed with All Might. He laughs a little and looks over to see Midoriya putzing around the kitchen, presumably looking for a pizza menu. “Usual for me, you know what I like” he calls out. Midoriya nods without looking back and dances a little when he finally finds the menu. Adorable idiot.
Figuring this is his best chance Bakugou deposits the gifts on the small table. Midoriya would see them, sure, but maybe he could knock this out before food was delivered. He didn’t have a speech yet but he could do this, he’d wing it. He can hear the call ending in the kitchen so he prepares himself, standing beside the table so everything was in view.
Midoriya’s face as he turns the corner and sees the display sours Bakugou’s mood instantly, however. Instead of awed, the nerd looks confused and keeps glancing between the gifts and Bakugou like he’s not sure who anyone is or what flowers are. Maybe he should have been holding the flowers? Shit. Quickly he picks them up and crosses the room to stand before the other man. Midoriya looks slightly taken aback and backs up, Bakugou trailing him until he’s flush against a wall with the blonde looming over him. “Kacchan? What’s going on?”
Bakugou groans and rolls his eyes and shoves the flowers against his chest. “I had this all planned out, shitty Deku. Of course you’d ruin it.” He waist until Deku accepts the colorful carnations then stuffs his hands in his pockets. “They’re for you. The chocolates too. They’re the ones you like so much.”
Midoriya peers around Bakugou with wide eyes. When he alights in the chocolates he darts past the blonde to get to the table. Immediately he drops to his knees and touches the box reverently, acting like he’s not sure it’s real. A little hurt at being abandoned over candy, Bakugou turns to give him an earful but one look at those tear filled eyes has him swallowing his words. Midoriya looks so happy.
“Kacchan. You got all this for me” he chokes it, words caught between sobs.
Bakugou nods and sits beside the other man on the floor. He needed to do this now before they got derailed or Midoriya got the wrong idea.
“Why would you get me these things? I mean, it’s really nice of you but you’ve never done this befo-“ Bakugou places his palm over Midoriya’s babbling mouth, effectively cutting him off, smiling at the wide eyes and the red growing on the other man’s face.
“Let me say what I need to say, and then I’ll let you babble away for the rest of the night. Nod if you understand.” Midoriya nods eagerly behind Bakugou’s hand and he grins. “Good boy.” Midoriya blushes even more at the praise, so Bakugou files the knowledge away for later.
He clears his throat and grabs one of Midoriya’s scarred hands in his own. The shock from the other man almost has them pulling apart but Bakugou holds on tighter. “Izuku, I know we haven’t always gotten along. We grew up together and I made your life a living hell. I thrived on it, even. But I watched you grow with jealousy. I think that was why I was so hard on you. Even quirkless you were a better hero than I could be. And then you got a quirk and suddenly I couldn’t keep up. But when we graduated, I watched you rise through the ranks with fondness. Before that, even, I think the jealousy faded away to an acceptance. I was even proud. You were going to be so much better than me, and I had a new goal to strive towards. But I-,” he swallows past the lump of coal burning in his throat, “I didn’t know how to tell you I didn’t hate you anymore. You kept being nice and I didn’t deserve it. I think I was punishing myself on your behalf. I thought I didn’t have a right to your kindness. So I kept pushing away. But the further I got the more I hurt. It hurt to be in your orbit, too, but for a different reason.” He threads the fingers of their joined hands together and squeezes lightly. Midoriya looks like he wants to cry and Bakugou’s not far behind. “It took awhile to realize, but it hurt to be in your orbit because I love you and I didn’t think I deserved that. I was awful to you, I didn’t deserve to love someone as pure as you. But, that didn’t stop the feelings from being there. And, well, I finally realized I can’t keep putting it off. The options were speak up or step aside, and I don’t like backing down. I think you know that better than anyone.” Midoriya is actually crying now and Bakugou reaches out with his untethered hand to wipe a few tears away. “So, Izuku Midoriya, I love you. I’ve loved you for years. And I felt you had the right to know.”
Silence stretches between them, punctuated only by their heavy breathing. It gets tense before Midoriya breaks it, mercifully. “You told me no, Kacchan.”
He doesn’t want to admit that this breaks his heart. He knows how Midoriya felt now at hearing those words. It’s a soul crushing feeling. He starts disentangling their fingers so he can make a quick escape. “Yeah, I guess I did. I wasn’t happy with you confessing first and in a shitty back alley and in that situation, so I said no. Like the fucking psychopath I am.” He climbs to his feet and double checks he’s still got his phone and everything else on him; check, all there. “I understand that I did irreparable damage. But, I thought you should know. And this was kind of how I planned on confessing for awhile now. You asked how I would have done it? This. This is how I would have done it.” He laughs suddenly, tears now spilling down his cheeks. This is an unfamiliar feeling and he hates it. The only other time he’d felt like this was watching All Might retire. “Just maybe without the rejection. But don’t worry about it, s’all good. We go back to normal now. You can keep the flowers and chocolates, I’m not that much of a dick.”
