rollsparrot
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“It’s gold all the way through!” she snapped at him.
“Yes,” he murmured, gazing back at her, stunned. “It is.” And in the glittering depths of her eyes, he could see that she was indeed bright and golden and true, all the way through.Bookmarked by rollsparrot
05 May 2026
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BEEN TO HELL AND BACK, I CAN SHOW YOU VOUCHERS by WhatMurdah
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
22 Feb 2026
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Draco came to, naked, sprawled across the pentagram on the worn floorboards of the inn’s rented room. He lifted his head. His body had smeared the chalk and the salt on re-entry.
His tailbone hurt.
His head hurt.
He was thirsty.
Draco slowly pushed up to sitting. His wand was in his hand. His whole spine hurt. Something grazed his leg—his head whipped around, making the headache flare. A mouse? A rat? This room was disgusting.
No—
Hold on—
Draco twisted to look behind him.
F**K.
He had a tail.
Draco Malfoy—now an Unspeakable assigned to the Death Room—went to Hell and came back with a tail. Hermione Granger wants to help. Theo Nott doesn’t.
BEEN TO HELL AND BACK, I CAN SHOW YOU VOUCHERS is inspired by the bureaucratic implications of the titular Lil Wayne bar and me reading three books about Cardan Greenbriar because I thought there would be tail smut.
Series
- Part 1 of DRACO MALFOY HAS A SLUTTY LITTLE TAIL
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 32,758
- Chapters:
- 8/8
- Comments:
- 1,106
- Kudos:
- 799
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- 157
- Hits:
- 20,749
Bookmarked by rollsparrot
01 Feb 2026
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“In my humble opinion there’s only three things that men should be and that is bloody, slutty, and pathetic.” And, on a good day, Draco Malfoy can be all three.
When war heroine Hermione Granger and Azkaban-tattooed war criminal Draco Malfoy are forced to wed as part of Shacklebolt’s controversial Reconciliation Act, they openly fight the match and each other—their public brawls breathlessly reported by the press.
Secretly, a deeply traumatized Draco delights in Hermione’s attention and pines for a real marriage with her—even as her forced proximity to the Black family magic irritates the cursed scar Bellatrix left on her arm, reminding her why she can never truly trust or forgive him. Then Hermione discovers that Draco’s blood will soothe the scar . . . and Draco is willing to trade his blood for her body.
(With post-war blood purity politics, black market potioneers, Pansy Parkinson’s career advice, the Malfoys blackmailing Hermione’s Wizengamot opposition, BDE Neville Longbottom hunting Death Eaters, a slutty Theo Nott serving as Draco’s right-hand man, and Crookshanks loose in Malfoy Manor.)
Series
- Part 1 of THE BLOODY, SLUTTY, AND PATHETIC SERIES
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 195,969
- Chapters:
- 21/21
- Comments:
- 7,607
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- 32,998
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- 13,070
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- 2,055,998
Bookmarked by rollsparrot
28 May 2025
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In which Cardan and his friends are Juilliard students, but no one can sing like Jude. Modern AU, angst and smut because it wouldn’t be Jurdan otherwise.
Bookmarked by rollsparrot
20 Dec 2024
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Rewriting scenes from the book but adding a little of my own special touch ✨ spice ✨
> +18 <Depending on the chapter, BOTH Cardan and Jude and dom and sub. That's how I see their relationship.
!! EDIT: I'm not currently updating the story and this writing is far too bad. I was a bit younger when I wrote this and since then my writing style changed a lot, so forgive it. In time I might rewrite it or at least take out some scene that are more descriptive.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 126,961
- Chapters:
- 21/21
- Comments:
- 172
- Kudos:
- 1,611
- Bookmarks:
- 221
- Hits:
- 102,824
Bookmarked by rollsparrot
19 Dec 2024