everyone fucks everyone in camelot
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"Your mother made me make my own pie with her yesterday." He said, sitting up to glare. "What is it with your family? Why do none of you respect nobles?" He said and Merlin dropped the plate of food he was carrying. "...I hate you." He sighed, staring at his food bouncing on the ground with a loud clatter. "I should hire your mother as my servant. She wouldn't drop my food." He added with a fierce nod.
"My mother is here?" He asked and Arthur paused.
"You haven’t seen her?"
"No. Fuck. It’s finally happening." He whispered. Arthur stared, absolutely baffled. "She’s come to kill me." He explained and dashed towards the door to peer outside.
"What?" Arthur snorted. "Merlin. Your mother can be very firm, but she’s not the killing type. She is too softhearted for such things." He said and Merlin slammed the door shut, leaning against the wood as if barricading it.
"If you're not careful you'll be next."
Or
Hunith occasionally visits Camelot. Arthur thinks she’s wonderful...Sometimes.
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“I’m sorry, there must be a mistake.” Uther furrows his brows. “That is my son’s manservant.”
“This is Emrys, the most powerful sorcerer who will ever walk the earth. It is our deepest honor to be able to offer his hand to your son.”
“Merlin?” Arthur asks, looking across the hall. Merlin looks the palest and the smallest Arthur has ever seen him. He looks like a scared animal that knows it’s about to be trapped, and that’s when it clicks for Arthur that no part of this is a joke. None of it. “Merlin, what are they talking about?”