Chapter Text
“Is this really necessary?” Mickey groaned as he sat down besides Ian, gently pushing against his boyfriend’s body in protest. Ian was mouthing his introduction to the video that him and Mickey were about to film together in Ian’s living room.
“Yeah it is,” Ian smiled as he quickly read through the questions again before looking up towards the camera.
IAN:
Hey, guys, it’s Ian Gallagher and I’ve been requested to do this tag ever since my coming out video, which still is my most popular video so thank you all for the loving support. So I guess without further ado-
“What am I supposed to do?” Mickey whispered to Ian, interrupting his introduction.
Ian sighed, pressed a button on the small remote he had on the coffee table and turned to Mickey.
“I don’t know, look adorable?” Ian laughed, “don’t worry about it.” Ian prepared to be pushed away from his boyfriend for calling him adorable, but he noticed that Mickey looked very uncomfortable, his eyebrows were tense and he wasn’t looking Ian in the face. “What’s wrong?”
“I just,” Mickey began in a small voice, “have never been in front of a camera before.”
A soft ‘oh’ escaped Ian’s lips.
Mickey turned away from Ian now continuing, “It was never a thing in our family, taking photographs, or videos, only Mand’s has been in front of it in my videos.”
Ian didn’t know how to respond. He never knew how to respond when he heard things from Mickey’s childhood that just broke Ian’s heart, and this was one of those times.
“I just, I don’t know…” Mickey kept talking trying to fill the sudden awkward moment, “I mean, I could –“
“Do what I do,” Ian explained, “fake it till you make it. My psychiatrist said something along those lines years ago when I was first diagnosed and its stuck with me in everything I do. Just act like yourself, confidently,” Ian smiled when Mickey finally met his glance, “just answer the questions in true Milkovich style, and we have a hit on our hands,” Mickey was looking relaxed now, “Oh, and don’t look into the viewfinder.”
“Viewfinder?” Mickey’s eyebrows creased again.
“The little side screen.” Mickey looked and nodded, looking more assured now so Ian, now satisfied, began the recording again.
IAN
Hey, it’s me, Ian Gallagher, and I have been requested to do this tag ever since my coming out video, which is still my most popular video, so thanks for all the love and support. But without further ado, the boyfriend tag, with my super awesome boyfriend Mickey Milkovich.
MICKEY
Hi, and thanks for not calling me adorable, or any of your other annoying nicknames.
IAN
We still have the whole video to go, darling.
MICKEY
(Groans)
IAN
(laughing) Okay so the rules, I’m gonna ask you these questions and if you get them right, you can have a small snickers bar, and if you lose, I get to eat the chocolate. You need to get 20 out of 25 –
MICKEY
What?! Dude, that’s more than half!
IAN
I know, I have a lot of faith in you, and I really want the chocolate bar.
MICKEY
But….
IAN
No buts, now first question, where did we meet?
MICKEY
Oh, that’s easy school
IAN
Is that your answer?
MICKEY
(Uncertainly) Yeah…
IAN
(Gleefully) You’re wrong!
MICKEY
What??
IAN
We first met at little league, I was in your team
MICKEY
No you weren’t that’s a lie
IAN
I knew you wouldn’t believe me so I have proof. I asked Fiona to send me old photos of OUR team and you can see me quite distinctly.
MICKEY
(Looking at the photo on Ian’s phone) What?
IAN
You’re saying that a lot (laughing, shows the camera the photo) so you can see Mickey in the back row at the end there, and I’m in the front row with my crazy hair. So one to me. Next question: what was our first date?
MICKEY
What do you think is a date?
IAN
(Shrugs with a knowing smile)
MICKEY
(Whispers) asshole. (Normally) Okay fine I have two answers. Either that time we were out with my sister which sounds stupid, or the first night I came here to LA.
IAN
And what did we do that first night here?
MICKEY
We went out for dinner somewhere.
IAN
And…?
MICKEY
Dude, I’m not talking about that on the internet!
IAN
(Laughing) okay well you got that right, congrats. Next one: where was our first kiss? And how was it?
MICKEY
After that dinner with my sister and we walked around Chicago talking some shit and then you just kissed me.
IAN
(Sly smile) and then…?
MICKEY
Not talking about it on camera (blushing)
IAN
(laughs again) Okay two points. Next question: did you know I was the one?
MICKEY
I don’t even remember you being in my little league team of course not. Well, not until this year I guess.
IAN
(Surprised) wait, really?
MICKEY
(blushing) yeah I guess so, why, did you?
IAN
I knew when I first saw your YouTube videos that you were special, but when I met you again after all those years, I knew. But before that you were just Mandy, my best friend’s brother.
MICKEY
Yeah that’s the same here.
IAN
Okay, enough mush, you got that correct, not that I know how to figure if that’s correct or not, but three points for you Mick, next question: first impression?
MICKEY
Seriously I could say anything and you wouldn’t know if I’m correct or not. This is fucking stupid.
IAN
Okay fine, new rules. If I like the answer you get the point.
MICKEY
That’s even stupider.
IAN
Don’t hate me, I don’t make the rules.
MICKEY
You are an actual idiot. Fine first impression from when I ACTUALLY remember you being in my life. I thought that you were really cool. Not many people liked Mandy or were friends with her, but you were really nice to her and got your older brother to mess with boys who hurt her and I just thought you were really cool.
IAN
Aww you think I’m cool (nudges Mickey gently)
MICKEY
What was yours?
