Clascu2399



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    From the kinkmeme: AU Warlord!Geralt receives Tribute!Jaskier as a sacrifice to appease him in every way possible. Jaskier has no choice on the matter and he’s fully aware of the awful rumours that have spread about Geralt and his ruthless conquests. (But we all know those aren’t legit.) A classic angst with a happy ending please! A dash of smut to heal those scars and a sprinkle of new found love!

    Jaskier arrives at Kaer Morhen knowing his family gave him up without a second thought, and absolutely sure that the dreaded Warlord of the North will value him even less than his own blood did. But the White Wolf and his pack are not what Jaskier expected...and if he's unreasonably lucky, Kaer Morhen might become far more of a home than Lettenhove ever was.

    ...He is, in fact, going to be unreasonably lucky, because the Warlord of the North is a far finer monarch - and a far better man - than Redania's king has ever dreamed of being.

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    21 Jul 2026

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    A locked folder from Shane's phone ends up on the internet for everyone to see, including his teammates. It certainly undercuts their victory against the Bears, but it'll all turn out right. Eventually.

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    06 Jul 2026

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    “We do not say anything about the Hollander situation,” LeClaire tells them even though it sounds like he’s already resigned to what he knows is going to happen.

    After all, Roz gets extremely mad whenever it’s brought up. Not that Cliff can blame him, he’s pretty sure that Roz liked Hollander before this (wouldn’t chirp him half as much if he didn’t). Finding out that he’s such a bastard must sting.

    Not to mention that Roz does not mess around with people that disrespect girls. Or women. Or kids. Or dogs. Or the elderly (excluding Scott Hunter). Or really anyone, if it’s for petty stupid reasons.

    “Of course,” Cliff agrees for both of them since Roz is still too busy texting someone.

    It’s apparently not good enough for LeClaire because he asks, “Roz?”

    “Just one second,” he answers without raising his eyes from his phone or stopping his typing. “Need to get my Jane to agree with something. She’s very stubborn.”

     

    Or. My take on the 'their text leak and now everybody thinks that Shane is an abusive bastard' premise. Featuring Ilya giving a presser, Marly realizing in real time who 'Jane' is and the internet reacting to the craziness.

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    05 Jul 2026

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    “There is one more thing. Given the nature of your fall and the force of impact, we ran a full battery of blood tests to check for any internal issues. Everything looks normal, except for one result that… stood out.”

    Shane’s stomach tightened. Stood out?

    “Given your secondary gender presentation and hormone levels, we also ran a standard pregnancy panel,” she said, her words measured and clear. “And the test came back positive."

    For a moment, the words didn’t land. They floated in the air like dust in the sunlight.

    Positive.

    Pregnancy panel.

    Then, all at once, they crashed into him.

     

    or

     

    Shane Hollander discovers he is pregnant while at the hospital after getting hit in the ice by Marleau in a Boston vs. Montreal Match and after inviting Ilya Rozanov to his cottage.

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    11 Jun 2026

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    Ilya was used to hazing. He had been subjected to it, he had participated in it, and, as a captain, he had stood guard over the rookies and protected them from anything truly harmful. But if he had been asked, Ilya would have approved of this prank. He would have authorized it, given Cliff and Vicky his seal of approval, perhaps even helped orchestrate it.

    Any other day, Ilya might have been happy to play along.

    But, in perfect dramatic irony, it had not happened any other day. It had happened today. And, cherry on top, of course the rookie had to walk in when Shane was already freaking out about Ilya saying his name.

    +++

    A prank-gone-wrong leads to the Boston Bears finding out about Shane and Ilya’s relationship in 2016. The day Ilya first invited Shane into his house. Right after they say each other’s names for the first time. Fuck his life, honestly.

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    04 Jun 2026