Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

[ THE SPEAKER ]  opened [ TOWER STAFF COMMUNICATION CHANNEL ]

[ THE SPEAKER ] added [ ZAVALA FORGE ], [ SHAXX FORGE ], [ SALADIN FORGE ], [ IKORA REY ], [ TESS EVERIS ], [ AMANDA HOLLIDAY ], [ CAYDE-6 ], [ SHIRO-4 ], [ RAHOOL AVARI ], [ THE HIVEBANE ] and [ EVA LAVANTE ]

SPEAKER: Staff, I have created this channel in case any of us are unable to communicate normally or are in a state of emergency and need assistance. Please utilize this appropriately.

[ CAYDE-6 ] entered [ TOWER STAFF COMMUNICATION CHANNEL ]

[ THE HIVEBANE ] entered [ TOWER STAFF COMMUNICATION CHANNEL ]

[ SHAXX FORGE ] entered [ TOWER STAFF COMMUNICATION CHANNEL ]

[ SHIRO-4 ] entered [ TOWER STAFF COMMUNICATION CHANNEL ]

CAYDE: oh sweet a chatroom

CAYDE: im gonna go tell amanda

SHAXX: Why is there a child in here.

HIVEBANE: WOW

SPEAKER: Cayde, Lord Shaxx, Guardian, what part of emergency do you not understand?

SHAXX: What emergency.

[ AMANDA HOLLIDAY ] entered [ TOWER STAFF COMMUNICATION CHANNEL ]

[ ZAVALA FORGE ] entered [ TOWER STAFF COMMUNICATION CHANNEL ]

HOLLIDAY: Ooh, are we using those new communicators now?

HOLLIDAY: Wow, I didn't expect its primary use to be a chatroom!

SPEAKER: It's not a chatroom.

HIVEBANE: sure

SHIRO: i cant believe this chat is already doomed.

ZAVALA: I see that this is going to go as well as it did previously.

CAYDE: there was a time when we utilized this thing in the past??

ZAVALA: The Iron Lords thought the same thing in their prime.

ZAVALA: Shaxx and I found some archives of their old logs.

SHAXX: Gheleon sure knows how to meme, hes my inspiration.

[ SALADIN FORGE ] entered [ TOWER STAFF COMMUNICATION CHANNEL ]

SALADIN: What is this.

SPEAKER: Still not a chatroom.

HIVEBANE: too late sir, were here to stay

SPEAKER: ...

[ THE SPEAKER ] left [ TOWER STAFF COMMUNICATION CHANNEL ]

SHIRO: incredible.

SHAXX: It hasnt even been ten minutes.

SHAXX: Im just glad that he didnt restrict a lot of the admin powers

HIVEBANE: how do we change the room name this one sucks

CAYDE: sheer will of glaring at the title

HIVEBANE: ...

HIVEBANE: its not working

HOLLIDAY: Hivebane... hon...

SHAXX: >:3c guess what i just found

SHIRO: EMILE SHAXX FORGE YOU DID NOT JUST >:3C US

SHAXX: I SURE AS FUCK DID

SHAXX: BECAUSE GUESS WHAT

ZAVALA: Shaxx, do NOT.

SHAXX: !airhorn

CAYDE: WHAT THE FLYING FUCK WAS THAT

HOLLIDAY: TRAVELER'S LIGHT, YOU JUST SCARED HALF THE FRAMES TO DEATH!

SHIRO: excuse you im supposed to be petting wolves how am i supposed to do that when there are none around

SALADIN: Why must you be this way.

[ SALADIN FORGE ] banned [ AIRHORN BOT ]

SHAXX: WHAT

SHAXX: WHAT THE FUCK WHY CANT I UNBAN IT

HIVEBANE: looks like only the person who banned it can unban it

SHAXX: .....................................thats so redundant...................

SALADIN: Just like this chat, unfortunately.

SALADIN: Why am I even here, I am not at the Tower.

SHIRO: i'm not either but he still added me

CAYDE: he wanted all the important people to have a nice safe place to meme

HIVEBANE: if theres important people in here shouldnt u leave cayde

HOLLIDAY: OMT HIVEBANE GOIN' IN FOR THE KILL

CAYDE: HB WHAT THE FUCK

CAYDE: HOW CAN YOU DO THIS TO ME

CAYDE: YOUR BEST COMMANDER

ZAVALA: Debatable.

CAYDE: SHUT

SHAXX: ...

SHAXX: Are you not going to finish that sentence.

CAYDE: NO BECAUSE I GOT MURDERED BY A THREE YEAR OLD

HIVEBANE: cayde my body is at least a couple thousand years old

SHIRO: you were dirt for most of those couple thousand years.

SHAXX: In comparison to us you are a tiny baby

HIVEBANE: IM A TINY BABY THAT KILLED THREE GODS AND A DELUSIONAL PRIEST WHERES MY RESPECT

SHAXX: Where did you put it.

HOLLIDAY: Y'all just in the mood to murder each other tonight, aren'tcha?

SALADIN: If you want to murder each other, just go into the Crucible.

