xeavi
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Summary
Robert slumps into his chair, headset half-on, the SDN bullpen still humming with the last dregs of the night shift. The coffee tastes like battery acid, but it’s the only thing keeping his eyes open.
Then the comm crackles.
“Hello, Robert.”
Phenomaman’s voice, flat as a gravestone.
“I would like to learn about intercourse from a human person.”
Robert chokes on his coffee. Why is this his life?
Series
- Part 1 of Dispatch NSFW Fics
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 141,737
- Chapters:
- 12/?
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- 1
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Bookmarked by xeavi
28 Nov 2025
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Spider-Man: the government experiment/agent-gone-rogue/spider-turned-human. Or something. (According to the Avengers) by WHYISEVERYNAMETAKEN for KingLvffy
Fandoms: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), Spider-Man - All Media Types, Marvel
19 Jul 2024
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Summary
The first time Peter Parker meets (some of) the Avengers, it's in a sewer and/or warehouse-he wasn't able to get a good look at the place, sue him for his uncertainty-after he had (apparently) gotten kidnapped.
The first time the Avengers meet Spider-Man, he's calling them jerkwads from the top of Hawkeye's roof... according to Hawkeye. In Peter's humble opinion, rooftops are communical property among vigilantes, especially during alien invasions.
OR
Seven times the Avengers were confused about Spider-Man's identity, and one time his identity was revealed.
(A story told over the course of seventeen years, seven different world-ending catastrophes, and a kidnapping.)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 9,291
- Chapters:
- 1/1
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- 22
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- 142
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Bookmarked by xeavi
08 Oct 2024
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Summary
and twilight gives me;
an inner sanctity
-- twilight, bôa- Words:
- 41,507
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- 3
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- 19
Bookmarked by xeavi
02 Oct 2024
Bookmarker's Notes
This is so fucked up I love it
Poor Ghost this will not end well
For the sake of his psych it's set in canon time-line -
Paradise (spread out with a butter knife) by Sarah_Sandwich
Fandoms: Spider-Man - All Media Types, Deadpool - All Media Types, Marvel (Comics)
17 Jan 2021
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Summary
He sighs from where he’s prone, arms akimbo, and roof gravel digging into his spine. “I lost my job. My… other job. The one that actually pays the bills.”
He doesn’t want to dwell on why he’s telling Deadpool of all people. Surely it has nothing to do with his desperate lack of friends. MJ is in California chasing her dreams, Harry’s undergoing treatment for his mental health and isn’t allowed visitors (not that it matters since they blacklisted Peter after last time), and Gwen… Well.
And it’s not like he can talk to Aunt May without her worrying about him starving to death under a bridge or something so… Deadpool it is. Man, when did his life get this pathetic?
OR: The one where Peter and Wade are literal soulmates but don't realize it for literal years because they're literal idiots.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 72,376
- Chapters:
- 5/5
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Bookmarked by xeavi
21 Aug 2024
Bookmarker's Notes
Cutest mother fuckers in the world. I've been ignoring this work for 2 years assuming it will be heavy shit only to end up with diabetes
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Death Before Inaction by hppjmxrgosg
Fandoms: Spider-Man - All Media Types, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, Daredevil (TV), The Defenders (Marvel TV)
24 Jun 2025
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Summary
“Fuck off, Nicky.”
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“Hasn’t anyone ever told you spider-napping is illegal?”
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“You can’t hold me here, I know my spider-rights.”
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“God, you guys are so old. What are you? Like 27?”
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“Scale of 1 to 10, how upset would you be if I told you I banged your mom?”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Or, I got my grubby little hands on the spider-man time line and fucked around a little bit. Not much (everything) changes.