downbuddie
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Summary
“Eddie, you can’t just give up.”
“I’m not giving up.”
Buck turns and points an accusing carrot at him. “You are. You’re doing that self-punishment thing where you think that because you messed up before you don’t deserve to try again. Which is stupid.”
“Every relationship I’ve ever had has been a disaster,” Eddie says, sounding angry, but not at Buck. “I never do any of it right. I’ve never done a single part of it right.”
“Eds, I know it feels that way, but when you find the right girlfri-”
“I don't want another girlfriend Buck!” Eddie yells.
Or
Buck remains determined to find Eddie the love of his life.
Eddie already has, he's just coming to terms with it.
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Buck’s jaw clenches. “This isn’t you.”
Eddie’s smile turns mean, borderline unrecognizable even to himself. Buck is right, this isn’t him. It doesn’t even sound like his voice. But he’s exhausted. He’s hurt. And he’s done pretending there’s a way out of this that doesn’t involve blood in the water—they’re too far gone for that.
This wasn’t the plan, but he doesn’t pull back from the fight. He doubles down, clinging to the belief that devastation is better than emptiness, that being hated is better than being erased.
“Funny,” Eddie says softly. “Is that what you tell yourself when you fuck anyone who’ll have you? That it doesn’t mean anything? That it’s easier than admitting you’re trying not to think about me?”
Or,
Eddie figures his shit out. Eventually.
An Eddie Diaz character study, if you will.Series
- Part 2 of a coward's first taste of courage
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- Words:
- 37,916
- Works:
- 12
- Bookmarks:
- 74
Bookmarked by downbuddie
11 Dec 2025
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Summary
Eddie knows that this is ridiculous, okay? He’s aware that he could just tell Buck about his feelings, and they could kiss under the mistletoe, and it’d be happily ever after, etc, etc.
Unfortunately, Eddie isn’t very good at asking for what he wants.
Or, Eddie wants to kiss Buck under the mistletoe. He enacts a plan about it.
Series
- Part 11 of Pal's 12 Days of Ficsmas
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Summary
“C'mere," Buck says, sitting up to scoot closer to Eddie.
"What are you doing?” Eddie asks, and Buck sighs.
"You can just kiss me, get a taste of the lip balm, and tell me what flavour you think it is.”
Eddie can’t believe his ears.
"That is such a stupid way to win a bet, Buck."
“Oh so you concede?"
Eddie rolls his eyes, shaking his head before planting both hands on the sides of Buck's face and hauling him in to press their lips together.
OR
Buck and Eddie make a bet on whether or not Eddie can guess all of Buck's lip balm flavours, and in order for Eddie to get a taste, they have to kiss.