SHAXX: Yes because im going to verbally kill my opponent.

SHAXX: CATCH THESE Y'S WARLOCK, FRESH FROM THE VOWELS.

CAYDE: y isnt a vowel?

HIVEBANE: what if it wants to be a pilot huh

ZAVALA: It's a vowel when it wants to be.

SHIRO: you act like it has feelings

ZAVALA: Appreciation of language composition, pick up a book sometime.

SHIRO: DO YOU KNOW WHERE I AM, Z

SHIRO: IF I SO MUCH AS LOOK AT A BOOK OR SCROLL, SALADIN AND TYRA WILL TOSS ME OFF THE SIDE OF THE PEAK

SHAXX: He did that to me once back during training

SHAXX: Up until he realized that i was just trying to learn english

HOLLIDAY: Wait, English isn't your first language?

SHAXX: Haha no i'm french

HIVEBANE: but u sound british

SHAXX: People come and go gremlin

SHAXX: Also my accent was the worst shit so i just mimicked everyone else until i found one i liked

HIVEBANE: shaxx what the fuck

CAYDE: HEY WATCH YOUR FUCKIN LANGUAGE

SALADIN: I'm glad this is just as miserable as the last time we used this.

ZAVALA: Would you rather Lord Gheleon and Lady Efrideet be in here memeing, Father.

SALADIN: ...this is fine.

SHAXX: HEY DAD

SALADIN: Absolutely not.

SHAXX: >:C

HOLLIDAY: You can't listen to one son and ignore the other, Sal.

SALADIN: Watch me.

SALADIN: And don't call me 'Sal'.

CAYDE: k sally

SALADIN: ...

HIVEBANE: saladman

SHIRO: saladbin

ZAVALA: We used to call him 'Saladad' behind his back.

SALADIN: Zavala, what.

ZAVALA: What.

SHAXX: Wot.

SALADIN: Stop that.

SHAXX: Wtf you started it.

SALADIN: What did I tell you about being a follower, though.

SHAXX: THAT PHILOSOPHY IS WHAT PISSED YOU OFF DURING TWILIGHT GAP

SHAXX: LET ME LIVE A HYPOCRITE-FREE LIFE!!!!!!

SALADIN: I'm not stopping you.

SHIRO: okay but you literally tried five hundred years ago and completely fucked his self-esteem and pride in the process

SHAXX: SHIRO WHAT THE FUCK

SHIRO: I'M NOT WRONG

HOLLIDAY: HAHAHAHA, IT KEEPS GETTING WILDER AND WILDER EVERY TIME I LOOK BACK

SALADIN: Ridiculous.

[ SALADIN FORGE ] left [ TOWER STAFF COMMUNICATION CHANNEL ]

SHAXX: YOU DONT GET TO JUST LEAVE

[ SALADIN FORGE ] left [ TOWER STAFF COMMUNICATION CHANNEL ]

SHAXX: GET BACK HERE AND FACE YOUR PROBLEMS

SHAXX: AND BY PROBLEMS I MEAN ME

SHAXX: IM YOUR PROBLEM

SALADIN: You are being an inconvenience.

SHAXX: IM AN INCONVENIENCE EVERYBODY NEEDS

SALADIN: Stop yelling.

SHAXX: IM NOT YELLING IM JUST TYPING REALLY AGGRESSIVELY IN CAPS

SALADIN: Stop that.

SHAXX: NO

SALADIN: Stop.

SHAXX: NO

SALADIN: Stop.

SHAXX: NO

ZAVALA: I hate my family sometimes.

CAYDE: are you kidding this is great 

HIVEBANE: all in all i think centuries old guardian family issues are definitely an emergency that needs discussing

Chapter Text

[ TESS EVERIS ] entered [ FUCKGUARD TOWER ]

EVERIS: @HIVEBANE I see you over there at the ledge what are you doing?

[ THE HIVEBANE ] reentered [ FUCKGUARD TOWER ]

HIVEBANE: i just want to see whats going on at the bottom of the tower

EVERIS: There's an elevator you can take you know.

EVERIS: Also it's the food festival the Citizens from the Market District do one every month to strengthen Citizen-Guardian relationships.

HIVEBANE: food??

HIVEBANE: aw i wanna go all i have is leftover candy from the festival of the lost

HIVEBANE: smells good.

EVERIS: Then go down or do you need someone to hold your hand?

HIVEBANE: i... well...

HIVEBANE: ikora doesnt want me to go into the city

EVERIS: What why?

HIVEBANE: first it was bc nobody knows what species i am

HIVEBANE: now i think its bc im the new taken king

EVERIS: You did get taller and grow more arms.

EVERIS: Taken King or not it's rude to keep you here just because people don't understand what you are.

EVERIS: @IKORA

[ IKORA REY ] reentered [ FUCKGUARD TOWER ]

IKORA: Yes?

EVERIS: Dear what the hell

EVERIS: If the Hivebane can storm a giant ship that is occupied by our deadliest enemy and come out alive I think they can explore the City they're protecting.

