monkypopfm
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“Wait, wait,” Lance stood up. “You are driving to Houston.”
“Yes.”
“A drive that’s over thirty hours.”
“Yup.”
“By yourself.”
“Sure seems like it.”
“To clean out a storage container of your dead mother, that you have never met, that is now legally under your name.”
“Correct.”
Lance wondered if Keith had lost his mind.
“Keith, there could be dead bodies in that storage container!” He argued. “Or a meth lab. Or worse, mannequins dressed up like dolls sat at a tea party or some weird shit like that.”
Keith offered him an unimpressed blink. “I’ll be fine.”
“Keith, this is insane. You can’t go by yourself!”
Keith glanced at him as he shouldered his backpack.
“Come with me then.”
And that small, damned smirk tilted Keith’s lips as he held Lance’s gaze.
“What do you think, Lance?” He asked. “2,251 miles. Think you could handle it?”
Lance stopped short.
Contemplated.
And, well. Lance had nothing to do either.
So. That’s how this all started.Two disasters drive cross-country to clean out a storage container that may have dead bodies hidden inside and, hey, maybe a bit of love as well.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 44,844
- Chapters:
- 10/10
- Comments:
- 439
- Kudos:
- 2,517
- Bookmarks:
- 604
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- 29,804
Bookmarked by monkypopfm
20 Apr 2026
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"I find myself wondering, sweet reader, when exactly someone will take a shovel to the back of this racist statue's metal head and begin dismantling our university’s scandalous love affair with the most problematic donors they could possibly find. I’m looking at you, President Zarkon, kindly remove your hand from the Republican Party’s dick. This is a liberal arts college for God’s sake."
When Galra University's Tumblr page, meant for football game updates and pleads for attendees for club meetings, is plagued by a mysterious writer determined to eviscerate every toxic part of the college, Lance is intrigued. When he becomes a leading character in the anonymous letters, well, he gets a little more curious. Lance becomes determined to unveil the writer and find out a) what is his problem exactly and b) does he really think Lance's eyes are that blue?
A tale in which Lance is oblivious and pining for the hot nerd in the back of his Greek mythology class, Keith can wield a pen with deadly cruelty, and you, dear readers, suffer from the pains of dramatic irony.
Series
- Part 1 of The Dear Reader-Verse
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 80,982
- Chapters:
- 16/16
- Comments:
- 1,189
- Kudos:
- 5,997
- Bookmarks:
- 1,660
- Hits:
- 89,340
Bookmarked by monkypopfm
24 Feb 2026
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Summary
“How about a bet?”
Keith paused.
“If I can make you fall in love with the holidays by Christmas night, you’ll take the shift.”
Keith snorted, turning to face Lance. He kept that vaguely annoyed smile on his face, but nothing could hide the gleam of interest in his eyes.
“You’re not going to make that happen.”
“Okay,” Lance shrugged. “Then what’s the harm of taking the bet?”
Keith’s eyes rose to the ceiling, thinking.
“And,” Lance rushed in, “and I’ll sweeten the deal. I’ll work New Years as well.”
Now that got Keith’s attention.
They had drawn straws for who would work New Years Day weeks ago. It was one of the worst shifts for a toy store. Being deathly hungover while listening to kids scream and toys screech was the stuff of nightmares. Keith had lost and was stuck with the shift.
A slow grin tugged at Keith’s lips. “You’re insane.”***
When Lance gets stuck with the Christmas shift, he immediately turns to Keith, a self-proclaimed Scrooge, to cover the shift. When Keith refuses, Lance offers up a bet. If he can make Keith fall in love with the holidays before Christmas, Keith will take the shift. Nonsense straight from a Hallmark movie follows.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 88,631
- Chapters:
- 26/26
- Comments:
- 1,084
- Kudos:
- 2,150
- Bookmarks:
- 511
- Hits:
- 38,381
Bookmarked by monkypopfm
24 Feb 2026
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"Lance had watched Keith Kogane win a bar fight with a broken hand, rip open a keg with a knife, and complete a whole wretched ensemble of activities you definitely shouldn’t do with a beer in hand.
And yet here he was, glittery Sharpie in hand, waiting to sign Lucy’s copy of Altea.
Lance opened his mouth to say something arguably rude and not appropriate for their current audience. Until he remembered that he himself had either watched or participated in these activities and was now holding a four-year-old containing his DNA. So Lance didn’t have much of a leg to stand on either."
When Lance runs into his ex-boyfriend at a children’s book signing, he not only finds out that Keith Kogane ages like fine wine, but he also apparently wrote his daughter’s favorite book. As Keith lingers in town, Lance frantically tries to keep his daughter from realizing that the writer is not only a person from Lance’s past, but a character in her bedtime stories as well.
Series
- Part 1 of The King and His Fisherman-verse
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 85,359
- Chapters:
- 10/10
- Comments:
- 616
- Kudos:
- 2,861
- Bookmarks:
- 760
- Hits:
- 41,102
Bookmarked by monkypopfm
24 Feb 2026
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“Let me guess. Body horror.”
There was a delicate eyebrow raise. “Impressive guess.”
Lance offered a halfhearted wave to Keith’s SAW T-shirt. “I’m sure you sit in your cave and drink blood and think of all the ways a human body can break in half.”
That earned him a smile with teeth. And yeah, sure, Lance could see what James found attractive. If he squinted. Chugged more wine.
“And I’m sure you spend your time thinking of the least outrageous age gap you can have between your love interests.”
Lance’s eyes narrowed.***
If you were to consider some towns sleepy, then Luna Falls spends most of the time snoring. The only time Luna Falls wakes up is while it hosts its annual writer retreat. Aspiring authors from all over the United States travel to New England for the three week seminar, gunning for a publication deal awarded to one lucky writer. Lance, a Luna Falls local, has spent his entire life preparing, saving, and writing. He joins the fellowship of writers in hopes to not only leave with publication prospects, but to also show the power of the commonly underrated romance genre. Imagine his displeasure when a brooding horror writer steals the spotlight right out from under him.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 112,115
- Chapters:
- 14/14
- Comments:
- 596
- Kudos:
- 1,038
- Bookmarks:
- 238
- Hits:
- 20,064
Bookmarked by monkypopfm
24 Feb 2026