i_am_emma
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Summary
He met Jess in his first week at Stanford.
Everything after this fact is confused: it’s only before Jess, and after Jess. But even that gets blurry. He meets Jess in his first week at Stanford and wishes he could live in this moment, and there’s before Jess and after Jess, and everything which touches her—wanting to be a lawyer, all of Stanford, all of education, even love—all of it is poisoned by the smoke of the fires which kill her.
But she’d—she’d want him to be happy.
She’d hate to see him now.
.......
Promised over a year ago - from TBaH Sam's perspective. Lots of grief, lots of character study. Please check the tags.
Series
- Part 2 of The World to Come
Bookmarked by i_am_emma
24 Feb 2026
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Summary
Twenty-three years of head-over-heels, devastating devotion and love, love, love for the man with bright eyes and dark hair. Fourteen years of friends, best friends, of always together. One moment of rejection.
Nine years of apart. Nine years of heartbreak, nine years of continents away, of not speaking, of no acknowledgement, no interaction, no closure, no peace. No happiness. Nine years of Dean’s life entering motions, going through them, constant, cold and mechanic, like clockwork. Nine years of alone.
God. Nine years. A lot has changed. And yet Dean still loves Cas just the same. Even if his heart hurts all kinds of different.
On the day of Jimmy Novak's funeral, Dean sees Cas for the first time in nine years. He adored Castiel the moment he met him, at only four years old. But after fourteen years of friendship destroyed by one moment of heartbreak, and after nine years of silence, Dean is convinced Cas will want nothing to do with him. And it's killing him.
Series
- Part 1 of The World to Come
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 383,089
- Chapters:
- 70/70
- Collections:
- 5
- Comments:
- 3,514
- Kudos:
- 6,729
- Bookmarks:
- 2,434
- Hits:
- 278,999
Bookmarked by i_am_emma
22 Feb 2026
Bookmarker's Notes
the most beautiful pain my heart could have ever, ever been capable of feeling
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Summary
“Dean,” Sam says softly, "I think that you have to heal your old wounds with dad to break the curse.”
“I can’t.” The words are out of his mouth before he thinks them.
“You can, Dean. It’s- this is- I don’t know everything that happened with you and Dad, okay? I’m not gonna pretend to know. But you gotta work through this, man, curse or not. I wish you- I wish I would’ve known. I could’ve helped.”
Dean shoots him a glare out of principle. “I don’t need help, I need the fucker to stay dead.”
or the one where dean finally gets the closure he deserves
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,845
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 3
- Comments:
- 151
- Kudos:
- 2,286
- Bookmarks:
- 332
- Hits:
- 19,997
Bookmarked by i_am_emma
17 Feb 2026
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Summary
“What else was I supposed to say, Sam?” Dean asks him. “I’m not...look, Cas is my best friend, and I care about him. That’s it.”
“And you renovated a house for him,” Sam continues. “And live with him.”
or: a year in the life, in which it takes some time, but they figure it out
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 103,254
- Chapters:
- 13/13
- Collections:
- 8
- Comments:
- 730
- Kudos:
- 4,942
- Bookmarks:
- 1,906
- Hits:
- 97,741
Bookmarked by i_am_emma
14 Feb 2026
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Summary
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From the outside Castiel Novak looks like a regular guy: a good job, two teenage kids, a nice house and a crappy car he’s way too attached to.
But there’s one thing no one knows about him: that, over twenty years ago, he used to live next to none other than Dean Winchester – back then a brash and loud-mouthed boy and nowadays a huge movie star and Hollywood’s sweetheart.
Castiel never bothered to tell anyone about his childhood friend because frankly, who would believe him? Probably even Dean himself already forgot about his former awkward and weird neighbor, so Castiel seriously doesn’t see any point in mentioning the whole thing ever.
But then an interview on national TV happens where Dean reveals way more about his past than ever before … and Castiel - as well as the rest of the world - suddenly realizes that he left a much bigger impact on Dean’s life than he originally thought.
-Series
- Part 1 of Starstruck
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 203,515
- Chapters:
- 50/50
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 6,871
- Kudos:
- 9,664
- Bookmarks:
- 2,158
- Hits:
- 316,940
Bookmarked by i_am_emma
11 Feb 2026