He takes a few steps backwards, trying to etch this last look of Deku in his brain, and then turns to leave. He gets another two steps before a green blur tackles him to the side and they go skidding across the floor and into a wall. Logically he knows it’s Deku but his training kicks in and he pops an explosion against the wall to stop himself from hitting it hard.
“DEKU WHAT THE FUCK I COULD HAVE KILLED YOU!”
The nerd’s face is buried against his chest and he’s heaving great sobs and soaking Bakugou’s shirt through. “Oi, nerd. What the fuck?” He grabs a fistful of Midoriya’s hair and yanks, pulling the blubbering man’s face up to see what was going on.
Midoriya looks a right mess but he’s smiling as big as All Might and Bakugou is so confused. Hadn’t he just rejected him? Why was he smiling.
“Deku what the fuck?”
Midoriya laughs suddenly through the tears and unwraps his arms to wipe the tears from Bakugou’s face. “You’re so dumb, Kacchan. You never listen to me.”
“Hey, shitty nerd. I just poured my heart out and now you’re being rude?”
“No!” Midoriya sits up suddenly astride Bakugou’s hips. “Listen to me, Kacchan. Just listen.” He plants his hands firmly on Bakugou’s chest like he plans on keeping him in place forcefully if necessary. “You told me no. But then we talked, and you said I was attractive. And you said you weren’t mad. So I thought, maybe there was hope? And I’ve been trying to give you space! But Kirishima said you had big plans!”
“Hair for brains is getting his ass kicked for this.”
“Don’t interrupt me, Katsuki! You have no manners! But I was giving you space to get used to me loving you, and to see what you’d do. But you had told me no, and that crushed me. But I didn’t stop loving you, you big idiot.”
“Watch your mouth. You’re hanging out with me too much if you’re getting this mouthy.”
A devilish smirk crosses Midoriya’s face and it’s so at odds with his tear stained face that Bakugou has to laugh, but it ends when Midoriya brings his face level with the blonde’s underneath him. “You can watch it for me. I’ve seen you doing it, Kacchan. You think you’re subtle but you’re not.”
He plants a palm in Midoriya’s face and pushes, shoving distance between them. “Says the man I caught checking my hungover ass out. You’re one to talk, Izuku.”
“Say it again.”
Bakugou shoots him a glare. “Getting a little demanding. Wanna say please? And elaborate?”
“Say it again. My name.”
Bakugou is admittedly taken aback but does as asked. “Izuku.”
Midoriya’s smile is blissful. “Again” he pleads.
Bakugou smirks and closes the distance between them, sliding his knees between Midoriya’s. “Izuku,” he whispers, bringing their faces closer. “Is this what you wanted, Izuku? You wanted me to beg for your love?”
Midoriya shakes his head but his face tells a different story; he looks completely enraptured. “I never want to make you beg. Unless that’s what you like, then I guess we can-“
Mood gone.
Bakugou covers his mouth again and narrows his eyes. “Stop talking. You ruin things. And who said there’s a we?”
“Mwycanbugthooifthasswatyouslike.”
Peeling his hand away he wipes it on his jeans with an overly disgusted face. “What the fuck did you just slobber all over my hand to say?”
“I said, I can beg too if that’s what you like.”
“Jesus Deku you can’t just say shit like that. How are you so nonchalant about that?”
“I mean, I can’t say I haven’t pictured it. I’ve had a lot of time to come up with fantasies and I guess since we’re confessing to things tonight and we feel the same there’s no point denying it.”
“Deku, I’m going to kiss you but I need you to shut the ever loving fuck up. Your lips are doing completely the wrong kind of movement and I physically can not take any more of your inane blabbering.”
“So mean, Kacchan!”
Bakugou grabs a fistful of Midoriya’s shirt and hauls him forward, clashing their lips together in the worst first kiss imaginable. Even kissing Kirishima wasn’t this awkward.
Midoriya looks blissed out though when they pull apart and Bakugou pushes him away again. “You need practice. You’re gross.”
Midoriya just nods and stumbles to his feet, pulling Bakugou up with him. “Yeah. Okay, we can practice. You’ll teach me. I’ll learn your moves again.”
“Nerd.”
“Your nerd.”
At this, Bakugou can’t help but smile. Yeah, certainly his nerd. For as long as the little idiot would have him. “Yeah Deku, my nerd.” A knock on the door interrupts them and Bakugou groans. Fucking pizza man. He spins Deku and plants a boot in his ass to push him towards the door. “If I open the door with a hard on I will have to blow up the delivery boy. Get the pizza so we can eat and I can ravish you.”
The look of delighted terror on Midoriya’s face is enough to feed Bakugou’s sadistic ego for years to come.
Hours later, as they lay on Midoriya’s floor after eating too much pizza and making out for far longer than decent, Bakugou reflects on what brought them here. What brought him to this happy place that he never thought he deserved.
His plan hadn’t worked like he’d wanted it to, but he had Midoriya now. It worked out. And he would work every day to keep that smile on his nerd’s face. And for him, he’d stop drinking altogether. He never wanted to forget Midoriya confessing his love ever again.
And if he had it his way, they’d be confessing their love every day until they were nothing but dust.