IKORA: Is this about the food festival?

IKORA: We do not want to alarm the Citizens, we've talked about this before.

EVERIS: That's very rude.

IKORA: ...

IKORA: Take the elevator.

HIVEBANE: !!

HIVEBANE: yay!!

[ THE HIVEBANE ] went idle.

EVERIS: We're talking about this later.

EVERIS: Also please don't spy on them they'll be fine.

IKORA: I won't.

IKORA: Maybe.

EVERIS: Tell you what how about we go down there ourselves?

EVERIS: Call it a date.

IKORA: What about Amanda?

EVERIS: She's already down there with some friends we can probably meet up with her.

IKORA: Hm, I suppose.

IKORA: @CAYDE @ZAVALA

CAYDE: wat.

ZAVALA: Why are you pinging us, we're all in the Hall.

IKORA: That would require a verbal answer from Cayde.

CAYDE: HEY

CAYDE: RUDE

IKORA: Would you two be able to function while I'm away?

ZAVALA: I can, I am uncertain about Cayde.

CAYDE: WHY ARE YOU TWO SO MEAN TODAY!!!!

CAYDE: I AM A FULLY FUNCTIONIN ADULT I CAN TAKE CARE OF MYSELF!!

ZAVALA: 'Functioning' is debatable.

CAYDE: COME ON BELIEVE IN ME FOR ONCE ITS NOT EVEN THAT BUSY

IKORA: I suppose you're right about that.

IKORA: Still, at least refrain from inciting any risky missions while I am away.

CAYDE: fine

IKORA: And please redirect anyone looking for me to the library.

CAYDE: wait why

ZAVALA: I agree, why?

IKORA: Many people come with questions easily found in our archives.

IKORA: Unless they're a newborn, just put them there.

CAYDE: LOL

ZAVALA: I see.

CAYDE: omt are you smilin??

ZAVALA: Am I not allowed to be amused?

CAYDE: no you can its just

CAYDE: its

CAYDE: nvm

ZAVALA: ?

ZAVALA: I'm glad I have your approval.

CAYDE: haha yeah...

CAYDE: anyways have fun with your date you two say hello to amanda for me

EVERIS: Thanks we will :)

- DIRECT MESSAGES: IKORA REY & CAYDE-6 --

IKORA: That was unbelievably gay.

CAYDE: SHUT UP YOURE THE ONE GOIN ON A DATE WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND!!!

IKORA: I will not judge.

IKORA: In fact, I will encourage it.

IKORA: Go get 'im, tiger.

IKORA: Or should I say,

IKORA: Wolf.

CAYDE: DONT DO THIS TO ME

CAYDE: GET OFF YOUR COMMUNICATOR AND GO BE GAY WITH TESS!!

IKORA: ;)

-- FUCKGUARD TOWER --

HIVEBANE: @SHAXX i didnt know u had freckles!

SHAXX: I have too many. people wouldnt take me seriously like this.

SHAXX: Also who told you this.

HIVEBANE: im at the food festival!

HIVEBANE: i can see u n shiro at the ramen stand.

HIVEBANE: hi shiro!

SHIRO: hey, bud! you enjoying yourself?

HIVEBANE: yea!! im trying the bulgogi across the street

SHAXX: Nice choice.

HIVEBANE: whyre u two out of ur armor

HIVEBANE: looks like a majority of ppl are in theirs

SHIRO: it's nice to be out of it sometimes.

SHAXX: People dont recognize me unless theyre one of my redjacks.

HIVEBANE: is it bc of the freckles?

SHAXX: ...maybe...

SHIRO: i think theyre nice.

SHIRO: they suit you.

SHAXX: What really.

SHAXX: Oh um

SHAXX: Thanks?

HIVEBANE: lol

SHIRO: what.

SHAXX: What.

HIVEBANE: nothin :)

HIVEBANE: have fun u two im going to the dumpling stand

[ THE HIVEBANE ] went idle.

SHAXX: Why did they get so coy.

SHIRO: ...who knows.

SHIRO: you wanna try the funnel cakes? i think they have an exo-friendly version

SHAXX: Ooh lets go.

-- DIRECT MESSAGES: CAYDE-6 & SHIRO-4 --

CAYDE: haha youre gay

SHIRO: in other news, the sun is hot.

CAYDE: youre gay for shaxx

CAYDE: this is like your 15th date

CAYDE: does he even know its a date

SHIRO: idk i hope but also?? idk

SHIRO: hhhnnnfffffff he's giggling why is he so cute what do i do

CAYDE: hold his hand or somethin 

SHIRO: wait

SHIRO: why am i asking you, you can't even compliment zavala without fucking up.

SHIRO: over text no less.

CAYDE: SHUT UP.

CAYDE: I CAN TALK TO HIM JUST FINE!

SHIRO: you can talk to him but can you compliment or flirt with him without stuttering or making it sound like an insult.

CAYDE: YES I CAN.

SHIRO: fifty glimmer says you can't.

CAYDE: FUCK

CAYDE: YOURE ON ASSHOLE