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Luffy was crying.
I don’t think I’ve ever heard him cry since the war on Marine Ford two years ago, and I didn’t think the always-happy-Strawhat would cry again.
At least I hoped he wouldn’t.
And it wasn’t a loud cry, no. If I wouldn’t stand in front of him, I would have thought he fell asleep.
It was silent. No movement in his shoulders, only small, unsteady breathes and closed, red eyes, letting tiny tears out.
It hurts to see him like this.
Why was he crying?
Luffy wasn’t a silent person. He does everything he does annoyingly loud. He laughed so loud that sometimes, if it wouldn’t be such a pleasant sound, my ears would hurt. He can’t talk quietly. He doesn’t eat without making noises. He fights loudly and he even if he is asleep, he makes sounds.
This wasn’t right.
“Luffy-ya?”
He blinked and looked at my feet before his eyes meet mine. “Oh, Torao. What’s up?”
This definitely wasn’t right.
“Nothing.” Suddenly I became aware that I didn’t really know what to do next. I was never good with humans and their feelings. “Is everything alright?”
Luffy didn’t answer. He looked away, obviously trying to hide his face.
I hated that I didn’t know how to help him.
I was probably bothering him.
“I’m sorry.” I murmured. “I’ll go, you don’t have to tell me.”
Feeling awkward and wrong, I turned to make my way inside the ship, back to my bunk, looking up to the dark, cloudy sky.
Not a single star was to see.
“Torao. Wait.”
His voice was so small, I almost didn’t hear it. Unsure what to do, I stopped and turned around, seeing that Luffy stood up and wiped his tears of his face.
I wanted to hug him.
It hurts to see him like this.
“Luffy-ya… did something happen?”
He shoke his head and suddenly his arms were wrapped around me, hugging me firmly. I was surprised to see how perfect his head fits on my shoulder.
Awkwardly, I placed my arms on his back and rested my chin on his head. It wasn’t the first time he hugged me – the Strawhat was a touchy person – but normally they only last a few second.
For a few moments, there was silence. I didn’t know what I should say, so I waited. Then I heard Luffy murmuring something. “…-lmost lost you.”
“What?” I wasn’t sure if I heard right. “What are you talking about?”
“I almost couldn’t save you.”
Oh.
He was talking about Dressrosa.
I gripped him tightly. “But you did. I’m here.”
He sniffed. “Yeah. But I wasn’t strong enough.”
I had heart this already, two years ago. Back then, I didn’t really know Luffy and rescued him without thinking.
After Fire Fists death.
Even tho I didn’t know much about Portgas and his brother, I almost couldn’t stand seeing the Strawhat like that. But back then, I was helpless.
“Luffy-ya, you were. I’m not.” I mumbled. “It’s my fault, I shouldn’t have gotten in that situation in the first place and I definitely shouldn’t have gotten you in that situation. I deserve everything that happened.”
I felt Luffy shaking his head against my shoulder. “No. Mingo deserves to suffer. He hurts you.”
“Not anymore.”
He shoke his head again. “His existence hurts you. And every thought about him, doesn’t it?”
I was surprised how right he was. Since when was this careless idiot so good at reading him?
“I’m here, Trafalgar D. Water Law.” Luffy whispered, snuggling closer. “I won’t let him hurt you ever again. I will get stronger, I promise.”
Now it was my turn to cry. I didn’t know what to say.
If this were any other person, I would have complained.
That I wouldn’t need them.
That I could protect myself.
But this was Luffy. The Luffy with the beautiful smile, with the laugh that I don’t mind hurting my ears. The Luffy with the neverending appetite. The Luffy with the twisted past and the great future. The Luffy that can make me forget about my past, about my lost.
The Luffy I love.
“I know you will.” I said finally, smiling softly. “You are the future pirate king, after all.”
He chuckled and sniffed. “Yes, I am. And you will be there to, you know. Right hand or something, I’ll ask Robin tomorrow."
I kissed his hair. “You do that, Luffy-ya. I’m okay with everything.”
“I love you, Torao.”
I didn’t answer, and I didn’t need to. I just hold him even closer, so close that my arms begun to hurt.
And when I looked up into the sky this time, there were stars.