calmebyourname
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… yet the words feel unsettling and misplaced like they don’t belong in the world. Like they don’t belong in existence. Like they’re made to be trapped in that secret unnoticed little bubble under reality where Yoongi sees Taehyung, really sees him, rather than freed into a materiality that suddenly seems too harsh.
Because when Taehyung nods and says “Of course, hyung” and they walk near the stairs, Yoongi’s face tells everything he hasn’t in almost seventeen years. And Taehyung doesn’t know the facts yet, or why they’re even there, but he knows what’s about to happen.
He knows it’s hopeless.
“I am dating” Yoongi blurts out too damn slow and Taehyung hates slow-mo and misses time lapse because it stings behind his eyes as if his body has processed the words before his mind and heart “I am dating this guy and I thought I should tell you”
Okay.
Taehyung didn’t know /that/.or
Taehyung has always had a crush on his best friends older brother, Min Yoongi, and that was never a well kept secret. Yoongi never liked Taehyung back either, and that was also never a secret. Why is it then that even thoujgh he just started dating, he suddenly seems closer than ever?
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Jungkook was often convinced he was as deep as the ocean and as unexplored as it, filled with so, so many thoughts that are as alive and as spontaneous as each creature in the sea, thoughts he could barely follow without getting overwhelmed and desperate. The idea of someone else wanting to take their time to dive inside Jungkook’s dark, cold and lonely mind just felt like something so unimaginable he didn’t allow himself to dream even in his mind’s wildest escapades.
So he’s in his room and he’s on his bed and he’s playing guitar, loud enough he doesn’t hear when Jimin comes and hopefully he won’t hear when he and Yoongi start making out. And that’s why he doesn’t notice at first.
There’s an angel standing by his door and he never thought about God and he probably doesn’t believe in one but it is undeniably an angel because humans can’t look like that.
“That was good” the angel mouths and he probably said it out loud but Jungkook didn’t hear because there’s this melody dragging inside his brain even though he long stopped playing.
Jungkook only blinks at him.or
Jungkook and Taehyung get to learn life doesn't have to be as lonely anymore
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And if things started randomly and in different points in a timeline for them, or even ended in different moments, even if Namjoon has been holding himself together, even if he has been fighting against it, everyone has a breaking point and his comes in a form of him reading on the couch and Jungkook falling asleep on the loveseat right next to him, nose inches from Namjoon’s thigh.
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Namjoon has been holding himself back for a long time, but one day they're there and he's reading and Jungkook is having a wet dream right before him and he doesn't know how he's gonna survive this.
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“So” Seokjin’s voice pierce the thick layer of quiet, not sounding like noise but sounding like part of the silence itself, like one of the many instruments played in a song “I know I just got back and we just met but…” Yoongi looks at him, the elder licking his lips absentmindedly and still looking like a rehearsed movement, graceful and lofty, in the good sense of the word “I was thinking if you would like to give me your number so maybe we could have dinner?”
“Uh” it’s always the dumbest sounds that come out, Yoongi registers as his own voice breaks the silence, the silence that Seokjin is a part of, and Yoongi just sounds pitchy and strangled like a cat hissing, running from a furious dog and reaching a dead end “I’m straight”
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Min Yoongi is straight. He is. He has known it all his life. But then there's Jungkook's brother, and he looks too good and Yoongi looks too much and they get along too well. But Yoongi is straight.
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Jin and Yoongi are more than best friends, they’re connected. It started a year ago,when they fell asleep in each other’s embrace and unlearned to live without it, so they do it everyday, cuddling each other softly. When the sun comes, their feelings are buried under their fear of confessing to each other and they act like nothing happened.
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All Min Yoongi wants is to finish college. He wants to get through the remaining five months of his last semester, complete his final project, get his degree and get the hell out of here.
And then Park Jimin happens.
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- English
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- 63,805
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Bookmarked by calmebyourname
05 Jun 2021
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“You were nice about it,” Jimin says. “I don’t know who else would be. I’ve never actually…told anyone else. Except Tae.” Yoongi doesn’t move. “You said yourself it’s not a big deal. You probably kiss someone new every weekend.” Jimin pauses, waits, and then very quietly: “Why not me?”
Yoongi’s shoulders lift with a sigh, his face still downturned to the breakfast bar, hidden from view. “It’s not the same,” he mumbles.
*
Jimin's made it to 20 without experiencing his first kiss, and Yoongi's the quiet, grumpy guy he turns to for help. Slight problem: Yoongi doesn't like him.
- Language:
- English
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- 52,360
- Chapters:
- 6/6
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- 364
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Bookmarked by calmebyourname
05 Jun 2021
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In which Jimin's older brother gets a boyfriend, and one day, said boyfriend discovers Jimin's biggest secret. The only option that's left for Jimin is to do everything he orders him to do in order to keep him quiet and prevent his secret to be known, especially by his parents.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 31,165
- Chapters:
- 3/4
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- 168
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Bookmarked by calmebyourname
21 Mar 2020