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i'm learning the meaning of your heart by stickynoted for intothewoodz
Fandoms: &TEAM (Band)
25 Dec 2025
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Summary
Fuma isn’t entirely sure what jolted him awake first. Lightning and thunder crackle in rapid succession outside his bedroom window, wind shaking the panes of this old building. There’s the incessant buzzing of his phone from across the room, likely from the automated storm alerts. And then there’s garbled speech followed by silence.
Nicholas is a sleeptalker.
Fuma learns Mandarin through Nicholas' sleeptalking.
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Nicholas had just finished pouring the coffee into a cup when long arms wind around him from behind.
“Morning,” Nicholas says, nuzzling into the brown mop of hair on his shoulder. Euijoo’s greeting gets lost somewhere between his pulse and spine. “Toast?”
Nicholas spends a morning in his and Euijoo's third apartment.
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such persistence, wore down my resistance by stickynoted
Fandoms: ZEROBASEONE | ZB1 (Korea Band)
17 Jun 2025
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“And… waiting for my answer?” Taerae mumbles. Jiwoong falls silent. Taerae gnaws at his lower lip, picking at a flaky spot with his teeth. The metallic taste of blood blooms on his tongue.
“Doesn’t it feel like you’re wasting time?”
Jiwoong looks at him again.
“Am I?”
Taerae has realized a crush. A slow car ride through traffic might just be the push he needs to say something.
Recent bookmarks
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“No boyfriend? Girlfriend? Hobbies?”
“Am I getting interviewed for something?” Kei laughed. “I’m a lesbian, but no, and… does working out count? I’ve been slacking since my roommate moved out, though. He was my gym buddy.”
Nico tilted her head. If Kei hadn’t been watching her, she would’ve missed the way Nico’s eyes flitted up and down, like she was trying to figure out what Kei’s arms looked like under her sweater.
“You looking for a new one?” Nico asked casually, half-joking, half not. Her ears twitched, and her tail swished behind her almost tentatively, like she was gauging Kei’s reaction.
An amused smile spread across Kei’s face. “A roommate, a gym buddy, or a girlfriend?”
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"Fancy seeing you here, Fuma Murata."
Right. That's why he's doing this.
All six foot one of Yudai Koga materializes in front of him, taking his sunglasses off and waving at Fuma as he gets off of the next bus. Fuma's pretty sure things are suddenly moving in slow motion. Yudai's brushing his hair away from his forehead, one strand refusing to move, smiling as he moves toward him. Eventually Fuma remembers he's supposed to smile back.
"K. I wasn't sure you were coming back this summer." Hopefully his voice sounds normal.
(Fuma's been attending Shinwa Summer Camp for ten years, and he's been in love with Yudai for nine years and 364 days.)
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It is a stupidly terrifying thought to picture Seoul without Nicholas in it. Nicholas has been less of a friend and more of a fact, something Euijoo never considered removable. And now—maybe he is. Maybe tomorrow or February or some terrible soon, Nicholas will shift categories from person I know like a second self to person I used to know.
And if this goes horribly—if Euijoo does what he’s planning and it detonates right in his face—he can always claim ignorance in the morning. He can blame the beer. He can say he doesn’t remember. Because what he’s about to do is stupid. Not just stupid—borderline catastrophic. But there’s another voice, quieter, stubborn: better to look stupid now than to spend the rest of your life wondering what if.
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It would be so much easier if things between them had never gone sour, if their friends could stop feeling like they’re walking on eggshells any time the two of them are brought up, if Euijoo’s heart doesn’t feel like it’s breaking all over again every time he looks at Nicholas. But nothing is ever easy when it comes to Nicholas––it’s one of the things that made Euijoo fall for him in the first place––and getting over him has proved to be the hardest.
Bookmarked by stickynoted
15 Sep 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
i think about that heart radical metaphor often
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Nicholas opens the door and gestures for Euijoo to get in first.
He says, “You trust me, right?”
Nicholas and Euijoo in Taiwan. The past comes up from the river.

