Ferret Stabler's World, Excellent
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At The Corner of Lust and Friendship by myfatherwillhearaboutthisss
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
11 Jun 2026
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Summary
It’s 2006, and Hermione Granger wants one thing: to restore her parents’ memories.
With Ministry backing at last, she’s bound for Australia to try; if it works, she might not only get her family back, but change the lives of Janus Thickey Ward patients in the process.
Six months in Sydney should be straightforward enough… except for the guard dog the Minister insists on assigning her.
Enter Draco Malfoy. Once a failed Death Eater, now a MACUSA Auror and expert in cross-cultural cases (read: wrangling Muggles, avoiding Statute disasters, and being extremely irritating about perimeter security).
He’s spent eight years learning how not to be a massive wanker, all while still technically being Lord of Malfoy Manor.
Now? Well, now he’s been ordered to play bodyguard to the Golden Girl.
In a cramped little Bondi Junction house.
For half a year.Unfortunately for some people, Draco Malfoy is more than passably good at the job. What could possibly go wrong?
*stares in capital A-angst, explicit smut, fake dating but make it bureaucratically obnoxious, Draco Malfoy’s anxiety has anxiety, Hermione Granger having feelings against her will, and a HEA for the idiots in love*
Series
- Part 1 of Ferret Stabler's World, Excellent
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Sixteen Candles (and the rest) by myfatherwillhearaboutthisss
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
19 Jun 2026
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Summary
Draco Malfoy is forty-six, late for his own birthday, and being bullied by everyone he loves except his mother.
There is cake (thanks Queen Delia). There is music (Sabrina slay). There is a bean (IYKYK). Eventually, there is very little dignity.
Also: this is now 2/3, because Hermione Granger-Malfoy has demanded a right of reply.
Happy birthday, D-Man. 🎂
Series
- Part 2 of Ferret Stabler's World, Excellent