salamanderrr



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    '“Look I understand, you’ve got to check up on the new occupants, make sure I’m a proper ‘fit’ for the neighborhood or whatever euphemism you’re going to use this time, 'the greater good,' I saw the film, I get it. But I peeked in at the place next door the agent mentioned and if you aren’t bothering him I really don't think you should be-”

    “I’m your neighbor,” Aziraphale interrupted. “I own that place next door?”

    “Oh.”'

    Since the next shop over closed down, Aziraphale's had a peaceful few months, barring those unpleasant interactions with the men in cheap suits who keep trying to persuade him to sell his shop. But now a (handsome) new owner has taken up residence beside him and, horror of horrors, he wants to open up a coffee shop.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    23,807
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Collections:
    5
    Comments:
    899
    Kudos:
    7,195
    Bookmarks:
    1,592
    Hits:
    69,592

    20 Feb 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    In which people keep mistaking Crowley and Aziraphale for a couple, and Aziraphale starts to wonder if there might be something to it.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,748
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Comments:
    3,512
    Kudos:
    47,872
    Bookmarks:
    7,771
    Hits:
    377,822

    03 Feb 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    When writer and restaurant critic Aziraphale starts chatting with the handsome and captivating Crowley every weekend at the local pub, he thinks may have found the perfect distraction from a rather irritating situation at work, considering work is the one topic neither of them have ever broached.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    27,592
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    189
    Kudos:
    587
    Bookmarks:
    124
    Hits:
    6,736

    03 Feb 2026

  4. Public Bookmark 51

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    Aziraphale has been going to Crowley's astronomy lectures at the local planetarium for a few months now. It is only because he is really interested in space, of course. He loves all the... constellations. And the stars!

    And then Crowley asks him out for coffee.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,466
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    105
    Kudos:
    469
    Bookmarks:
    51
    Hits:
    3,426

    30 Jan 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    "So. Part of the whole Phantom shtick is unhealthily fixating on a beautiful young ingénue." The Serpent pulled a grimace, or at least appeared to. Again, that blasted mask. "Very important, the League of Phantoms* has rules on it and everything. Demands at least an abduction or two within the first fiscal year, and I was rather behind, so-"

    *Yes, they unionise. The healthcare package is frankly breathtaking.

    "Well, then you've made a dreadful mistake! It surely can't have escaped your attention that I am NOT an ingénue!" Aziraphale flustered. "I'm sorry to inform you, dear boy, but you've kidnapped a forty-something bookkeeper who occasionally understudies the understudy of the third tree on the left!"

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    24,197
    Chapters:
    13/13
    Comments:
    344
    Kudos:
    578
    Bookmarks:
    137
    Hits:
    7,954

    25 Jul 2024