Sit Down You're Rocking the Boat
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After the last episode it's a given that Lucifer and Dan would have things to talk about, and to do.
Series
- Part 1 of Sit Down You're Rocking the Boat
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“Don’t take it personally. With me, it’s something of a constant state.”
“You’re in a constant state of arousal?”
“Oh! No!” Lucifer smiled his brightest smile. “More like always coming…or not coming. It's a spiritual attribute."Series
- Part 2 of Sit Down You're Rocking the Boat
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“You roofied me!”
“I did nothing of the kind!”
“Then why do I have a hungover?”
“A hungover?” Lucifer smirked. “Because, you fucked yourself dry.”
The pink roses in Dan’s cheeks turned rusty red.
“Ah! I see it’s all coming back. Don’t worry, I’m as appalled as you are.”Series
- Part 3 of Sit Down You're Rocking the Boat
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“Any outstanding features—scars, marks or tattoos?”
“Two inch fangs, when she’s in human form, and there are light scales on her neck and back. She has a Phoenician anchor tattooed on her left thigh, and really first-class bristols.”
Dan stopped writing. He looked thoughtfully at Lucifer.
“Cherry bombes,” Lucifer announced, bouncing a pair of invisible melons at chest height. “Boobs.” Then Dan’s expression got through to him. “We’re a very dysfunctional family,” he said.Series
- Part 4 of Sit Down You're Rocking the Boat
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“Now look what you’ve done!”
“What do you mean what ‘I’ve’ done?!” Amenadiel said. “Can he can see my wings!”
“I don’t—I told you, he’s one of the complicated ones.”
“Complicated my primaries! He’s having visions! It’s all that that…whatever…you…and your…” Amenadiel couldn’t bring himself to say it.
“Blowjob? Spunk? Gizm? Those are the words you’re failing so eloquently to say.”
“If that’s what you’ve been up to with him. I wouldn't know.”
“Sounds like you and Mazikeen haven’t gotten past the missionary position! Good to know! I’ll have to have a talk with her about enlarging your vocabulary.”Series
- Part 5 of Sit Down You're Rocking the Boat
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“What are those?” Chloe pointed at the envelopes that Lucifer had placed on the bar.
“Prayers and dreams.”
“That’s right, you’re the man who does favors to be repaid at some unspecified time.”
“Maybe never, and then it’s bargain.”
“I have a dream.”
“Do you? Tell me!”
“Ever since I was a little girl, it’s been a dream of mine not to find my husband in a shallow grave. Now, where is he?”Series
- Part 6 of Sit Down You're Rocking the Boat
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In that moment, he would have scooped Dan up in his arms, dropped him on the cool marble, and climbed on top of him. Never mind the boxes and bottles, and the whole mess! The two of them could have been fucking in the middle it, except for the cuff on Dan’s ankle, and the key in Lucifer’s back pocket.
Series
- Part 7 of Sit Down You're Rocking the Boat