jijal
Fandoms
- BTOB (Band) (20)
- Hannibal (TV) (2)
- Andor (TV) (2)
- Call of Duty (Video Games) (1)
- 文豪ストレイドッグス | Bungou Stray Dogs (1)
Recent works
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Summary
A heavy sigh slips past his lips when he’s stripped down to his underwear. It’s still there, he realises. The panic, the guilt, the crippling realisation that he’ll never escape — not merely woven into his clothes, not to be shed too easily. It all sits nestled into the core of his body. A weight on his chest. Carved into the ridges of his brain. It’s not new. Ghost knows. It’s a fundamental truth, a primal instinct. A part of his genetic make-up like the colour of his eyes or the freckles on his skin. It’s not new, it’s always been for as long as he has. Ghost knows, but the realisation chokes him all the same.
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It's not the first time Ghost is captured and tortured. But it's the first time he can't shake it off.
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Summary
Kleya looks up from the datapad clutched in her hands, almost as if frozen in time from when Vel last saw her — at the dining table with a blanket loosely draped over her shoulders.
It’s the exact same spot Kleya sat after Vel found her wandering the woods on her first night on Yavin, a steaming mug clasped tightly in her hands and everything that brought her here etched into her face. Kleya slept in Vel’s hut that night, and never slept anywhere else.
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Bill and Holden find themselves trapped in the woods between Colorado pine trees and a man watching from the shadows.
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Summary
At once, Cassian’s own breathing is foreign to him — softened by nothing, too loud inside of his own skull. It echoes and echoes and echoes.
When his ears start ringing, he runs. It follows him through bushes and trees and trodden paths, ringing and static, his feet hitting the ground and his ragged pants burning in his throat.
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Will tilts his head back, gaze fixed at the ceiling, his own laboured breathing the only sound breaking the silence as he waits. He trusts Hannibal, trusts him to know when to stop, to only take what he needs and what Will can bear to lose.
Then again, he would let Hannibal bleed him dry just the same.
Recent series
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- Words:
- 15,548
- Works:
- 1
- Bookmarks:
- 1
Recent bookmarks
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Summary
Cassian Andor has grown to be an expert at ignoring his own discomfort in service of the Rebellion. Bacta keeps the physical scars almost unnoticeable and compartmentalization allows him to ignore the gaping wounds left in his psyche after years of fighting. It works for the most part; the medkit mends and his training holds.
But while trying to enjoy a quiet night alone with Melshi, it all catches up to him.
Series
Bookmarked by jijal
10 Sep 2025
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I'll be looking at the moon(s), but I'll be seeing you by 16miles
Fandoms: Star Wars - All Media Types, Andor (TV)
06 May 2025
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Summary
If Melshi is at all shocked that Cassian grabs his collar, tugging him forward until their noses crunch together, he doesn’t show it. Cassian goes cross-eyed from trying to look at Melshi directly. They’re close enough to inhale each other’s sour breath. Panting, Cassian licks his lips, torn between pressing them to Melshi’s or bashing their heads violently against one another until he passes out.
“I need you to wake up,” Melshi says, voice breaking. Cassian can taste every word. “Just wake up.”
Cassian Andor is reliving the same day over and over.
Bookmarked by jijal
25 May 2025
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Summary
He wades in it now, eyes still open, fixed on the speckled ceiling, begging himself not to crave bomb blasts and artillery fire in his childhood bedroom. Although…there might be something beautiful about it all, Johnny supposes, those noises in the thick. The gasps in between discharge that say: I’m here, I’m a part of this song too.
After a near-fatal injury, John MacTavish finds himself back in his hometown in Scotland. Fresh off an untimely discharge, he's forced to cope with disability, his dysfunctional family, and the lingering knowledge that there are some things he's just not ready to leave behind...
Series
- Part 1 of silver and gold
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 167,708
- Chapters:
- 15/15
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 3,630
- Kudos:
- 10,259
- Bookmarks:
- 3,032
- Hits:
- 263,151
Bookmarked by jijal
20 May 2025
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Summary
There are only two places you can go once the Empire catches you: to prison or to your grave. Ever the optimist, Nemik chooses prison.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,556
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 1
- Kudos:
- 35
- Bookmarks:
- 8
- Hits:
- 230
Bookmarked by jijal
14 Jul 2024
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carry a torch by StorytellerSecrets for jijal
Fandoms: Andor (TV), Star Wars - All Media Types
11 Jun 2024
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Summary
Things never stop hurting, and they never stop being hard. It's—easier, maybe, when they struggle in tandem. They can hold each other up.
“Cass,” comes Nemik’s voice eventually, slowly drifting down the hall. Then, a little louder, “Cassian.”
Relief is the hitch in Nemik’s voice when Cassian goes over. Relief for Cassian, mostly. It’s not a victory for Nemik today. There is no quiet celebration.
For many things, there may never be.
But Nemik tries, and he lives. They both live.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,794
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 6
- Kudos:
- 41
- Bookmarks:
- 6
- Hits:
- 318
Bookmarked by jijal
18 Jun 2024