Chapter Text
The world is full of strange behavior
Every man has to be his own savior
I know I can make it on my own if I try
But I'm searchin' for a great heart to stand me by
Patton insisted on making decaf for a whole week after Janus was able to return to his normal activities, not wanting to interfere with his ability to sleep.
Janus pretended to mind the fussing, pretended his heart didn't skip several beats whenever Patton smiled at him.
They played cards with the others and watched movies, even spent time with Remus. Roman was cordial, but he spent a lot of his time off with Virgil.
Patton and Janus stayed up late one night, later than the others despite Logan's pointed reminder that Janus still needed plenty of rest.
"Good thing I made decaf, huh?" Patton said, taking a pitcher out of the fridge. He poured black coffee over ice and added milk, then a liberal amount of whipped cream before passing the now-familiar ouroboros mug over to Janus.
Virgil had faithfully relayed Janus' coffee preferences, and Patton hadn't missed a single detail. Not that 'iced coffee with whole milk and whipped cream' was all that complicated, but Janus wouldn't have put it beyond Virgil to get it wrong just to mess with him.
Janus hummed an affirmative, only-half listening. Nerves left his mouth dry and his heart thumping in his chest, and for a few terrible moments he was worried he might faint again and ruin everything.
"This is really nice, Janus," Patton said. "I like spending time with you."
Janus couldn't help the pang of loss that went through his chest now that Patton was exclusively referring to him by name again. "It is."
"Oh, I meant to ask you." Patton paused, perhaps noticing the look on Janus' face. "Do you really like it when I call you 'honey'? You were pretty out of it when you told me, so I wasn't sure if you meant it."
Janus suppressed the instinct to hide his blush under a mask of his own face. If he was going to do this, he had to do it right. No lying. No hiding. "I, ah…" He looked at Patton, but Patton wasn't looking back. He had his face turned to the countertop, staring at the milk jug. "Patton."
"It's okay if the answer is no!" Patton's cheery tone did not match his posture, the hang of his head.
"Is it okay if the answer is yes?" Janus ventured.
Patton spun around so suddenly he nearly lost his balance. "Really? You don't think it's patronizing?"
Janus swallowed. "I think it's sweet," he forced himself to say. He was allowed no layers but his clothing tonight. No sarcasm. No doublespeak.
"Um, Janus?"
"Patton."
When had they gotten so close together? Janus remembered, suddenly, the feeling of Patton's hand on his cheek and their fingers tangled together. Janus glanced down at Patton's hand. Should he…? Was he allowed ?
Patton said breathlessly, "There's something I want to do, but you're not really supposed to do it without talking about it first."
They were nearly nose-to-nose now. Janus took Patton's hands in his own. "People have told me I talk too much."
Patton kissed him, and there was nothing chaste or saccharine about it. With both their hands pinned between them and Janus staggering backward under Patton's weight, they would have lost their balance had Janus' back not hit the counter. Patton kissed hard.
He pulled back a few seconds later, his glasses foggy where they'd touched Janus' skin. "Should I have asked first?"
Janus kissed him, and sparks of happiness ignited in his chest.
Everything that had happened and everything he had done, it had all been worth it. It had all led to this.