IAN
Well I heard from your sister that you were lame, so I didn’t really think about you until I got older and I saw how tough you were and how much you cared about your family and I admired it. But enough about me, you got that correct as well. Next question: when did you meet the family?
MICKEY
Wait, was your mum the blonde who was only at the baseball games when she was pregnant?
IAN
Yeah, I guess that was Monica
MICKEY
Fuck she was crazy, I always thought that she was just always pregnant and didn’t actually give birth, she was never around not knocked up. But I guess I met them pretty early on, we live like 3 street away from each other.
IAN
What about as my boyfriend?
MICKEY
Oh fuck well I became your boyfriend and then you fucking took off back here while I was stuck in Chicago being interrogated by your family about you and us, we had literally been together a whole 24 hours before the first phone call from Fiona came through.
IAN
(Laughing) Okay that’s another point then. Do we have any traditions?
MICKEY
Probably none that we can talk about on YouTube…
IAN
PG ones
MICKEY
Well we watch a lot of shows together, like we watch series of shows together all the time
IAN
That’s what I was looking for, correct, next one: first road trip?
MICKEY
Never had one, we don’t own fucking cars
IAN
Okay first trip together?
MICKEY
Uh me moving in here, we both flew from Chicago here I guess?
IAN
Correct once again, you are going well, next one: who said I love you first and where were we?
MICKEY
(mumbles)
IAN
Sorry, what was that?
MICKEY
I did, you dick, and we were here on this couch.
IAN
And what were we doing?
MICKEY
PG rating dude.
IAN
(Laughing) okay fair enough my loving boyfriend who said he loved me first because he is a big sappy teddy bear – ow.
MICKEY
You deserved that punch.
IAN
Fine, what do we argue about most then?
MICKEY
Uh, do we argue?
IAN
Only when I have to tell you not to do something stupid like hit someone because someone looked at you funny.
MICKEY
They fucking deserve it!
IAN
Okay, okay, he is kidding, his fine, but next question: who wears the pants in the relationship?
MICKEY
We’re both wearing pants, so both of us, what a stupid question.
IAN
(Laughing) fair enough. Okay, if I’m sitting in front of the tv what am I watching?
MICKEY
Probably a movie cuz you wanna do that shit, like an action movie or something.
IAN
Correct, we watch tv shows together, but when his at work I watch movies by my lonesome. Okay: what dressing do I get on my salad?
MICKEY
You’re one of those weirdos who eats vegetables without flavouring cuz you’re fucking weird.
IAN
True, but we just never had dressing at home so I assumed that it was normal to not have dressing. What’s one food I don’t like?
MICKEY
Dude, you fucking eat everything there is nothing you don’t like
IAN
That is also true, okay: we go out to eat what do I get to drink?
MICKEY
I don’t know, it’s usually some stupid expensive beer that sounds foreign
IAN
Correct, I won’t bother with details because we don’t go out that much. What shoe size do I wear?
MICKEY
What the fuck? Why would I fucking know that?
IAN
This video is literally going to be just one big bleep. And you should, you’re my boyfriend.
MICKEY
Well I don’t, but I’m still a great fuck right?
IAN
PG Mick, if I was collecting anything what would it be?
MICKEY
Easy, movies
IAN
Movies?
MICKEY
Yeah you are always watching movies and we have so many you are definitely collecting them
IAN
I had never thought about that, okay well done Mickey: what is my favourite type of sandwich?
MICKEY
People are actually interested in these fucking questions? Who wants to watch us answer questions about pants and fucking sandwiches?
IAN
It’s pretty popular Mick
MICKEY
Okay well you probably like some chicken sandwich thing, you are just always eating chicken.
IAN
Correct! I am always eating chicken. Now: what woud I eat everyday if I could?
MICKEY
I thought this was meant to be PG?
IAN
Mick! C’mon, this is easy!
MICKEY
(Laughing) Okay, fine, probably eggs?
IAN
Yes! Because they can be cooked different ways and I wouldn’t get bored. Next question: my favourite cereal?
MICKEY
This questions are fucking stupid, you don’t eat cereal.
IAN
Correct again, you know me so well! Next one: favourite music?
MICKEY
I don’t know you change your mind every two days. But you’re really into Taylor Shift or something at the moment?
IAN
Taylor Swift, close enough, I’ll give you that point, just because she is great. Now what’s my favourite sports team?
MICKEY
Our little league team?
IAN
Close, you’re in the correct sport.
MICKEY
OH! Red sox! Yeah suck it bitch I know you so well.
IAN
(Laughing) okay, okay that’s correct, now what my eye colour?
MICKEY
Fucking green, who would do this video and not fucking know their boyfriends eye colour?
IAN
True, I mean they are all you look at all the time because you love my beautiful green eyes.
MICKEY
Don’t get a big head shithead
IAN
So romantic, okay whos’ my best friend?
MICKEY
My sister Mandy
IAN
And now last question, what is something that I do that you don’t like?
MICKEY
This shit cause you made me sit for 20 minutes answering stupid fucking questions about you you fucking narcissistic
IAN
Fair enough, you cutie – ow again! And now were finished. I hope you love my tattooed, big hearted boyfriend as much as I do and I shall see you all next week. Bye!
Ian touched a button on the small remote and turned to Mickey, “You did really well, and they will love you.”
Mickey leaned in and kissed Ian softly before parting and thanking him.
“No worries,” Ian replied, “now we need to plan for the next video you will be in.”
“Fuck off!” Mickey yelled and he pushed Ian away from him, hard enough that Ian fell back onto the couch.
“Love you too.”
Mickey blushed, looking down to the ground, "I still won that Snickers bar."