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English
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Part 6 of Twelfth Doctor One Shots Series 10 , Part 45 of Doctor Who Fics in Order
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2017-05-10
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1,480
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Bit of My Life That You're Not In

Summary:

Basically, things happened between when the Doctor left the students on the corner and when he went down to the vault. Mostly addressing this, because I doubt Moffat ever will. So, it will probably end up AU later.

Work Text:

It was a few hours after the house collapse when Bill wandered back to the university, unsure what to do. She looked up and saw the Doctor was pacing in his room. Well, he had made a comment about not sleeping. She made her way to the door of his office and knocked.

“Come in, Bill.”

She opened the door and closed it behind her. “How did you know it was me?”

He just raised an eyebrow at her. She rolled her eyes and gave the answer. “Because who else would turn up here this late at night?”

The Doctor nodded and sat in his chair. He gestured for her to do the same, but she shook her head and paced in silence. The Doctor rested his elbows on the desk, his chin against his folded hands, and waited. This went on for a few moments. Finally Bill sat and took a deep breath. “Look, I know this is probably against some rule of Time or something, but…”

The Doctor held up a finger to stop her. “No conversation that ever started with that sentence has ever ended well for anyone.”

Bill swallowed hard. Okay, clearly not the right approach with the Doctor for this. Or maybe he was upset with her about the ‘granddad’ thing, or maybe upset that she told him this was the part of her life where he wasn’t welcome. But he had said he understood. Even said that there were lines between them… So why would he be upset?

His voice broke into her thoughts. “Consider it a bit of advice, before you continue.”

She shook her head, because she was now confused. Maybe she was the one with the problem. After all, since he stayed, he ended up saving them. She had been so sure she had been right about things. But clearly she had been wrong. After all, as soon as the problem was solved in the Doctor’s mind, he had left, as she had asked.

The Doctor was tired of her pussy-footing. He stood and gestured to the TARDIS. “I have a better idea, go to the TARDIS.”

Bill sighed, more from frustration at herself than what he had said. “Doctor, I’m not really in the mood for an adventure right now.”

“Good. Neither am I. Go on.”

That caused something to break in her. She stood and started to pace in an agitated state. “You don’t understand! Everything that I held dear was in that house and it’s all gone! Everything that I wanted near me. Things that help me when I’m sad! It all was in there and now I don’t have any of it!”

The Doctor was completely calm in the face of her outrage. For a brief moment he thought about telling her about the times he had been without the TARDIS or the destruction of Gallifrey, but that would bring up other things he didn’t want to talk about. “I do understand. Go into the TARDIS.”

She had started to cry against her will. She never wanted to cry in front of the Doctor. As if that would break some unspoken agreement between them. But they were a mixture of tears. Anger at him for behaving like this. Sadness for all she had lost. The lingering horrors from having watched people get consumed by the lice. Relief since their lives were restored. She was over tired as well. Basically she probably wouldn’t have been able to stop herself from crying if she wanted. She slumped into a corner and sank to the floor, trying to make herself as small as possible.

The Doctor approached her, but didn’t rebuke her tears. He simply offered a hand to her. “Bill, please.”

It was the ‘please’ that caught her attention. She didn’t think the man ever used that word other than as a way to manipulate others. Only this time, there was a sincerity that she couldn’t ignore. She looked at the hand and in it was a tissue. She hadn’t even noticed it at first. She really was in a state. She took the tissue with a mumbled, “Thank you,” before using it to dry her eyes and blow her nose.

The Doctor gave her a few moments to do that and then he offered his hand – just his hand this time, to help her up. “TARDIS.”

She sighed and against her better judgement, accepted his assistance to stand, and went to the TARDIS. She put her hand on the handle and turned back to the Doctor. He gestured with a wave of his hand that she should go in. She sighed heavily again and pushed the door to enter.

There, in a big pile were all her things, just like they had been in the morning. Her eyes started to well up again. She turned and the Doctor was much closer than she had expected. She gasped. “H-how did you…?”

“Time machine.” He interrupted.

She shook her head. “I know that much. How did you know I’d ask?”

He offered a small shrug. “I know what it’s like to lose everything.” He approached the TARDIS and rested his hands on the console in an affectionate manner. He had lost her so many times. “And I know what it means to have something precious I lost returned to me.” He turned to face Bill. “Besides, I told you that ‘Time and Relative Dimension in Space’ means two things: ‘What the hell’ and ‘Life’. This time it was both.” He offered a sheepish sort of smile to her.

Bill approached him. “Brace yourself, Doctor. Because I have the impression you’re not the hugging sort, but I’m going to this time.”

He tensed at her words, but still offered her a nod to say that it was okay.

She approached and wrapped her arms around him. “Thank you. I was only going to ask for the photos of mum. I didn’t know how much I wanted the other things until I saw them here.”

He gave her a small hug in return. “It was my pleasure.”

“I didn’t give an order this time.”

“You didn’t have to.”

“Didn’t even have to ask, apparently.” She paused for a moment as she broke the hug. “What about everyone else’s stuff?”

The Doctor shook his head. “I told you. I’m in hiding. If I were to go around rescuing everything, well....” He shrugged.

“I understand.” But she couldn’t quite keep the disappointment out of her voice.

“Of course, they could go to the charity shops on High Street. They might find some things there.”

Bill smirked. “You can’t do it, can you? You can’t ever give in.”

The Doctor pursed his lips. “Oh, I can. And I have. But this is preferable to that.”

Bill’s expression turned serious. “Doctor, I’m sorry.”

The Doctor looked confused. “For what?”

“Trying to push you away. Telling you that there’s parts of my life you’re not allowed.”

“Bill, you’re my student. Even if we expand it and say I’m your mentor, I have no delusions that I’m allowed in every bit of your life. But… when people’s lives are in danger…”

Bill smirked. “You’ll save them no matter the cost. Yeah. I get that. I suppose I’m apologising for being blinded to the fact that you weren’t trying to invade my space, but that you just wanted to help.”

The Doctor smirked now. “You were surrounded by other students, you were trying to build a reputation with them. Even if I don’t understand why humans behave in the silly ways they do, I understand how the behaviours work.”

“How do I explain this to Moira?”

“Tell her the truth, she’ll never believe you.”

She gently swatted at his arm. “Shut up. I’m being serious.”

“So am I.” He shook his head. “Okay, okay. You said she wasn’t going to be around today anyway. So just tell her you ended up only moving bedding and such and had changed your mind and decided to get the rest later.”

“Is that a secret offer to deliver everything back home?

The Doctor smirked. “Secret? I thought I was being rather overt.”

“We’re okay, then? You still want to help me with stuff like this?”

“Bill, would it make you feel better if I told you there were parts of my life that I didn’t want you in either?”

She offered a relaxed kind of smile. “Actually, yeah, it does.”

He nodded. “Off you go, then.”

She looked confused.

“Home. I don’t want to show up there if Moira is there, so you go and text me if she’s not and I’ll drop this stuff off for you.”

She nodded. “Okay, see you in a few.”

With that, she went off home. The Doctor decided he had done well in choosing her. Even mundane things like moving were more interesting with her.